Awesome story! Dark but interesting, and it was so well written!

Oh WOW.

Really well done. I love the idea, the general level of creepiness, and your overall writing style. My only criticism would be the ghost's "dialogue." Some of it came across as manic and added to the story's sense of foreboding, but I think other parts seemed trite and kind of overused. I think I would have used this more sparingly. But, that's just my humble opinion, and I am now off to read your other TMNT stories, if you have any.

P.S. My favorite line: the part about Mikey learning to spit/whistle. It was an unexpected nugget of hilarity.

Ugh I don't get it! And I'm not sure if it's supposed to be... gotten? Anyway, I just don't get it. So the shadowy thingy certainly was some form of Donatello I guess, but why does he want SAINW to happen? If he's the Don from the SAINW verse, does that mean Don is evil? And if he isn't, then why? The Donnie in your story obviously cares a lot about his brothers, just can't see him as someone who would hurt them, or want them hurt. Think I said this before, but I really don't get it, other than maybe the universe wants it this way or something. Stupid universe.

Anyway sorry for that rant lets get to your story shall we? I totally loved it. Seriously, wouldn't write you this review if I didn't. I really liked your build up, it's evenly paced and the suspense isn't just thrown in your face. It sits their quietly in the form of the Don-shadowy-thing until BOOM climax of the story. Loved that! I had to read this story into two parts because of work and couldn't focus on anything but finishing it when I got back home.

The characters are well written and you keep them very much into character. Too bad we don't get that much of Leo and Splinter though, I felt like they were pushed back to the background sometimes. Loved the banter and the playfullness between everyone in between the more angsty scenes.

Your writing is spot on, and very easy and comfortable to read. Just try to reread your story to fish out the tiny mistakes. There weren't many, but some sentences for example missed a word. Maybe if you'd read the story out loud for yourself, or if you find yourself a beta-reader, you can find those easier (not claiming that my stories are perfect or anything, just a tip).

With that being said, please take all of what I've said as either praise or constructive criticism. I'm not a proffesional writer either, so if you don't want to use my advise or think it's stupid, feel free to do so. I'm just writing all this because I love your story and want to speak my mind over it. Nothing more nothing less.

Keep writing!

See ya!

I think... this may be the best TMNT story I've ever read! The way the scenes are organized, the descriptions you used, the characters and how you portrayed them- they're all just so brilliant I can't even!

I think I have re-read it about 10 times over by now if not more! This amazing piece of work needs more love and more reviews, like pronto!

Seriously, I don't know where to start to explain why this story is so freaking brilliant! I think your wordings are what is gonna keep bringing me back to re-read this over and over again! 'His laugh, like everything else about him, is short and to the point.' 'The slow crocodile corner of his brain that lies in the water, observing, thinking, whispering-' 'Nothing shifts itself into the vaguest of something.' I'd put in waaaaay more examples, but man, how good these are, I am in awe! Great work!

Gosh that was good. Spooky at times, too. I really liked the metaphor of Don being the sun aka center of their world when raph grabbed his hot skin, that really spoke of how important don is to them. So was this SAINW based? Inspired? Totally unrelated? Why did the shadow take don's form and not, say, leo or mikey's? Was it because if Raph didn't lose his eye the universe would cause Don to died as the alternative? Very intriguing read.

Oh gosh, I was so scared this whole time. Stupid Universe! This was so intense, and just too perfect, I loved it!

Very curious read, and that's not meant in a bad way.