TG: i just can't do this online shit forever man

You deleted that conversation a long time ago.

TG: i love you so fucking much and

You believed him and loved him back.

TG: the other day i just felt so fucking trapped

That's why you let him go immediately.

GT: i'll never not love you, dave. you're everything to me and i would have done anything to save this. but i respect that you'll be a lot happier without me.

They were saved, all your online chats with Dave in the month you were dating, into an unnamed folder. You didn't really think any much of it besides the fact that maybe you'll bring it out and laugh at it one day, because the online chat history definitely had to go.

You didn't talk to Dave for a week or two after that, wanting to give him some space, and maybe the number of that hot guy (okay fine you're a bit bitter about that). Honestly, like the relationship, you'd expected your friendship with him to end soon, too. Not only with Dave, but also with Rose and Jade.

They didn't. The four of you talked to each other practically everyday and never stopped. Gradually as you all matured into adults the heartache passed and you were able to talk to Dave without feeling like a part of you melted down everytime he made you laugh and smile. You don't think the attraction ever passed, but at least you fell out of love. It was a relief, to finally talk to him like a best bro and nothing more, because that's all you'll ever be.

That was kind of before you met him and fell in love. All over again.

He's sitting in front of you in the reception table and chuckling next to his boyfriend.

Your name is John Egbert and you're feeling a bit melancholy.

CG: THAT SOUNDS TOUGH. I WANT TO ENCOURAGE YOU TO GO FOR YOUR MAN BUT IT'S NOT LIKE I WANT TO TEAR HIM AWAY FROM HIS CURRENT FLAME. SHIT'S NOT RIGHT.

EB: i know, thanks anyway, karkat! and i'm fiiiiiiiine! it's just a stupid old crush that came back, i think it's because i seriously liked him, you know? and they say that you never forget your first love, so i guess crushing on him again is a bit of a throwback.

CG: I GUESS THAT'S NORMAL.

EB: of course!

CG: BUT THIS SITUATION IS STILL SHITTY FOR YOU.

EB: yeah, i guess. but i don't really want to turn it into an issue, because it's not!

CG: YEAH AND YOU FEEL LIKE THIS ISSUE'S JUST GROWING BIGGER.

EB: ugh, you're right. and tomorrow we have boring and fancy soiree that jade's organized, too. i don't really feel like going there and seeing him cuddling with 'chuck'.

CG: THE FACT THAT YOU FEEL LIKE PUTTING THE NAME CHUCK IN QUOTATIONS SAYS FUCKING LOADS ABOUT YOUR ISSUE. WHY DON'T YOU HIDE BEHIND YOUR PANSY FEMALE FRIENDS FOR THE DAY TOMORROW.

EB: they love talking about dave and that guy! i'm always playing that smirking friend with rose and jade towards dave's current relationship. jade and rose are really cool and i love talking and spending time with them but not when every ten minutes one of them brings up something about that guy!

CG: AND THEY DIDN'T NOTICE YOUR DORKASS CRINGING?

EB: i don't cringe, karkat. besides, rose is bringing along this other girl. i think it's a different girl than last time.

CG: HOW COME THAT ROSE FRIEND OF YOURS IS DROWNING IN MORE GIRLS THAN ME, AND I'M POURING MY SOUL HERE TO GET AT LEAST ONE GIRL TO NOTICE ME AND I'M JUST FAILING?

EB: dude, no one can compare to rose. it'll just make you depressed, trust me. apparently she's the "right amount of elegant and silliness" that makes every vagina in the room melt or something.

CG: THAT IS THE MOST SEXIST THING I'VE HEARD YOU SAY. EVER.

EB: what the fuck?

CG: YOU'RE OBJECTIFYING WOMEN AS VAGINAS. IN CASE YOU HAVEN'T NOTICED THAT SMALL MISDEMEANOR, BUT LIKE FUCK I'M GOING TO RAG ON THE INJUSTICES OF THAT STATMENT. I'M JUST SAYING THAT YOU SOUND MORE FRUSTATED THAN USUAL.

EB: you've been spending more time with your cousin kankri, haven't you?

CG: FUCK! HE'S BEEN RUBBING OFF ON ME! THE BASTARD!

EB: hehehe, that's alright! you sound pretty cool when you're talking about social justice. hey, i have an idea!

CG: WHATEVER IT IS, NO.

EB: come with me tomorrow! it's the day before jade goes off to explore the world and expand the skaianet company again.

CG: LOOK, I DON'T FEEL LIKE GOING ON A FANCY SOIREE OR WHATEVER WITH YOUR FRIENDS OKAY? THEY ALL MAKE ME FEEL UNCOMFORTABLE.

EB: karkat come on, they're the best people on the planet!

CG: RIGHT. IT'LL STILL BE UNCOMFORTABLE. LALONDE IS THE BIG WIG IN LITERATURE, HARLEY SINGLEHANDEDLY STARTED UP SKAIANET, AND STRIDER'S FILMS MAKE ME WANT TO BRAIN SOMEONE. AND THERE WILL BE OTHER BIGWIGS, I'M JUST A COLLEGE GUY PART TIMING IN PIZZA HUT.

EB: even if you put it like that, you're still fine with me!

CG: THAT'S BECAUSE YOU'RE A HUGE GOOFBALL WHO APPRECIATES THE SAME KIND OF PIZZA THAT I DO.

EB: i don't really like pizza.

CG: EXACTLY. AND YOU'RE JUST YOU, OKAY? YOU'RE ALWAYS SUPPORTING ME AND ENCOURAGING ME ALONG, EVEN THOUGH WE'RE LIKE DAY AND NIGHT. AND EVERYTHING YOU DO IT'S LIKE YOU'RE FUCKING DIDDLING AROUND LIKE A TOY WHEN YOU'RE NOT.

EB: aaww, karkat

CG: DON'T AWWW KARKAT ME.

EB: but that's so sweet! and don't just count yourself down as the part timer as pizza hut, dude. you're, like, continuing my dream as a biologist before i decided to work with jade at skaianet. but come on, i'm asking you pleeeeaaaase!

CG: FINE.

EB: :D

CG: OH SHUT UP WITH THAT!

EB: :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D

CG: ASDFASDFASSA

EB: :B

Chuck had an easy way of making Dave chuckle that you're incredibly jealous of. You don't even know why, because you know you can make Dave laugh even harder, but talking to him became more and more painful, until everytime you two speak you could feel yourself forcing a smile that's breaking your jaws. You try to talk a lot, in order to make it less visible your traitorous feelings, and you make sure to laugh a lot. Sometimes when it seemed like you can't take it anymore you flopped onto Jade and let her pet your hair until you felt normal again.

On the day of the party you arrived at Karkat's dingy house in your suit and his in tow (a college guy forced to work at Pizza Hut's doesn't have the kind of cash for suits, but luckily you are pretty loaded and decided to just buy a suit Karkat's size and loan it to him once in a while). Knocking on the comically decrepit door produced a surly faced and crying Karkat, all packed up with food and water. You didn't ask about the open 50 First Dates disk packet you saw right next to a television.

You open up your arms and let him dry his tears on your jacket.

Your name is Dave Strider and you should be having the time of your life. You've finally met the three of the most important people of your life, and even found out that John and Rose are staying in L.A. to work. That means that you can hang out with them. Yeah! And the four of you were having a lot of fun. Loads. You've brought Chuck, your boyfriend, over to several events before Jade goes off, and he had integrated pretty well into the group. It was much better talking to them in person instead of just online, everything seemed more real. When the four of you first met up at a Hollywood fundraiser, you couldn't believe your eyes although the four of you had known already that this was happening.

You gave John the long overdue tender bro embrace and he returned it, lifting you up and then going on to lift Rose up too.

"My favorite people in the world!" He had exclaimed back then.

Despite how comfortable the atmosphere you usually found the four of you to be in, at moments John would look strained or seem to be trying too hard to be happy. You didn't press him about this, but since Jade's leaving the next day after the party, John won't have his customary cuddle buddy anymore so you decided to corner him in the soiree about this. Chuck won't be there because he's an actor and had a schedule conflict, so he just gave you a kiss and told you to have fun.

Fun was what you were planning on having while you stand next to an ironic punch bowl Jade had been persuaded into placing. She voted down your suggestions for even more ironic highschool prom streamers and decided that the over decorated punch bowl was the only tacky piece of hot irony that's allowed.

That's when you met Karkat Vantas. Well, saw him anyway. Technically you heard him first.

"Look, I'm fucking sorry for spilling my drink on your pretentious dress, but you could be less of a fucking menopausal jackal's ass about this!"

"What- how dare you-you uncultured and barbaric-"

You turn in the direction of the turmoil just in time to see John easily wrapping an arm around a short and furious kid's waist.

"Sorry about my date, Mrs. Fischer! He's a bit of a klutz, you can send the dry cleaning bill to me later, and we can find another gown for you right away!"

You've never believed in hate at first sight until the image of Karkat firmly pressed against John's side came into the world.

You swallow and take a sip of punch.