So ducking good

So in Edward's place is Alice. Not very original. Still, I am curious to see if Bella has any common sense than what she had in the books.

This was actually good. I would say better than canon but that's not really saying much is it? So, i will just say it was good.

Well damn, James just got his ass handed to him by the little pixie. Ah man, its such a shame we cant see his face in that moment right before Alice ripped his head off. I imagine he would have had an amusing expression.

But what did he see?

uhm...i loved the story, but the ending wasnt as satisfyingly as i thought it was going to be. im kind of underwhelmed if im honest.

Parts of this story, I loved. Others were just confusing and dissapointing. for example, this story had no sense of time. The “New Moon” part where she was with Jake was very short despite the length of time it was meant to occur during. Additionally, saying that Leonid had a vision without explaining what it is, it’s lazy and inconsiderate for your reader. It’s like saying all of Walking Dead is a dream. Also, I understand that you want Rosalie and Bella to be friends and all. But using her constantly at the exclusion of other characters, it’s strange and not realistic? (Not that vampires are realistic). You have some incredible moments in your story, I just think you need to fix a few things for it to be more enjoyable to someone like me. Please don’t take this the wrong way.

Well, that was awesome! :D
I liked the fact, that in the beginning the story was very close to the original twilight. I loved the small details which you changed that the story fits to Alice/Bella, like the girl in Port Angeles which was (sadly) a victim of the men that originally assaulted Bella and some things like that. But I also liked the fact, that during the course you changed the story and let it goes their own way! :) I looooovved the Rosalie Bella bonding-time! 3 Actually I have to say, that in the original story I don't like Rosalie very much, I understand why she is how she is, but I could never connect my feelings with her... If you write about her... I understand her and can empathize with her much better!
Although the story has a nice ending, there are so many questions open, like 'what was the vision leonid has had', 'whats with jacob and the other wolfes' something like that... perhaps one day you will have the feeling, write a few more Chapters and continue the line :-*
Furthermore I have to say, that I read a few storys of twilight now and you are by far one of the best authores! The description ob the emotions are wonderfully written! Please continue writing! *Q* Not only this story awesome, every one of your storys is as well! *_* I can laugh, cry, get angry and everything else while reading them *_*

I loved this so much! Thank you for writing and sharing!

That feeling when a twit posts a prentious comment on a 12 year old story I wrote when I was sixteen having only read two chapters, then denies private messaging to bask in the glory of their egoism. Like...ok lmao

"Bella meets Alice first. Think you've read them all? This one may pleasantly surprise you."

You realize though that all you have done though is switch Edward's place in the story with Alice and made it to where she had a class with one of the Cullens before lunch.

The only right part about your summary is "Bella meets Alice first," if you can even call that a meeting. Sorry for being a critic but the truth hurts... and should help with your writing.

Amazing story! Please pretty please continue!

man alice needs to chill the fuck out bella's coming out was hilarious. also this story reads like a parody at times it's great

This story is amazing and makes me happy. Your other stories, especially Sisters and Past is Past make me so sad, but this one made me happy! It was so awesome! I can't praise this story enough, really! This is awesome.

PS. I'd totally read a sequel to Sisters where Alice confesses her feelings and they get together. Just saying ;)

At the start, I really absolutely loved this story. Bella seemed so apathetic and actually mature. Then you killed it by introducing her introvertedness and having Alice make her all teenage angst.

But that was fine. That seems to be how Bella is in most other Twilight stories I've read. The worst part is the middle of the story. Bella's friends just disappear from your story. Jacob becomes a huge ass and also disappears. Oh. And there also seemed to be large time lapses. It just felt like a very forced transition to get to the Russian Volturi. And that's what they are to me. You can call them what you want but the only difference between the two groups is really the location and the members. I think this part was okay, as in average, since I didn't understand the point of changing the Volturi.

As mentioned, the beginning was the best. And I despised the middle portions.