I know that this is rather late but I noticed that he
didn’t know MadEye

This started off in fourth year so he would know who MadEye was

If Harry is no longer part of magical Britain, why would he need a magical guardian? And wouldn't his trust vault get folded back into the family vault as it is a vault for his magical schooling which he is no longer attending and thus is not needed for Harry and wouldn't the main vault(s) go into lockdown until Harry has a magical descendant? Why isn't anybody asking why Dumbledore needs access to Harry's trust vault when it again is supposed to be for Harry while going to a magical school in the magical world when that is no longer happening?

Great work as always

This was ok.

Good job kid :) yes lots of mistakes but don't give up your stories already have lots of potential.

One thing I've never understood is why people criticize fanfiction authors for not following the books. It's fanfiction if you want it exactly like the books there is no point to doing any of it. Stick with the published works and be done with it.

LarLar

Dumbass read the books Ginny was not looking at Harry with lust in the 4 th book you are one of the retards that did not read the books and understand what you read Harry liked Ginny since the 3 rd book stupid dumbass

well i'd give your story a rating of 5 for spelling, 5 for so many mistakes, a 10 for a good idea and overall a 4. There are resources like the the harry potter lexicon to fix your mistakes that you made overall.

Sirius is his godfather not grandfather
Hedwick is Hedwig
Daily Profit is Daily Prophet

Just to name a few mistakes you made in more then ten chapters

Monbade

hedwig not hedwick

Well one good story, as spected another moronic one

I like the plot and the general storyline, however there are qtmuite a few spelling and grammar errors especially with names. While auto spell check can find some, it would be nice to at least proof read before uploading. sure there may still be errors after that, but you will minimize errors that way. Also, some parts of the story does not transition as smoothly and at times can be very choppy. The story overal is still pretty good and I am willing to read the rest.

You kept referring to Sirius as Harry's grandfather instead of his godfather. I stopped reading your story. There are just too many grammatical and plot errors for me to enjoy the story. You need a beta to keep the story on track.

it's always nice to see someone rewrite fics as good as MY IMMORTAL in grammar and vocabulary. the plot is passable if it wasn't for all the stupidity ,errors and wrong names .

He got Daphnie back in the end. The story was excellent too

Another good story.

Good story, although it's now patently clear - from this story and "Why Me, AGAIN?" - why, in some stories, Harry refers to himself as "Fate's chew-toy." The abuse heaped upon him by the "higher powers" in his world makes that inflicted by Voldemort, DumDum, the Dursleys, and Snape seem like little pranks. Heck, just being forced to spend time with your version of Hermione is cruel.

I have noticed that your version of Ron is quite disgusting. I'm trying to figure out if you really dislike the character or if you simply detest bad table manners and are making his even worse than book Ron to make a point about the importance of good breeding.

I'm glad to see that your McGonagall, while supportive of DumDum, is willing to call him on bad decisions and even stands up to Snape. I love when she chews DD out in Gaelic, something I suspect she has often wanted to do over the years for his mishandling of Harry.