oh. im quite dissapointed really. i thought that love might still blossom between them, even he could hear her thoughts. its quite sad that bella's insecurities were right. that if edward could hear her thoughts he would'nt like her. but what im sad about most of all is that now edward will have to live without his soulmate and child. its really depressing. but i liked the story anyway. im now just in a depressing mood though. :( hey, maybe cookies would help? yeah, chocolate chip. . .
-abby

Wow. WOW

I can see why a lot of people think this is a good story (and it is) but i don't like it. I agree that Bella has a selfish side and that all her choices have a selfish part to it, but everyone's does. She moved to Forks for her mother because it made her mother unhappy to stay with her, she kept silent about her hatred for Forks because she didn't want to make anyone else unhappy, etc. I think you did a good job with the punctuation and grammar, but it also was a total change from Bella's thoughts and i doubt Edward would be that heartless.

It's nice to see Edward's view on Bella's thoughts. Now that I look back Bella really was shallow when she first encountered Edward.

Kind of weird having Edward think that he's lucky that Bella died in that way.

Anyway, nice job and I hope you write more Anti-Twilight fics (These stories aren't really bashing Twilight just for the sake of it but giving realistic views on the books and characters.)

Hmm. So that's why it ends here. Bella died in the first book. Wow, really short, but good one though!

Wow this is so funny! Thank you! I have always thought that Bella's thoughts were actually really petty and shallow. She is nothing like what Edward says she is!

Bella is so irritating, I'm glad she got squashed by the van :P Nice turnaround!

ARE YOU SERIOUS? I HATE IT YOU CAN SAY WhATEVER ABOUT MY STORY BECAUSE ME ATLEAST I DON"T SPEAK ENGLISH CRAPPY STORY

Wow, you made Edward likeable... that's skill, that is.

wait...are you changing bella's thoughts on purpose?

...

Chagrin.

I was directed here from TwilightSucks, I love how it's not an outright Twilight bashing but a well thought-out story. I started (but probably won't finish) a rewrite of Twilight a while ago, and I remember while reading through the book to find things to salvage seeing how disgustingly shallow most of Bella's thoughts and perspective on things are. You took that and used it well. Good job!

I loved this! If Edward could read Bella's mind, I doubt twilight would be any different from this story. Amazing!

Whoo hoo! Go Tyler's van! If only he knew the service he had done!

Ha! That was brilliant! I was directed here from TwilightSucks, and I really enjoyed this. Bella, contrary to popular belief, WAS very shallow and the only evidence I ever saw of her supposed self-sacrifing nature was...actually, I can't really pinpoint a moment. I guess that has to mean something!

Thanks for writing this - it was very good, and I definitely could see it happening. Bella's thoughts were all very shallow and selfish - "I hate Forks and the rain and I hate people and omigodprettypeople". You did well with this. _~

Cheers,

~ Estora ~