A/N: Some Quick Facts about this Fic:
Chapters: 37
Pairing: Azula x Ty Lee
Rated: M for strong sexual content, moderate violence, violent references, strong language, suggestive dialogue, mature humor, use of alcohol, references to past nonconsensual incest and mild blood and gore.
Notes: This fic is very slightly AU. I wrote all 180k words before posting, before reading The Search and before Smoke and Shadow came out, but I did edit it to include as much introduced canon as possible. It still does follow a different chain of events after the comet, though, and I didn't write in any new characters (Kiyi, Kei Lo, etc.) or change the heart of the material.

Restraint

chapter one: locked

"What is better - to be born good, or to overcome your evil nature through great effort?"
- Paarthurnax, Skyrim -

"She doesn't even say anything," Zuko says calmly, gesturing at the closed door. Ty Lee walks towards it, ignoring the Fire Lord. "It's locked. I mean, if you can get her to open it, by all means..."

It is an abnormally hot day, even by Fire Nation standards. The sun is blazing, an off-orange color. Ty Lee is sweating in beads, even after dropping down a few layers of clothes and washing off her face paint. She followed Suki to the Fire Nation while the Sokka holds a summit with a few dignitaries. It was personal for her; a trip home was exactly what she needed.

Zuko has called Ty Lee here for reasons other than a friendly visit. He wants her help, and he wants it desperately. Azula has so far been silent, confining herself to her room, blank... empty. She has lost her willpower, but that does not mean she is harmless. Zuko, as an agreement with Aang, has informed everyone that Azula's bending was taken, as Ozai's was.

But that is not true. It is a lie, and, so far, no one has found out, seeing as Azula refuses contact with others. Aang and Zuko agreed she needed to learn restraint above all else, and if anyone can forcibly restrain Azula, it is Ty Lee. Her chi-blocking could be instrumental in allowing Azula to move beyond being locked in her room, hiding her bending.

"She really lost her bending?" Ty Lee asks, looking Zuko up and down. He swallows uncomfortably.

"Yes..." He will look like a liar later, but, for now, he does not care.

Ty Lee recalls watching Azula practice for hours, the same move again and again. The blue flames licked the air as Azula cursed to herself and pursued perfection relentlessly. But the acrobat was always amazed by every move that Princess Azula made, captivated by even her breathing. They were more than friends in ways that were never truly answered, the swirling dance of sexual tension cut short by a betrayal. Azula had to go down. She was... wrong. But that does not mean that Ty Lee feels no remorse. It does not mean that Ty Lee does not sometimes wonder what could have been.

"I was kind of grateful that she shut up for once," Mai says and Zuko pretends he did not hear her. "What? Her lunatic raving and violent threats were a little unpleasant."

Mai tried with Azula. How she tried. She was the one to drag Azula to the asylum, the one to try to bring her food in her bedroom or try to make her talk. But she only got violent threats and spewed insults in response, or catatonic silence. Her patience for Azula has run dry and she is getting tired of dealing with the princess.

Ty Lee feels intimidated for a moment. She has faced a great many opponents in her life and managed to stay positive, but the thought of knocking on this door makes her stomach twist. The Fire Lord and Fire Lady wait for her to approach with bated breath, curiosity in even Mai's eyes. If Azula were to answer anyone, it would be Ty Lee; both Zuko and Mai know that. And the princess has not responded to a servant, her mother, her brother, Mai or any other who made a feeble attempt.

"Well, um, I guess I'll just..." Ty Lee walks to the door and holds her fist over it. Pause. She cannot summon the willpower to knock. Finally, she does. Bang, bang. "Uh, hello?"

Mai looks as amused as Mai can look. Zuko shrugs and walks away, ready to attend to more important duties. His newlywed wife, on the other hand, stands and watches. The Ty Lee and Azula dance was always entertaining, and without the threat of lightning, it is even funnier. Their friendship ended bitterly, and, secretly, Mai wants Ty Lee to succeed not just because it would make her smirk, but because Azula is too accomplished to spend her life wallowing in the misery of a single failure.

Maybe Mai hates Azula; most likely she still loves her. But Azula does not deserve this. After an asylum, after the Boiling Rock, after being dragged home and taken to her room, her bending removed. Maybe Azula deserves what Ty Lee wants to give her.

"Hello?" Ty Lee knocks again. She turns to Mai, one eyebrow raised. "Is she even in there?"

"If she wanted to escape she would have already. It's not like we boarded up the windows or anything." Mai shrugs and Ty Lee sighs. "I don't know why you care so much. It's not like you bothered to come here before."

Ty Lee bristles at that accusation, even if it is true. "I had my reasons," Ty Lee snaps ferociously and Mai just crosses her arms, refusing to stand down. "And I'm giving her a chance regardless of you not being able to."

Mai cannot argue with that. "Look, you just, keep trying... or don't. I'll see you later."

The Fire Lady leaves and Ty Lee considers how she could have avoided the altercation, but she returns her focus to Azula.

"They're gone now." Silence. "Did you escape?"

Ty Lee would not put it past her to have grappled out of a window. Azula always had a knack for doing impossible things. Ty Lee has seen her scale walls and burn down the sky. Ba Sing Se fell at a few of her words, one thought, one plan. The princess does not belong locked in her bedroom like a sullen teen who went through a bad break-up.

"No." The voice coming through the door is familiar, but hoarse, as if it has not been used in a long time. Ty Lee grins. Already progress. "Are you going to liberate me, Ty Lee?" Scathing.

"Well, it's locked from your side, you see─"

"Sarcasm. I was being sarcastic."

The disembodied voice definitely belongs to her old friend. Ty Lee supposes that this is a momentous occasion, but she does not think Azula wants to celebrate. She leans against the door and continues with, "So, do you want to come out?"

Silence. Ty Lee's heart flutters in fits and starts as her throat feels swollen. Her stomach twists with anxiety.

"No pressure or anything, princess." She hopes that addition makes a difference.

"You're not supposed to call me that anymore, Ty Lee." Bitter. This is going to be more difficult than Ty Lee had previously imagined.

"Well, I just wanted to say that I'm in town for a couple of weeks. Sokka and Suki are doing some kind of summit. It sounds pretty boring so I'll probably just be here. So if you ever want to hang out or anything, I'm around!" Ty Lee offers. Stay positive.

There is no response.

Within her room, Azula has not moved out of her bed for... well she hasn't kept track of how long. The curtains are closed, basking the room in a red glow. Her bed was never comfortable to her, but now she has no desire to leave. There is not a reason to leave. Her life is over. Just completely over.

And this promise with the Avatar? She supposes she has to keep it. Even if Ty Lee starts meddling. It was the most difficult thing she ever did in her life, and never once has she kept a promise. But this time, it is her life on the line. If Zuko were to find out, he would throw her back in prison.

Her bed is far more pleasant than prison. She has found the easiest way to not reveal herself or her intentions is to simply not say a word. Not talking never occurred to Azula. People always wanted to listen to what she had to say, that was inevitable. And now, she is silenced. The beast is dethroned.

She cannot remember the last time she said anything true. Maybe that played into why she just gave up. It wasn't helping her anymore. She has no power; she has to wait for someone to slip up so she can pick it up and run with it.

Would you really escape? the nagging thought echoes.

"Yes, of course I would," she mutters to herself, rolling over and closing her eyes. Trying to sleep makes her uncomfortable. She has been having excruciating nightmares since before her life decided to turn against her. She watched everything crumble.

Failure. Failure. Failure.

Azula falls asleep.

Failure.

[X]

Zuko comes to give Ty Lee his proposition while she is making her bed in the guest room and unpacking her non-Kyoshi Warrior clothes. Sokka and Suki offered for her to stay in their Caldera apartment, but Ty Lee shook her head. Particularly since Azula is clearly in such a mess.

"I wanted to, uh, talk to you," Zuko says and Ty Lee nods once. She seems so positive that Zuko is stunned. "About Azula."

"I want to help her," Ty Lee says fiercely and Zuko's eyes flicker in surprise. "I want to make her... better. I want to redeem her, Zuko."

Zuko opens his mouth to tell her the truth about Azula's bending, but he changes his mind. Perhaps that is what is making her sympathetic. He just nods.

Ty Lee smiles and hugs tightly Zuko, filling his nostrils with the scent of cinnamon perfume, before continuing to unpack.

"My first step is to get her out of her room," Ty Lee says with a confidence that he, Ursa and Mai now severely lack after so much time dealing with Azula.

Zuko clenches his jaw.

[X]

"Good morning!"

Azula never thought she would hear that voice again. That morning chirrup that declares itself to everyone ten miles around. She threw the bitch in prison. Ty Lee turned against her. And now she says good morning. No amends can be made in this friendship. None. Not one.

"Are you not awake, princess?"

You're not supposed to call me that anymore, Ty Lee. Well, actually, it sounds kind of nice. I could get used to being called princess again. And I could get used to having my obnoxiously helpful little servant, spirals in Azula's thoughts.

But she does not reply. Nothing feels worth her time. She is nineteen and her life is already over. Just fucking kill her now. She pushes the pillow down on top of her head and tries to drown out the world. Without pursuit of power, without the throne as an option, Azula has nothing to live for. The circus freak who gives Azula strange shivers and misguided sexual thoughts is not going to change the fact that the reign of Princess Azula has come to a bitter close.

"Well, I'm having breakfast and I thought you would like to join me!" Ty Lee exclaims and Azula sighs. This is getting grating. "Your Uncle is here visiting from Ba Sing Se! He said he was going to teach me..."

Azula tunes her out. Bliss.

"...So if you want to come, you can!" And her voice gets louder. Azula draws her knees to her chest and tries to go back to sleep.

"Do you want to go for a walk?"

Are you kidding me? Azula sinks further into the mattress.

"It's really nice out. Not too hot or anything," Ty Lee continues, shouting through the door. Azula just wants to end it.

"If I come with you, will you stop bothering me?" Azula calls, her voice sore. It hurts to speak, and when she opens her lips, they peel. She does not feel like herself, though she has not felt like herself in a long time.

"Of course!" Ty Lee does not even know what she is saying. But Azula supposes she can roll with it. It would not be terrible to go for a walk, she supposes. She slowly gets up and stumbles slightly. Her legs feel numb and her arms ache. Clothes, clothes, clothes. She looks around and every outfit is accompanied by a painful memory.

She gasps and sobs. Her throat is raw and her fingers are bloodied from clawing at the door. The thoughts race around in her mind, chasing her, devouring her. The room in the asylum is nice, but it feels even more oppressive than a prison cell.

Panic. What's happening? Where is she?

The memories play and refuse to let up. Her stomach sinks. She claws at the door even more, ripping at the stone as it peels off her previously flawless fingernails.

"I don't have anything to wear!" Azula shouts, though her room is littered with clothing.

"Let me help you," Ty Lee offers and Azula rolls her eyes regally. You have got to be kidding me, Azula thinks in frustration. "No really!"

Azula leans against the wall for a moment. She feels slightly breathless. It took so much work to get over the low she was at. She is not going to let Ty Lee ruin that for her. But... well, she caves. Azula unlocks the door for the first time in a long time. Ty Lee looks different. Older. Azula supposes she looks different too. They were just children, those years ago. It makes Azula feel even more livid about the harshness of her punishment.

Five years in prison, she was sentenced to. But she did prefer it over the asylum, if she had to choose. But her fate hiding her bending to cover for Zuko is even more grating than her imprisonment. Apparently the world leaders would not allow Azula's liberation without her meeting her father's fate, but Aang and Zuko did not want to take her bending.

I was a child. They should be ashamed, Azula reminds herself. But maybe she was a war criminal. Maybe she was something awful.

Oh, yes, there was the asylum. Zuko's attempt at compassion. But Azula quickly quenched any possibility of her freedom by escape attempts and murders, and biting off people's fingers until the only option was to place her in prison and see if that worked. At this point, she has simply caved in. No asylum or prison could hold her, but her own home can. She may hate being locked up, but invisible bars are better than the literal.

"Are you in there?" Ty Lee is waving her hand frantically in front of Azula's face. Why am I doing this? Why? "So, let's find you some clothes."

Ty Lee tries not to look at her half-dressed friend. Azula has certainly grown into herself, albeit thinner than she should be. She is wearing a half on undershirt and underwear, all red. Dirty, Ty Lee notices. She must not have changed her clothes in a while. The sweat on her skin glitters, and her contours are painfully visible. She has blossomed in ways that Ty Lee struggles not to look at.

She and the princess have their romantic history, their past relationship, and Ty Lee hopes Azula does not take the way Ty Lee's protuberant eyes brush across her naked body in the wrong way.

"What are you staring at at? What?" Azula snaps with the familiar voracity, usually accompanied by blasts of blue flame. So the rumors are true; she has lost her bending. If she had it, Ty Lee is pretty certain that her hair would be on fire. Azula can strike fear into the heart of a grown man with her words. The silver tongue is more powerful than her bending, and she was once the most powerful firebender who ever lived. Both women are aware of that.

But, looking at Azula after years, feels like being hit by a bolt of lightning. It's shocking and dazing in a wild way that Ty Lee cannot describe. They had their odd moments, in childhood. But now they are grown, and any of the feelings that had for each other have dried up. Ty Lee is certain that they will never go back to how it once was.

"How about this?"

"Hideous."

"This?"

"Doesn't even match."

"Uh... this?"

"You're not even trying anymore, Ty Lee."

Azula finally picks up an old dress. It probably will not even fit anymore, but she pulls it over herself. Ty Lee cringes at the thought of the dirty clothes on her old best friend. Her hair has grown long and mess, tied back in a halfhearted bun. She used to spend hours making herself look perfect.

"I have to be perfect," Azula wails, kicking her foot against the wall. It hurts and she clutches onto it with both of her hands. "Why am I not perfect?"

Alone in a cell. Thought she saw her mother.

Again.

"So, we're going on a walk," Ty Lee says.

"Yes, you've made that rather clear," Azula retorts and Ty Lee smiles in response. It is funny how Ty Lee can thrive on the verbal abuse of someone she is convinced is her friend. Perhaps Azula should be kinder to her. But that may... that may upset the little balance there is. "Let's go."

They start to walk, Azula feeling wobbly. She feels incredibly foolish.

"I hope no one recognizes us," Azula mutters and Ty Lee thinks they might not. Azula looks paler, thinner, overgrown and out of place. The only thing that looks like her is the piercing, golden eyes. Ty Lee had thought about those eyes many times in the past, as they haunted her. Every day they haunted her.

Ty Lee walks through the palace, headed towards the gardens. She reaches out for Azula's hand, but she does not react. Impulsively, Ty Lee takes her hand in hers. She cringes, expecting to get singed. Azula is amazed at her own restraint. But they walk together, holding hands.

"We look like morons," Azula remarks as they walk out of the palace. "I hate being seen with you in public." I hate being seen in public, Azula's thoughts add.

"So, you look a lot better than last time we talked."

"That's not exactly an accomplishment."

Ty Lee takes a deep breath. Does she always have to be so negative? Ty Lee laments silently.

Azula stops in her tracks when she sees Iroh. She has always found him to be unpleasant; mostly because he always saw through her. He looks up and she has the sudden urge to hide. Azula has never backed out of a confrontation before, given the fact that she always wins.

Not always. Not anymore. You lost. You're a failure, Azula is reminded.

"...Anyway, it's good to see you're about." How did Uncle get in front of Ty Lee? Azula feels dizzy. Did she really zone out for that long?

Ty Lee replies, "Thank you, Zuko and Azula's uncle." She turns to Azula expectantly.

Azula stares at Iroh with stony silence. She hates him and she will never stop hating him.

"Azula," her uncle says and she fights the urge to roll her eyes, "you look much better."

Lies, Uncle, lies. She holds her tongue. Azula knows that he has always hated her.

"I was telling him how sorry we were for Ba Sing Se," Ty Lee remarks, nudging Azula. Azula rolls her eyes. She has had enough of this for a lifetime. Her family has always brought her great dismay, and now they just piss her off. "Azula is sorry too."

The doubt in Uncle's eyes is evident. Azula looks away and Ty Lee smiles awkwardly. She always does something awkward and Azula wishes that she wouldn't, but she supposes that is how it will be. This is all beyond uncomfortable to the disgraced princess, but for some reason, Ty Lee does not seem to care. The girl has absolutely no self awareness.

"I hope you feel better, Azula." Earnest. He actually meant that. Or maybe I'm hallucinating. It would not be the first time I saw something that wasn't there.

Ty Lee takes her old friend by the hand and guides her through the gardens. She is talking but not saying anything. Azula has always hated that about people. The flowers bend in the breeze, swaying in hot, ashen wind. They are a plethora of colors, the fertility of volcanic soil making this place beautiful. It makes Azula feel queasy. Her love for her Nation has not ended, but the flowers she once claimed were a testament to the superiority of flame now only bring back sour memories of a life she once had.

"This has been really nice but─"

Mai arrives, looking stunned that Azula is out of her room. After how hard she tried to get Azula walking around again, Ty Lee managed in more than one day. The metallic taste in Mai's mouth, she thinks might be jealousy, but she does not know.

"You really did it." Fuck. Mai. Actually, fuck Mai. "I guess you can actually annoy someone out of their misery."

The Fire Lady approaches them. She has an amused grin that Azula briefly fantasies about burning off of her face. Her fingers feel slightly hot and she gulps. Restraint. Restraint. Restraint.

Just her voice, everything about her, pisses Azula off. Restraint. Restraint. Restraint.

"Yeah," Ty Lee says, secretly hoping that Mai does not push it. This is clearly a delicate situation, and neither of Ty Lee's friends have ever been good with delicate situations. "We were just going."

Mai smirks slightly and Azula wants to slap it off of her face. Ty Lee drags Azula away from the beginning cat fight and takes her to a fountain. They sit down on the outside of it, Azula wobbling slightly. Azula frowns. Everything looks the same, but so different. She does not like it, nor the feeling that it gives her inside.

Ty Lee tries not to feel disappointed as she sits in silence with Azula. She supposes that it is only step one of the recovery. And Ty Lee decides that she will dedicate all of her positive energy towards bringing Azula back to her former self.

It has to happen.

[X]

"Do you even remember her former self?" Sokka says loudly, looking astounded. He mimes a rather impressive impression of Azula throwing fire and lightning at people, and ends it by throwing back his head in a silent evil laugh. "That. That was her former self. I think you should just leave it."

"I think I can change her, Sokka," Ty Lee says, touching his shoulder. Suki's expression falls. "I really do."

Sokka repeats his impression, this time with more vigor. Suki wishes sometimes that her boyfriend would mature to his own age, but she also knows that he has a point. It is most unwise to meddle with the mentally unstable former princess.

"Ty Lee, I don't think it's a good idea. I can station you somewhere else if it's a distraction."

"If this is a distraction, then maybe I quit." Ty Lee feels uncertain, her heart leaping into her throat. But something possessed her to say it. Sokka and Suki both look astounded. "Yeah. I quit."

Ty Lee turns on her heel, hoping she will not regret this for the rest of her life. And so, she walks off, back towards Zuko's palace. Is this more important to her? Is Sokka right?

What is she getting herself into?

[X]

Azula sits in her room, on the windowsill. Her chin touches her knees as she stares at the sunset. It is a vibrant red and orange, like everything around her seems to be. She thinks about her life before, and how low she had fallen. Whenever she closes her eyes she still feels like she is back in that cell, out of her mind.

She still feels... broken. And she does not know if she will ever stop being so miserable.

A little insect flutters by, and with a single fingertip, Azula disintegrates it in a minor blast of blue.