AN: apologies for not using the word 'rappelling' instead of 'abseiling' in the previous chapter. It had completely eluded me that abseiling is a UK term. Sorry if it puzzled you.

After everyone had wearily trooped back in following yet another emergency evacuation, Tony decided he would seek some peace and quiet in Autopsy. Ducky was universally popular in the Navy Yard but most people waited for him to visit them rather than seek him out in his kingdom. Ducky was always pleased to see visitors but the occupants of his table were not so obviously welcoming meaning it was usually a safe bet that Ducky and Jimmy would be the only (living) occupants of Autopsy. Usually Tony didn't mind being the centre of attention but the novelty was beginning to wear off. Besides, he remembered that he had been supposed to visit Ducky the previous day to get his leg strengthening exercises.

"Ah, Anthony," Ducky greeted him, "how nice to see you at last."

Tony opened his mouth to offer some excuse but Ducky swept on, "Mr Palmer, did I not say to you at frequent intervals yesterday, that I expected to see Special Agent DiNozzo momentarily?"

Jimmy, torn between two friends, decided to side with Ducky so he nodded while casting a sympathetic glance at Tony. Tony decided not to argue,

"Yes, I know, Ducky. I'm sorry."

"You are aware, are you not, of the importance of muscle and ligament care?"

"Yes, Ducky. McGee downloaded me some exercises from the internet," Tony said hopefully.

"Aahh, the internet. Well, that's all right then, isn't it? If the internet has told you what to do, you hardly need the advice of someone with decades of real experience, do you?"

"And Gibbs got me a cane," offered Tony.

"Indeed," Ducky's brogue was getting stronger as he began to enjoy himself, "well, that's a good thing, very sensible. And where is it? Mr Palmer, can you see Anthony's cane anywhere?"

"Well, actually, it's at home," Tony admitted, feeling as if he had just rolled over and shown his tummy to Ducky.

Ducky beamed, his point made; he went on to prescribe some exercises for Tony's leg and promised to sign him fit for field duty after the weekend so long as he followed Ducky's advice. Tony was suitably grateful and wondered if he might be invited to stay for a cup of tea to soothe his jangled nerves. It looked promising as Jimmy had put the kettle on and Ducky was an hospitable soul. Tony began to edge towards the desk where the tea things were laid out.

"I'm glad you came down, Anthony," said Ducky, "I had a very interesting parcel arrive today from my cousin in Aberdeen."

"What was that?" asked Tony, wondering if there might be some Dundee cake in the tin,

"A set of bagpipes."

Tony froze, "Bagpipes?"

"Yes, I was considered a rather fine player in my youth, you know," he smiled reminiscently, "I was wondering. Our duet went so well the other week, perhaps we could play another one. You on the piano and me on the bagpipes. What do you think?"

Tony could think of several things but was too polite to give them voice; chief among them was the thought that a piano/bagpipe duet would be an affront both to common sense and his sensitive eardrums. He remembered a pressing engagement.

"Love to stay and chat, Ducky but I've got to go and see the Director. You know, review the last few weeks. Got to go," and he backed out of the room.

"Oh dear, must you go?" asked Ducky in a concerned voice. By that time, Tony was at the door, "oh, let me know when you've finished with the Director, I have something for you." Tony nodded frantically and was gone.

"Dr Mallard," said Jimmy in a puzzled voice, "you said that your cousin Willie the Wheelman had sent you some candy. I didn't know he'd sent you bagpipes as well."

"He didn't, Mr Palmer," said Ducky in a steely voice, "but there's only enough shortbread in the tin for the two of us. Be a good lad and finish the brew."

Jimmy nodded in appreciation of the cunning tactics of his mentor.

NCISNCIS

Tony gathered some folders from his desk and went to see the Director. Vance's secretary waved him in with a sympathetic smile.

"DiNozzo, take a seat," said the Director in a business like tone, "it's been an interesting day so far."

"You have to admit, Sir, that NCIS has got an impressive record in speedy evacuations," said Tony optimistically.

"I'd rather it hadn't been achieved as a result of so much practice," said Vance drily.

Tony thought of apologising but then stopped himself; he couldn't really see that any of this was his fault. The Director was a fair man and he probably realised it wasn't anyone's fault either but he had decided to keep a watchful eye on Miss Clarke.

"So," he said, "let's talk about your time as Associate Deputy Director. Give me your impressions."

"It's certainly been interesting," began Tony. The Director nodded judiciously as he steepled his fingers beneath his chin, "I've been held at gunpoint, gassed and accused of being suicidal: all as a direct result of being ADD," Vance frowned, " and because I wasn't around to corral Agent Gibbs I was taken prisoner and nearly suffocated! Like I say, it's been interesting." He stared back at Leon.

The Director sighed but was determined to keep his temper, "some of what happened was unfortunate," he said, "but I'm sure there have been things you learned."

"Oh, yes!" said Tony with surprising enthusiasm, "I learned lots of things. It's was useful in a way to be stuck in the office with the chance to really observe what's going on. I found out where the Evidence clerks keep their stash of chocolate cookies, where Accounting go for their Thursday lunches, why Maintenance go through so many yellow Sharpies and why ..."

The Director had had enough although he now understood the anxieties of the department heads all those weeks before, "but did you learn anything of value?"

Tony seemed hurt, "haven't you always wondered why they need so many yellow Sharpies? I mean, it's so unlikely".

The Director was a master tactician, he played a winning hand,

"I still haven't had the report on your accident, Agent DiNozzo."

Tony gazed back at him with an innocent expression, "I fell down the stairs, Director,"

"You fell down the stairs?"

Tony shrugged, "What can I say? I'm clumsy."

"I find it hard to believe that a college athlete of your skill would be clumsy".

"On the sports field I'm surefooted like a panther or a ... or something else really surefooted but once I take those gym shoes off, then I just keep falling over," said Tony still looking the Director straight in the eye.

"Then perhaps you shouldn't take them off," suggested Leon.

Tony pretended to consider this, "But they wouldn't go with the suits, Director. And, besides, I think it would be against the dress code."

Vance remembered someone telling him that looking someone straight in the eye was the best way to tell a lie and he had a feeling that was a lesson DiNozzo had learned too. He decided to switch tactics,

"All right. If you don't want to discuss your achievements during your tenure of the ADD role, I'll tell you what I think." Tony shifted uncomfortably.

"You managed the Security conferences in an exemplary way. You organised the various receptions most efficiently. Your reports are thorough, detailed and insightful and will lead to NCIS being more efficient in some areas. I enjoyed working with you as a colleague."

Tony could lie to the Director's face but his face fell in embarrassment at this catalogue of praise.

"The reception stuff was just luck," he said, "if my aunt hadn't been there, it would have been quite different. And I just heard that my uncle is retiring from the Royal Navy so they won't be turning up at the Navy Yard again. SecNav is safe!"

"And the reports?" asked the Director flicking a finger at a pile of papers, "were they just luck too?"

"Sure," said Tony, "Captain Dickens did most of the work on the Agent Afloat ideas. I just wrote them down."

"Interesting," said Leon, "do you know why I thought of making you ADD?"

"I thought it was because you knew about my aunt and uncle, Sir."

"No. It was something that Captain Dickens wrote when I reassigned you off the Ronald Reagan. He's got a reputation as one of the commanders who would, shall we say, prefer not to have an Agent Afloat on board but he was furious when you were taken off. In his assessment of your rotation, he said that he knew you didn't want to be there but that you did your work with energy, commitment and in a whole hearted way. That intrigued me, Agent DiNozzo. You could have done the bare minimum and kept a low profile but you did that job properly and well."

Tony looked at his fingers and wondered if discussing a bagpipe duet with Ducky might not have been a better option.

"Anyone can do a job well if they enjoy it but you did that job well even though you hated it. And you've done the ADD job well too although I suspect you didn't want to do that either." Leon paused to see if Tony would say something but when he kept silent, Vance continued, "You know what I think, Agent DiNozzo? I think you have a fine work ethic and that you have a strong sense of duty. I guess that's why Agent Gibbs recruited you. What I don't understand is why you hide all this."

Tony shrugged his shoulders but still said nothing. Vance continued, "SecNav is impressed. He's talking of finding room in the budget to make your role permanent."

That got a reaction: a look of panic went across Tony's face. "Tell me why you think I should tell SecNav not to make it permanent. Because I have to tell you, I'm inclined to go along with him."

"Director," said Tony a little desperately, "perhaps I have done the work well but anyone could do the ADD stuff I've been doing but I'm good at being a field agent and I think I make a difference. And I enjoy it: I know I'll have to give it up one day but not yet."

The Director stared implacably back so Tony continued, "I'll admit that I enjoyed writing those reports and doing the organising but I enjoy being a field agent more. I'm a good agent and those are difficult to find: you're an efficient sort of person, Director, I'm sure you can appreciate the efficiency in having me doing a good job as a field agent."

The Director nodded and, sensing that he had won, Tony went on, "Besides, who else would want to be Gibbs' Senior Field Agent?"

Vance gave one of his rare bursts of laughter and Tony relaxed. The Director stood up, indicating that the interview was over,

"Associate Deputy Director DiNozzo," he said formally, "I thank you for your service. I will advise SecNav that your temporary post should not be made permanent," Tony smiled, "at this time," Vance continued, "but I think you will find a similar opportunity may present itself in the future and you may not be able to wriggle out of it then."

"Thank you, Director Vance," said Tony, "for letting me do the job ... and for letting me stop. There must be a movie like this somewhere."

The Director pointed to the door, "Go ... and see what your co-workers are up to."

Tony nodded and went to the door but the Director stopped him, "Stop. Why are they using so many yellow Sharpies?"

Tony turned back to enlighten him. When he had finally gone, the Director went back to his desk and switched his computer on. He searched through some files until he found what he was looking for: the security tapes for the day of DiNozzo's accident. They had taken some finding; he suspected the hand of Miss Scuito or McGee but they hadn't dared erase them and he had found them in the end. He called for a cup of coffee and once it had arrived, settled himself down to solve a puzzle which had irked him for weeks.

What the Director saw:

Ducky, Palmer, Tim, Abby and Ziva were huddled at the bottom of the stairs in the squad room. They seemed to be engrossed in some small objects on the floor. Every now and then, a hand was raised in triumph or despair. After a few minutes he saw Tony trotting down the steps. He paused about four steps from the bottom and looked in interest at the scene beneath him; he seemed to say something and the others looked up and laughed. Seconds later, Agent Gibbs came racing down, he stopped a step above Tony and delivered a head slap! Tony, taken by surprise, tried to turn to see what was happening and he did so, lost his footing and tumbled down where he lay in a crumpled heap.

The Director sat back. He now knew what had happened but he wasn't sure why, although he could see why DiNozzo had kept silent.

NCISNCIS

Meanwhile Tony had gone back to the squad room where the others were discussing their 360˚ training; he felt a sense of relief at having escaped from one of his jobs but, at the back of his mind, thought he would need to consider the implications of what the Director had said to him about his future at NCIS.

He didn't have much time to think because Ducky soon arrived with Jimmy. Abby trailed in afterwards.

"Ah, Anthony, I'm glad to have found you. Has the Director released you from your exalted duties?"

"You see before you a free man," said Tony. A sigh of relief went through the room as they glimpsed a return to normal. Gibbs' hand twitched as he suppressed a wish to welcome Tony back with a head slap.

"Anthony," said Ducky slightly uncomfortably, "I would feel happier if you would take custody of these," and he handed a bag to Tony. It clinked as he took it, he looked inside and laughed.

The others came over to look and they laughed too as they remembered the last time they had seen the contents of the bag.

Flashback

Tony and Gibbs were in MTAC when Ducky and Jimmy came for a visit.

"Hello, Ducky," said Ziva, "what can we do for you?"

"Ziva, it is what I can do for you! Tell me, did you play marbles as a child in Israel?"

"I do not think so," said Ziva.

"I have!" said Tim excitedly, "I was quite a champion!"

"And so was I," said Ducky, "and today, I received a parcel from one of my cousins in Scotland. Look, it's the marbles we played with all those years ago. And I find I have a yearning to play again."

"We could play now," said Tim eagerly. It wasn't often that he thought he could excel in a game which didn't involve a mouse but he knew he could give most people a run for their money at marbles.

"I'm not sure," hesitated Ziva, "what will Gibbs say?"

"They'll be hours yet, Ziva," assured Tim, and thinking of a chink in Ziva's armour, said, "it's a very competitive game, tactics are very important."

Ziva succumbed. "I will call Abby. She would not wish to be excluded and she is, after all, good at bowls."

And so it was that the MCRT plus Abby, Ducky and Jimmy whiled their time away with a game of marbles. Ziva picked up the technique quickly but found that Ducky and Tim had superior tactics. They were all so absorbed that Tony's voice from above took them by surprise,

"What you doing? Someone stolen a stash of glass eyes?"

Abby replied, "they're not glass eyes, Tony. They're Ducky's old game of marbles and they're beautiful!" She picked one up to a wail of protest from Tim,

"Abby! You're ruining the game!"

"Well, you'd better pack up, my friends, before the Boss catches you fiddling while Rome burns," said Tony.

"I did not know that Rome is on fire," said Ziva seriously, "Did you hear about it in MTAC?"

Everyone laughed and Jimmy started to explain. At that moment, Gibbs made his appearance,

"DiNozzo, what are you doing? Get back to work!"

Tony turned to explain but the head slap caught him unawares and he fell to the bottom of the stairs scattering the marbles in the process.

"Ow," he said, "ow."

Present day

"I feel it would be safer for you to have these, Anthony," said Ducky, "keep temptation from us."

Tony shook his head, "Ducky, these are your childhood memories, you should keep them. I'm sure we're safe now."

"No, I insist," said Ducky, "but perhaps you would let me have a look at them sometimes?"

"OK," said Tony, "on one condition."

"Which is?" asked Ducky.

"That I don't have to play a duet with you on the bagpipes."

"Agreed," said Ducky happily.

"Actually, Tony," began Jimmy, "Dr Mallard hasn't actually got a ..."

"Come along, Mr Palmer," interrupted Ducky, "let these good people get back to their work."

"But ..." protested Jimmy. He got no further as Ducky tugged at his arm. Unfortunately Jimmy lost his balance, as he began to fall he grabbed hold of the edge of Tony's desk and pushed the bag of marbles on to the floor. "I'm so sorry," he said, as he began to reach down to pick them up.

"It's all right, I'll get them," said Tony. He stood up from his chair and started to chase a marble that had escaped. Unfortunately he wasn't wearing his gym shoes so he wasn't as steady as a panther or some other surefooted creature. He trod on a marble and crashed to the ground.

"Ow," he said, "ow!"

"Tony," "Anthony!" "DiNozzo!" came a variety of voices. The other people on the floor looked up in interest.

Ducky and Gibbs got there first.

"Anthony, have you hurt your leg again?"

"No, my leg's fine."

"Thank heaven," breathed Ducky.

"But my arm doesn't feel so good."

EPILOGUE

Gibbs and Ducky took Tony to the hospital where a broken right arm was diagnosed and a plaster cast applied.

The team, minus Tony, assembled on Monday.

"Where's DiNozzo?" asked Gibbs, "I thought you were driving him in, Tim?"

"Er, I was, but he phoned me to say you were bringing him in, Boss."

"No," said Gibbs, "I offered but he said you were nearer. Must be some mistake, Call him."

"That won't be necessary," said the Director making one of his stealthy Gibbs-like appearances, "Agent DiNozzo won't be here for a while."

"You got him doing some Di-rector work again, Leon?" drawled Gibbs, "he told me about that, you know."

"Agent DiNozzo has decided to take some time off while his arm heals," continued the Director as if Gibbs hadn't spoken.

"But Tony never takes time off," said Abby.

"His Aunt Caroline heard of his injury and invited him to visit her in the UK while he recuperates. He decided to accept," explained Vance.

"Tony's in England?" wailed Abby, "but that's so far away! Bert will miss him!"

"I'm sure that Agent DiNozzo took that into account when he made his decision, Miss Scuito. Nevertheless, his words to me were that he thought he'd be safer in England. For some reason he thinks his last tenure as ADD was a bit too ... er ... eventful."

The others nodded understandingly.

The Director turned to go but then changed his mind,

"Dr Mallard,"

"Yes, Director?"

"I think it would be best if you gave me the bag of marbles. I will put them somewhere safe."

"Quite right, Director, quite right," said Ducky humbly.

AN: The end ... at last! Thank you to everyone who came along for the ride! I forgot to say earlier that I don't own the NCIS characters – and they're probably very relieved that I don't!