To Go, Or Not To Go

I wanted to get this posted ages ago, but life got in the way and it took me forever to finish it. It started from a small prompt and grew from there. It'll be a two-shot and while there is some UC, the real focus and purpose of this was Sam and Andy's relationship, so some UC stuff is twisted to make it work for what I wanted. :) Enjoy! And don't forget to let me know what you think with a review. :)

Disclaimer: I do not own Rookie Blue.

Chapter 1

Andy unlocked and opened the door to her condo, and Sam followed her in. It had been nearly a year since Sam was shot and things were going really well for them. They were happy, they were learning to open up more, and they got through any bumps in the road together. Tonight though, the silence in the truck on the way home from work told them both a storm was brewing.

"We gonna talk about the elephant in the room?" Andy asked, leaning back against the counter while she waited for the oven to heat up for dinner.

"What are you talking about?" he answered with a question as he set two places on her kitchen island.

"I wasn't the only one in the room when Steve made the offer, Sam. You heard it too and haven't said one word," she said.

Andy had been assigned to the detective's for the last week as they assisted Steve Peck with an investigation. Finally making headway, he gathered Sam, Traci and Andy for an update.

"We've made great progress the last few days and I've gotten the go ahead to put someone under to bring Joseph Martin down," Steve explained.

"About time we got this guy," Sam interjected. Joseph Martin was a small-town drug dealer, but the drugs he sold were dirty. Most were laced with something - sometimes another less expensive drug that he'd try to pass off as something better, and sometimes with poison that killed people. They needed to get him and his drugs off the streets.

"Who's going under?" Traci asked.

"Well, glad you asked, Nash" he said before looking over at Andy. "McNally, you fit the profile of who Martin likes to hire to work his bar. That's where we think most of the drug deals are going down and it's our best chance to get the intel we need. What'd'ya say?"

"You want me to go under?" she asked, eyes wide in surprise. She could feel Sam's eyes bearing down on her.

"Look, you know the investigation, but you haven't had any direct contact with Martin or his men like Traci has. We won't have to waste time getting you up to speed and I think you can do this," Steve explained.

"I, uh...When do you need an answer?" she asked, still processing the offer.

"I can give you until tomorrow to think it over, but I need an answer first thing. If you decide not to take it, I need time to find someone else and prep them," he said.

She nodded in understanding before finally looking over at Sam. She couldn't read his expression and didn't know what he thought about Steve's idea.

"Ok, well, let's catalogue all the evidence we have so far. I want everything organized to make sure we haven't overlooked anything before we send someone in," Steve said, waving his hand toward two boxes on Traci's desk.

Andy put a frozen pizza in the oven before facing Sam again, who was now leaning against the kitchen island taking a swig of the beer he held. "Sam, say something!"

"You've been assisting us with the case for a week. It's not surprising Peck offered it to you," he said, his voice void of emotion.

"Do you think I should take it?" she asked, taking a swig of her own beer.

"You should do what you want to do," he replied.

Andy slammed her beer bottle down and stalked off to her bedroom, frustrated that Sam wasn't showing any emotion over her possibly going undercover. She wasn't going to make a decision until she talked to him about it, but he wasn't making that easy. It was an interesting offer and Andy did enjoy going undercover, but she didn't want to leave Sam again for her job. She yanked open a drawer, grabbing yoga pants and a tank top, so she could change into something more comfortable.

When she turned around to toss the clothes on the bed, she saw Sam leaning against the frame of the door with his hands shoved into his pockets.

"You caught the lead that's giving us the opening to go in. You should be the one who gets to take Martin down," he said quietly as she replaced her jeans with the yoga pants.

She let out a sigh as she pulled off the top she was wearing, replacing it with the tank top. "I could be gone for months," she said, looking over at him.

"You might be."

She sat on the edge of the bed. "Can we talk about this? I told Steve I had to think about it because I wanted to talk it over with you."

"I'm not going to tell you what to do," he said, sitting down next to her.

"I don't want you to tell me, but I do want your opinion. Do you think I should take it?" she asked.

Sam kept his eyes glued to the floor, knowing if he looked at her his heart would take over his mind. "Yes," he finally said.

Andy pulled her legs up, propping her feet on the bed frame, and rested her chin on her knee. "I wasn't expecting that," she admitted. "I was ready to say no if you wanted me to stay."

"I'm not going to lie. I'm going to miss you like crazy, but this is a great opportunity for you," he said, turning his head to face her.

"You really think I can do it?" she asked, shifting so her cheek rested against her knee and she could look at Sam.

"You're a great cop. You've been under before. And you learned from the best," he said with a smirk. "You can do this. The question is, do you want to do it."

She stared at him for a moment before flopping back onto the bed. "I don't know. You're right, it is a great opportunity, but I'd be going in alone. I don't know if I can do that."

He twisted around so he could look at her. "You can do it. It's different being under alone, but you can do it."

"And you'd be okay with it? Really? Steve said I could be gone three or four months. That's a long time, Sam. I'm not sure I'm even okay with that," she admitted.

"Am I going to like not being near you for that long? No. But, we'll deal with it. Don't turn it down because you're worried about us. I'll be here when you get back," he said. "I'm not going anywhere."

Sam stood up, reaching out his hand until Andy grabbed it with her own, and he pulled her up. She rested her hands on his chest, taking a moment before she looked up at him, and sighed. "Honestly…I don't know what I want."

He kissed her forehead. "Think about it. You don't need to know what you want until tomorrow. And I'll support whatever decision you make."

And that's how long it took her. She weighed the pros and cons over and over in her head, not knowing what her decision was going to be until she walked into the detective's office after Parade. Standing there, all eyes were on her, as Sam, Steve and Traci waited for her response. Her eyes bounced among the detectives, stopping longer on Sam - and seeing the encouragement in his eyes - before going back to Steve. "I'll do it, on one condition. Sam is my handler," she said. "If I'm going in alone, I need to know someone I trust has my back."

Steve sucked in a deep breath as he considered her demand. The look of surprise on Sam's face told him this wasn't some preconceived plan concocted by the two of them. And it wasn't that horrible of an idea. The two of them knew each other better than anyone; if Andy got into trouble, Sam would know. And they were both well-versed in the case. "Okay."

Andy grinned and looked over at Sam, who was trying to hold back his excitement. "So, when do I leave?" she asked Steve.

"Tomorrow night. I need to talk to my CI, but the idea is she'll bring you in as a friend who just got back to Toronto and needs work.

Still assigned to the detectives, Andy spent the rest of the day working with Sam to prep her cover story and what she needed to do. Joseph Martin was the target and taking his entire organization down was the mission. She'd play a woman from Montreal who wanted to start a new life in a new city after her boyfriend cheated on her. Sam knew she'd be able to pull from her past to make the story real and knew that would only help her.

Steve's CI used to work for Joseph - and left only recently when she found her own sugar daddy and didn't need to work - and would be able to introduce Andy for her old job at the bar Joseph owned. Once she was in, she was not to let on that she already knew about his drug business, but to be open to it if someone let something slip. She was to get as close as she could and get as much information about the business as possible.

It put her mind at ease knowing Sam was not only helping her get ready for this assignment, but that he'd be there with her along the way. She knew they had to be careful, that this didn't give them free reign to break the rules, but she was at peace knowing he was the one who had her back.

That night, they didn't leave each other's side, knowing it was the last night they'd have together for a long while.

Twenty four hours later, Andy found herself being offered a job on the spot from Joseph Martin. One of the other waitresses, Bonnie, took a couple of days training Andy and showing her the ins and outs of the bar. Every once in a while Andy would catch Joseph watching her, but she expected that and did everything she could to impress him.

A little more than two weeks into the operation, Andy had overslept and was rushing around her undercover apartment trying to get ready for her shift at the bar. She was about to pick up her phone to make her regularly scheduled check-in with Sam, but instead she knocked her travel mug full of coffee all over it.

"Shit!" She tried drying it off with paper towels, but she couldn't even get it to turn on. Looking at her watch, she figured she had just enough time to stop at the payphone she'd seen a block away from the bar. They both knew she was a stickler to detail and never missed a check-in, so she knew he'd worry if he didn't hear from her. She grabbed her jacket and flew out the door, quarters in hand.

She cursed the world when she got to the payphone and it was dead. She ran around the block trying to find another one, but payphones were nearly as extinct as dinosaurs. She knew being late for work could ruin the whole operation because Joseph had been on the warpath the last few days and she couldn't risk being fired or even just having him pissed off at her. She weighed her options and realized she had to get to work and find a way to call Sam later.

As she took her spot behind the bar, Andy thought about using the phone there, but Joseph sometimes reviewed the phone records and both Sam and Steve told her never to call from there unless it was a dire emergency.

She tried to escape on break to find a phone somewhere, but the bar was packed on this Saturday afternoon and she couldn't grab more than five minutes at a time. Whenever she had a second, she kept trying to get her phone to at least turn on long enough to send a text, but it was no use.

Hours later when it had started to slow down, Andy figured she might finally be able to take a normal break and find a phone to call Sam. She was at the bar, filling an order for one of the waitresses, when she felt him. She didn't even have to turn toward the door to know Sam had walked in and was making his way to an empty section of the counter. She quickly finished the order and handed it to the waitress before taking a quick glance around to make sure no one was watching her.

"What can I get you?" she asked, sliding a coaster in front of him, like she did for any customer.

"Scotch, on the rocks," he answered. His eyes were fixed on her as she moved around pouring his drink.

"Can I get you anything else?" she asked, placing his drink in front of him. This was the first time he'd come to see her in person and she was nervous, so she let him take the lead.

Sam looked in the mirror behind her and saw no one was giving them a second glance. "Why didn't you check in?"

"I spilled coffee all over my phone this morning. I tried a payphone, but it wasn't working and I couldn't find another without being late," she said, wiping the counter down next to Sam as she spoke in hushed tones.

She had already told him about Joseph being a hard ass lately, so he understood why it was important she was on time. And truthfully, he was just glad she was okay. So many thoughts had run through his mind when she hadn't called and didn't answer the numerous times he'd tried to reach her.

"Alright, I'll have a new one dropped off in your mailbox tonight." He took a sip of his drink, watching her over the rim. "Everything okay?"

She nodded, moving to the other side of him as she continued to pretend to clean the bar. "Nothing new."

Sam's eyes alternated from making sure no one was in earshot of them and taking in Andy's appearance. She had dark circles under her eyes that told him she wasn't sleeping well and she she looked a little defeated. He couldn't tell if that was her playing the part or how honestly he could read whatever she was feeling.

"You're doing great, okay. You can do this," he told her. He had to stop himself from grabbing her hand to comfort her. He was already overstaying his welcome here. He'd seen that she was okay and he had to get out of there before he drew any suspicion.

He quickly swallowed the rest of his drink before pulling his wallet out and tossing a few bills on the bar. Andy played with the towel in her hands to prevent herself from reaching out to Sam as he stood up. She wanted to keep talking to him, but she kept her mouth shut in fear of saying the wrong thing and someone overhearing. So instead she gave him a smile that didn't reach her eyes.

He smiled back at her before turning to head toward the door. She stood in the same spot staring at him until the door closed behind him. As great as it was to see him, all she wanted now was for him to be able to stay. She took a deep breath before turning around and checking on the customers sitting at the bar.

A few days later while Andy was on shift, she realized the bar was low on napkins, so she went into the back storage room and grabbed a box. On her way out, she noticed the back door was wide open and went over to close it. She poked her head out the door first and saw money and drugs exchanging hands between one of the waitresses, Maryann, and James, who was one of Joseph's right hand men.

James' head snapped up before Andy could back away without being seen. "Sorry, I..uh...the door...closing...um...sorry," she stammered before turning quickly and heading back to her spot at the bar. She silently cursed herself. She was supposed to wait for Joseph to bring her into his operation, not find out about it this way. She was surprised when James didn't follow her back out to the bar, and couldn't help but notice how Maryann refused to look her in the eye as she returned to check on her tables.

Andy nervously unpacked the box of napkins. She was terrified, in a way, because she had no idea how James or Joseph would react. She could only hope it wouldn't set the undercover assignment back, and instead might be the opening she needed to get Joseph to trust her more and get more access to his operation.

After the bar closed that night, while Andy was cleaning up and stacking glasses in preparation for the next day, Joseph walked up to the bar and sat on one of the stools. "Slow night, huh?" he asked.

"Yeah, I guess, uh, slower than the last few," she replied, nervously wringing the rag in her hands.

"Have a drink with me, Andy," he said, nodding toward the bottles of scotch behind her.

Andy poured a bit of scotch into two glasses, silently waiting for him to drop whatever bomb he was about to hand down to her. She watched and waited as he took a slow sip, and finally brought her own glass to her lips as he remained quiet.

"So, I understand you may have seen something earlier you might have questions about," he said.

"No sir. I know how to mind my own business," she replied.

"And I can appreciate that." There was a pregnant pause as Andy felt his intense gaze boring down on her. "I have a private side to my business that I like to keep just that, private. You can understand that, can't you?"

"Yes sir. I'm just here to do the job you hired me for," she assured him.

Joseph downed the last of his drink before pulling an envelope out of his jacket pocket and sliding it across the counter toward Andy. "You've done a great job these last few weeks. Thanks for your hard work."

Andy gave him a smile as picked up the envelope, and waited until he had walked away before opening it. She found $1,000 tucked inside and blew out a breath. It wasn't a thank you for a job well done; it was payoff to keep quiet. He trusted her.

She couldn't wait until her next check-in with Sam to update him on this newest information.

Andy soon realized after that night that Joseph began to trust her more and more. He'd make sure she was on opening or closing shift on days he had meetings to buy or sell product before the bar opened or after it closed. Each time she'd witness anything, another "bonus" would be slid her way. Sometimes it was just her, sometimes there would also be other waitresses that Joseph trusted. Andy easily pieced together who Joseph trusted and who was part of his inner circle.

As she gained the trust of Joseph, Andy knew she had to take advantage of it. All of the intel she'd been able to pass along had been great, Sam assured her, but they still needed the one big piece that would tie the whole puzzle together. Andy and Sam had bounced around some ideas, but it was clear to Andy she had to get access to Joseph's computer.

So, nearly three months into the undercover operation, Andy took her normal break and acted like she was heading out to the back alley for some fresh air. Instead, she stood quietly outside of Joseph's office, listening for any sounds from inside. When she heard nothing, Andy slowly turned the knob, finally letting out a breath when she found the room empty.

She closed the door quietly before turning the lights on. There were file cabinets immediately to her left, but a quick tug on the handles told her they were locked. She could try to pick the locks, but didn't know how much time she'd have, so she set her sights on the computer. Sitting down at Joseph's desk, she pushed the power button and waited as it hummed to life. It didn't take her long to guess his password; he was really predictable.

She'd brought a USB drive with her, so she stuck it in the computer and began transferring his files. She wanted to see if the files even had any worthwhile information on them, but knew she didn't have enough time. She needed to get the files copies and get out of the office before anyone knew she was there.

It took several minutes, but when it was done, Andy pocketed the USB drive and stood up, just as the door to the office opened.

"Well, what do we have here?" Mark, one of Joseph's right hand men, and the slimiest of them, walked further into the room, closing the door behind him. Andy started to walk around the desk, but he stepped in front of her and stopped her movement. "What are you doing in the bosses office?"

Andy reached deep within to put on a confident front, even though she was shaking fiercely on the inside. "I, uh, I was checking my email. I was on break, no one was around, I thought it would be fine."

"Being in the bosses office alone is not fine, sweetheart," he said, continuing to step closer, which forced Andy backward until her legs hit the desk, and she tensed up. He was so close now she could smell his breath and it was nauseating, a combination of stale beer and cigarettes. She wanted to give him a toothbrush, or a breath mint, but this probably wasn't the ideal time to bring that up. Andy knew he'd had a thing for her since she started working at the bar and she decided that was the best way to get out of this situation.

She relaxed her body and laid a hand on his chest as she gave him a flirty pout. "I'm sorry. It won't happen again, I promise. I didn't…" She sniffled as if she was holding back tears. "I didn't think it would be a big deal since Joseph was out. I'm sorry," she said, casting her eyes to the floor.

He lifted his hand, cupping her jaw to raise her head until she was looking at him again. Andy felt repulsed when his thumb brushed back and forth against her cheek, but kept up the charade. "If you don't report this, I promise...I promise to make it up to you," she told him, smiling.

"Make it up to me, eh?" he asked, pressing his body into hers. "And just how would you do that?"

"Well…"

The ringing of Mark's phone interrupted them and he backed up as he looked at the caller ID. He let out an annoyed grunt realizing his fun with the sexy bartender would have to wait. "I have to take this. Get back to work."

Andy said a silent prayer as she moved quickly to the door to get away from Mark as quickly as possible. She finished her shift without seeing him again and only hoped she could finish this job without Mark wanting to cash in on her promise.

When Andy got home that night, she hid the USB drive in her sock drawer before sending Sam a brief email, letting him know she had something to pass along to him. She smiled at the thought it meant she would see him soon, even if only for a moment.