Very good!

I very much enjoyed the way you show Caspian growing into understanding here. Excellent, especially considering the length! Thank you for sharing this, and I hope you keep writing.

Best,
Evia

You did a great job of showing the two options facing every person: you can use evil to lift yourself up, resulting in your humiliation, or you can submit to God and be exalted (Matt 23:12). The way you used the same phrase with different intent was well done, and I REALLY liked the words and phrases you used at end in regard to his response to Aslan: "irresistible call to His will" and "only one thing he could say". As a huge fan of the Reformers, I always smile when I read stuff like that. So, great story AND great theology. :)

Amazing. I'm at a loss for words.

I loved it. It reminds me so much of our relationship with God, and how Satan tries to deceive. I really enjoyed it. Sorry for taking so long to read and review. It is so simple, so true, and so real. Good work!

Am I getting any more helpful in my reviews?

God Bless,
Ashleigh

Wonderful! I have not seen this moment from Caspian's point of view. And his taking Jadis' words and saying them to Aslan, with a whole different meaning and understanding, was brilliant.

Job well done!

1. The king and the end should be capitalized, because then you'd be more consistent.
2. It's a good thing you capitalized the He referring to Aslan but if you read it aloud, it would be quite confusing and could be considered pronoun abuse.

3. That was awesome! Makes you think. Thinking is good.

Nice to see that caspian understood what he nearly did but how he was saved. he gave thanks for that.

Oooh, nice contrast. :D