This was damn good

Well, Qunari have a 'strange way' to look at females. According to what I remember there are some females in the army and troops, but they aren't considered females anymore then, they are considered males since fighting and such is a thing a man does, at least to the Qunari. Therefore I suspect that Tallis, because of her abilities and her being a convert, is actually seen as a 'man' by the Qunari. The Qunari are often enough a matter of discussion, some favour them, some don't. Some think they are beasts, some think their religion gives them a better course/a new goal/a place (see Tallis).

Anyway, it's definitely a very interesting read about Kirkwall, the mages, the templers, Carver, Gamlen, Meredith, Orsino and the Qunari.

...
So at one point, a human married a dwarf?
O.o

A great story.

nice interpretation of DA2, it would be cool to see what hawke got up to in tevinter though

I love your stories so much, they are thought provoking and highly educational about storytelling and plot holes. As I hope someday to be a published writer I find reading your stories to be very helpfel, it reminds me constantly to remember to keep track of the consequences of everything, and to think as far ahead as possible to the varying implications.

Good story, thoroughly believable. While it's understandable from a gaming perspective, it does shatter one's suspension of disbelief somewhat when Mage!Hawke openly lays waste to bandits on the streets with blood magic and suffers no ill consequences for it. I am curious about your opinion of Orsino. In the game, he seemed very decent up until the contrived reveal and fight, and I'm not sure what to think of him. He seems a wasted character of sorts. Anyway, I your DA fiction is really top-notch. Now to finish reading Victory at Ostagar...

That was amazing. Very well written and accurate. I have never played Mage!Hawke myself, but just knowing the looks the knight commander gives you when you're merely a rogue makes the idea that she leaves you alone as a Mage very implausible! Well done!

Brilliant, a little tragic and very plausible. Bravo.

Excellent. Real, real, really real. I followed one of your reviews here. Glad I did. I guess you already know you're good. Now I know it too.

And this has many of the reasons why I don't play as a mage. Not very believable, and therefore, hard to immerse in for RPing. Yes, they'd not be roaming about, flaunting their magic. And in her case, she has more tastes of freedom than most mages, so it is particularly heart-breaking. i also think her family's reactions and her lack of interest in said reactions was depicted well. I loved the mention of menstruation having an effect on magic too. Clever, that. And she is wise to stick with Varric and no one else really. Though this has some serious threads of sadness and isolation, I did feel like by the end, she'd come to terms with her lot in life - well, before the end really - as best she could, and chose to move on and make a better future for herself, damn everyone else.

Interesting one shot, this Hawke is naturally far more likable, if only because life is continuously screwing her over and we see her dealing with it very admirably. I would like to read more about this Hawke's adventures in Tevinter, actually, if you want to continue this at any time but it works magnificently as a stand alone too.

What always disturbed me about this Mage-Templar dynamic, was that the mages are undeniably far superior in combat than Templars and they should be able to overthrow them quite easily as long as they have the moment of surprise but I guess they are too beaten down to do that, even though the PC mages are all rather dynamic and capable. Don't think it would have been hard to rally a circle if they had a charismatic enough leader to sway them. And by the time other templar's arrive, they could have left the circle and seeing that they phials full with their blood are there, they could have destroyed them. And even if they weren't 50 mages are a frightening number, one that the slow templars wouldn't be able to catch up with, since they would need twice that number to actually fight them.

Anyway, thank you for sharing this, am looking forward to more.

This is brilliant, in so many ways. I finally got around to reading it and I probably should have waited to review because I hardly know what to say about it. (Then again, if I wait, it could be weeks before I review. -_-;;;)

I like your Arabella. I like the detached, rational way that she is able to deconstruct her family, companions, and enemies.

As for Qunari female mages- perhaps they are hidden amongst the males and simply not considered to be female? That's the implication that Sten gave me when he had that interchange with Leliana. Given that they also see mages as "defective", I imagine they're excluded from the breeding program.

As for blood magic- well. It's also possible that the Qunari don't know all that much about the mechanics of it. Somehow I don't see them as all that willing to study it in detail. Yes, they've probably got reams of research on Tevinter, magic, mages, and the like, but given how they seem to see "unenlightened" belief systems, such as the one upon which the Chantry is based- I'd believe that their understanding is limited, especially since it is unlikely to be a mage compiling and testing this knowledge, given their fear.

If anything, the strength of the mages they do possess makes little sense. Theoretically, their mages should be far inferior to anything that the other nations of Thedas produce, and should certainly not have any knowledge of healing magics.

Perhaps Qunari mages really do, as a necessity, deal with demons to learn their arts. In which case- their strength makes more sense, but so does their imprisonment.

Really cool little story. The whole who does everyone not yell apostate when Merril, Anders and Mage Hawke run around with giant staffs always seemed a tad off to me too.

Wow... okay, first speaking to the menstruation thing: it probably doesn't matter much because medieval menstruation isn't particularly interesting to most fans- it's just handled offscreen, relatively simply. While it could conceivably power blood magic, I really don't think it does matter. Every female mage or templar with a shred of decency and intelligence, and hopefully some of the men, would instantly know what's going on when a female mage "suddenly" manifests exceptional talent, especially if it's monthly. Then promptly turn the maleficar in for well-deserved execution. Wynne would have this in DA:O, and I'm annoyed by the fact it was cut from the game, because interesting story consequences shouldn't be dumbed down so blatantly and lazily. As dumbing down describes all of DA2, however, I like the general thrust of this story exposing it.

What I don't like is some of the more questionable inferences. Qunari don't waste anyone, so I can't see them simply executing children for manifesting magic. Sewing their mouths shut, yes. Rendering them Tranquil, yes. Shoving them face-first into qamek, yes. They definitely could see the advantage of female mages, and I wouldn't be surprised to hear they treat them like breeding cattle to make saarebas who are powerful yet docile. But the Qunari do that to absolutely everyone, so I'm not surprised. They're far more benevolent than many other players in Thedas, but it comes at the cost of systematically eliminating free choice- similar to the Turians in many ways.

At any rate, their ban on female warriors shouldn't extend to assassins: they can fight, but it isn't their strong suit. Tallis is there to sneak in, investigate, then murder people: if she has to fight, something's gone wrong. Then again, the fact she's a super warrior does reflect poorly on qunari doctrine, and I chalk it up to lazy Mary-Sue writing (there it is again!) as well as pandering to the Felicia Day fans.

As for the Templars- of course they have trouble finding mages. Not only do they have to be exceptionally strong and mentally resistant, they have to be outstanding detectives too? Against enemies with mind control and magic powers? Even then Gregaoir, Ser Otto and Ser Emeric do a commendable job in trying to bring evil mages to justice, which is more than I can say for any other mage in the series except the PC mage, and maybe Wynne/ Irving. But then, I suppose the idea of having reasonable templars and mages rubs against the grain of DA2's heavy-handed morality play where all templar are evil jerk-faces whose religious fanaticism demand they treat mages and Tranquil like things, DOES THIS REMIND YOU OF ANYTHING. More laziness masquerading as maturity and one more reason I truly hated DA2, especially compared to the original game.

I think the writing here is wonderfully evocative of the negative emotions that Kirkwall, aka The Worst Place Ever, breeds in people. I think Varric is the only character in this story that I feel the slightest amount of sympathy or approval for, and I'm sorry about this Mage!Hawke- sorry only to the extent that Cullen, or even Meredith, didn't lop her head off about five seconds after she entered the Gallows. The story reeks of Hawke's whining- yes her life is hard, join the club, and she goes out of her way to assume that everyone else besides herself is a gigantic wanker who is out to make life miserable for poor pitiful her. That no one else is having a -difficult time- except the mages, who are so oppressed because no understands them. As opposed to having their reality-warping powers controlled. Empathy is completely beyond this Hawke, considering her friends and family can't resist the mammoth tyranny that Meredith has built, and I manage to dislike her even more completely than Anders or Act 1 Fenris. (But not more than Ser Alrik, cartoonishly evil Templar that wouldn't be possible without a STUPID retcon of the Tranquil-ization process.)

I admit that I dislike mage whining when I'm willing to cut Fenris, and even Carver, a great deal more slack. Maybe because they're incredibly powerful, and yet it's never enough for them, so they deal with demons for blood magic? Maybe because so many look to Tevinter as an example, when it's a nation of supremacist slavers who gladly enslave or murder anyone who isn't sufficiently evil enough for them? Of course this Hawke has gone to live as a Magister: it's the logical place where a certain type of mage will definitely be happy.

Regardless, the story makes the point of the reality of Kirkwall brilliantly. Your use of time-cuts and subtlety was about a hundred times better done than the actual game. If your point was to distill all that made Kirkwall a shithole in a short story- bravo.

Okay, I'm utterly convinced. You are, without a doubt, the greatest Dragon Age writer on this damn site. This was amazing!