Hey, ya’ll! What’s up? What’s going on? I’m stuck at a meeting, surfin’ the net… and I found… this website!! Obviously.

So, I decided- like the awesome person I am- to make an account.

ALFRED F*ING JONES AT YOUR SERVICE!!!!!! Well, my middle name is actually Freedom, but I like F*ing better.

I am 19 yrs old. Which rocks and sucks at the same time. It sucks because I can’t drink in MY OWN COUNTRY!!!!! Seriously, how wrong is that? It rocks because HELLO? I’m NINETEEN!!! I have the world in the palm of my hand!!!

Figuratively. That’s figurative. Maybe.

I have two siblings- Mattie (Canada) and Nivi (Greenland). THEY ARE AWESOME!!! Dude, everyone thinks Mattie’s so quiet and innocent compared to me, but honestly…? He’s quiet the player. Loud, too. I remember this one time… hell, I’ll tell you about that in some of my rants.

Nivi (or as I call her, Greenie) doesn’t live with us- she wasn’t even raised by France and Iggy. Her ‘parents’ are Denmark and Norway. She lives with Denmark. She’s cool, though.

My favorite couples from Hetalia? I live Hetalia, bros.

Let me make a list.

1. UkUs: Why? Iggy’s sexy. He’s sweet, funny, and HE GIVES ME ICE CREAM!!!! I wouldn’t mind being taken by him. He’d be an epic boyfriend.
2. Franada: My bro’s been in love with France since we were kids. Don’t tell him I said that, though.
3. Giripan: Although Kiku won’t admit it, he adores Greece. They both have an awkward obsession with cats. And sex. But, hey, what can ya do, right?
4. Rochu: DO NOT PAIR ME WITH EITHER OF THEM. Ivan’s a friend of mine, a really good friend. Sure, we’ve fucked a few times, but he’s always liked China, in a weird, Russian way. NO OFFENSE!! And I just don’t like China… always trying to get me to pay my freaking debt…
5. AusPrus: Strange, huh? I know Prussia (he brings me beer) kinda well. His three favorite topics are himself, his dick, and Austria.

Well, there they are! My five favorite couples.

I do have a crush on Iggy (England, UK, Arthur). Just as long as Mattie has liked Francis, I think.

So, read? I’m basically doing this for fun.

Gotta go! Iggy's glaring at me!

(Don't own Hetalia!)

Dude!!! I've just realized what this site was! Fanfiction!

Well then, I'd better bore you with my top couples, huh?

1. Thorki from the Avengers. Because I can.
2. Johnlock from Sherlock on BBC.
3. Drarry from Harry Potter.

There they are! Thought I should tell ya'll, since you've been awesomely epic.