Great story

i loved it

I think that in the last few chapters Amy and Ian were a bit OOC. I mean, how often does Amy smirk and scream?

And Ian seemed open and a lot less calmish?

My opinion, of course.

It's a good story though. A good entry for the contest.

Hope to see another of your stories,

~Klbooks~

Nice! But u didn't explain the finger prints on allistair yet! Cuz if one was Bae who was the other? U could make a sequel! Lol! UPDATE SOON PLEAZ!

Oooooh! Cliff-hanger! I love and hate those things... It's a good story, and I like it.

Good chap! YAY! U used my idea! I'm in a shout out! Anywayz love it!

OMG! I CANT WAIT 4 THE NEXT CHAPTER! XD

omg it is great please finish it soon

Hilarious!

Very witty, too.

You're really smart.

I love this story.

Good job! I really don't imagine Natalie as a killer, but it's your story. I like how yours is really funny and has a lot of smarts stuff that you have to figure out, even though I haven't solved even one. You have good vocabulary and grammar, and I think the characters are pretty IC.

Update!

~KLBooks~

* computer is messed up so won't let me log in*

I think u should have the letter be someone trying to frame Isbel and Natalie! Cuz Ean just happen to find Natalies diary page which it just happened to say she and isbel murderered Allistair is WAY too obvious! And If u do do my idea it would make a GREAT twist! Anyways UPDATE SOON!

'"Whbtdmbithas," Madison, very confused, read.

"I think it's the real message this time, dear," Mary-Todd said to Madison.'

I love it. Can't wait for more!

Good story... Amy and Dan were IC... This chapter was kind of confusing though... Everything from "It was 7:43 AM. Normally, Dan Cahill would never..." to "'Whbtdmbithas,' Madison, very confused, read. 'I think it's the real message this time, dear,' Mary-Todd said to Madison." After that I sort of lost you. Good work. Keep on writing, and you'll get better.

This really was very good. You had great grammar, spelling, flow, and ICness. There were a few mistakes, however. :) But you should still be proud, because this is a good story so far.

CC:

- I think that it is "choked" instead of "chocked." I forget where you wrote that, so I can't put it in context, but it was there.

- When Ian says something like, "Like the Americans say, whatever." You should italicize "whatever" or put it in separate quotation marks. It just reads better. "Like the Americans say, 'whatever.'"

There were also a few that I can't remember...

All in all, this was really good! Congrats!

&PBG&

Sounds quite good really, keep going

NOOO! allistiar died! ;-(