Alright badass Bella

The explanation Sam gave Bella was actually pretty awful. The comment about her probably not becoming emotionally stable enough to stop phasing. The emphasis on immortality. Sam's random assignment of Bella's place in the pack as third, and one day second to Jacob made no sense considering he only took her bloodline into account and not her personality. Some people have alpha personalities, some beta, some omega. It's not an assignment, it's an inherent trait. Otherwise, Sam would have lost alpha status to Jacob from the start.

Bella's sudden drastic change in personality as a result of the transformation is extremely weak and psychologically unrealistic. Deciding to go from shy Bella to sexy Bella simply because she could turn into a wolf makes no sense, as who she truly is hasn't been altered. I also am very skeptical on how well she's handling being a shape-shifter. Jacob fought it so hard in the books. Bella just rolls over and accepts it, like it doesn't add to the emotional rollercoaster she's already on. Her entire future is in the balance, she's an emotional wreck, her life is turned upside AGAIN, and all of a sudden her concern is to be sexy? It comes across as you just wanting to throw the old weak Bella out without putting in the work to see her go through all the necessary steps to get there. You wanted to get to the good parts, so you fast-tracked it, but instead of looking good it only severely weakens your story.

I also think the suggestion for Bella to change schools is ridiculous since it's her last few months of her senior year. Risk of phasing or not, the last thing she needs is more change and instability at that moment. Everyone is telling her how things are going to be and what she's going to do. Having Bella starting to tear apart at the seams, only to find solace and healing with Paul would be so much better than the direction you've taken where Bella is suddenly going to have a sexy and outgoing personality with a new and positive outlook on life. You're missing way too many elements, and it's just not fun to read a story where major plot holes are abundant.

I hope my feedback helps. Good luck.

I really like your story content, but your poor formatting makes it hard to read. Giant paragraphs that really should be cut up, and all your dialogue shoved into one paragraph instead of separated by each line. I recommend editing that for easier reading and to keep the attention of pickier readers who might consider this too amateur.

i like the moon before i hated the moon now i like it
so give me a question now what about you friends

bye

I really love this story but I think that if you make more pharagrafs it would be easier to read

I love your story! You are a gifted storyteller! I couldn't stop reading your story. I hope that even though twilight has been over for many years that you might consider writing more of this story? Would love to hear from you anytime. I'm always on reading different stories and online most times. Hope you like my review!

Could use a beta to help with spelling .

It's off not of.

Oh my goodness gracious! I fell in love with this story I think within the first 2 or 3 chapters! And it has just blossomed from there. This story was so intense and suspenseful and truly kept me on the edge of my seat. I could not for the life of me accurately predict what was to come. This story was written so incredibly!

To be honest, it is such a shock to think about the beginning of the story and what is happening there with Bella just being upset about feeling heartbroken and abandoned again by Jake, phasing, the imprint with Paul, things that were kinda 'basic' and even 'normal' with fanfics that have been written and then to come to the end of the story where that has all been blown so out of proportion. It's amazing that it is the same story!

There has been so much that I have just absolutely loved about this story. I loved the mother hen that Bella was to all. I loved that you followed some of the story line of the book as far Victoria, the newborn army, the Voluri, etc but each of those situations in this story were so different and unpredictable that it made it so interesting and thoroughly kept my attention! I loved the sacrifices that were made by Leah and Edward, and how amazingly you brought that whole situation together full circle. I loved that you used several different POVs throughout the story so readers could understand what was happening from various angles.

This type of story that you have created is so rare to come by. This has truly been one of my favorite stories to read and I am sure that I will come back to this and read it again. Thank you so, so much for this incredible read!

love it take all the time u need

king of the underworld - old hubby - my guess

u said u were just taking a break,but seven plus years is a very long break.i hopein the near fontinue with part u will c

thank you for wriiting such a great story. imglad to see the pack all getting that jake has his own imprint is one of those feel good stories to read.i hope to read more of your stories in times to come

I knew it! Then again it was a bit obvious on who Edwards mate was...well to me lol. But happy about the ending...i dislike how it happened but I'm still happy cause their happy

I knew Leah would be the sacrifice to the prophecy! When Bella and Billy was discussing the prophecy and and the reason why Leah also phased...i just thought she must be connected to the sacrifice part of the prophecy...i hate when I'm right sometimes *sigh*.