This continues to be one of my fav works of yours. Well written action and angst, always a good combo. A few missing commas here and there but that's easily improved on. Funny thing, I have always wondered how the turtles would fair against more "realistic" weapons lol.
BTWs, random question maybe, but what incarnation is this fic in? 2k3 or 2k12? Or did you leave it purposefully ambiguous and up to your readers' interpretation?

That this story has more chapters...I really wanna read about Raph's pov and Mikey's pov and Leo's recovery for what he went through and also about if he has brain damage with all the time he was dead...please. Think about it? Please? It's for that reason I marked follow ;P

Betty, oh my gosh. This was so intense and the medical terminology had me amazed! I loved this so much! Thanks for writing! :D

Wow this was a good story. I understood some of those terms but most of them I didn't. Man Don has the toughest job out of all his brothers. At least he was able to save Mikey and Leo. You did a good job with this story.

I really liked this. It was very suspenseful and I appreciated all of the medical terminology and accuracy. It is always such a treat when an author takes the time to be as accurate as you were here. Plus, since it was Donatello's POV, it was totally believable to have him rattle things off like a walking medical anthology!

Very nicely done. The plot was very solid, it was riveting and suspenseful, and your writing was very nicely done!

more please

Holy crap that was so intense. I think I held my breath through the entire read. I loved the way you kept dialogue out of it. In a way, this style really added to the effect. Almost like a rapid-fire report of what was happening. In lesser hands it would have come across as too much "telling" and not enough "showing" but you handled it with expert care and left us with something more exciting and nerve-wracking.

That last line was perfect. I think you ended it at the best possible point. I know for me, I gasped and found I could breathe again after that final line. Great job!

Now, as for the precision with the medical terms. It may have been a bit much for some readers - but let me explain - I think for this style it fit rather nicely, so I wouldn't necessarily change it here. Now, if you are writing a more traditional story with full on descriptions, I would not hesitate to explain not only the name of the situation, but go into some detail as to what it MEANS - for instance, here, hemothorax can be stated and left - in a different story, I would want you to say, perhaps: A hemothorax? Where the ...go into detail, explaining the dire nature of the situation that that word means...something along that line.

My preference is usually not in favor of too heavily medically filled stories as I find I like to look up words I don't know, I rather enjoy that - but if there are too many medical precise words, then I sort of get a bit lost and don't want to make a list of things to look up, lol

That being said, as long as you give us readers contextual clues and maybe some description of what the terms mean and what they could lead to, thus making us understand Don's fright even better, I think you'd be fine. I know there are a TON of people who love the more procedural dramas where you get into all the facets of medical emergencies and stuff, so you should be in no short supply of readers. XD

I really enjoyed this story. I do have a suggestion though, do an epilogue! I would LOVE to see what would happen when Leo and Mikey wake up! That being said, this story is still amazing!

You got this from The Fool? Haha really? OMG this is so much better than The Fool! I actually feel kinda honored that you got a kick ass idea like this from my story! Lol
I liked the choppy sentences. I like how Leo's thought were quick and to the point. I liked all of his thoughts and the way he was trying to assess the situation, make a plan, be a leader when BAM! Raph takes it upon himself to charge! I guess it's true, no plan survives contact with the enemy, or hotheaded brothers (uhhh, that's how it goes right? Haha)
Anyways, I really did like this. There were a lot of quotables in here. I also love the fact that there wasn't any dialogue! You know, I never really realized until you told me about how so many fics are literally only the characters talking back as forth! and no detail on anything else! Like, it's so easy writing people talking, we talk all the time - every day. The hard part is writing details, and there my friend, is where you excel. The details were amazing and I love how good and true-to-real you are. It's very beleivable!
There needs to be another chapter. With redemption! Come on, the guys need some payback. They need to find that SOB with the gun and put the guy in his place - ninja turtle style! Like, that sniper could be anywhere - show up anywhere! He's a threat that needs to be neutralized. Also, some good brother fluff is never a bad thing. :)
-Hannah Lynn

yay! Leo's alive. You definantly need to do a part 2. Leo's Recovery!

That was really cool, I love near tragedy fics.

Whoa. What a story. I'm glad Leo survived though as I was worried he wouldn't. I can see why Don would be frantic and wanting to save his brother's life. Nicely done on this, Betty. I loved it.

The Bubbly One,
Shell

Sheesh, that was some intense writing, but what a great premise you had! I can't believe they used Mikey to get to the others. What a low blow, his brothers would’ve gone crazy! (and darn it, where are those ninja smoke bombs when you need them!? See Mikey, this is why you don't waste that stuff messing around!) Good thing Leo and Don were there to save the day. You had me on the ropes when Leo’s heart stopped, I didn’t think you’d kill him but still I was like “Leo NOOOO! Your bros NEEEED YOU!” I hope you keep writing, I love reading good thriller/action fics like this one. Great job!

EEK! Love, love, loved it! Even more awesome than I was hoping it would be. Great job! I liked that you stuck with the no dialogue- I thought it really added to the frantic tone you had.

I liked the scenario you set up. I love the first half- you had Leo down VERY well! His thought processes were great. I felt like cringing along with them when they had to listen to Mikey's screams for that long. :( my poor Mikey!

And Donnie just... amazes me. That's all. :D The guy has mad skills and it's mind-blowing how cool he can be under such pressure. Poor guy, though!

Loved the last couple of lines too, they were so simple and wrapped it up nicely- the sound of Leo's heartbeat, and Don starting to cry. Ugh, the feels. So glad he lived!

Loved it! :D

Wow this was so intense. I loved it. For a moment, I really thought that Leo died, but when Don felt his pulse, I took a deep breath.
Great work! (:
xx