i love it! especially how they're both jeolous but don't that the other is too...

oh, wow! such a beautiful ending! lyra turning into dust, aww! in a way, everything got what they wanted. it was a sad story but you wrote it very well. :)

and no problem, of course i'll review! :D

i hope you can start writing more fanfics now. :)

bonboni

~X~

i like the character's name and the story, which is totally inspiring me to write a HDM fic

nice start!

OMG This story cannot stop amazing me! I wonder what is with Jonathon...? Continue soon!

it's great to read about lyra again in this fanfiction, especially now that she's died. (so difficult to say out loud, i'd never thought i'd say this)

poor ericka, she doesn't seem too well. i think that she just misses lyra. but then again, who wouldn't?

update soon please! :D

bonboni

~X~

Ok...I had to admit that this was a shock! I can't believe Will...but I still thinkt hat he loves Lyra and tries to convince himself otherwise. Mabe Ercka will make him see the truth. As for Lyra's death...I think that it would be good if she was revived...it is really soon for something like this to happen. Presonally I would like it if noone died...Anyway, I can't wait to see what happens next.

I liked the fact that Ericka and Lyra became friends again! This chapter touched me more than the others. I think you made it obvious that Lya and Ericka are (probably) true friends and will face anything together. Nice!

...This is sad...Personally, I don't think that Will really stopped thinking about Lyra. He was seeing her in Katia's face and probably wanted to think that he stopped thinking about her...I feel very sad for Lyra. Nice chapter though!

Nice chapter. I like Lyra's undying love for Will. It's sad that she had a fight with Ericka though...anyway good work!

I love your story! Please update soon

love the story. but why would lyra want will to be happy after what he said to her? and who in the name of everything pleasent and happy and messed up is Jonathan? i am like...nm. love ur story please update soon!

hey! just like to say, i really enjoyed reading that! wow... thats so suspenseful i can't wait to read more! update soon i am waiting... lol.

the adivce that jonathan gave will was very true! i liked that part. and now we see that katia's very confused and doesn't know what to do... anyway, i really enjoyed that chapter. please make sure you update soon!

bonboni

~X~

It's a little soapy...change some aspects, like put some adventure, some danger into it to prevent it from being a soap opera. And soap operas are cheesy and cliched.