For the Love of Conner

Disclaimer: I own nothing. Sadly.

Chapter 1

He hated Mondays. The mountain was empty. Quiet. With the team gone, all Superboy had for company was the silent hallways. Mondays, he is always afraid to leave his room. But he does. He doesn't want to stay in his room. But he doesn't want to wander the base like a drone. He does it anyway because it's better than staying still. It's better than waiting for someone to give him an order. It reminds him of Cadmus. He hates being reminded of Cadmus but everything does. He doesn't think about Superman. He forces himself to think of anything else but Superman. He thinks of how quiet it is.

Tuesday isn't much different. Except he goes into the training room and breaks. He hits the punching bags, the wall, and jumps and makes craters. He does it just to move, to hear anything other than the infuriating silence echoing between his ears. He does it to keep the burning in his eyes at bay. Superboy knows Canary will show up the next day and remind him that he shouldn't train without supervision. He knows she will not raise her voice but there isn't any way for her to hide the disappointment from her face. It's a look that makes his insides feel cold. He promises to try harder. He knows it's a lie. What isn't a lie is the promise he makes to himself that he will try to last longer than one day. He knows he will follow that promise for a little while then break all over again.

Canary comes in Wednesday and he wants to worship the ground she walks on. He knows she won't be happy but she gives him something he desperately needs, a sound. He doesn't really hear a word she says. He hears the words, her heart beat. He hears her steady pace as she makes her way across the room or down the hall. She makes lunch. She tells him to leave the base. To go outside because it will be good for him but he doesn't believe her. He feels bad for that. The problem is that he doesn't know why.

Then she leaves and the burning in his eyes comes back. So Superboy goes to the closet in his room, and bites down on a fist. He bites as hard as he can, until a strange copper taste trickles down his throat and the burning stops. His hand heals not long after and it's like nothing happened at all. Sometimes he wishes they wouldn't. Thursday and Friday go by in a haze. He doesn't remember anything other than the color of the walls and the echo of his own heartbeat.

But Saturday the base seems to wake up. His head becomes full and his stomach starts to feel lighter and lighter. Miss Martin smiles at him and asks him about his week. He lies. He tells her it was fine. He can keep her out of his head now so he doesn't feel bad about it. But he thinks he is supposed to. He can't find it in himself to care. He is just glad she's here and she brings something back. He isn't sure he knows what that is just yet. He's just glad it's there.

Artemis and Robin come in while Miss Martin is in the kitchen. He stays on the couch and waits for his hearing to overwhelm him. He doesn't mind this time. He doesn't hear what they say, not a word, all he knows is how glad he can feel them. Every part of them seems to be bursting at the seams. A part of him relaxes for the first time all week. They haven't changed out of their civilian identities just yet. He doesn't mind. They're here and he doesn't think he's going crazy.

Kaldur comes in after. He reminds Superboy a lot of the ocean the teen calls home. He makes Superboy feel calm. He focuses on Kaldur for several minutes. He listens to the slow tread of the team leader's feet, confident in a way that the clone envies. The atlantian's heart thunders in his head. It blocks out everything else. It pushes out the other things, the things Superboy it's sure of. Then he wants to go outside.

When Kid Flash arrives, it's with a rush of wind and a yell. Superboy likes Kid the most because every part of the speedster is loud. Not one inch of the red head is silent. It was like being in the same room as a bee hive, buzzing and humming without stop. Superboy relaxes into the couch, and feels tired. He doesn't remember the last time he slept. But with the team here he doesn't want to sleep, doesn't want to miss spending time with them.

"Hey Conner!" Kid is loud. Superboy looks up at the speedster and nods his head. Conner was his new name. They called him Conner now. He tried to remember that. He had a name now. He was more than a clone the team told him. Some days he believed that. Some days he didn't.

"I got something for ya' buddy." The yellow clad hero shows the clone a DVD case. The only thing Conner makes out is a yellow dinosaur before the case is taken out of his sight.

"It's this really popular show in Japan." Kid fiddles with the dvd player. "But I figured we mix things up."

"So you bring a cartoon? Great idea Baywatch." Artemis doesn't miss her chance.

"Hey! They have a card game too!" Conner can hear parts of Kid humming, "Besides we gotta show Conner stuff besides school stuff."

"Perhaps it would benefit us all to see what other cultures view as entertainment." Kaldur's voice falls over everyone. It's a peaceful tremble.

Eventually, everyone settles around the tv. There is popcorn and it fills the room. It makes the mountain less empty. It reminds him that people do exist. They are real. They aren't figments of his imagination. The others chatter throughout the show. They only see a few episodes before they are called in for training. They go through more covert training and Conner focuses all his attention on the team, on the training. He doesn't think about the after, about when they leave. He memorizes every gesture, every word, engraves them in his head.

One by one they leave. They go to the part of their lives that don't include him. Robin tells him not to get in trouble and laughs on his way to the zeta beam. Artemis warns him away from her room but she doesn't look angry so the clone thinks she must be teasing. She likes to do that. Miss Martin reminds him that there are leftovers in the frig. Her cheeks color and he knows that means something but the only thing that he's focused on is that everyone is leaving. Kaldur tells him to make sure to rest and rest a hand on his shoulder. He expects Kid Flash to joke about having the mountain to himself except something different happens.

"Here. These are for you." He gives Conner a pack of cards. "They're from the show. It's different so you might like it. But you gotta give it a try. Ok?"

Kid's eye are big and full. That's the way they look to Conner. So he takes the cards.

"Ok." His voice is rough. He doesn't like how mean he sounds. But Kid doesn't look hurt. So maybe he sounds better. He gives the clone a wide smile. Then he's alone again and it he's cold all over. He feels like the mountain is trying to swallow him. But the cards are warm in his hands. So he goes back to the couch and sleeps there. He holds the cards close and dreams.

When he wakes up he doesn't remember what he dreamed of but he feels warm. The clone sits up and starts the dvd player. He starts the show from the beginning. He puts the volume up and lets the voices fill the base. Now that he's paying attention, he can't look away. The gnomes didn't show him anything like this. It was like he was seeing the moon all over again.

When the first dvd ends, he opens the card pack and is careful not to bend them. They're still warm and he wants to keep them close. He gets up to hunt for something to hold them. It takes him a while but he eventually finds a belt with a few pouches. One is just right for the cards. He wears the belt and goes back to watch the rest of the show. He picks up the case and reads the title out loud.

"Digimon." When the word leaves his mouth, his entire body feels warm. There is a faint hum in his ears. Conner sits down and watches the rest. He wonders. When it's over he plays it again. He sees the digimon and he sees the children. The two worlds fit together despite how different they are. He wishes. His eyes begin to burn and he doesn't stop them.

He thinks of Superman and a part of Conner dies. He wishes. Hard and deep. His face is wet and Conner doesn't know why. A part of his mind gives the answer but he ignores it. He wishes for love and acceptance. Unconditionally. And for an eternal moment, he believes in the power of wishes. He believes in the things of children, of powers beyond Superman and Batman and Cadmus. He wishes he was anywhere else. He wishes he could believe forever.

"Conner." The clone looks up. There is static on the tv. He listens for the sound of an intruder. He doesn't hear anything. He is alone.

"Conner." The voice called out again. Young and hopeful. It pulled at the hybrid. Urged him to move closer and then the air in front of him glowed. The living room faded away. The teen hero didn't notice. Conner reached out. Static filled the air.

"I'm here Conner." The glow began to form a body. What emerged was a purple furry dinosaur. Its head reach the hybrids waist. It had black claws with white feet and hands. The tip of its tail, its stomach and nose was also white. On its back was a pair of bat wings and its forehead had a red upside down ruby triangle. Perched on its head was a pair of cat-like ears and gold eyes.

"Conner. I've been waiting for you." His voice abandoned him. His vision was blinded by another glow and when his vision cleared, something-D-Arc, a voice whispered-was in his hand. It was all purple with a white border around the screen and a white strap. He held the digivice out infront of him and when he did, a holo-screen appeared with the image of the creature in front of him. Underneath a picture was the name, Dorumon, and beneath that was the label, rookie.

"I won't leave you Conner." Dorumon's voice is mature and male. His voice is soft, a touch rough and not one would match with such a small digimon. But his eyes are honest. His hands shake and for a moment, he's afraid that he's hallucinating. Then he hears it. Beneath his harsh breathing, is a tempo, a beat. It's not his heart. It's Dorumon's. So he reaches out again and his fingers touch flesh and fur. The digimon purrs. Conner falls to his knees. He takes the digimon into his arms and cries. He knows he's crying and the rookie in his arms runs his head against his neck to comfort his new tamer.

"We're in this together Conner. Always." The light fades away and the world emerges. But it's not the world Conner remembers. Tamer and digimon were surrounded by the dirt and rock. Above them, a green and blue orb floated with pink spires shooting away from it. He pulled away.

"Where are we?" His voice is dry and rough

"We're in the digital world. You didn't like that place you called me from right?" Dorumon cocked his head to the side slightly. "So I brought you here. Do you feel better now?"

"I don't know. Why…?" Conner looked the digimon in the eyes.

"We're partners. I'm your friend. You're my Tamer. I rely on you to become stronger and I protect you. We care for each other. You were hurting so I did what I thought would make you feel better."

"Care…for each other?" Conner's voice becomes low. Dorumon nods his head. Then nuzzles his head in Conner's neck, purring from deep inside and Conner wraps both arms around the smaller digimon and holds him close.

"Together." The hero tamer whispers, belief cemented.

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