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Poor Illena

You have a great idea for a story. However, the ending is abrupt, difficult to follow, and seems very rushed.

:D you could have done loads with tht story but i still think it was good like tht :D well done and keep up the good work !

Chow !

well, rather silly story. I wonder if you intended for silliness.

Highlights - lovely gay couple, Sir Didymus and the Price of the Bog :D

wow. that was so good...right up till the ending. come on now. that can't possibly be how you see their FIRST MEETING. maybe like a little more depth. you're obviously a good writer, but it seems like you didnt spend much time on this. There's really good stuff here, you just need to go a bit deeper.

Loved the 'changing into what's in your heart' idea. Ending was a bit abrupt. Wish she would have kicked him, but that's me. Thanks for the story.

Um, wow- But Didymus and Hoggle together? I can't see that. I really like the idea of the Labyrinth changing the humans, not Jareth. It's a really good story so far, I have to read more. Your grammer, punctuation, and spelling is great too.

W.A.H.

JC

That was awesome. I really enjoyed it. It made me laugh.

I love the end! hehehe!

Nice story, with a nice twisting plots.

Hey there! This story was quite intriguing! I could'nt stop reading! There were a few fuzzy spots, but I got the jist of it! Bravo Jess! I like it!

I really liked this. It was really cute.

Cute end to an innovative concept. :)

Cute story, but kind of an abrupt ending. Wanted to see a lot more of their interaction.

Loved what you did with Illena, though!

hehe - nice! Im grinning from ear to ear :D