This is delightfully ridiculous and absolutely hilarious.

Love the stereotypical detective parody.

Malfoy as a culprit, despite becoming a trope, stays brilliant as ever. Keep on writing, we can expect great things from you.

Malfoy did it! He used a fish perfume to disguise the smell of the eggs!

I know, I know!

Dumbledore was walking down the corridor, trying to find where all of his Lemon Drops had gone (Malfoy stole them) when he heard two people in a broom closet screaming. Thinking they were in trouble, he decided to bring a cannon and some chains.

When he tried to transfigure the golem into a cannon, it did not work, so he thought the chains would have to do. He sneaked into Filch's torture centre, where he found a Kwikspell Letter for Squibs. Since it was unwilling to become a cannon, he converted it into a cannon and exchanged it for a first year's candy.

But the candy was so good, he ate all of it and did not have any to offer the other people.

So he went back to find a Kwikspell letter, but he found none. So he opened all drawers (Filch was meanwhile disguised as a bear, seducing Snape in the rose bush) and happened upon some candy. Pleased, he took them back to his own office.

When Snape came in to complain about Potter he offered the Potions Master some, which were readily accepted. Snape left them in his room. Draco stole them, too, but wasn't hungry anymore, so he left them near the sheds.

The brave goat ate them, and turned into a stealthy goat. It pooped on the floor, since everyone knows that you can't find a stealthy goat pooping on the floor.

Hooch was suspicious of the smell, so she decided to find the cause.

Upon observing the brooms, she stole them and told the Elves to put them in the lake. One of the elves was Dobby, who was Malfoy's old slave!

Hence proved! Malfoy was behind everything!

World Wide Web?

Whoa! Harry sure is smart!

That IS Aberforth's goat, isn't it?

Abby is a Goat Smuggler, who trains the brave hircines to become watchmen, sneaky goats to turn into cat burglers, smart goats into escapologists and shags the rest!

Is that Aberforth?

Will Detective Harry ever find the Draconian Tea Party ? Or will the kingpin of english stereotypes escape again?

Pimpy Lucius and Tea Party Draco?

Kristofer Aström - Just a little insane ?

Presenting to you, the Hogwarts Detective Duo!

With the over-enthusiastic Lead Detective, Harry Potter, the reluctant tag-along, Hermione Granger, will they stop the sexually addled nymphomaniac, Snivellus, from shagging the unsuspecting Grizzly?

Read on to find out!

Found it today, and it is great!

Hilarious! Absolutely hilarious!

please, do not abandon this awesome story.

This is amazing, thank you so much for writing this!