Wow, I liked it! :) It was a really good poem - poetic (lol) and of course, (which some poems are too abstract to understand) I understood every sentence of yours :) which is good :P.

It was also cute :)

Not bad...although I'm not a huge fan of the AB AB writing style, it was a good poem. Good job.

roseeyes out!

That's so beautiful.

nice job, i liked it very much :)

wow tht was amazingly good im adding it to my favorites u have a way with words

oh I love this! it's so bitter sweet. I really like the way you arange your rhymes and especially how you repeat the trees/breeze face/space rhymes.

If you don't mind come cc: the line 'from the day I was born I was cursed with theis fate' is a bit off in length, it might sound better if you just cut the secong 'I was' (from the day I was born, cursed with this fate)

the last two lines seem off as well, I think it's because you don't have any other rhymes that close together. However I have no idea what you could to fix it.

Anyways it's really well written and I can't wait to read more of your poems and stories!

bai bai

I like it. It flows nicely.

Wow, this was really good. I can't do poetry at all. T.T Most of the stuff people write about Hiei and Yukina isen't so good but yours was awesome. I'm now adding ti to my favs! _ Thanks for writing such a buetiful piece of poetry.

You had me going till that last line...

It's good, but I think doth was a poor word choice...maybe rephrase your last line so it better fits into the rest of the poem?

Otherwise, it was really good and the rhymes didn't seem too forced.

-Hiei's Phoenix Girl

P.S.- You should try a non-rhyming poem...

why cant i be that gifted? *is jealous*

*sniff* so beautiful

Ah! I love it! Very nice!

Your poem rocks so hard!

I love it!

No, really. I can't rhyme if my live depended on it, much less even make a poem.

XOXO, Naito

PS: HB FOREVER!