I don’t like it that Draco only notices Hermione when she has makeover and become pretty ... otherwise do u think he will like her as she is ...?

I don’t like this type of fics ..

I skimmed bits and pieces due to other reviews.
I wish I hadn't.
It was ridiculously discombobulated.
The influx of original characters, the head-hopping, Hermione's lack of backbone. I swear ideas were just tossed together to create unnecessary drama and did nothing for the story.
Don't even get me started on the Americanisms.
Utterly. Ridiculous.

I really loved this story in the beginning, but now it's beginning to look like a whole other story. I loved that Hermione, in the beginning, was an independent young woman that didn't let anybody rule over her. But what the hell couldn't you have figured out another quote for her to live by than WTF? and in the beginning, it looked quite rushed and hurried. However, as the story progressed she began losing her own will, it was like she lost her own personality and everything from then on was about Draco. It shouldn't be like that. and if Draco liked Hermione he would never in his life accept the proposal to Flori and would have done more to stop it from ever happening at all.

So, I will stop reading this now.

I will just say your writing style gets better as the story goes on, so don't stop your writing because of the negative reviews you have gotten. After all, it is a good story but it's not my taste. ;)

I didn’t like Hermione didn’t have any self respect, I mean! The guy she was dating lied to her for MONTHS, and she was like totally ignoring the important stuff.

Ya you go Hermione! Show Ron what he missed out on!

Why should or would an intelligent and confident girl like Hermione wish to be someone else? WTF as a new motto, not sure how to say this, but it is not a frase intelligent people use, and whatever Hermione is, she sure is that.
I think, your story would do better in another fan-fic setting. Maybe something taking place in an american high school.
I know my words were not as kind, as they could be, however I think, it is brave of you to put your work out there for all of us to see. And remember practise make perfect!

I didn't read most of the chapter, but I feel the need to point out that FB was launched in 2004. The war in 1999. There's no way Hermione would be on it and it's not like there can be a magical version because wizards are notoriously bad with technology. If you're going to write more HP fic please take the time to at least type into Google "when was [insert thing] invented" as the entirety of the series takes place in the 90s. I might have given your fic more off a chance if you had put at least that much effort into it.

Oh ha hi... liked this chapter alot.

Could hardly finish the first chapter. Seems like it would be a good story, but the writing feels like I'm reading a 13 year old's diary.

You were in high school when this was completed, weren't you? It's not bad, bot great, about the same quality as I was writing. Some continuity problems, like the fact that, in 1999, facebook wasn't a real thing yet. You would have wanted to use MySpace, Kiwibox, Bolt, or iTurf. The jargon is all off, which is, again, another timing issue. You've got mid-00's American slang in a late-90's British fic. The characterization seems a bit of self-insertion where Hermione is involved, and the plot is wacky and awkward.
I would love to see an edit of this, however, and would definitely give it another chance. If you need this Britpicked, I'd hop on one of the fb groups or ask someone in the community here.

I think that the story started out great but i just can not get over the fact that draco does literaly nothing to stop the mariage or to be with it wasnt for flori they wouldnt be together in the end.I thought that draco didnt deserve the happy it was just so i really like your writing work just not what I'm okey for mentally

I want you to know that I have come back to read this story about 10 times over the years, I love your writing. Don't worry about the negative reviews

Too much of America mentioned, this is a British Fanfic soooo where is the Britishness. Also no contractions, it makes the story stiff and unrealistic.
It really irked me that all the witches and wizards had laptops in the actual books it was mentioned that since Hogwarts is so old the magic there is to strong and ancient for muggle technology.
Characters are EXTREMELY shallow, one-dimensional, and just irritating.
Hermione comes off as a WHORE. NOT A BADASS, A HOE.
The whole emotion laspect of this story is off. I understand maybe she didn't care for Ron as much as she thought but to not even be pissed that he cheated in the first place instead of breaking it off.
Too many simple sentences.

I decided to add another review because I felt my other one was way to harsh. Especially since I did enjoy one of your other stories.

Truthfully the reason I was so harsh is I am tired of garbage Fanfic with weak characterization, unrealistic or self insert OC's, and shorty writing.

And I really really REALLY wonder about what people are reading, what EDUCATION they are receiving, WHERE their heads are at when they encourage horrible, terrible, writing. And you are not even close to being the worse but I sew these reviews on these weak stories bit not on the genuinely good ones. And I am lost.

Also I dislike when Americanisms are inserted into the Wizarding World.

Actually let me clarify, I thoroughly dislike when Americanisms are added that take away, distract from the story so SPECTACULARLY in a blvery bad way because they make Americans seem egotistical and overly proud.

Dont get me wrong I AM PROUD TO BE AN AMERICAN...sometimes...but to through it in so half-hazardly it makes me cringe inside for the other people from different countries reading this and thinking badly about us for it or reinforcing bad stereotypes. Especially those from the UK because it's there shine or something like that youre stealing. Idk if that's what they all feel. But I know it's how I would feel and how I do feel when the same thing happens with the black characters in the actual books being replace with white character. Like Blade or Dean. It makes me feel like DAMN THERE IS ONLY LIKE 3 MENTIONED BLACK CHARACTERS IN THE FUCKING BOOKS, SERIOUSLY.

I just feel skimped out like Taco Bell with their cheese.

-Hermione is way the fuck off.

-Draco is way the fuck off.

-All the parents in general are way the fuck off.

-The setting is the way the fuck off.

-No contractions, way off.

-Self insert execution way the fuck off.

-OC's way the fuck off.

-Hermione is a hoe way the fuck off.

-Hermione personality in the beginning way the fuck off.

-Hermione is just a slutty submissive way the the fuck off.

-Americanisms just plain irritating as shit.

-Dialogue...just why...just wtf...idu

-Plot...No contraceptives...no common sense amongst any of the characters.

I DO STAND BY MY POINT OF FEELING LESS INTELLIGENT THAT WHEN I STARTED TUE STORY.

Literally SKIPPED 4 CHAPTERS, skimmed the rest until this point, and just wondering why I even bothered to do that.

This story is SOOOO POINTLESS, TRITE, STUPID, PATHETIC.

I feel as if while reading it I was loosing IQ points.
"Biotch"...:Veg out"..."dawg"...WTF.

A COMPLETE WASTE OF TIME.

DO NOT READ.

Don't let any bad reviews put you down, I just finished your story and it was so entertaining, so much fun, and I loved how Dramione was portrayed in it. Thank you for the great reading. Xx