["Commander Mars, what is that?" Cyrus asked. Mars was sitting on the settee, holding a small white packet. "Is it a state of the art memory key that can hold a TB of RAM?"

Mars giggled. "No, sorry Boss. It's a new lip gloss that I bought".]

Those two things look nothing alike. I don’t see how anyone could confuse them.

Punctuation goes inside dialogue quotes.

It seems you intended this to be amusing, but I just find it incredibly depressing. The way you’ve portrayed Cyrus makes him seem like a fundamentally broken human being who does not understand human interaction in the slightest, making this relationship doomed to failure.

Ahh! I love it!

Heh, this was pretty funny. Dry humor and such. I think my favorite sentence would be Cyrus wishing that the gloss had been a state of the art memory key that could hold a TB of RAM. Or maybe the sentence 'Mars made an explosive noise.' XD Nicely done!
Thank you for writing, I liked it, and keep writing! !

awesome read! also, welcome back!

PERFECTION, MATE XD XD XD This is so Cyrus-y lmao it's perfect XD