scottishdraka Poll: Sup people? So, here's the deal, I'm working on a reader insert (again) and like always I need your help! Reader-chan is going to be forced into a political union (sort of like an arranged marriage but for countries). Who should her husband be? More choices may be added as I think of them. Vote Now! |
 Author has written 20 stories for Naruto, Hetalia - Axis Powers, Avengers, and Thor. Hey guys, I've pretty much stopped using this account. I found out that the fan fiction I specalize in, reader inserts, are not allowed on this site. That came as a major surprise to me considering how many of them there are on here but whatever. I'm on Deviant Art and Wattpad now so you can always find me there. My DA: scottishdraka on deviantART My Wattpad: Kyla (scottishdraka) Free Stories You'll Love - Wattpad I'm hopeofabrightfuture on Polyvore and Tumblr. Code name: scottishdraka Real name: Kyla (in English it's pronounced Ky-la like a music note but in almost every other language they say it Key-la, don't ask me why) Age: 18 Gender: Female I have a lot of favorite things... Favorite books: Eye Like Stars, Looking Glass Wars, The Gathering Storm, The Book Theif Favorite movies: Braveheart, X-men, How to Train Your Dragon, Letters to Juliet, The Hobbit, Footloose Favorite game: HetaOni, Spore, Random Word Game, Devil May Cry (I've never played it but it looks awesome!), Risk Favorite mangas: Naruto, Kitchen Princess, I Hate You More Than Anyone, Library Wars, Sprial, Hetalia Favorite animes: Hetalia, Devil May Cry, Naruto, Full Metal Panic, Tsubasa: Reservoir Chronicles Favorite TV shows: Bones, Doctor Who, X-files, NCIS, NCIS: LA, Criminal Minds, Supernatural Favorite songs: Tonight Tonight, Place In The Choir, Look At Me, Hail The Hero, High School Never Ends, Monster, Hero, You're Gonna Go Far Kid (clean version), Moves Like Jagger (clean version), Fairytale Favorite singers: Celtic Thunder, tobyMac, Newsboys, Bowling for Soup, Skillet, Carrie Underwood, Voltaire, Benny Goodman Favorite colors: Blue, green, silver Favorite creature that may or may not exist (depends on who you talk to): Dragon Favorite animal: Tiger Favorite word(s): Pasta, Interesting (multipurpose word!), Eos, Vital Regions (again, multipurpose), International Affairs Family: Mom, Dad, oldest brother Travis, best friend Caylie (aka Brighterthanlight and she might as well be a sister) Things never done: Never gone on a date, kissed a boy, worn a kilt, hit someone with the intention of causing harm, or been made fun of Want to do: Fly, adopt a child, see the world, visit old family home in Scotland, go to an anime convention Obsession(s): Hetalia, anything Hetalia related (Hetaoni, fanfictions, youtube videos), Bones, Criminal Minds, psychocology, Doctor Who, Italy, Scotland, anime in general, music Favorite Hetalia characters (in no particular order): Italy (duh), Romano, Romania, Denmark, Norway, Germania, Germany, Scotland (even though he never appears in the series gotta stick with my homeland, sorry America), Prussia, Spain (sometimes), and France (when he's not being a total pervert, I know it's rare, a girl can hope right? Also I made my best friend take a personality test and it said she was like 100% France. Is that scary or what? ...Come to think of it I scored as Italy...) Okay now for some talk. About me... hmm. Well, my personality changes depending on the people I'm around. When I'm around adults I'm the voice of reason and I tend to play devil's advocate a lot but when I'm around people my own age... I'm crazy to put it mildly. I'm your average teenage tomboy mutt. I can claim ancestry from almost every place on earth except Canada (to be Canadian you have to be born there, my great grandmother was Canadian though), Africa, Mexico, pretty much anyplace that is known for having dark skin, Sweden, Asia, Russia, and Italy:( not fair, not fair. I am however German, Scottish (actually I probably should just say Celtic and make my list shorter), Portuguese, English, Dutch, Danish, Norwegian, basically any group that has really pale skin. Actually how about I just say European or Hetalian, that sums it up pretty well. I love sweet things! I have the biggest sweet tooth of my family strike that, of America (I know, impossible right?). I hate dresses and could live my life very happily in jeans and a t-shirt. My hair doesn't know if it's brown or red (ginger) and I freak out whenever I find platinum blonde strands because they look white. I have this odd habit of singing out Disney songs and songs from other countries at random moments. And sometimes I mix them together so I'll be singing I'll Make a Man Out of You in German while I'm shopping for my sugar fix or singing a Hetalia theme song and getting Asian people to look at me funny. I'm homeschooled and I'm a freshman in high school this year but I don't feel like it! Mt. Rainier is my guardian while I sleep and it really does rain a lot in Washington, though not nearly as much as we say it does. ;) I'm a Christian and I have never once shoved my beliefs down someone else's throat. That is a common old wives' tale like homeschoolers being shy, I have never met a shy homeschooler. Most of us are actually quite nice and very peaceful unless you bring up taking the Ten Commandments off the buildings in DC, taking 'In God We Trust' off our money, or trying to take away any of our Amendment rights (particularly the first and second). Then all hell breaks loose pardon my French and the bad pun. Ooh, test thingy! 1. FIRST NAME:I'm Kyla and you are? I Am Not That Girl: I am not that girl, BUT I am that girl, Re-post this if you are original and unique, and want to announce it to the world! Okay, now for my OCs. Since there's so much random crap on my profile I'm putting it here so people can find it. Name: Atlantis Human Name: Tristany Sinclair Gender: Female Age: 15 Personality: Generally energetic and not afraid to say what's on her mind. She usually can be found with her nose in a book or with her ear buds in listening to music (something she tends to do a lot at world meetings.) She has good relations with most of the countries but if they want a fight she gives them one. She loves alcohol and in her country there are no drinking laws. Her history was rather peaceful except when she had to fight with Greece for several thousand years and she only knows how to use swords. Anything that can be considered a modern weapon is completely foreign to her. She's a happy go lucky nation most of the time. During war time, she becomes more solemn. War is not funny to her. Appearance: She has blonde hair that has a green streak (Atlantis claims it's caused by saltwater when she goes swimming, only Italy believes her) and is about 5'7ish. She has ocean blue eyes and a slight tan. She prefers to wear jeans, t-shirts with pictures or fun sayings like 'I'm not retreating, I'm advancing in a different direction!', hoodies, and, of course, combat boots. She also wears a star shaped necklace that has been known to glow occasionally. History: When Atlantis was very young, her parents died so her boss was left to raise her. Because she was raised by a paranoid king and not by nations, Atlantis was left with very little knowledge about the outside world. But because of the lack of outside involvement Atlantis was able to build a small utopia. The afore mentioned paranoid king, in an attempt to save his kingdom from being taken over, ordered Atlantis to fight Greece. Ironically, Atlantis's war with Greece ended up being the death of her. (Details can be found in Twice and Nevermore) When Atlantis died, she left her two daughters, Atis and Lant (midnightstella's OCs), in the care of Iberia who in turn handed them over to Mexico. Though she was rediscovered by the nations again, the kingdom of Atlantis has no memories of her daughters. International relations: Scotland: Surprisingly they have a great relationship. Unlike most countries, Atlantis is not picky about her food so she will generally eat anything (luckily for her Scotland's cooking is way better than England's.) The two also share similar interests in music and after world meeting they have been found making music together Scotland on the bagpipes or drums and Atlantis on the harp, flute, or violin. France: Like most countries he flirts with her but their relationship is pure and they think of each other as friends or siblings. France, like so many other nations when Atlantis resurfaced, would go to war to protect her. S. Italy: Atlantis possess some sort of charm that not even the grouchiest nation can resist. Even though Romano dislikes Atlantis for spending so much time with his little brother he doesn't dislike Atlantis herself hard as he might try. However he does call her Fish Demon. N. Italy: He adores Atlantis enough said. Germany: Germany is considered to be one of Atlantis three guardians (the other three are Italy and Hungary.) He cares about the young nation in his care and is somewhere between a big brother and a father figure. Name: Yggdrasil Human Name: Nikki Sinclair Gender: Female Age: 14 Personality: Quiet. Usually allows her older "sister" Atlantis to speak for her. Follows the rules, listens to people in command. When pushed to the edge she will stand up for herself and others. Likes to do things without a whole lot of people watching her. Appearance: Dark hair, somewhere between chocolate brown and black, light silver eyes, white skin. About 5'6 in height. Wears relaxed greens and blues, jeans, and sneakers. History: Yggdrasil was raised by the three Norns (the Nordic equivalent of the three Fates) and spent most of her life at the foot of the great tree whose name she shared and was connected to. Legend has it, that when Yggdrasil appears, Ragnarok, the fall of the Gods, is nigh. Because of this, when Yggdrasil appeared to the world, the Nordics refused to care for her. Yggdrasil is less of a nation and more of a connector. She connects the world of man to the underworld and the land of the gods. First and foremost, however, she represents the kingdom of Asgard. International Relations: Atlantis: They're not technically related. Their sibling bond springs from the fact that neither of them should exist. Germany: He loves Yggdrasil like a daughter even going so far as to formally adopt her and Atlantis. Italy: He adores both Yggdrasil and Atlantis. Nordics: They don't mind being around Yggdrasil but she holds a bit of a grudge against them because when she first reappeared, they refused to take her in. Name: ? Called "Shadow" Country: ? Unknown if she is a country or a human Age: Teenage somewhere between 14 and 16 Personality: Very quiet, she has never spoken a word in fact to any of the other countries. Her likes and dislikes are unknown as she never really makes them clear. She may like alcohol as she has been seen drinking it whenever someone gives it to her and she is never drunk. She is adept at using any type of weapon. Due to her mute nature the majority of the countries cannot form an opinion of her. Appearance: Really long "darker than black hair," eyes that have the hue of melted gold, about 5'9 more or less, her skin is so white it boarders on unhealthy. Shadow also as scars covering almost every patch of skin she has, they are from unknown sources but suggest she had a painful past. She doesn't care what she wears but Italy usually makes sure she is decent in a "military" outfit. She is usually seen wearing a dark military outfit with knee high boots that appear to be slightly too large and a metal necklace that she never lets anyone touch. Her hair is usually braided or pulled into a pony tail. History: ? Still working on that but if you knew too much that would kind of ruin the story... Rules for Dating Our Daughter Note: This isn't mine, I just agree with it completely. I found this on Tumblr all rights belong to Supernatural 1. If you pull into my driveway and honk you’d better be delivering a package, because you’re sure not picking anything up. 2. You do not touch my daughter in front of me. You may glance at her, so long as you do not peer at anything below her neck. If you cannot keep your eyes or hands off of my daughter’s body, I will remove them. 3. I am aware that it is considered fashionable for boys of your age to wear their trousers so loosely that they appear to be falling off their hips. Please don’t take this as an insult, but you and all of your friends are complete idiots. Still, I want to be fair and open minded about this issue, so I propose this compromise: You may come to the door with your underwear showing and your pants ten sizes too big, and I will not object. However, in order to ensure that your clothes do not, in fact, come off during the course of your date with my daughter, I will take my electric nail gun and fasten your trousers securely in place to your waist. 4. I’m sure you’ve been told that in today’s world, sex without utilizing a “barrier method” of some kind can kill you. Let me elaborate, when it comes to sex, I am the barrier, and I will kill you. 5. It is usually understood that in order for us to get to know each other, we should talk about sports, politics, and other issues of the day. Please do not do this. The only information I require from you is an indication of when you expect to have my daughter safely back at my house, and the only word I need from you on this subject is “early.” 6. I have no doubt you are a popular fellow, with many opportunities to date other girls. This is fine with me as long as it is okay with my daughter. Otherwise, once you have gone out with my little girl, you will continue to date no one but her until she is finished with you. If you make her cry, I will make you cry. 7. As you stand in my front hallway, waiting for my daughter to appear, and more than an hour goes by, do not sigh and fidget. If you want to be on time for the movie, you should not be dating. My daughter is putting on her makeup, a process that can take longer than painting the Golden Gate Bridge. Instead of just standing there, why don’t you do something useful, like changing the oil in my car? 8. The following places are not appropriate for a date with my daughter: Places where there are beds, sofas, or anything softer than a wooden stool. Places where there are no parents, policemen, or nuns within eyesight. Places where there is darkness. Places where there is dancing, holding hands, or happiness. Places where the ambient temperature is warm enough to induce my daughter to wear shorts, tank tops, midriff T-shirts, or anything other than overalls, a sweater, and a goose down parka - zipped up to her throat. Movies with a strong romantic or sexual theme are to be avoided; movies which features chain saws are okay. Hockey games are okay. Old folks homes are better. 9. Do not lie to me. On issues relating to my daughter, I am the all-knowing, merciless god of your universe. If I ask you where you are going and with whom, you have one chance to tell me the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth. I have a shotgun, a shovel, and five acres behind the house. Do not trifle with me. 10. Be afraid. Be very afraid. It takes very little for me to mistake the sound of your car in the driveway for a Black Hawk chopper coming in over a sand hill near Mogadishu. When my PTSD starts acting up, the voices in my head frequently tell me to clean the guns as I wait for you to bring my daughter home. As soon as you pull into the driveway you should exit your car with both hands in plain sight. Speak the perimeter password, announce in a clear voice that you have brought my daughter home safely and early, then return to your car - there is no need for you to come inside. The camouflaged face at the window is me. Hetalia fans will completely understand this: INTERNATIONAL ECONOMICS TRADITIONAL ECONOMICS You have two cows. You sell one and buy a bull. Your herd multiplies and the economy grows. You retire on the income. INDIAN ECONOMICS You have two cows. You worship them. PAKISTAN ECONOMICS You don't have any cows. You claim that the Indian cows belong to you. AMERICAN ECONOMICS You have two cows. You sell one and force the other to produce the milk of four cows. You profess surprise when the cow drops dead. You put the blame on some nation with cows & naturally that nation will be a danger to mankind. You wage a war to save the world and grab the cows. FRENCH ECONOMICS You have two cows. You go on strike because you want three cows. GERMAN ECONOMICS You have two cows. You reengineer them so that they live for 100 years, eat once a month and milk themselves. BRITISH ECONOMICS You have two cows. They are both mad cows. ITALIAN ECONOMICS You have two cows. You don't know where they are. You break for lunch. SWISS ECONOMICS You have 5000 cows, none of which belong to you. You charge others for storing them. JAPANESE ECONOMICS You have two cows. You redesign them so that they are one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow and produce twenty times the milk. You then create cute cartoon cow called Cowkimon and market them worldwide. RUSSIAN ECONOMICS You have two cows. You count them and learn you have five cows. You count them again and learn you have 42 cows. You count them again and learn you have 17 cows. You give up counting and open another bottle of vodka. CHINESE ECONOMICS You have two cows. You have 300 people milking them. You claim full employment, high bovine productivity and arrest anyone reporting the actual numbers. IRANIAN ECONOMICS You have two cows. You choose one of them as the leader of your country and the other one as the president. Hetalia Pledge I promise to remember Italy I promise to remember Germany I promise to remeber Japan I promise to remember America I promise to remember England I promise to remember France I promise to remember China I promise to remember Russia I promise to remember Lithuania I promise to remember Estonia I promise to remember Latvia I promise to remember Belarus I promise to remember Ukraine I promise to remember Sweden I promise to remember Finland I promise to remember Spain I promise to remember Romano I promise to remember Hungary I promise to remember Austria I promise to remember Prussia I promise to remember Poland I promise to remember Switzerland I promise to remember Liechtenstein I promise to remember Turkey I promise to remember Greece I promise to remember Egypt I promise to remember Canada I promise to remember Cuba I promise to remember Sealand I promise to remember Grandpa Rome I promise to remember Germania I promise to remember Holy Rome My name is Tiffany Month one Mommy Month Two Mommy Month Three You know what Mommy Month Four Mommy Month Five You went to the doctor today. Month Six I can hear that doctor again. Month Seven Mommy Every Abortion Is Just . . . One more heart that was stopped. If you're against abortion, re-post this and if you almost cried (or did cry) post this in your profile AWESOME THING TO DO 28 AWESOME WAYS TO MAKE YOUR TEACHER WANNA BACKHAND YOU!! 1. Walk into the classroom like a super spy. (Keep your back on the walls as you walk, point your finger up like a gun, look around with shifty eyes, hum the Mission Impossible theme, etc.) 2. After everything your teacher says, ask why continuously. 3. If your teacher is yelling at a classmate, wait for them to finish their tantrum then ask "Does somebody need a hug?” very loudly 4. If your teacher starts blowing up at you for saying that, simply reply, “Wow, I can tell you’re a blast at parties.” 5. Sit in a corner and wait for everyone to stare at you. When they do, scream “The light! Make it stop, it burns!" 6. Flick pieces of paper around the class. 7. When your teacher tells you to stop, cross your arms and say, “You're racist against paper aren't you.” 8. When your teacher asks you why you didn't do your homework say, “I dropped it while beating up this guy for saying you’re the worst teacher ever.” Then sit there and smile sweetly. 9. When you have a substitute teacher, wait for them to write their name on the board. Then when they say hello my name is Mr./Mrs (insert name here), you stand up and say “Prove it!” 10. When you leave the class bow and say, “May the force be with you, young one.” 11. When the teacher turns the light off, start singing opera as loud as you can. When they turn the light back on, look around pretending to be confused. 12. Come late to class in a Spider-Man costume; say there was "a disturbance” 13. Run in the room screaming, “THE WORLD IS GOING TO END!” 14. When the teacher asks you why you are late, say, “The queen is never late, everyone else is simply early." 15. When a teacher asks you a question, say, “I’m sorry, the brain you tried to reach has been disconnected, please leave me alone or try again later, thank you.” 16. Hide under your desk and yell “THE SKY IS FALLING!” 17. When someone knocks on the door, shout “OH NO, THEY’RE COMING FOR ME!” 18. Bring in a 4th Grader and says he’s your new pet. 19. In your technology lesson, when the teacher asks you what you are making, say a nuclear bomb. 20. Pull out one strand of someone’s hair and yell “DNA!” 21. Talk to a pen. 22. If you find a pencil on the floor, jump onto a desk, hold up the pencil, and yell, "LITTERING IS WRONG!! WHOEVER DROPPED THIS MUST BE PUNISHED!!" Then run around the room singing in a foreign language. 23. Draw a tiny black spot on your arm. Make it bigger every day. Look at it and say, “It’s spreading, IT’S SPREADING!” 24. When a substitute teacher is taking attendance, say everyone is missing. Then, if they ask who you are, say ‘Your worst Nightmare’ 25. While the teachers back is turned, everyone swaps seats! 26. If you are sure you haven't passed the test, write your phone number at the end with a heart! 27. When handing in your homework, write "This paper will self-destruct in 5 seconds." at the bottom. 28. When you hear a Police car siren from outside, run around screaming in the classroom shouting "Oh no, they're here. Oh my goodness. What do I do? Miss/Sir you have to help me! Oh goodness. They must have found the body! HELP!" Since I doubt you've made it this far into my profile, I don't feel bad about jumping on the stereotypes bandwagon. I SPEAK MY MIND, so I MUST be MEAN. (I try not to be mean; I just say things like they are) I'm a VIRGIN so I MUST be prude. (I will be a virgin until I marry and this goes along with the whole being a Christian thing.) I'm a GIRL who actually EATS LUNCH, so I MUST be fat. (Feel the power of pizza! Do you hear it? It's calling you...) I'm SINGLE so I MUST be ugly. I have ARTISTIC TALENT, so I MUST think little of those who don't. I'm SCOTTISH so I MUST have ginger hair and wear a skirts. (They're not skirts, they're kilts. There is a difference! But I do have reddish hair.) I'm GERMAN, so I must be a Nazi. (Oh please, Hitler deserved to be in a mental facility) I am AMERICAN so I MUST be obese, loud-mouthed and arrogant. I like GAMES, ANIME and COMICS, so I MUST be childish (debatable...) I’m ENGLISH, so I MUST speak with either a cockney or a posh accent and have bad teeth (um no but I can fake a "posh" accent.) I’m a CHRISTIAN, so I MUST hear crazy God voices in my head (*sigh* I am so tired of people using Christianity as an excuse to do things like kill people) I SPEAK GERMAN, so I MUST be a psycho Nazi (I can't really speak it but I know enough to probably get myself misunderstood and/or in trouble but then again I have the same problem with English) I’m a PERSON, so I MUST be labeled ( ..."A person" as opposed to what exactly? Is being a person optional? I wanna be a dragon!) You know you're obsessed with anime when... (Bolded are the ones I have) You know your obsessed with Hetalia when...bold apply 1. You start laughing hysterically at maps 2. You go "Aww" when you see two or more flags together 3. You've learned more history from it than from an actual history class 4. You debate about details like whether the number on America's back is supposed to be 50 or 96...with supporting screenshots 5. You watch APH MADs (Music videos/parodies) 6. You got a Nico Nico Douga account despite not knowing a single word of Japanese so you could watch even more APH MADs. 7. You dress up in a scarf and party hat and sit behind a receptionist's desk for Halloween. 8. World War II starts sounding romantic. 9. Your teacher asks why you put "Alfred F. Jones" as the answer instead of America, and why you drew a small heart and the name "Arthur" beside it. 10. You yell "Yeah, he's the hero!" whenever someone says America. 11. You misread UK as UKE every single time, and have started mispronouncing it in actual conversation. 12. You know every country's flag and location, and people think you must be a huge history nerd, and really, you've become one. 13. You shudder every time you hear the name "Russia" or "Ivan" and quickly glance over your shoulder...just in case. 14.Whenever you see a fellow Hetalia fan, you shout, "Pastaaaaaaaaa!!" down the hallway. 15. You write down your favorite pairings all over your history lecture notes, leaving others to wonder what *interject favorite pairing here* means. 16. You end every sentence with "aru". 17. You scream 'paaaaaaaaaastaaaaaaaaaaa' every time you happen to have some. 18. You can't imagine a functioning Italian mafia. 19. You want Prussia back on the map. 20. You can no longer say "international affairs" with a straight face. 21. No one can mention a country without you thinking about what they look like in Hetalia. 22. You read a historical book and think it would make a good fanfic. 23. Other people don't get it when you say your country's cute. 24. You've listened to Romano's Delicious Tomato Song like...80s billion time. 25. You're a duke/duchess of Sealand. 26. You've become a thousand times more patriotic 27. You remember Canada Day BEFORE the 4th of July, as in, you completely forget about America's birthday. (And you're American.) 28. You want to learn every single language in the world. Even the weird ones. 28. You recognize which flag belongs to which country, while everyone just looks at you funny. 29. Everyone who's named Alfred, Arthur, Peter, Matthew, or Francis are forever linked to Hetalia. 30. Scream "Pasta" at everyone who is eating some. FRIENDS: Never ask for anything to eat or drink. BEST FRIENDS: Helps themselves and are the reason why you have no food. FRIENDS: Call your parents by Mr. and Mrs. and Grandpa, by Grandpa. BEST FRIENDS:Call your parents DAD and MOM and Grandpa, GRAMPS! FRIENDS: Have never seen you cry. BEST FRIENDS: Won't tell everyone else you cried...just laugh about it with you in private when your not down anymore. FRIENDS: Asks you to write down your number. BEST FRIENDS: Have you on speed dial. FRIENDS: Borrows your stuff for a few days then gives it back. BEST FRIENDS: Loses your crap and tells you, "My bad...here's a tissue." FRIENDS: Only know a few things about you. BEST FRIENDS: Could write a very embarrassing biography on your life story... or can write a book about you with direct quotes from you. FRIENDS: Will leave you behind if that is what the crowd is doing. BEST FRIENDS: Will kick the whole crowd's butt that left you FRIENDS: Would knock on your front door. BEST FRIENDS: Walk right in and say "I'M HOME." FRIENDS:You have to tell them not to tell anyone. BEST FRIENDS: Already know not to tell. FRIENDS: Are only through high school/college. (aka: drinking buddies) BEST FRIENDS: Are for life. FRIENDS: Will be there to take your drink away from you when they think you've had enough. BEST FRIENDS:Will look at you stumbling all over the place & say "Dude drink the rest of that! You know we don't waste! FRIENDS:Will comfort you when the guy rejects you BEST FRIENDS:Will go up to him and say "It's because your gay isn't it?" Or "Seven days..." preferably both. FRIENDS: Will help me find my way when I'm lost. BEST FRIENDS: Will be the one messing with my compass, stealing my map and giving me bad directions FRIENDS:Will help me learn to drive. BEST FRIENDS: Will help me roll the car into the lake so I can collect insurance. FRIENDS: Will help me up when I fall down. BEST FRIENDS: Will point and laugh because she tripped me. FRIENDS: Will go to a concert with me. BEST FRIENDS: Will kidnap the band with me. FRIENDS: Hide me from the cops. BEST FRIENDS: Are probably the reason they’re after me in the first place. FRIENDS: Lets me make an idiot of myself in public. BEST FRIENDS: Are out there with me making an idiot out of themselves too. FRIENDS: Helps you find your prince. BEST FRIENDS: Kidnaps him and brings him to you. FRIENDS: Will ask you if you're okay when you're crying. BEST FRIENDS: Will laugh at you and say, "Ha Ha, Loser!" FRIENDS: Will offer you a soda. BEST FRIENDS: Will dump theirs on you. FRIENDS:Will sit at the side of the pool with you at that time of the month. BEST FRIENDS: Will throw you a tampon and push you in. FRIENDS: Gives you their umbrella in the rain. BEST FRIENDS: Takes yours and says, "Run girl run!" FRIENDS:Will help you move. BEST FRIENDS: Will help you move the bodies. FRIENDS: Say they're busy to listen to your problems, but when it comes to them they expect you to have all the time in the world REAL FRIENDS: Not only kick everything out of their schedule to listen to what's wrong, but help come up with vindictive plans to help you feel better FRIENDS: Say sorry when you want to talk to them at odd hours of the night, or even just hang out at odd hours REAL FRIENDS: Come right over and hang out with you, til you either fall asleep, or kick them out FRIENDS: Will take the knife, and leave you be. BEST FRIENDS: will take the knife, and do a strip check every day for the next 3 years FRIENDS: Would ignore this letter BEST FRIENDS: Will repost this thing!! A best friend can look at you when you have a smile on your face and ask "What's wrong?" Friends ask why you're crying, Best friends already have the shovel ready to bury the person who made you cry. Friends will be like, "You deserve better". Best friends will be prank calling him saying "You will die in several days." Our laughs are limitless. True Friends are hard to find, harder to leave, and impossible to forget Friendships are meant to stay together, without giving up on each other A Best friend is a person who walks in, when the world walks out. Hello and thank you for calling The State Mental Hospital. Please select from the following options: If you are obsessive-compulsive, press 1 repeatedly. If you are co-dependent, please ask someone to press 2 If you have multiple personalities, press 3, 4, 5 and If you are paranoid, we know who you are and what you If you are delusional, press 7 and your call will be If you are schizophrenic, listen carefully and If you are manic-depressive, it doesn't matter which If you are dyslexic, press 9696969696969696. If you are bipolar, please leave a message after the If you have short-term memory loss, press 9. If you If you have low self-esteem, please hang up our If you are menopausal, put the gun down, hang up, turn A True Boyfriend: When she walks away from you mad, follow her When she stares at your mouth, kiss her When she pushes you or hits you, grab her and don't let go When she starts cussing at you, kiss her and tell her you love her When she's quiet, ask her whats wrong When she ignores you, give her your attention When she pulls away, pull her back When you see her at her worst, tell her she's beautiful When you see her start crying, just hold her and don't say a word When you see her walking, sneak up and hug her waist from behind When she's scared, protect her When she lays her head on your shoulder, tilt her head up and kiss her When she steals your favorite hat, let her keep it and sleep with it for a night When she teases you, tease her back and make her laugh When she doesn't answer for a long time, reassure her that everything is okay When she looks at you with doubt, back yourself up When she says that she likes you, she really does more than you could understand When she grabs at your hands, hold hers and play with her fingers When she bumps into you, bump into her back and make her laugh When she tells you a secret, keep it safe and untold When she looks at you in your eyes, don't look away until she does When she misses you, she's hurtinginside When you break her heart, the pain never really goes away When she says it’s over, she still wants you to be hers When she reposts this bulletin, she wants you to read it When she's mad, hug her tight and don't let go When she says she's ok, don't believe it, talk with her- because 10 years later she'll remember you When she's bored and sad, hang out with her. Let her know she's important. Kiss her in the pouring rain. When she runs up at you crying, the first thing you say is; "Whose butt am I kicking, babe?" If you do post this in the next four minutes the one you love will: Guys post as: "I'd be this boyfriend." When a girl is quiet, a million things are running through her mind. When a girl is not arguing, she is thinking deeply. When a girl looks at you with her eyes full of question, she is wondering how long you will be around. When a girl answers "I'm fine." after a few seconds, she is not fine at all. When a girl stares at you, she is wondering why you are lying. When a girl rests her head on your chest, she is wishing for you to be her's forever. When a girl wants to see you everyday, she wants to be pampered. When a girl says "I love you." she means it. When a girl says "I miss you." nobody could miss you more than that. Life only comes around once, so make sure you spend it with the right person. Find a guy who calls you beautiful instead of hot, and calls you back when you hang up on him. The guy who will stay awake just to watch you sleep. Wait for the guy who kisses your forehead, Who wants to show you off to the world when you are in your sweats. The one who holds your hand in front of his friends and is constantly reminding you of how much he cares about you and how lucky he is to have you there for him. The one who turns to his friends and declares "That's her." If you can read this message, you are blessed because over two billion people in the world cannot read at all: I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid. Aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Amzanig huh? Yaeh and I awlyas toghuht slpeling was ipmorantt! tahts so cool! If you could read that put it in your profile! Love vs. Sex A teenage girl about 17 had gone to visit She ended up staying longer than As she walked along under the tall elm When she reached the alley, which was a However, halfway down the alley she She became uneasy and began to pray, Instantly a comforting feeling of quietness When she reached the end of the alley, The following day, she read in the Feeling overwhelmed by this tragedy and Thanking the Lord for her safety and to She felt she could recognize the man, so The police asked her if she would be She agreed and immediately pointed out When the man was told he had been The officer thanked Diane for her bravery She asked if they would ask the man one Diane was curious as to why he had not When the policeman asked him, he Amazingly, whether you believe or not, Repost this as Love vs. Sex if you truly 5 Truths of Life. 1. You cannot touch all of your teeth with your tongue 2. All idiots, after reading the first truth, try it 3. The first truth is a lie 4. You're smiling right now because you know you fell for it... 5. You still have a stupid smile lingering on your face Now, if you fell for it (I KNOW you did), copy & paste this into your profile 5 Truths of life: 1. You can kiss your elbow 2. You are now thinking you are not falling for that one again 3. You think you're so smart 4. The fact is that that is a lie 5. You are now trying to kiss your elbow YOU KNOW YOU'RE AN AUTHOR IF... You talk to yourself a lot. (A lot meaning all the time...) You talk to yourself about talking to yourself. (ie 'Why do I constantly ask my self random things?') When you talk to yourself you often talk to yourself like you're talking to someone else. (ie 'Have you ever noticed that deliver could mean someone's liver?') After uttering a profound piece of wisdom like that above, you stare at the cookie in your hand with awe and say, "Wow, this stuff is great for sugar highs...' You live off of sugar and caffeine (the two greatest things ever discovered!) You'll check your e-mail every day of the week and then disappear off the face of the earth. You're e-mails tend to be pages long and incredibly random. When replying to an e-mail, you'll never actually address the point of it. You tend to collect Bic Sticks off the ground like picking pennies off the ground. No matter where you are in a room you never have to get up to find a pen/pencil and paper. The letters on your keyboard are wearing off. Your friends and family think that you have carpal tunnel syndrome. People think you have A.D.D. You think it'd be cool to have A.D.D. You constantly start talking in third person, present or past tense. You start thinking about making lists like this and start giggling for no "apparent" reason Your friends stopped looking at you funny for no apparent reason a loooooong time ago. And FINALLY, the one way to tell if you're a good writer: You failed English 101. (copy that into you're profile if you fit one or more of these descriptions) THIS IS NOT MY POEM! TRY NOT TO CRY: This poem is to remember the students of Columbine, Virginia Tech, and all the other kids who were shot in school shootings and never got to say goodbye. By reposting this in your bio, you are making sure they are never forgotten. Copy this into your profile, choose the month you were born, copy and paste that above the "Months" chart, Italicize anything that doesn't suite you, boldones that really suite you well. OCTOBER: MONTHS JANUARY: FEBRUARY: MARCH: APRIL: MAY: JUNE: JULY: AUGUST: SEPTEMBER: OCTOBER: NOVEMBER: DECEMBER: If you believe in Jesus Christ put this in your profile and don't just ignore this, because in the Bible it says, ‘If you deny me, I will deny you in front of my Father in the gates of Heaven. 98 OF TEENS WON'T STAND UP FOR GOD... REPOST THIS iF YOU'RE ONE OF THE 2 WHO WILL. (I pray I am but I'll need all my courage, God!) FANFICTION- UNITED NATIONS! Has anyone else noticed how a lot of us get along and make friends on here and we can be from completely different countries? What. The. Heck. We're here making world peace on the INTERNET and we have all those ambassadors and senators and whatever struggling with it! If you realize this (or read this and agreed) copy and paste this and add your name and country (country is optional) to the list. SPREAD THE PEACE!: Naruto-fan-Okami-chan (USA), DGMSilverAirHead03(USA), Crystal Amethyst (Armenia), InoueR0xO (Pakistan), poohxebony (USA), DreamingInThePast (Spain), loves2readandwrite (USA), SeaDevil (Sweden), Vampgal212 (U.K.), Verdigurl (New Zealand), Animerockchic (Republic of Ireland), AzamiBlossom (USA), hopeofabrightfuture (USA) Which Hetalia character are you? The Axis Powers North Italy (Feliciano Vargas) [ ]You were bullied a lot in your childhood. [x]You adore pasta, pizza, cheese, and fruit. [x]You're very happy-go-lucky. [x]You constantly have a dozy look on your face as if you're always away with the fairies. [x]You have a long curly strand of hair that always tends to stick up. [ ]You're a good artist. [x]You can be clumsy at times. [x]You have a friend you always depend upon if you mess up something. [x]If your life was in danger, you would do the typical Italian thing and say: "PLEASE DON'T KILL ME! I HAVE RELATIVES IN YOUR COUNTRY!" [x]You would surrender in a war situation. (Well I wouldn't get into a war situation to begin with but if I was saving a comrad then the enemy better watch out) (8/10) (Yay! But I'm not Italian...) Germany (Ludwig Beilschmidt) [x]You're very stoic and serious. (when I need to be) [x]Sausages are your favorite foods. (They're good) [x]You like to walk your dog. [x]Your boss/principal/tutor/home-room teacher is a nut-case. (My homeroom teacher is my mom...) [ ]You love rules and think they should always be followed. [ ]You think the world would be better if everyone played by the rules. [x]You blush easily. (You have no idea) [x]You work very hard. (sometimes) [x]Your alone time is your 'happy time'. (nope, that's my anime time but I like to be alone when I watch anime) [x]You can appear tough but be very considerate towards people. [ ]You've had issues with money once or twice. [x] Family comes first (always) (9/12) (Not bad, not bad at all) Japan (Kiku Honda) [x]You're very mature (sometimes, when I'm around adults but put me with kids... I'd be fifteen going on five) [ ]You think everything over before saying it. (Personally I think that I was born without the little filter between the brain and mouth that prevents you from speaking anything that comes into your head) [x]You believe in ghosts but aren't phased by the experience when you see one. [ ]You isolated yourself during childhood. [ ]You became very successful in a short amount of time. [x]You are somewhat inexperienced when it comes to the outside world. [ ]You can seem cold/aloof to other people. [x]You're good at practical tasks. [ ] You need time to adjust to new people . (4/10) (Well, I already knew that I'm not Asian) The Allied Forces The United States of America (Alfred F. Jones) [x]You love hamburgers. [x]You think you're awesome. [x]You love to invent things. (The ideas come easily but getting them to work is another story) [x]You love going to the cinema/watching films/making films. [ ]You can seem to be very brash to other people. [ ]You have a tendency to stick your nose into other peoples' business. [ ]You're terrified of ghosts. [x]You know aliens exist. [ ]You tend to wear a bomber jacket all the time. [ ]You wear glasses. (5/10) (um... well American isn't actually a nationality so...) England (Arthur Kirkland) [ ]You like tea. (Yuck!) [x]You were quite tough as a kid. [x]You're very sarcastic and cynical. [ ]Your cooking is awful. [x]You love spiritual magical stuff, such as fairies, ghosts... [ ]...But you refuse to believe in aliens. [ ]You have tried doing black magic before. [ ]You get drunk quite easily. (can't drink...yet) [ ]When you are drunk, you tend to be very unhappy. (again, haven't tried) [ ]You're good at embroidery. (3/10) (Genetics are on vacation) France (Francis Bonnefoy) [x]You're very affectionate. [ ]You think you have a great fashion sense. [x]You like wine. (I like to make jokes about it...) [ ]You're the master of whispering romantic things into peoples' ears. [x]You love red roses. [ ]When it comes to l'amour, you don't mind men or women. [x]You're very proud of yourself. [x]You love culture and the arts. [ ]You're very flamboyant. [ ]You say you're a gourmet. (5/10) (Oh dear God, please no) Russia (Ivan Braginski) [ ]You had a very sad childhood. [x]You're very tall. (For a girl anyway...) [x]You have a tendency to switch between personalities. [x]You wear a scarf all the time. (Not all the time but I have been known to wear one) [x]You love sunflowers. [x]You love vodka. (I like the idea of vodka, I'm underage people) [x]You can seem intimidating to other people. [x]You're very strong. [ ]You have a big nose . [x]You have a strange laugh that can scare people. (8/10) (Oh the irony, and he's the one that's scares me the most) China (Wang Yao) [x]You're very mature. (When I'm supposed to be) [x]You're very superstitious. [x]You're very religious. (It's not religion, it's a relationship) [x]You love pandas. [ ]You love cooking so much that you nag if food has a certain pattern of tastes. [ ]You love Hello Kitty. [x]You try to be a role-model for your brothers/sisters/whatever, but are never taken seriously. [x]You work hard. (most of the time) [ ]You're good at drawing. [x]You like sweets. (7/10) (Again not Asian) And now for some other country people!! Austria (Roderich Edelstein) [x]You are very well-raised. [x]You're polite. [x]You love classical music. [x]You like cake. [x]You have a mole on your face. [x]You dedicate your time to your hobbies rather than what needs to be done right away. [ ]You are a virtuoso/play very well on at least one instrument. [x]You've composed music before. (yeah but it sucked) [x]You tend to call people 'morons'. [x]You wear glasses. (I do but they're just glass) (9/10) (Well I just recently found out I am Austrian so this makes sense.) Canada (Matthew Williams) [ ]You're often ignored by people. [ ]You look younger than you actually are. [ ]You love hockey. [ ]You love polar bears. [ ]You hate fighting. (not!) [x]You have one strand of curly hair, like Italy. [ ]You often get mistaken for someone else. [ ]You feel under-appreciated [x]You're bilingual. (I can't speak any language well but I can speak bits of many) [ ]You always carry a bear with you. (2/10) (again not a nationality) Hungary (Elizaveta Hédeváry) [ ]You have a potty-mouth. [x]You like to wear flowers in your hair. [x]You used to be a very tough kid. (I still am!) [x]You're very reliable. [x]It's better to have you as a friend rather than an enemy. [x]You're very faithful. (to my friends) [x]Your speech and mannerisms can be considered very unladylike. (tomboy and proud!) [ ]You and your best friend go together like chalk and cheese. (...?) [x]You are graceful one moment and grinning like a maniac the next. [ ]If someone yells that yaoi is going on somewhere, you will drop everything to run off to go and see it. (7/10) (She's awesome! *attacked by a wild Prussia*) Lithuania (Toris Lorinaitis) [x]You're very loyal. [ ]You feel like your best friend drags you around a lot, but you both have a great time together. [ ]You're very serious. [x]You have a lot of patience. (depends on the situation...) [x]You think too much about philosophical stuff. [ ]You get depressed when questioning the point of existing/the universe, etc... [ ]You're not very confident. [ ]You were quite rebellious as a child. [ ]People tend to walk all over you. [ ]You're a born worrier. (3/10) (Nope) Poland (Feliks Lucasiewocz) [ ]You're very flamboyant. [x]You're quite hyperactive. [x]You can be quite goofy. [x]When you're depressed, you tend to rise out of it like a phoenix. [ ]You're very wary of strangers. [ ]It takes you ages to come out of your shell. [ ]However, when you're used to someone, you're very chatty. [x]You're very forceful and stand at one end of the argument when it comes to your opinions. [x]You love pansies and corn-poppies. (flowers in general really...) [x]You get up to lots of crazy antics. (6/10) (Whoa, I like, didn't expect that) Prussia (Gilbert Beillschmidt) [ ]You're quite mean-spirited. [x]You're a bit of a hooligan. [x]You're very loyal. [x]You're very good at tactics. [x]You "hate" Russia. (not hate, scared) [ ]You love to fight people. [x]You can avoid marriages quite well. (um... so far yeah) [x]You're not always taken seriously. [x]You like drinking. (I'm underage people but yeah.) [x]You want to become stronger. [x]You are awesome! (Got that right) [x]Family comes first. (10/12) (well Prussia is related to Germany, hope is once again ignited in my heart) Spain (Antonio Fernandez Carriedo) [x]You are clueless about things around you. [x]You favor the taste of fresh tomatoes. [x]You're very responsible. [x]You tend to dramatize over things a lot. [x]You love churros. [x]You help people in crisis. [x]You are quite random. ("quite" doesn't even begin to cover it) [x]Somehow, you like bananas. (...why wouldn't I?) [x]You often offer food to people. [x]You have a sort of unhealthy obsession over a couple of brothers... (10/10) (...am I Hispanic? I'm Portuguese but I know that's not the same thing...) South Italy (Lovino Vargas) [ ]You tend to overreact a lot. [ ]You like to order people around. [ ]You're a scaredy-cat. [ ]You curse a lot. [ ]You go drama depressed when people ignore you. [x]You tend to blush easily. [x]You are freakishly lazy. [x]You love tomatoes a lot. [x]You fix yourself on stupid matters. [ ]You get defensive at the slightest comment. (4/10) (...Well I could have done better...) DENMARK [ ] PEOPLE SAY YOU’RE LOUD AND ANNOYING. [x] YOU THINK YOU’RE GOD’S GIFT TO THE WORLD. (In a joking way) [x] YOU’RE A LEADER. [ ] YOU THINK YOU ARE GOOD LOOKING. [ ] YOU’RE THE OLDEST IN YOUR FAMILY. [X] YOU’RE CHILDISH. [ ] YOU’RE THE CENTER OF ATTENTION. [ ] YOU’RE VERY BOSSY. [ ] YOU DON’T GET ALONG WITH OTHERS. [X] YOU CAN BE STUBBORN AT TIMES. TOTAL: 4 (...I'm not sure if I'm happy or sad. I am Dane though.) NORWAY: [x] PEOPLE SAY YOU’RE CRANKY. (Don't talk to me in the morning if you wish to see the morrow) [ ] YOU’RE VERY QUIET. [x] YOU ALWAYS WEAR SOME TYPE OF ACCESSORY. [x] WHEN YOU SPEAK, YOU TELL THINGS HOW THEY ARE. [x] YOU HAVE A SIBLING. [x] YOUR HAIR LOOKS LIKE ITALY’S CURL SOMETIMES. [ ] YOU DON’T LIKE TO SHOW EMOTION. [ ] YOU GET ANNOYED VERY EASILY. [x] YOU BELIEVE IN MAGIC. [ ] YOU ARE EXTREMELY SHY AROUND STRANGERS. TOTAL: 6 (Well I am Norwegian) Switzerland (Vash Zwingli) You stay neutral in thing no matter what ( ) You are reclusive ( ) You seem peaceful, but you'll fight if you have to (x) (Hurt my family and you die) You work hard on things until they're done (x) You can't get along friendly with other people ( ) But, you're kind towards siblings (x) You're actually quite strong (x) You have a lot of money ( ) You seem difficult to get along with, but you're actually kind and caring ( ) You had a hard past ( ) (4/10) Korea (Im Yong-Soo) You care a lot about your family (x) You love watching movies, and creating things (x) You're stronger than you seem (x) You're a Going-My-Way person (x) You love kimchi ( ) You're mysterious, and people can't tell what you're thinking ( ) You tend to annoy your elders ( ) You like to claim things as yours ( ) You love games and Internet (x) You're slightly perverted ( ) (5/10) Finland (Tino Väinämöinen) You love Christmas and Santa (x) You're honest and quiet (1/2) (I am honest) You are good at high-tech machinery (x) You like coming up with weird things (x) You sense of taste is bad, as people say (x) (if it's on my plate I will probably eat it) You tend to fight against people who are stronger than you ( ) You let people poke you around for a while, but then you get them back ten times worse (x) You love saunas (x) You're generous, but you also have a scary side as well (x) For some reason, you have weird naming skills (x) (8 1/2/10) Sweden (Berwald Oxenstierna) You don't talk much, and you tend to stay quiet ( ) You're honest, serious, and love debates (x) You're actually passionate, but you just don't show it ( ) People think you're scary ( ) You're clever with your hands (x) You make weapons with things that people don't imagine (x) You're clumsy with human relationships ( ) You tend to go against stronger people (x) You give up pretty quick ( ) In the inside, you're smiling. On the outside, you're glaring ( ) (4/10) ICELAND: [x] EVEN IF YOU WON’T ADMIT IT, YOU LOVE YOUR FAMILY. [ ] YOU HAD/HAVE A PET BIRD. [x] YOU LOVE LICORICE. [x] YOU’RE VERY PASSIONATE ABOUT THINGS. [x] YOU’RE THE YOUNGEST [ ] YOU WANT TO BE A GROWN UP. [x] YOU GET EMBARRASSED EASILY. [x] YOU ARE MODEST. [ ] YOU HAVE A SHORT TEMPER. [ ] YOU DON’T LIKE CHILDISH THINGS. TOTAL: 6 (...Okay then...) Hetalia meme challenge! 1. Your favorite character: Italy or Germany 2. Your least favorite character: I guess I'll have to say Seychelles. I don't know why... 3. Character you'd date: Italy, Prussia, Romano, or Germany 4. Character you'd like to go shopping with: Hungary because I hate shopping and she has a frying pan 5. Character you'd like as your child: ...Can I have them all? 6. Character who would probably be your rival: Belarus or Austria 7. Character you have most in common with: Italy 8. Character you look like the most: Fem!Italy or Hungary 9. Character you'd bring home to your parents: Italy or Germany 10. Character you'd never bring home to your parents: Romano or France 11. Character you'd become best friends with: Hungary or Belguim 12. Character with your favorite voice/seiyuu: *shrugs* Russia and Chibitalia. 13. Character you'd go camping with: Canada or America 14. Character you wouldn't mind being roommates with: Germany and Spain 15. Character you'd want to cook for you: Italy or Germany 16. Character you wouldn't mind prancing naked for you: O_O Um... that's akward 17. Your OTP: PruHun 18. Character you wouldn't mind having as a parent: Spain, Romano, Italy or Germany 19. Character you'd like to go karaoke with: Germany or Prussia 20. Character you wouldn't mind having as your butler/maid: *shrugs* 21. Five characters you'd invite to a party: Italy, Prussia, America, Germany, Hungary 22. Another OTP of yours: GermanyxFem!Italy or HRExFem!Chibitalia 23. Your favorite character of the opposite gender: Italy 24. Character with your favorite uniform/outfit: Prussia in his priest outfit. 25. Character who would be your band-mate if you were in a band: Prussia and Romano 26. Character you wouldn't mind having as your boss: Germany I guess 'cause he'd push me to better myself and get my job done 27. Character you wouldn't want to run into in a dark alley: Russia, France... 28. Character you'd want personified into a dog: Germany 29. Character you'd want personified into a cat: Italy 30. Character you'd want to cosplay as: Fem!Italy, Hungary, Belgium FOR GIRLS: YOUR GUY SIDE: You love hoodies. You love jeans. Dogs are better than cats. (I like all animals equally ;) It's hilarious when people get hurt. You've played with/against boys on a team. Shopping is torture. (unless it's for books or something like that) Sad movies suck. You own/ed an X-Box. Played with Hotwheel cars as a kid. At some point in time you wanted to be a firefighter. You own/ed a DS, PS2 or Sega. You used to be obsessed with Power Rangers. You watch sports on TV. Gory movies are cool. You go to your dad for advice. You own like a trillion baseball caps (um I have two my dad has the rest so he doesn't notice when I borrow one or five) You like going to high school football games. You used to/do collect football/baseball/pokemon cards. (pokemon baby!) Baggy pants are cool to wear. It's kinda weird to have sleepovers with a bunch of people. Green, red, blue, or silver are one of your favorite colors. You love to go crazy and not care what people think. Sports are fun. Talk with food in your mouth. Sleep with your socks on at night 18/25 (Yeah tomboys forever!) YOUR GIRL SIDE: You wear lip gloss/stick. 1. YOUR REAL NAME: Kyla 2. YOUR GANGSTA NAME (first 3 letters of real name plus izzle); Kylizzle 3. YOUR DETECTIVE NAME: (fav color and fav animal): Blue Dragon 4. YOUR SOAP OPERA NAME: (Middle name and current street name): Rose Golden 5. YOUR STAR WARS NAME (The first 3 letters of your last name, first 2 letters of your first name, last 3 letters of your mom's maiden name): Ewiklead 6. YOUR SUPERHERO NAME: (2nd favorite color, favorite drink): Green/Silver Sprite or Green Rootbeer 7. YOUR ARAB NAME: (2nd letter of your first name, 3rd letter of your last name, any letter of your middle name, 2nd letter of your moms maiden name, 3rd letter of your dads middle name, 1st letter of your siblings first name, last letter of your moms middle name): Yisrnte 8. YOUR WITNESS PROTECTION NAME: (Your mothers madien name) Armstead 9: YOUR GOTH NAME: (Black and the name of your pet) Black Homer SO TRUE QUOTES: (BOLD the ones you really agree one C;.) S.c.h.o.o.l: Seven Crappy Hours Of Our Lives. School for 12 years, College for 4 years, Work until you die.. Great. Sometimes I wish I could be like the white crayon in the box. That way, no one would ever use me. I don't smoke, there are cooler ways to die. There is a "lie" in believe, "over" in lover, "end" in friend, "us" in trust, and "if" in life. Oh so you can join the army when your 16, but you have to be 21 to drink? If 2012 does begin to happen ..We'll just have Kanye interrupt it People say you can't live without love.. I think oxygen is more important XD When women are depressed they either eat or go shopping. Men invade another country. If you can't convince them, confuse them. My imaginary friend thinks you have a very serious problem... Yes, I hit like a girl. You could too if you hit a bit harder. When in danger, when in doubt, run in circles, scream and shout. Perfect men are only fictional. Death is God's way of saying you're fired. Suicide is man's way of saying you can't fire me, I quit. Don’t knock on death’s door. Ring the bell and run. He hates that. I don't suffer from insanity; I enjoy every minute of it. Remember: Some people are alive only because it's illegal to shoot them. I used to have a handle on life, but it broke. Don't take life too seriously; No one gets out alive. You're just jealous because the voices only talk to me. Earth is the insane asylum for the universe. Out of my mind. Back in five minutes Consciousness: That annoying time between naps. A picture is worth a thousand words, but it uses up three thousand times the memory. The trouble with life is there's no background music. I smile because I don't know what the heck is going on. It’s always in the last place you look...of course it is, why the heck would I keep looking after I found it? -If you're gonna be two-faced, sweetie at least make one of them pretty. -All work and no play means you will die in seven days... dun dun duuun -I run with scissors; it makes me feel dangerous -Kids are the future. Be afraid. Be very afraid. -So, if guns kill people, can I blame misspelled words on my pencil? -Yeah, I’m a loser. but the coolest loser you'll ever meet -Save the earth. it's the only planet with chocolate. -I've heard that it’s possible to grow up. I've just never met anyone who's actually done it. (Besides, what’s the fun in that?) -No I won't go to hell! It has a restraining order against me -When Life gives you lemons, throw them back, because I mean really? who likes lemons? -When Life gives you lemons, squirt them in Life's eye, and see how much Life likes lemons then. -Oops! did my sarcasm hurt your feelings? -I used to have an open mind, but my brains kept falling out -I'm gonna give him a piece of my mind! but not my brain. I need that. -Life isn’t passing me by; it's trying to run me over -Smile; it makes people wonder what you're up to -I talk to myself because my answers are the only ones I accept! -Therapy is expensive. popping bubble wrap is cheap... you decide -I like the idea of karma. you can go around and do bad things to people all day assuming they deserve it -If olive oil comes from olives, where the does baby oil come from? -Isn't it funny how the word 'politics' is made up of the words 'poli' meaning many and 'tics' as in the bloodsucking creatures? (*Dies laughing*) -If everything seems to be going well, you've obviously overlooked something -Education is important. School however, is another matter. -I used to be normal... until I met those freaks I call my friends (More like until they met me...) -It's not just your family. It's the whole idea of... you know. they're always telling you what to do and what not to do, and its not conductive to a creative atmosphere! Don't you dare tell me the sky is the limit when there are footsteps on the moon. "An apple a day keeps the doctor away, if well aimed." (Wait, I don't want to keep the Doctor away! *Runs after the TARDIS* Come back!) Amateurs built the ark. Professionals built the Titanic... Quote Time! There are three rules for writing the novel. Unfortunately, no one knows what they are. -Somerset Maugham “I have hated words and I have loved them, and I hope I have made them right.” -Markus Zusak, The Book Thief Now the truth of the matter is that there are a lot of things that people don't understand. Take the Einstein theory. Take taxes. Take love. Do you understand them? Neither do I. But they exists. They happen. -Dalton Trumbo Me I'm dishonest, and you can always trust a dishonest man to be dishonest, honestly, it's the honest ones you have to watch out for because you never know when they're going to do something incredibly stupid. -Captain Jack Sparrow I believe that if life gives you lemons, you should make lemonade... And try to find somebody whose life has given them vodka, and have a party. -Ron White "Don't be afraid your life will end; be afraid that it will never begin." "Do not dare not to dare." -Aslan, The Horse and His Boy "Accept that some days you are the pigeon, and some days you are the statue." -David Brent "To dream of the person you would like to be is to waste the person you are." -Author unknown "War's one of those things, don't you think, where everyone always thinks they're in the right have you noticed that? Nobody ever says we're the bad guys, we're going to beat crap out of the good guys." -Caryl Churchill "All wars are civil wars because all men are brothers." -Francois Fenelon "Success isn't a result of spontaneous combuston. You must set yourself on fire." -Arnold H. Glasow "You cannot be lonely if you like the person you're alone with." -Wayne Dryer "War doesn't determine who's right-only who's left." -Brent Russel "The eyes shout what the lips fear to say." — Henry Wilson Allen "My luck is so bad that if I bought a cemetery, people would stop dying." - Ed Furgol "Be yourself. Everyone else is taken." - Oscar Wilde "I like work: it fascinates me. I can sit and look at it for hours." - Jerome K. Jerome "Everything will be okay in the end. If it's not okay, it's not the end." - Unknown Copy and paste this to your profile and add something to the list! · What does not kill you will ultimately make you stronger. · Living might mean taking chances, but they're worth taking. · Don't show off driving, if you want to race go to Indianapolis. · Excuses never please anyone but the person giving them. · Those who stand for nothing fall for anything. · There are no shortcuts to any place worth going. · Don't let what others think decide who you are. · Stand up for what is right, even if you are standing alone. · You can know someone better in a moment of honesty than you ever can in a lifetime of lies. · Don't let your life wait for other people. · Dropping a cellular phone in a bathtub full of water kinda will kill the phone. · Your mother will find out if you dye your hair purple. · Don't ever fall in love with someone more than 1,000 miles away, it usually doesn't work. · If it hurts, DON'T DO IT AGAIN! · If you fall on your friends roller blades and end up with a huge scar on your leg from falling, don't use the same friends roller blades again when you have brand new pants on! · Speaking in public gets easier with practice. · Don't do cheers off a diving board. · Ten years from now (or sometimes even next year) what we freak out about or are embarrassed by won't matter. · Zits always pop up when you really can't afford for them to pop up. · When in doubt, duck. When certain don't bother, cause you're already screwed. · If your teacher tells you to quit talking after a test or he'll give you a zero for the test grade, he means it. Really. · Sometimes smart people can do very, very stupid things. · Nothing is ever too good to be true. · Instead of waiting for life to get better, do something about it. · You REALLY should do what needs to be done NOW, and not later. Procrastination is the easiest way, but not the most profitable. · If your intuition is telling you not to do something, then don't. Your intuition is not stupid! · If he doesn't respect you, he's not worth any of your time. · Sticking things up your nose isn't the smartest idea in the world. · You can't light fireworks in the basement and not get caught. · Hair is flammable. VERY flammable. · Never ever trust your friend with a scissors against your hair. · White cats/dogs don't mix with black clothes. · Someday you will look back on this and it will all seem funny. · You never know when you're making a memory. · If you can laugh at yourself, you are going to be fine. · If you allow others to laugh with you, you'll be GREAT! · Kissing is the most fun thing. Dancing is almost as fun. · Chose your friends carefully, you are what they are. · There are two kinds of people in this world... Those that play hopscotch and sing in the shower, and those that lie alone at night with tears in their eyes. Everyone has a choice as to which we want to be... and everyone is a little of both. · Milk crates make boring pets. · Never pierce your belly button in the dark... Or with a safety pin. · Never, ever, EVER let someone of the opposite sex make you compromise your standards. Never. · Truly anything is possible when you follow your heart. The sky is no longer the limit. · God doesn't make junk. · Mistakes... We all make them. Sometimes if we're lucky, an eraser will do the trick, we can rub it across the page, wipe away the dust, and all that's left of our careless mess is a hardly noticeable smudge. But some mistakes can't be erased, no matter how old or young we are. · When you're 14 and don't even have your temps don't try driving... Especially when all your friends are around watching. · Dance like no one is watching. · Write like no one is gonna read your words. · BE YOURSELF. It's hard to be someone else anyway. · Don't say something you wouldn't want your parents, God, or your crush to hear. · Even before you say sorry (volunteer or otherwise), think about how you would feel in their shoes. THEN you can properly say sorry. · If you find out your boyfriend has been cheating on you, don’t go up to him in public, yell at him, and then slap him; It will make both of you look bad. Alternative: Talk with him, alone. And if you find out that he’s been cheating on you for more than a month, slap him as hard as you damn well can. - Storm Midnight · Never jump over a hurdle without experience or supervision, It hurts! -True strength is being able to hold it all together when everyone else expects you to fall apart. -The longest journey begins with a single step. -Keep safe and defend mean the same thing, it's just people that use defend want to be fancy. So stick your tongue out at the "fancy people"! · When you fail, trying to do the same thing over an over again and expecting it to work is a sign of insanity. · There are 2 types of people in this world, the kind that stand in the shadows hoping that someone else will fix their problems for them or the kind that makes a stand and does something about it. Who are you? · Nothing is impossible unless you give up. - Before you tick someone off, walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you DO tick them off, you'll be a mile away and have their shoes. - Live life to the fullest. One day you won't be able to. I didn’t fall. The floor just needed a hug. It's not a hard as you thought, it's harder than you ever imagined it could be. But it's worth it. What do you mean, my birth certificate expired? In the primary school, I was an outstanding student. My teacher would send me to stand outside of the class as a punishment. Don’t let your mind wander, Its too little to be let out alone. I don’t have a license to kill. I have learners permit! God grant me the serenity to accept that people are ignorant, the courage to uphold the law when I’m hostile, & the wisdom to realize that murder is illegal. I dream of a better tomorrow, where chickens can cross the road and not be questioned about their motives. Learn the rules so you know how to properly break them You have enemies? Good. That means you stood up for something sometime in your life. No matter how old you are, no matter how much of a bad person you think you are, if a toddler hands you their ringing toy phone, you answer it. I will only stop being your friend when a mute guy tells a deaf guy that a blind guy saw a legless guy walk on water. Dear McDonald's Cashier, Stop looking at me like that. Last time i checked, there were no age limits for Happy Meals. Sincerely, Don't Forget The Toy If you're gunna embarrass yourself, do it right! Dear Humans, Remember when your parents told you we were more afraid of you, then you were of us? We're not. Sincerely, Spiders Everyone thinks a girl's dream is to find the perfect guy... pfffttttt! Yeah right! Our dream is to eat without getting fat. 10 years. Trillions of dollars. Thousands of soldiers dead. State of the art technology. The US finally found Bin Laden... in his house. Yes, I do smile stupidly at the computer when someone says something cute. You get home from school. There is a giant box in the front living room with the word 'FRAGILE' on it. This can only mean one thing... BUBBLE WRAP! Me: Can I use the bathroom? Teacher: I don't know, can you? Me: When I was using "can" I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier asking for permission, as opposed to expressing an ability. I thought since you were a teacher, you would know that. Oh well, I guess I'll do it your way. May I go to the bathroom? Teacher: ... Children don't care whether a person is a girl or a boy, black or white, pretty or ugly, different or the same. They will be friends simply because they get along. Children don't care about politics or religion. And yet they say adults are wiser. Nobody can go back and start a new beginning... but anyone can start today and make a new ending. You can't buy happiness, but you can buy ice cream, and they're pretty much the same thing. PUT THIS ON YOUR PROFILE- if you have ever listened to music in another language, and sang along having no IDEA what they are SAYING and PROUD OF IT!! You laugh at me because I'm crazy, I laugh at you because there's an invisible leprechaun sitting on your shoulder. Other stuff Belgium is a country invented by the British to annoy the French- Charles de Gaulle, President of France (1959 to 1969) I'm an idealist. I don't know where I'm going, but I'm on my way. -Carl Sandburg Wine is constant proof that God loves us and loves to see us happy. -Benjamin Franklin I cook with wine, sometimes I even add it to the food. -W. C. Fields I am not a member of any organized political party. I am a Democrat. -Will Rogers You can lead a man to Congress, but you can't make him think. -Milton Berle Frisbeetarianism is the belief that when you die, your soul goes up on the roof and gets stuck. -George Carlin A pessimist is a person who has had to listen to too many optimists. -Don Marquis Tragedy is when I cut my finger. Comedy is when you fall into an open sewer and die. -Mel Brooks My definition of an intellectual is someone who can listen to the William Tell Overture without thinking of the Lone Ranger. -Billy Connolly Money won't buy happiness, but it will pay the salaries of a large research staff to study the problem. -Bill Vaughan I have tried to know absolutely nothing about a great many things, and I have succeeded fairly well. -Robert Benchley Nobody ever went broke underestimating the taste of the American public. -H. L. Mencken When we talk to God, we're praying. When God talks to us, we're schizophrenic. -Jane Wagner When I eventually met Mr. Right I had no idea that his first name was Always. -Rita Rudner When I was a boy the Dead Sea was only sick. -George Burns I've always wanted to go to Switzerland to see what the army does with those wee red knives. -Billy Connolly What contemptible scoundrel has stolen the cork to my lunch? -W. Clement Stone The brain is a wonderful organ. It starts working the moment you get up and does not stop until you get into the office. -? Girls have an unfair advantage over men: If they can’t get what they want by being smart, they can get it by being dumb. -Yul Brynner We must believe in luck. For how else can we explain the success of those we don’t like? -Jean Cocturan I saw six men kicking and punching the mother-in-law. My neighbor said ‘Are you going to help?’ I said, ‘No, Six should be enough. -Les Dawson To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first. And, whatever you hit, call it the target. -Ashleigh Brilliant They’ve finally come up with the perfect office computer. If it makes a mistake, it blames another computer. -Milton Berle Avoid fruits and nuts. You are what you eat. -Jim Davis A young man fills out an application for a job and does well until he gets to the last question, “Who Should we notify in case of an accident?” He mulls it over and then writes, “Anybody in sight!” -Milton Berle “Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit; Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.” - Brian Gerald O’Driscoll Show me a sane man and I will cure him for you. -Carl Gustav Jung Arguing about whether the glass is half full or half empty misses the point, which is this: the bartender cheated you! -Unknown After one look at this planet any visitor from outer space would say “I WANT TO SEE THE MANAGER.”. -William S. Burroughs Some people come into our lives and leave footprints on our hearts, while others come into our lives and make us wanna leave footprints on their face. -Unknown When I was born … the doctor came out to the waiting room and said to my father … I’m very sorry. We did everything we could … but he pulled through. -Rodney Dangerfield I don’t kill flies but I like to mess with their minds. I hold them above globes. They freak out and yell, ‘Whoa, I’m way too high!’ -Bruce Baum “You know the world is going crazy when the best rapper is a white guy, the best golfer is a black guy, the tallest guy in the NBA is Chinese, the Swiss hold the America’s Cup, France is accusing the U.S. of arrogance, Germany doesn’t want to go to war, and the three most powerful men in America are named after body parts.” - Chris Rock “If aliens are watching us through telescopes, they’re going to think the dogs are the leaders of the planet. If you see two life forms, one of them’s making a poop, the other one’s carrying it for him, who would you assume is in charge?” - Jerry Seinfeld “If women ran the world we wouldn’t have wars, just intense negotiations every 28 days.” - Robin Williams “Sometimes the road less traveled is less traveled for a reason.” - Jerry Seinfeld “Dogs have masters. Cats have staff.” - Unknown "Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died.” - Erma Bombeck Graduation Speech: I’d like to thank the internet, Google, Wikipedia, Microsoft Word, and Copy & Paste. We've just witnessed a classic example of what I like to call misdirected rage. I believe the technical term is "being an ass". -Shigure, Fruits Basket Last night, as I lay in bed looking up at the stars in the sky and thought to myself, "Where the heck is my ceiling?" Being different is one of the most beautiful things on earth. Embrace your "you"ness. -Anonymous Being called weird is like being called limited edition. It means you're something people don't see that often. Remember that. -lolsotrue #1785 Why fit in when you were born to stand out?- Dr. Seuss Being normal is abnormal. -Anonymous A leader is nothing without his followers. - SecretlyaBritishninja You can't question my sanity because I don't have any. - SecretlyaBritishninja When life gives me lemons, I make orange juice and leave the world to wonder how the heck I managed it. If all else fails, destroy all evidence that you tried. I don't suffer from insanity, I enjoy every minute of it. Two wrongs don't make a right, but they make a good excuse. Whoever said nothing is impossible never tried slamming a revolving door. The person who smiles when things go wrong has found someone to blame it on. Better to stay silent and be thought a fool than to speak and remove all doubt. Never argue with an idiot. They'll just drag you down to their level and beat you with experience. I'd tell you to go to hell, but I work there and really don't want to see you everyday. Someday, we'll look on this, laugh nervously and change the subject. I wondered why the frisbee was getting bigger, then it hit me. Normal people scare me... But not as much as I scare them. Even if the voices aren't real, they have some good ideas. If I had any dignity that would have been humiliating. Sanity? I never had such a useless thing to begin with! That which does not kill me had better run pretty dang fast. Curiosity killed the cat, but satisfaction brought it back. Stupidity killed the cat. Curiosity was framed. Being mature is overrated. Being weird is like being normal, only better. I'm not clumsy! The floor just hates me. Boys are like lava lamps, fun to watch but not too bright. Silence is golden, duct tape is silver Be insane . . . because well behaved girls never made history. My knight in shining armor turned out to be a loser in aluminum foil. One day your prince will come. Mine? Oh he took a wrong turn, got lost, and is too stubborn to ask for directions. A wise man once said, "Ask a girl." When in doubt, push random buttons! Fighting is mind over matter. I don't mind, and you don't matter. There's always a light at the end of the tunnel. Of course, it's usually an oncoming express train. There are three kinds of people. Those who learn by reading, a few who learn by observation, and the rest who have to test the electric fence for themselves. They say guns don't kill people; people do. Well, I think guns help. I mean, if you just stood there and yelled 'BANG!' I don't think you'd kill many people... Just when I think you've said the stupidest thing ever you just keep on talking. You know, you do this annoying thing where you open your mouth and then these things you call words come out. Yeah, like that. Stop it. He who laughs last thinks slowest. An idiot is a 44th floor window washer who steps back to admire his work. I'm not cynical, everything just sucks. I respect your opinion, I just think its stupid. It's not denial. I’m just selective about the reality I accept. They say hard work never hurts anybody, but why take the chance. Why be difficult, when with just a little bit of effort, you can be impossible? Ask me no questions and I’ll tell you no lies. Everyone has a photographic memory, some just don't have film. A clear conscience is usually a sign of memory loss. There are no stupid questions, just a lot of inquisitive idiots. The secret to success is sincerity. Once you can fake that you’re good. I'm not as dumb as you look. The newscaster is the person who says "Good evening" and then tells you why it's not. We live in an age where pizza gets to your house before the police. If you don't like the way I drive, stay off the sidewalk. Sarcasm is one more service we offer. Hate is just a special kind of love we give to people who suck. I used to have super powers, but then my therapist took them away. They say the truth will set you free. Then why is it every time I tell the truth, I get sent to my room? Some people are like slinkies. They seem to have no purpose, but they still bring you a smile when you push them down the stairs. Keep smiling; It makes people wonder what you're up to. Love your enemies. It gets them really confused. Always take the time to smell the roses... and sooner or later you'll inhale a bee. If a motorist cuts you off, just turn the other cheek...nothing gets the message across like a good mooning. If genius is 1 inspiration and 99 perspiration, I must be sharing elevators with a lot of bright people. It's always darkest before dawn... So if you're gonna steal the neighbors newspaper, that's the time to do it. It takes fewer muscles to smile than to frown... and fewer still to ignore someone completely. Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked up into jet engines. I believe no problem is so large or so difficult that it can't be blamed on someone else. If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you. My father always said laughter is the best medicine, which I guess is why several of us ended up dying of tuberculosis. It takes a big man to cry... But it takes a bigger man to laugh at that man. When I'm feeling down I like to whistle... It makes my neighbor's dog run to the end of his chain and gag himself. Doors are on a house so you don't have to go through the windows. If you can't get the skeletons out of your closet, you'd better teach them to dance. Stupid is just a 5 letter word. Don't ask me to think inside my head, because I lost my inside voice. No one ever says "it's only a game" if their team is winning. Nostalgia isn't what it used to be. If UFO's are supposed to be so intelligent, then why have they abducted humans? Anyone who says "As easy as taking candy from a baby" has never tried it. If voting could change anything, it would be illegal. If you got a problem, cry a river, build a bridge, and get over it. I never repeat myself, so pay close attention to me the first time, cause I never repeat myself. Work is blackmail for survival. Don't look a gift horse in the mouth without first giving him a Certs. Canaries are the best, especially with ketchup on them. Slow and steady gets you trampled by the other guys. When opportunity knocks, shoot first and ask questions later. When all else fails, use duct tape. Isn't making a smoking section in a restaurant like making a peeing section in a swimming pool? Why do they sterilize the needle for lethal injection? You are now entering a school free drug zone. Thank you for pot smoking. I can please only one person per day. Today is not your day. Tomorrow, isn't looking good either. I love deadlines. I especially like the whooshing sound they make as they go flying by. Am I getting smart with you? How would you know? I'd explain it to you, but your brain would explode. Someday we'll look back on all this and plow into a parked car. There are very few personal problems that cannot be solved through a suitable application of high explosives. Tell me what you need, and I'll tell you how to get along without it. Accept that some days you're the pigeon, and some days you're the statue. Needing someone is like needing a parachute. If he isn't there the first time you need him, chances are you won't be needing him again. I don't have an attitude problem. You have a perception problem. My Reality Check bounced. On the keyboard of life, always keep one finger on the escape key. I don't suffer from stress. I'm a carrier. You're slower than a herd of turtles stampeding through peanut butter. Everybody is somebody else's weirdo. The dinosaur's extinction wasn't an accident. Barney came and they all committed suicide. Labels are for cans, and in case you haven't noticed, I'm not a can! Excuse me. Have you seen my sanity? I think I've lost it... Earth is the insane asylum for the universe. Hard work pays off in the future. Laziness pays off now. When life gives you lemons, make grape juice, then sit back and let the world wonder how you did it. I am not a humanitarian. I am a hell-raiser. Procrastinate NOW! If you can keep your head while other people are losing theirs, you probably don't fully understand the situation. Insanity is a perfectly rational adjustment to an insane world. Don't take life too seriously; no one gets out alive. I will temporarily rule the world, forever. Your ridiculous little opinion has been noted. Lottery: a tax on people who don’t understand statistics. I'd give my right arm to be ambidextrous. I'd kill for a Nobel peace prize. If a mute child swears, does his mother wash his hands with soap? If everything is coming your way, you’re in the wrong lane. If I could get a firm grip on reality, I'd choke it. If one synchronized swimmer drowns, do the rest have to drown too? If vegetarians eat vegetables, what do humanitarians eat? Some people are only alive because it is illegal to shoot them. Stop repeat offenders, don't reelect them! Straight is something crooked that was bent. Suicidal twin kills sister by mistake! Chaos, panic, and disorder. My work here is done. The problem with reality is a lack of background music. I laugh in the face of death...maybe not laugh more like a snicker...a quiet snicker, and I wouldn't do it directly in death's face so, it's more like a quiet snicker behind death's back. The more you complain, the longer God makes you live. There are two theories to arguing with women. Neither one works. The journey of a thousand miles begins with a broken fan belt and a flat tire. Warning: Dates in calendar are closer than they appear. If electricity comes from electrons, does Morality come from Morons?" Why does the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star have the same melody? ...why are you singing both? Inside me is a skinny woman crying to get out...I can usually shut the girl up with chocolate Two muffins sitting in an oven, one looks to the other and says, "Boy it's hot in here." and the other says "OH MY GAWD A TALKING MUFFIN!!" A cannibal gets passed by a marathon runner. He stops and licks his lips, "mmmm fast food." Death is hereditary. 42.7 of all statistics are made up on the spot Artificial Intelligence usually beats real stupidity. Assassins do it from behind. A flashlight is a case for holding dead batteries. A diplomat is someone who can tell you to go to hell in such a way that you will look forward to the trip. Daddy, why doesn't this magnet pick up this floppy disk? When you cry, I will cry; when you laugh, I will laugh, when you jump out a window...I will laugh I poured Spot remover on my dog. Now he's gone. IRS: We've got what it takes to take what you've got. Keep honking, I'm reloading. My hockey mom can beat up your soccer mom. Oh lord, give me patience. AND GIVE IT TO ME NOW Quickly, I must hurry, for there go my people and I am their leader. You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say will be misquoted then used against you. Join the Army, meet interesting people, and kill them. It IS as bad as you think, and they ARE out to get you. Criminal Lawyer is a redundancy. Few women admit their age. Few men act theirs. Forget world peace. Visualize using your turn signal. Don't steal, the government hates competition I am not a vegetarian because I love animals. I am a vegetarian because I hate plants. How many of you believe in telekinesis? Raise my hand. Those of you who think they know everything are very annoying to those of us who do. Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the universe. (Someone boring talking to you) "Hold that thought, I need to do something" walk over and stare at a wall "yup, a lot more interesting" It takes 82 muscles to frown, and only 5 to reach out and slap the crap out of somebody. I am a peaceful person that is filled with violent rage. Be nice to your kids... they pick your nursing home. I'd make you swear on the bible if it didn't make your skin sizzle. Guy: What did you say? Girl: Well, what did you think you hear? Guy: I'd rather not repeat it... Girl: Well then, we'll never learn what it was will we? Keep hope alive and laugh all the time. People might think your psycho after that, but who gives a flying flip? Besides, I can't please them all. The road to success is always under construction. A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing. If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends? Always remember you're unique, just like everyone else. Man invented language to satisfy his deep need to complain. The man who smiles when things go wrong has thought of someone to blame it on All generalizations are false, including this one. There is a fine line between fishing and just standing on the shore like an idiot. Hard work never killed anybody, but why take a chance? If there is a "WILL", there are 500 relatives. I love when people use the term "we're expecting" when they talk about pregnancy, it makes it sound like there could be multiple outcomes. Yeah, we're expecting a baby. But it could be an elephant. If swimming is so good for your figure, how do you explain whales? I do my best proofreading right after I hit send. Some people just need a high five... in the face... with a chair. Dear paranoid people who check behind their shower curtains for murderers, if you do find one, what's your plan? Sincerely, not very well thought out. If women ruled the world, there would be no wars... Just a bunch of jealous countries not talking to each other. If a word in the dictionary was misspelled, how would we know? You know, somebody actually complimented me on my driving today. They left a little note on the windshield; it said 'Parking Fine'. Dear math, I'm not a therapist. Solve your own problems. Dear life, when I said can my day get any worse...it was a rhetorical question not a challenge. Anything related to Halloween doesn't scare me. What scares me is when I flush someone else's toilet and the water keeps rising. Don't get mad when your neighbor has loud music on at 2 am. Call him up at 4 am and tell him how much you loved it. I discovered I scream the same way whether I'm about to be devoured by a great white shark or if a piece of seaweed touches my foot. The next time someone says "Paper beats Rock" I will throw a rock at their face while they hold up a sheet of paper. "Would you like a table?” "No I came to the restaurant to eat on the ground, carpet for five please". When somebody tells you nothing is impossible, ask him to dribble a football. A celebrity is a person who works hard all his life to become well known, then wears dark glasses to avoid being recognized. Never knock on death's door, ring the bell and run away, death really hates that. I am not retreating; I am advancing in a different direction! Boys are like Slinkys, pointless but fun to watch fall down the stairs. I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather... Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car. I have six locks on my door all in a row. When I go out, I lock every other one. I figure no matter how long somebody stands there picking the locks, they are always locking three. Parents spend the first half of our lives teaching us to walk and talk but they spend the other half telling us to sit down and shut up! I love how, in scary movies, the person yells out, "Hello?" As if the bad guy is gonna be like, "Yeah, I’m in the kitchen! Want a sandwich?" I don’t understand banks. Why do they attach chains to their pens? If I’m trusting you with my money, you should trust me with your pens. When someone tells you nothing is impossible, tell them to go slam a revolving door. I hate weddings. Old people would poke me saying "You're next". They stopped when I started going up to them at funerals and poking them, saying, "You're next". Crazy and loving it. I define any normal logic and really dont give a care. I swear, if there's a prize for rotten judgement, might as well be ruler of that. . . . . A positive attitude may not solve all your problems but it would annoy enough people to make worth the while. My life is always have to be full of something Crazy is what crazy can do. If you ever stumble, make it look like its part of a dance Forgive and forget, but keep a list of names. They said they didn't like my writing... It’s strange, really…when you scream in a library, everyone gives you these weird looks. But when you scream on an airplane everyone joins in! I didn't slap you. I high-fived your face. Sometimes I pretend to be normal, but it gets boring, so I go back to being ME! C is for cookie, and cookie is for me! You teach me the rules and I’ll teach you to break them. 10 years ago, we had Steve Jobs, Bob Hope and Johnny Cash. Now we have no jobs, no hope and no cash. Smile; it’s worth everything, but costs nothing. It is scientifically proven that you can die of having too many birthdays. Heaven kicked me out but hell is afraid I’ll take over. If it tastes good, it must be good for you. Where is the flaw in this logic? I'm not as random as you think I salad. I agree with the dictionary. Girls before guys, partying before studying, and friends before love. Don't follow in my footsteps... I run into walls. GOD created the world; everything else is made in China. Once you go fangirl you can never go back. Calling me FAKE won't make you REAL, Here's 100 (More like 99) random questions: 1) Are you in a relationship with somebody? Nope. 2) Do you hate more than 3 people? ...Well, yeah. 3) How many houses have you lived in? I'm guessing you mean houses my family has owned. I've never moved so one. But if I count going into another person's while still being alive then the total is really high... 4) Favorite candy bar? Chewy Runts or Skittles. 6) Have you ever tripped someone? Probably. 7) Least favorite school subject? Math. Hate it so much, I was fine until Algebra came along then everything went down hill. *8 is missing* Pasta! 9) Do you own a Brittany Spears CD? *gives death glare* Why would I? 10) Have you ever thrown up in public? Yep. 11) Name one thing that is always on your mind. Story ideas, possible plots for future stories and one's I'm currently working on, and music. 12) Favorite genre of music? Foreign, Country, some Pop, Celtic. 13) What is your zodiac sign? Libra. 14) What time were you born? 7:47 AM. 15) Do you like beer? It's illegal to drink under 21. That's not a no. Shut up. 16) Ever made a prank phone call? No. 17) What is the most embarrassing CD you own? I don't have any embarrassing ones. 18) Are you sarcastic? Extremely. 19) What are your favorite colors? Blue, green, silver. 20) How many watches do you own? One. 21) Summer or winter? Winter. 23) Favorite color to wear? Blue. 24) Pepsi or Sprite? I don't really care... Pepsi I guess. 25) What color is your cell phone? I don't have a cell phone. You're homeschooled aren't you? Shut up! 26) Where is your second home? My imagination and the library! 27) Have you ever slapped someone? Not seriously but I do Gibbs slap people. 28) Have you ever had a cavity? Once. 29) How many lamps are in your bedroom? Two. One on my desk and one next to my bed. 30) How many video games do you own? Um... like 20 DS games for a DS that doesn't work. 31) What was your first pet? My first pet was a black Labrador dog named Sara Jane. The first pet I bought myself is a Border Collie Australian Sheppard cross named Jessie. 32) Ever had braces? Still have them. 33) Do looks matter? To some people. 34) Do you use chapstick? Yeah. 35) Name 3 teachers from your High School. Nyet, I don't wanna. 36) American Eagle or Abercrombie? Neither. 37) Are you too forgiving? I'm a bit of a wild card. I do forgive but I've also been known to hold grudges. So no, not too forgiving. 38) How many children do you want? I don't know. Why do you care? 39) Do you own something from Hot Topic? I don't know. 40) Favorite breakfast meal? Something eatable that doesn't fight back. 41) Do you own a gun? Nah, but I own a knife. 42) Ever thought you were in love? I was in crush, not love but sometimes it's hard to tell the difference. 43) When was the last time you cried? I forget. 44) What did you do 3 nights ago? I stayed up late working on my fanfiction. 45) Olive Garden? La Panera? Italian food! YES! 46) Have you ever called your teacher mommy? So many times! My main teacher is my mother so it's all cool. 47) Have you ever been in a castle? I don't think so. 48) Nicknames? Twila, Snow, Snowflake, Sis, Rose, Rosie, and Alex (long story involving girls choosing guy names for themselves.) 49) Do you know anyone named Bertha? No. 50) Ever been to Kentucky? No. 51) Do you own something from Banana Republic? No. 52) Are you thinking about somebody right now? No. 53) Have you ever called someone Boo? No. 55) Do you own a diamond ring? No. 56) Are you happy with your life right now? Yeah. 57) Do you dye your hair? No. 58) Does anyone like you? Not that I know of. 59) What year were you born? '97... 60) What were you doing in May of 1994? Galavanting through heaven with a frost dragon and my best friend BrightThanLight. 61) Do you own a Backstreet Boys CD? No way! 62) McDonalds or Wendy's? Wendy's. I love their frosties. 63) Do you like yourself? I'm not in love with myself but I don't hate myself either. 64) Are you closer to your mother or father? I can bare my soul to my mom but I joke with my dad. 65) Favorite physical feature of the preferred sex? Um... eyes? 66) Are you afraid of the dark? No way. 67) Have you ever eaten paste? No...? 68) Do you own a webcam? My laptop has one built in. *pokes webcam* 69) Have you ever stripped? 0.0 No one needs that kind of info! 70) Ever broke a bone? I fractured my arm once when I flew off a galloping horse. 72) Do you chat on AIM often? What is AIM? 73) Pringles or Lays? Pringles. 74) Have you ever broken someone's heart? I don't believe so. 75) Rugrats or Doug? They're both stupid. 76) Full House or The Brady Bunch? Neither. 77) Did you like your high school guidance counselor? I don't have one. 78) Has anyone ever called you fat? No. 79) Do you have a birth mark? Yeah but I can't figure out what it looks like... 80) Do you own a car? No. 81) Can you cook? Yeah. But I hate it when people comment on my cooking. 82) 3 things that annoy you: 1) My brain (when it won't shut up it gets really annoying) 2) People (but they amuse me too) 3) My laptop 83) Do you text message? I don't know how to text... 84) Money or love? Love. 85) Do you have any scars? A surprising amount. They all tell a story and I love every single one of them. 86) What do you want more than anything right now? To rule the world! Okay I'm kidding. I want to be a published author. 87) Do you enjoy scary movies? I guess. 88) Relationships or one night stands? Relationships. 89) Big Red or Juicy Fruit? Juicy Fruit...? 90) Do you enjoy greasy food? Sometimes. 91) Have you seen all the Rocky movies? Nope. 92) Do you own a box of crayons? Somewhere... in the black hole... *glances around room* 94) Who was the last person that said they loved you? If we're talking love love then no one. If we're not then my family. 95) Who was the last person that made you mad? ...I dunno. I don't get mad easily. 96) Who was the last person that made you cry? I don't cry. 97) Who was the last person that made you laugh? I laugh a lot so I don't remember. Probably myself. 98) Who was the last person that you fell for? If I told you I'd have to kill you. 99) Who was the last person that instant messaged you? One of my friends. 100) Who was the last person that called you? A human... I think. This is the stupid test! 100 stupid things that people do! Bold the ones that apply to you! 1. Forgot to put the lid on the blender, turned it on, and had everything fly out 5. Choked on your own spit while you were talking 8. Have looked for something for at least 10 min then realized it was in your hand 18. Have had your drink come out your nose because you were laughing so hard 20. Have skinned your toe because you were playing soccer or kickball with flip flops on or you were barefoot 29. Tripped on a crack in the sidewalk 30. Said o'clock after saying how many min after the hour, example: 5:30 o'clock, or 6:15 o'clock 55. Told someone you were the wrong age because you seriously forgot how old you were 56. Looked into an overhead light purposefully while it was on 66. Did more work than you had to on an assignment because you didn't read the directions 67. Corrected someone's grammar/pronunciation then figured out that you were the one that was wrong 68. Put something in a special place so that you would remember where it was, then forgot where you put it 73. Ran into a door jam 84. Made up a code name for someone so that you could talk about them to someone else and no one else would know who you were talking about 93. Have wrapped someone in a roll of toilet paper 98. When lying in bed you look for pictures in the texture of the ceiling. 99. Have used your calculator as a form of communication in class A B C D E G H I K L M N O P S T V-Z Dear bullies, See that boy doing his homework in homeroom? Last night he Talked His friend out of suicide. See that girl you just called fat? She is starving herself. See that old man you made fun of cause of the ugly scars? He fought for our country. See that young boy you must made fun of for always being sick? He has to walk home in the snow cause his family is too poor. Re-Post this if u r against bullying. I bet 95% of u won't. Your life would probably not be as harsh as theirs I have "I" I have "L" but I Don't Have "U" Boy:If you feel STRESSED, give yourself a break, eat some cake, ice cream, chocolate or some sweets. I've been suspended from school for another three days. When my biology teacher asked me what my favourite element was, karate chopping her and saying "Element of Suprise" was wrong. If someone says your "ugly", say "well excuse me, but I'm not a mirror" Three criminals robbed a grocery store and were looking for a place to hide. they soon found a farm and went in to hide. The first criminal hid in a horse shed,the second in a pig pen and in the third in a potato sack. 20 mins later a policeman went into the farm. Roses are red, If ya can't beat 'em, join 'em. Girls You know you live in 2010 when... 1.) You accidentally enter your password on a microwave. 2.) You haven't played solitare with real cards for years 3.) The reason for not staying in touch with your friends is they dont have a screenname or facebook 4.) You'd rather look all over the house for the remote instead of just pushing the buttons on the TV 6.) Your boss doesn't even have the ability to do your job. 7.) As you read this list you keep nodding and smiling. 8.) As you read this list you think about sending it to all your friends. 9.) And you were too busy to notice number 5. 10.) You scrolled back up to see if there was a number 5. 11.) Now you are laughing at yourself stupidly. 12.) Put this in your profile if you fell for that, and you know you did Your One and Only Wish Do it one by one, don't look ahead! 1. Write the name of a person of the opposite sex. Feliciano Vargas 2. Which is your favorite color out of red, black, blue, green, and yellow? Blue 3. Your first initial? K 4. Your month of birth? October 5. Which color do you like more, black or white? White 6. Name of a person of the same sex as yours. Caylie 7. Your favorite number? Seven 8. Do you like California or Florida more? California 9. Do you like the lake or ocean more? Ocean 10. Write down a wish (a realistic one.) To become a published author Are you done? If so, scroll down (Don't cheat!) The Answers 1. You are completely in love with this person. 2. If you choose: 3. If you're initial is: 4. If You were born in: 5. If you choose... 6. This person is your best friend. 7. This is how many close friends you have in a lifetime. 8. If you choose... 9. If you choose... 10. This wish will come true only if you Re-post this bulletin in one hour and it will come true before your next birthday! Her name was Aurora She was only five This is what happened Her dad was a drunk Her only friend She always talks to it Until her parents A bruise on her leg But she grabs her bear She sits in the corner Such a bad life Then one night Then her mom suddenly She thrusted the blade The mom walked out Police showed up One officer slowly It must have been bad If child abuse makes you sick and you think it's horrible prove it. Re-post this for proof. Female come backs Man: Where have you been all my life? Man: Haven't I seen you someplace before? Man: Is this seat empty? Man: Your place or mine? Man: So, what do you do for a living? Man: How do you like your eggs in the morning? Man: Your body is like a temple. Man: I would go to the end of the world for you. Man: If I could see you naked, I'd die happy. Man: If I could rearrange the alphabet I'd put u and i together Man: Your eyes they're amazing. Man: "I know how to please a woman." Man: "I want to give myself to you." Man: "I'd go through anything for you." Man: "So, wanna go back to my place ?" Man: "I'd like to call you. What's your number?" Man: "But I don't know your name." Man: "Hey, baby, what's your sign?" Man: "Hey, come on, we're both here at this bar for the same reason" Man: "Haven't we met before?" Guy: It's a good thing I have a library card because I'm checking you out If you repost this you will get a phone call 37 minutes after you repost this... GIRLS REPOST THIS AS "female comebacks" Top 75 Most Annoying Things To Do In An Elevator When there's only one other person in the elevator, tap them on the shoulder and then pretend it wasn't you. Push the buttons and pretend they give you a shock. Smile, and go back for more. Ask if you can push the button for other people, but push the wrong ones. Call the Psychic Hotline from your cell phone and ask if they know what floor your on. Hold the doors open and say your waiting for a friend. After a while, let the doors close, and say, "Hi Greg. How's your day been?" Drop a pen and wait until someone goes to pick it up, then scream, "That's mine!" Bring a camera and take pictures of everyone in the elevator. Move your desk into the elevator and whenever anyone gets on, ask if they have an appointment. Lay down the twister mat and ask people if they would like to play. Leave a box in the corner, and when someone gets on, ask them if they can hear ticking. Pretend you are a flight attendant and review emergency procedures and exits with the passengers. Ask, "Did you feel that?" Stand really close to someone, sniffing them occasionally. When the doors close, announce to the others, "It's okay, don't panic, they open again!" Swat at flies that don't exist. Tell people that you can see their aura. Call out, "Group Hug!"and then enforce it. Grimace painfully while smacking your forehead and muttering, "Shut up, all of you, just shut up!" Crack open your briefcase or purse, and while peering inside, ask, "Got enough air in there?" Stand silently and motionless in the corner, facing the wall, without getting off. Stare at another passenger for a while, then announce in horror, "Your one of THEM!" and back away slowly. Wear a puppet on your hand and use it to talk to the other passengers. Listen to the elevator walls with your stethoscope. Make explosion noises when anyone presses a button. Stare, grinning at another passenger for a while, then announce, "I have new socks on". Draw a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other passengers, "This is MY personal space!" Put police tape in front of the door before entering. Fart loudly when there are only two of you in the elevator. Argue vehemently that it wasn't you. Hold an auction. Do the "potty dance" all the way to the elevator door. Upon arrival, sigh and look greatly relieved. Ask every passenger coming if you can borrow a tampon. Especially effective if victim is male. Even more effective if you yourself are male. Throw a rave. Place potted plants and water fountains at strategic locations in the lift. When people ask what you are doing, tell them you "won't ride an elevator that's not fung shwei." Greet everyone getting on with a warm handshake and ask them to call you "Admiral". Hum the first six notes of the "It's a small world" over and over again. When you brush past someone, whisper "Was it good for you too?" Lean over to another rider and whisper 'Noogie patrol coming!'" Have a heated debate with yourself. Bring a melon onto the elevator. Try to sell it to the other passengers. Drum on every available surface. Write a big X on the elevator floor, and hand out "pirate" maps to everyone as they enter. Give psychotherapy to the other passengers. Greet everyone coming on as if they were your best friend. Use the same name for all of them. Say "ring ring," then pull a banana out of your pocket and start talking into it. Propose to the other passengers. Challenge people to duels. Sell girl scout cookies. Bring a large pile of ice. Build an igloo on the floor. Come on looking really scared, and say to another passenger..."I'm kinda nervous...this is my first time flying..." Any time someone enters the doors, recoil in horror. Stick your tongue out. Act like it's a cigarette, and ask someone for a lighter. Pitch a tent on the floor, and "camp out" for the weekend. Play "I've got your nose" with the other passengers. Shout "Food fight!" Every time someone else talks, angrily shout: "Some people are trying to sleep here!" When arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to pull the doors open, then act embarrassed when they open by themselves. Lick one of the buttons. Tell the other passengers you're sick and tired of people stealing your food the second you turn your back. Elevators were practically MADE for river dnce! Bring a snowboard onto the elevator. Put it on. Every time the lift goes up or down, shout "WOO-YEAH! This is what I call sick air!" Make sushi. Press your nose against the other passengers, and say "You know, this is what the Eskimos used to do before having sex." Shave. Every time the elevator goes down, loudly scream "OH MY GOD!! We're all gonna die! This is it! This is it! It's over! IT'S OVER!!" Look relieved when it stops moving. When you begin to drop again, repeat. Ask the other passengers if they want to see your glass clown collection. Practice your kung fu. Make race car noises when people get on and off. Ask everyone on the elevator: "Are you my mother?" Fly a model airplane. Do yoga. Play the accordion Enter the elevator with nothing on your head. Individually ask everyone if they like your hat. Bring a rocking chair. Sit and knit. Recite gangsta rap lyrics in monotone. Enter with a shovel, and attempt to "dig for treasure." Read "Green Eggs and Ham" at the top of your lungs. Sound out every word. Put this in your profile People are like slinkies; basically useless, but ever so amusing to watch fall down the stairs. An apple a day keeps the doctor away, if well aimed. If at first you don't succeed, skydiving isn't for you. What happens if you get scared half to death... twice? Never do anything that you wouldn't want to explain to the paramedics. I run with scissors, it makes me feel dangerous. I had amnesia once--or twice. You know what? I don't really even remember. Life isn't passing me by, it's trying to run me over. Don’t mess with me. I've got a stick. If two wrongs don't make a right, try three. Of course I'm out of my mind! It's dark and scary in there! I'm not afraid of death! What's it going to do? Kill me? I dream of a better world where chickens can cross the road without having their motives questioned. I used up all my sick days...so I called in dead. Stressed is Desserts backwards :) Of all the things I’ve lost, I miss my mind the most. You're laughing now because you're older than me by mere months, but when you 30 and I'm still 29, who will be laughing then? There's a light at the end of every tunnel...lets just hope it's not a train. Ever stop to think, and forget to start again? I am in shape...round is a shape. You cry, I cry, you laugh, I laugh, you fall off a cliff, and I laugh even harder. Boys are like trees – they take fifty years to grow up. Flying is not inherently dangerous- crashing is. Forecast for tonight: darkness. Tragedy is when I cut my finger. Comedy is when you fall through a sewer hole and die. Love your enemies. It gets them really confused. If aliens are looking for intelligent life, why the heck are you scared?! I called your boyfriend gay and he hit me with his purse. Some say the glass is half full, others the glass is half empty, all I want to know is who's drank my water! AWESOME LINES FROM PJO AND HoO: “Yeah, well. I don’t try to be awesome. It just comes natural.” “Deadlines just aren't real to me until I'm staring one in the face.” How did you die?" -Percy and Charon, The Lightning Thief “My dear young cousin, if there's one thing I've learned over the eons, it's that you can't give up on your family, no matter how tempting they make it.” “God alert!" Blackjack yelled. "It's the wine dude! “Rachel: They asked me a lot of questions about you. I played dumb. “But remember, boy, that a kind act can sometimes be as powerful as a sword.” “Now, come over here so I can pat you down." “Remind me again-why do you hate me so much?" I don't hate you." Could've fooled me." "Look...we're just not supposed to get along, okay? Our parents are rivals." Why?" She sighed. "How many reasons do you want? One time my mom caught Poseidon with his girlfriend in Athena's temple, which is hugely disrespectful. Another time, Athena and Poseidon competed to be the patron god for the city of Athens. Your dad created some stupid saltwater spring for his gift. My mom created the olive tree. The people saw that her gift was better, so they named the city after her." They must really like olives." Oh, forget it." Now, if she'd invented pizza-that I could understand.” "Go chase a donut!" - Percy Jackson, Sea of Monsters "I wasn't sure where the Latin came from, i think it meant 'Eat my pants!'" - Percy Jackson, The Lightning Thief "Your pretty smug Lord Ares, for a guy who runs from Cupid statues." -Percy Jackson, The Lightning Thief “It only works on wild animals.” "New lesson, class. Most monsters will vaporize when sliced with a celestial bronze sword. This change is perfectly normal, and will happen to you right now if you don't BACK OFF!" - Percy Jackson, Battle of the Labyrinth "You drool when you sleep." - Annabeth Chase, The Lightning Thief I nodded, looking at Rachel with respect. "You hit the Lord of the Titans in the eye with a blue plastic hairbrush." - Percy Jackson, The Battle of the Labyrinth "Don't feel bad, I'm usually about to die.-Percy Jackson, The Battle of the Labyrinth "Humans see what they want to see." - Chiron, The Lightning Thief Knowing too much of your future is never a good thing." - Chiron, The Last Olympian Our English teacher, Dr. Boring (I’m not kidding; that’s his real name), adjusted his glasses and frowned.Percy Jackson, The Demigod Files "Remake the world, a little at a time, each in your own corner of the world." - Someone from the Battle of the Labyrinth "Wow," Thalia muttered. "Apollo is hot." "Die human! Die silly polluting nasty person!" - Grover Underwood, The Lightning Thief "That's right, you smelly bucket of nose drool!" Percy Jackson, She's (Sally's) funny that way, celebrating special occasions with blue food. I think it's her way of saying anything is possible. Percy can pass seventh grade. Waffles can be blue. Little miracles like that.-Percy Jackson, The Lightning Thief “So Zeus sent this magical flying ram with golden wool, which picked them up in Greece and carried them all the way to Colchis in Asia Minor. Well, actually it carried Cadmus. Europa fell off and died along the way, but that's not important." "With great power, comes the great need to take a nap. Wake me up later."- Nico di Angelo, The Last Olympian "Beacause I'm your friend Seaweed Brain. Any more stupid questions?"- Annabeth Chase, The Last Olympian "Let us find the dam snack bar."-Zoe Nightshade, The Titan's Curse "Don't I get a kiss for luck? Its kind of a tradition, right?"- Percy Jackson, The Last Olympian Well...sure good to be together again. Jumping out a window five hundred feet above ground is not usually my idea of fun. Especially when I'm wearing bronze wings and flapping my arms like a duck." -Percy Jackson, The Battle of The Labyrinth "The cafe windows wrapped all the way around the observation floor, which gave us a beautiful panoramic view of the skeleton army that had come to kill us." - Percy Jackson, The Titan's Curse "Now, if you have never been hit by a flying burrito, count yourself lucky. In terms of deadly projectiles, it's right up there with grenades and cannonballs." - Percy Jackson He fished out his acorns and threw them onto the sand, then played his pipes. They rearranged themselves in a pattern that made no sense to me, but Grover looked concerned. Fortunately he’d shrunk back to normal size, so his hug was like getting hit by a tractor, not the entire farm. –Percy Jackson Apollo?” I guessed, because I figured nobody else could make a haiku that bad. “He looked… nervous. He told him monsters to spare me. He wanted to tell me something.” We only came close to dying six or seven times, which I thought was pretty good. –Percy Jackson You deal with mythological stuff for a few years, you learn that paradises are usually places where you get killed. -Percy Jackson "Yay!" he said. "Now we can eat peanut butter sandwiches and ride fish ponies! We can fight monsters and see Annabeth and make things go BOOM!" “It is a day when things…stir.” “Okay,” Annabeth said, glaring at the centaur. “Thank you, Captain Sunshine.” -Annabeth Chase to Chiron, The Lost Hero “It’ll be dangerous,” Nyssa warned him. “Hardship, monsters, terrible suffering” Even that horrible zit at the base of her nose, which she’d had for so many days she’d started to call it Bob, had disappeared. –Piper McLean, The Lost Hero "if you don't like it, you can kiss my quiver" Michael Yew, The Lost Hero 1. Do not introduce self as a role-playing character in public. 2. Do not talk to fictional characters in public. 3. Do not answer fictional characters in public. 4. Do not talk to inanimate objects in public. 5. Do not go out in public. 6. Disregard above note. Perform numbers 1 to 4. 7. Note expressions. 8. Don't die alone. Take many people with you. 9. Floor is slippery when wet. 10. Lake is slippery when dry. 11. Only talk to strangers you know. 12. Strangers you don't know are spies. Kill them all. 13. For legal purposes, be sure to delete above note. 14. Tell people about the spies that are trying to kill you. 15. Kill them for security purposes. 16. Crying does not solve anything. Try violent mood swings. 17. Make a scene whenever humanly possible. 18. The men in white coats are not your friends. 19. Ask them for a room with lots of sharp, pointy objects. 20. When that doesn't work, ask for a designer jacket. 21. Chicken soup, although good for colds, is not the best cure for drowning. 22. Flammable and inflammable mean the same thing. 23. Unlike fine wine, milk does not get better with age. 24. Always remember, um... Um... Damn. 25. Train an army of flying monkeys. 26. Goldfish don't like milk. 27. Do not maim people. If you already have, kill them to avoid lawsuits. 28. Find out who invented the word "pianist." 29. People are staring at you. 30. So act insane. 31. People are weird, but not as weird as me. 32. Do not taunt animals at zoo. They have feelings... and teeth. 33. Little people are aggressive. Stay away from little people. 34. Going through other people's stuff is a bonding experience. Do this as much as possible. 35. You'll sometimes notice shadows late at night. Don't worry. It's only me... bonding. 36. Never pet a burning dog. 37. Never make eye contact with a naked man - Especially not if you are wearing a parka. 38. Naked men dig parkas. 39. Beware the naked man who offers you his parka. 40. You know what would look good on you? 41. Immolated cockroaches. 42. Don't worry. It's only a harmless pimento bug. 43. The size of Danny DeVito. 44. Making an amusing facial expression. Like this. *-* 45. Numbers are evil. Count in clovers. 46. Stalking is fun. Do it more. 47. Make a large sign saying "Look at me, I'm a gum nut tree!" 48. No matter what anyone says, there is a way to get to your fantasy world. 49. That way is rum. 50. Constipated people don't give a sh!t. 51. You cannot kill the snow. 52. The snow can kill you. 53. Grass can also kill you. 54. The leprechaun on the cereal box said I can't get his lucky charms... 55. Catch and castrate leprechaun. 56. HE is real - no matter what the men in white coats say. 57. Staple paper in the middle of the page. 58. In case of blank looks, laugh maniacally. 59. You are not haxxor l337 or an uberhacker or anything like that. 60. Pretend to be so around teh n00bs. 61. Do not go out with voice #7. He is a sadistic, soul-sucking demon. 62. Disregard last note. Go out with demon. Who needs a soul anyway? 63. Ask Senor Diablo for a bigger pitchfork. 64. Remember to kill HIM... 65. Tell the small children in Toys 'R' Us that the dolls have an insatiable thirst for blood. 66. Note reactions. Avoid parents. 67. The blood of infants gives unholy superpowers according to Jhonen C. Vasquez. Test theory. 68. Scream - The doctors don't like it. They'll give you a shot of something nice. 69. Hide the bodies. Otherwise, people ask embarrassing questions. 70. Eat the evidence. 71. But not if it's broken glass. 72. When in the presence of someone much wiser than you, point in a random direction and yell, "Look, a distraction!" Then run. 73. Do not tell children that Santa is fat because he eats kids. 74. Disregard last note. 75. Note reactions. 76. On average, 100 people choke to death on ball point pens every year. 77. Stock up on ball point pens. 78. Learn to fly. Tell no one. 79. The secret to flying is throwing yourself at the ground and missing. 80. Do not stick fingers into blender. 81. Blender... bad... ouch… 82. Blood loss is bad. 83. Find way to re-attach fingers. 84. Scream as much as humanly possible at 2AM. 85. Answer every question with a question. 86. Ask people what gender they are. 87. Note reactions. 88. Refer to people as "mortal". 89. The Seagull from Hell is out to get me. 90. Kill all enemies in most disturbing way possible. 91. Start by drowning them in fire ants. 92. Find the creators of pop-up messages. 93. Kill them. 94. Brutally. 95. Teachers don't like finding notes on world domination. 96. Dunk head in boiling water. 97. Disregard last note. It was written by Voice #7. 98. Gullible IS written on the ceiling! 99. Investigate this whole "critical mass" thing when the klaxon dies down... 100. Find out who invented "Barny". 101. Kill them. girl dies in movie* HAHA THAT'S WHAT YOU GET!!! Here are some things that make you laugh 1. Don't make me get out my flying monkeys 2. Chaos, Panic & Disorder, my work here is done 3. Don't meddle in affairs of dragons because in their world you are crunchy and go good with ketchup 4. Growing old is mandatory but growing up is optional 5. I do what ever my rice crispies tell me 6. You're just jelous because the voices are talking to me 7. Obedient women are never remembered in history 8. I believe in dragons, good men and other fantasy creatures 9. My mind wandered and never came back 10. Don't steal the government hate competition 11. DO NOT start with me you will NOT win 12. God bless freaks 13. I know there is a hell... I work in rentail 14. SARCASM a service I offer 15. People have the right to be stupid. Some people abuse that privilege 16. People say nothing is impossible, but I do nothing every day 17. People that don't know me think I'm shy. 18. Neext time you think you're perfect, try walking on water 19. A wise man once said, "I don't know, go ask a woman." 20. I talk to myself because I like dealing with a better class of people 21. Never try to drown your troubles... Especially if he can swim 22. I don't need your attitude, I have one of my own 23. I can't make you want me, 24. It's not that I'm antisocial. I just don't like you. 25. Woman's Prayer: 26. Smile, and the world will smile with you. Laugh and they'll all think your on drugs. 27. Good Girls are only Bad girls who did not get caught!! 28. God made rivers, God made lakes, God made you ... well we all make mistakes 29. I think... therefore I'm single 30. If looks could kill, You would be a weapon of mass destruction 31. If i could be any Barbie, i would be Divorce Barbie. She comes with, Ken's House, Ken's Car and Ken's Boat 32. To catch me, you gotta be fast. To find me, you gotta be smart. To be me?? Crap! You gotta be kidding!! 33. The doctor tells me I'm crazy, but the voices tell me I'm not. I just don't know which one to believe 34. I'm not being rude. You're just insignificant. 35. Have you ever noticed that if you rearranged the letters in Mother-In-Law, they come out to Woman Hitler 36. I'm out of my mind right now, but you may leave a message 37. I'm not random, I just have many thoughts. Jealous, aren't you? 38. A stranger stabs you in the front; a friend stabs you in the back; a boyfriend stabs you in the heart, but best friends only poke each other with straws. 39. The trouble with real life is that there is no danger music 40. If you can't take the heat, don't tickle the dragon 41. Your friendship means so much to me that... When you cry... 42. I am a bomb technician. If you see me running, try to keep up 25 REASONS I OWE MY MOTHER 1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE. "If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning." 2. My mother taught me RELIGION. "You better pray that will come out of the carpet." 3 . My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL. "If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week!" 4. My mother taught me LOGIC. "Because I said so, that's why." 5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC. "If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the store with me." 6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT. "Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident." 7. My mother taught t me IRONY. "Keep crying, and I'll give you something to cry about." 8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS. "Shut your mouth and eat your supper." 9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM. "Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck!" 10. My mother taught me about STAMINA. "You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone." 11. My mother taught me about WEATHER. "This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it." 12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY. "If I told you once, I've told you a million times. Don't exaggerate!" 13. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE. "I brought you into this world, and I can take you out." 14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION. "Stop acting like your father!" 15. My mother taught me about ENVY. "There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do." 16. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION . "Just wait until we get home." 17. My mother taught me about RECEIVING. "You are going to get it when you get home!" 18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE. "If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to freeze that way." 19. My mother taught me ESP. "Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you are cold?" 20. My mother taught me HUMOR. "When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don 't come running to me." 21. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT. "If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up." 22. My mother taught me GENETICS. "You're just like your father." 23. My mother taught me about my ROOTS. "Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?" 24. My mother taught me WISDOM. "When you get to be my age, you'll understand." 25. And my favorite: My mother taught me about JUSTICE. "One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you!" Sweat drops* Not really, I just really liked that... I love you Mom! You know you're obsessed with Hetalia when… [x] When you wonder why the polar bear at the zoo isn't talking to you [x] When your teacher questions you when you constantly laugh during History class [x] When you scream "Happy Birthday Alfred" and/or "Take that Arthur" on the Fourth of July in a large crowd of people and are proud when they give you the WTF look [x] When you know what Sealand is and people find you weird for telling them he's a little kid in a blue sailor suit that was for sale on eBay [x] When you laugh if a country's "vital regions" are discussed in the news/media [x] When you question why only a few countries use Japanese as the foremost language [x] When in a conversation about APH, you specifically use both country and human names to confuse the people around you [x] (the obvious) When you ask, no, COMMAND people to become one with mother Russia and laugh hysterically when they look confused, telling them "everyone eventually becomes one with Russia" before walking away [ ] When you walk into a Hello Kitty store and ask where the Shinatty-Chan merchandise is [ ] When you take time out of your day to look up country relationships on Wikipedia [x] When you begin to notice all the jokes about China [ ] When you try to make your own "idiot hair" and use two bottles of hair gel in the process [x] When the Great Depression all of a sudden seem hilarious. "Your backside is MINE, America!" [ ] When you correct someone talking about a new discovery of some kind, telling them "Korea already invented that" [x] When you have to remind people that Hong Kong is NOT the capital of China [x] When you explain that when the aliens attack, the first to go will be the British (Doctor Who anyone?) [x] When you're grade in Geography suddenly shoots up [x] When others ask you what you mean by "England is so cute when he's Tsundere" [ ] When you correct uour history teacher, telling them that the pact of steal between Germany and Italy was actually a pinky swear [ ] When seeing the new Harry Potter movie the second time, the only thing you can think of is the infamous spoiler written all over England's torso [x] When the contagious verbal tics of the show become a part of your normal day conversations [x] When you have full-out and vicious debates on what side (the Axis or Allies) would win in a fist fight (*cough*Axis*cough*) [x] When you imagine, when in a state of insane exhilaration or any kind of insanity emotion, you have the same menacing purple aura that often haunts Russia when he's "happy" [x] When you realize you've memorized every single version of MaruKaite Chikyuu and sing them regularly [x] When you find yourself scanning through your history textbook to find a good fanfiction topic [ ] When you feel yourself tearing-up while discussing the American Revolution [x] When you start learning Japanese just to read the Hetalia website [x] When you expect the Polish exchange student to be a cross-dressing valley girl [x] When you download your favorite episodes and watch them compulsively [x] When you randomly scream "PASTA" and think everyone around you is weird for not getting the joke [x] When a tomato crate seems like the best hiding place during a war (Who’s going to shoot at a tomato crate anyway?) [x] When you know the songs "Fat na kare", "Oyayubi no Tsukaikata", "Makka na Ito", "Yokan", "Gibusu", "Lion", "Tetsukazu No Sekai" and "Utsukushii Namae", have downloaded them onto your itunes and listen to them daily [x] When "True Italian Spirit" is only another way to say "We Surrender" [x] When the song "Santa Clause is coming to Town" seems like an odd rip-off of something that was written for Russia (There actually is a parody song for Russia) [ ] When you try to convince your history teacher to play Chibitalia episodes when learning about the Austrian Wars [x] When, upon looking at your YouTube favorites, you find that APH videos have filled up at least two pages of space [x] When you begin to read all about your favorite country obsessively to learn more about them [x] When you start noticing how much you absolutely adore sunflowers [x] When you realize there's always someone underneath the cute mascot uniforms [ ] When you discover the joys of the Sexy Waiter outfit [ ] When you explain to others that condoms are the best weapons in psychological warfare [x] When others find you odd for talking to the fairies, flying rabbits and unicorns even if they're the odd ones out for not being able to see them in the first place [x] When you decided to construct your own APH OC and proudly proclaim to the world that you were the one who created Portugal [ ] When you want your own pink kitty backpack [ ] When "Flower-Egg" seems like the best name for your new puppy [ ] When England wearing America's jacket is probably one of the best things that's ever happened to you [x] When, upon being scolded by a teacher when caught watching/reading APH in class, you explain that you're merely studying for you History exam [x] When you watch movies/plays/musicals/etc., place APH characters in the roles and plan you're parody fanfiction of it [x] When you try and memorize the "Yakko's World" song just because you can imagine the countries while singing it [x] When you don't feel like a nerd for knowing so much about history/geography [ ] When you find yourself attracted to bushy eyebrows, even thinking them sexy [x] When, if something big happens in the world, you imagine the countries' reactions [x] When, upon acting/cosplaying as Italy, you close your eyes and keep them closed to see if you can really function that way, only to realize that, no, you cannot [x] When you try to plant random bits of Hetalia into your schoolwork, and marvel at the fact that you're the only one that knows what you're talking about [x] When you wish your grandfather could be as awesome as Rome [ ] When the sound of bouncing beach balls (Ukraine's boobs) is now disturbing to you [x] When you use your favorite / cosplayed country's name in place of your own [ ] When watching South Park, you find great embarrassment in the fact that you're composing your own episode in which the APH characters are present [ ] When you explain to your Geography teacher that Corsica isn't an island; it's Italy's nipple. [x] When you find yourself doodling your history notes into a Hetalia-like situation, much to your teacher's dismay (ex: Spanish-American war for a Hetalia fan = Cuba getting pissed at Antonio and Alfred beating Antonio up before giving him a few bucks and skipping away). [x] When you confuse the people around you by outwardly expression your frustration that you can't choose between countries to cosplay as [x] When you purchase a dish at a restaurant specifically for the name (Like RomanoChicken) [x] When you realize you're not sure how to react to the Hetalia: Paint it White! movie [x] When you begin to understand that you're ticking off those around you who don't know of Hetalia/those who don't like Hetalia [x] When "Aiyah, 4000 Years" made you weep like a little girl [x] When you find yourself following the World Cup just to root for your favorite country [x] When the Yugioh the Abridged "America" references all have a double meaning to you [x] When it aggravates you that people refer to male countries as "she" or "her" [ ] When You find the song "Canada's Really Big" or any other references to country's sizes amusingly inappropriate [ ] When Shinatty-chan becomes a frequent doodle on your notebook and you have to explain that it is not hello kitty, but a fat, old guy in a hello kitty imitation outfit [x] When you spout random facts about various countries and revel in the fact that no one else knows about them [x] When you find yourself suddenly a lot more aware of the current world situations because people did fanfictions and fan art about them [x] When you start laughing at a world map because it's really more than just a placement of countries to you [x] When you have a French exchange student, and you expect them to be just like France... and are fascinated that, yes they are [ ] You spend all day scouring the internet for country relations in a vain attempt to justify your crack pairings [x] When you suddenly take great pleasure in learning about your lineage and relating it to Hetalia characters (I always took pride in my heritage Hetalia just helped but faces to names.) [x] When you start assigning your best friends countries and when you get together you call it a "World Conference" (I haven’t yet call them that yet but so far we have Italy (me), Norway, Germany, Russia, France, Ireland, and Mexico) [ ] When said friends start forming the pairings you support [ ] When you bribe your friend to say "Aru" at the end of every sentence [x] When you know about more countries than your geography teacher [ ] When you start squealing in geography class [x] When in history class you start making what you're learning about into a Hetalia episode in your head [x] When you obsessively search Hetalia MADs on YouTube and are confident you know most of them off by heart [x] When suddenly the image of America is no longer of Uncle Sam or Lady Liberty in your head [ ] When you see a book in the store called 'Your Erroneous Zones' and automatically touch (or want to touch) your hair [x] When Charlie the Unicorn is tainted for life, thanks to England [x] When you start chanting "kolkolkol" when someone annoys/angers you. [ ] When you're shocked that all the Ukrainian girls you see haven't fallen over yet due to figure disproportions. [x] When you feel the need to violently mash your potatoes with a fork no matter what state they may be in. [x] When you keep on denying that "It wasn't the Axis' fault! It was their bosses!" or "They were under their dark selves at those times!" (Hey, true is true.) [x] When you know you improved in drawing and writing thanks to Hetalia [x] When you keep on laughing and you relate to your dad every time he watches the boxing videos of Ricky Hatton against Manny Pacquiao and you will mutter "Iggy probably still has a grudge against Firi-tan" or "Take that Arthur!" or "LOL England got defeated by a woman!!!" [x] When you stalk Hidekaz Himaruya's blog and you are sad to know that he added new comics IN JAPANESE that most can't read [x] When you attempt to sing "Country From Where the Sun Rises; Zipangu" And FAIL miserably to the point that your dog hates you for it. AND that you had fun singing "W.D.C. World Dancing" since you were shouting random English at your computer. That and "Einsamkeit" made your heart melt when you read the English translations. [x] When you rant about "Why they didn't finish RomaHeta" and you plan on making a flash of that AFTER you get a tablet (They need to finish HetaOni too…) [x] When you realize that your notebook (that rarely has any notes) became your fanfiction notebook and is now ashamed to show it to your teacher [x] When you absentmindedly face palm every time your mom says "Your house looks like Chinese" and will try to see Yao's reaction and face to that [x] When going to the supermarket or hardware store, you look at where the product was made from and laugh (I saw something made in France and I was giggling) OR you saw a banner that says "International" and beside it were flags and you tried naming every flag. [x] When you randomly scream out "DO NOT PUT THE NAME OF [insert country/human name here] IN VAIN!!!" when a person/comedian in TV makes a random comment and says something about [insert country here] [x] When at the right moment, the song "Let's Boil Hot Water!" came on your Ipod and you start singing, adding a long "PASTAAAA" at the end only to realize that the volume was on max, you were screaming and people where looking at you. [x] When you sang "The Delicious Tomato Song" when you saw tomatoes in the grocery store [x] When you complete all Marukaite Chikyuu and you have them in your Ipod (I’ve lost count of mine.) [x] When the word "Invading" even without Vital Regions sounded dirty to you and you laugh ] When you REALLY question yourself how "Pangaea" is possible and you are trying to imagine how it works... and failing to imagine it properly without thinking of dirty thoughts [x] When you apparently stalk this list and randomly adds new stuff in it when you had moments [x] When 'Honda's Really Big Thing' becomes more humorous than it really should be... [x] When you listen to "Blame Canada" from South Park and can't help laughing and shouting "MATTHEW!!!" [ ] When someone mentions "Big Ben" you can't help but go scarlet and giggle like a school girl. [ ] When your teacher says that the alliance between Germany and Italy was "one of convenience" and you immediately reply, "IT'S TRUE LOVE AND YOU KNOW IT!" [x] When you can't say international affairs with a straight face [x] When you hear/see the name "Susan" and automatically think of Sweden. [x] When you picture Hungary and Austria's wedding when you learn about them joining countries. (My PruHun dies…) [x] When learning about Ancient Rome, Ancient Greece, or Ancient Egypt, you stop yourself from correcting the history teacher telling them, "It's Grandpa Rome, Mama Greece, and Mama Egypt!" (What about Germania?!) [x] When people ask you why America is your favorite country, you reply "Cause he's the hero! And the hero is always the best!" (Well, not my favorite but he’s up there) [x] When you see the label "Made in China" you shout "HA! Take that Korea!" [x] You think Maru Kaite Chikyuu should be the international anthem. [x] You weep tears of joy when hearing about the fall of the Berlin Wall and say "It's a family reunion!" [x] When you see someone spying on someone else, you have an urge to pull out a frying pan and say "Kami-sama, is this the right thing to do?!" [ ] When you spend half a day constructing a "You Know you're Obsessed with Hetalia when…" That girl you just called fat? She's Over Dosing on diet pills. That girl you just called ugly? She spends hours putting on makeup just so people may like her. That boy you just tripped? He gets abused enough at home. Remember the man with the ugly scars? He fought for our country. Remember that woman with the distorted face? She was in a gas explosion. People dont have to hurt. Stop the hate. Copy and past to your profile if you are against bullying. 99% percent of you won't. I did. If you believe in Jesus Christ put this on your profile. He'll see it. When you carry a Bible, the devil gets a headache. Jesus had no servants, yet they called him Master… He had no degree, yet they called him Teacher… He had no medicine, yet they called him Healer… He had no army, yet kings feared him… He won no military battles, yet he conquered the World… He committed no crime, yet they crucified Him… He was buried in a tomb, yet He lives today Feel honored to serve such a leader who loves us… If you believe in God and that Jesus Christ is His son… Then copy and paste this into your profile If you ignore him, in the Bible, Jesus says.. “If you deny me before man, I will deny you before my father in Heaven…” For me, crazy is a loose term. Let me explain. 1. Crazy is when you laugh uncontrollably at your own jokes. 2. Crazy is when you stare at a pencil and laugh when someone asks you what is so interesting about the eraser. 3. Crazy is when you have an hour-long sob fest, and then start singing and dancing when your favorite song comes on. 4. Crazy is when you do or say a completely random thing, like "Do you ever wonder where the eraser bits go?" or having a thumbwar with yourself. 5. Crazy is when you type up all your favorite sayings, print them off and tape them to your wall, just for something to do. 6. Crazy is when you laugh when nothing's funny. 7. Crazy is when you crack up if someone says "Oatmeal!". 8. Crazy is when you forget what you're saying in the middle of a sentence. 9. Crazy is when you take the time to write down stuff like this and memorize it. 10. Crazy is when your are going through this as a checklist. 11. Crazy is when you quote Charlie the Unicorn at random moments. 12. Crazy is when you're crazy. 13. Crazy is when start talking nonsense everyday during gym. 14. Crazy is when you convince your friends you're 'amazing' because you can't stop laughing even when nothing is funny. And then all of you convince the nearest adult that you're having a breakdown. 15. Crazy is when you trip up the stairs, and laugh all the way back down them. 16. Crazy is when it is last day of school you scream and run around in circles. 17. Crazy is when you get drunk on air and laugh during the saddest part of the move. 18. Crazy is when you pick up a stick and run around screaming, "I'm a pixie!". 19. Crazy is when you eat your friend's chocolate bar and tell them that the Purple Sandwich Monster did it. 20. Crazy is when you hug people who hate being hugged every two minutes. 21. Crazy is when after you watch a movie, you search it on Wikipedia. 22. Crazy is when you say "Narwhals are just Unicorns in disguise! I swear!". 23. If you have a fangirl moment when reading a book. 24. Crazy is when you do things to people just so they think you're weird. 25. Crazy is mixing all the soda's you can find. 26. Crazy is constantly drawing circles on your arm. 27. Crazy is becoming best friends with people you barely know. 28. Crazy is reading a sad book just to cry and ending up laughing like a maniac. 29. Crazy is when you have a friend who writes you a note about a crazy stalker dog instead of taking math notes. 30. Crazy is when you make a scene just to avoid doing homework. 31. Crazy is when you cheer for the killer in a horror movie. If you're crazy, copy this onto your profile and add something crazy you've done to the list! M.ental A.buse T.o H.umans If you agree with the following statement, copy and paste in your profile. Math is evil If you've ever felt like someone(thing) was watching you and then turned around to find nothing, copy and paste this into your profile. I hate pop-ups. If you hate all the ads popping up while you're trying to read some story, copy this into your profile. If you've ever bursted out laughing in a silent room over something that happened yesterday, copy and paste this into your profile. If after watching Hetalia you dream about countries (guilty) copy and paste this in your profile. If you are crazy and insane, put this in your profile. Anime is Life. Manga is life. Life is good. Parents suck for not buying you more life. If you agree, copy and paste this to your profile. If you think that those stupid kids should just give that God-forsaken Trix rabbit some Trix, copy this into your profile If you think that it would be fun to be a cartoon, copy this message into your profile. If you wish that a fictional character was real, copy and paste this to your profile. If you've ever wondered what Kisame would taste like as Sushi, copy and paste this into your profile. If you think Tobi should run for president, copy and paste this onto your profile and add you name! Aurora1495. midnightstar237!! hopeofabrightfuture (come on guys you know he'd be great, and honestly it's not like it can get any worse than the ones we've already had;) If you believe in God, copy and paste this onto your profile...do it, He's counting on you! WWJD! There's nothing wrong with arguing with yourself. It's when you argue with yourself and LOSE then it's weird. If you agree, copy this and put it in your profile. If you have ever seen a movie (or show) so many times that you can quote it word for word, and you do so at random moments, copy and paste this in you're profile. If you're one of those people who get excited when you have just two reviews, paste this into your profile. If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fanfictions, copy this into your profile If you've ever copied and pasted something into your profile, copy and paste this into your profile. If you actually take the time to read copy and pastes, copy this onto your profile. If you probably need a life but have no intentions of getting one, put it on your profile If you get way to excited for books, movies, ect. to come out, copy this into your profile If you have ever pushed on a door that said pull or vise versa copy and paste this into your profile. If you like filling your profile with 'copy this into your profile' thingies, then copy and paste this into your profile If you've ever had a mad laughing fit for no reason, copy and paste this into your profile. If you love the rain, copy and paste this into your profile. If you have your own little world, copy and paste this on your profile. If there are times when you wanna annoy people just for the heck of it, copy and paste this into your profile. If you've ever screamed at a book or the TV copy and paste this into your profile. If you've ever had a crush on a TV/anime/book/game character, copy and paste this into your profile. If it takes something truly awesome and epic for you to fangirl/fanboy over, copy and paste this into your profile. If you ever wished that your favorite actor/author somehow came across your fanfiction, copy and paste into your profile. If you have ever picked up random sounds like 'kyaaaa','teehee', 'neee', 'nyaaaa' from animes, copy and paste this into your profile. If you add the sufix 'ish' to words, cute'ish, stalker'ish etc, copy and paste this into your profile If you say 'I think' at the end of your sentences so no one can blame you when what you said turns out to not be true, copy and paste into your profile Most people would be offended if someone asked them what was wrong with their mind. Copy this into your profile if you would be one of the few people that would answer, "Where to begin?" If you ever threatened a computer or video game console, copy and paste this in your profile. If you ever read past two in the morning, copy and paste this to your profile. If u already lost ur sanity copy and paste this to ur profile... I never was sane I was walking around in a Target store, when I saw a cashier hand this little boy some money back. The boy couldn't have been more than 5 or 6 years old. The cashier said, "I'm sorry, but you don't have enough money to buy this doll." Then the little boy turned to the old woman next to him: ''Granny, are you sure I don't have enough money?'' The old lady replied: ''You know that you don't have enough money to buy this doll, my dear.'' Then she asked him to stay there for just 5 minutes while she went to look a round. She left quickly. The little boy was still holding the doll in his hand. Finally, I walked toward him and I asked him who he wished to give this doll to. "It's the doll that my sister loved most and wanted so much for Christmas. She was sure that Santa Claus would bring it to her." I replied to him that maybe Santa Claus would bring it to her afterall, and not to worry. But he replied to me sadly. "No, Santa Claus can't bring it to her where she is now. I have to give the doll to my mommy so that she can give it to my sister when she goes there." His eyes were so sad while saying this. "My sister has gone to be with God. Daddy says that Mommy is going to see God very soon too, so I thought that she could take the doll with her to give it to my sister.'' My heart nearly stopped. The little boy looked up at me and said: "I told daddy to tell mommy not to go yet. I need her to wait until I come back from the mall." Then he showed me a very nice photo of him where he was laughing. He then told me "I want mommy to take my picture with her so she won't forget me. I love my mommy and I wish she doesn't have to leave me, but daddy says that she has to go to be with my little sister." Then he looked again at the doll with sad eyes, very quietly. I quickly reached for my wallet and said to the boy. "Suppose we check again, just in case you do have enough money for the doll?'' "OK," he said, "I hope I do have enough." I added some of my money to his without him seeing and we started to count it. There was enough for the doll and even some spare money. The little boy said: "Thank you God for giving me enough money!" Then he looked at me and added, "I asked last night before I went to sleep for God to make sure I had enough money to buy this doll, so that mommy could give it to my sister. He heard me!'' "I also wanted to have enough money to buy a white rose for my mommy, but I didn't dare to ask God for too much. But He gave me enough to buy the doll and a white rose.'' "My mommy loves white roses." A few minutes later, the old lady returned and I left with my basket. I finished my shopping in a totally different state from when I started. I couldn't get the little boy out of my mind. Then I remembered a local newspaper article two days ago, which mentioned a drunk man in a truck, who hit a car occupied by a young woman and a little girl. The little girl died right away, and the mother was left in a critical state. The family had to decide whether to pull the plug on the life-sustaining machine, because the young woman would not be able to recover from the coma. Was this the family of the little boy? Two days after this encounter with the little boy, I read in the newspaper that the young woman had passed away. I couldn't stop myself as I bought a bunch of white roses and I went to the funeral home where the body of the young woman was exposed for people to see and make last wishes before her burial. She was there, in her coffin, holding a beautiful white rose in her hand with the photo of the little boy and the doll placed over her chest. I left the place, teary-eyed, feeling that my life had been changed forever.. The love that the little boy had for his mother and his sister is still, to this day, hard to imagine. And in a fraction of a second, a drunk driver had taken all this away from him. Now you have 2 choices: 1) Repost this message. 2) Ignore it as if it never touched your heart If you have an odd sort of love/hate relationship with your computer, copy and paste this into your profile If you read people's profiles looking for things to copy and paste into your profile, copy and paste this into your profile 95 percent of people are concerned with being popular. If you are part of the five percent who couldn't care less, copy this to your profile. If you are weird, insane, crazy, odd, not-normal, a freak of nature, psychotic, random, or anything similar, post this in your profile If you've ever wished you could go into a book and strangle some of the characters for being so incredibly dumb, copy and paste this into your profile. 93 percent of American teens would have a severe emotional breakdown if someone called them a freak. If you're a part of the 7 percent who would ask the person, "What was your first clue?" copy and paste this on your profile. If you've ever asked a really stupid, obvious question, copy and paste this onto your profile. If you have ever yelled at the book you were reading because the characters did something stupid post this on your profile. 97 percent of youth would go emo if Miley Cyrus was on top of a building about to jump. If your one of the 3 percent that would be screaming "JUMP, JUMP, JUMP" and pushing her off , copy and paste this onto your profile. If you have ever tripped over your own feet, copy and paste this into your profile. If you have a crush on an anime character that not many people pay attention to copy this to your profile. If you dislike those obnoxious snobby people, PLEASE copy this into your profile. If you have a true friend, copy and paste this into your profile. If you ever forgotten what you were talking about in a conversation copy and paste this into your profile. If you ran up a "down" escalater, copy and paste this into your profile. If you have the need to howl at the moon, copy and paste this into your file. FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUDGE ... copy and paste this into your file. If you are crazy and/or insane and proud of it, copy and paste this onto your profile. If you have weird friends, copy this into your profile. If YOU are weird, please copy this into your profile. If you have ever zoned out for more than five consecutive minutes, copy this into your profile. If you have ever lost your train of thought in the middle of a sentence, copy this into your profile. If you have ever been about to say something but forgot it right before you say it, copy this into your profile. If you have ever been about to say something but then someone interrupted you, and then when they let you talk you forgot what you were planning on saying, copy this into your profile. If you think that your mom sometimes wants to suck you up with the vacuum cleaner, copy and paste this into your profile. If you squeal/nyah/make any high pitched noise after seeing something really, really cute, copy and paste this into your profile. If you hear voices in your head, copy and paste this into your profile. If you are an Axis Powers Hetalia fan, copy this onto your profile! IMPORTANT- Teenage girls who are NOT in love with Edward Cullen/ Robert Patterson are fast becoming an endangered species. If you are part of this endangered species, copy and paste this in your profile. Quick, we need sponsors! :D:D:D:D:D If you want to be a writer and fanfiction is just the beginning, copy and paste this onto your profile If you've ever burst out laughing in a quiet room, add this to your profile If you haven't died yet, copy and paste this onto your profile. If your profile is long, copy and paste this on it to make it even longer! If you should be doing homework right now, copy and paste this into your profile. Yes I am a girl and I hate Justin Bieber... post this to your profile if you agree If you are obsessed with Fanfiction, put this into your profile. If you've ever wondered what you're like in a parallel universe, put this on your profile. (seriously, it COULD exist. It's scientificly confirmed!) If you are sick of people talking about Twilight, copy this into your profile. 98 percent of teenagers do or has tried smoking pot. If you're one of the 2 percent who hasn't, copy & paste this in your profile. If you have a true friend, copy this into your profile. 98 percent of the Internet population has a Myspace. If you are part of the 2 percent that can resist stupid fads, copy this into your profile. Too many people smoke marijuana. If you don't copy this into your profile. Too many people are on crack. If you're not, add this to your bio. Drugs are bad news. Spread the word! If you think writing FF stories is fun, copy this into your profile. If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fan fictions, copy this into your profile. If you think you have too many of these "copy and paste this into your profile" thingies, but have no intention of stopping now, copy and paste this into your profile. If you like copying and pasting these copy and paste things, copy and paste this into your profile. If you're random, and proud of it, post this onto your profile. If you think that being unique is better than being cool then put this on your profile. If you have embarrassing memories that make you want to smack yourself/someone else, copy this into your profile If you have ever breathed, copy and paste this into your profile. 92 percent of teenagers would die if Abercombie and Fitch told them it was uncool to breath. Copy this into your profile if you'd be part of the 8 percent laughing your butt off. 97% of people would cry if they saw Robert Pattinson (Edward from Twilight) standing on a skyscraper, about to jump. If you're one of the 3% who would sit there, eating popcorn and screaming "DO A BACKFLIP!" then copy and paste this as your status (Who is this mind reader o-o?) 99.5% of people think Justin Beiber is amazing and worship him. If you are part of the .5 percent who think he is secretly a 10-year-old girl, copy and paste this into your profile. If Justin Bieber went missing, 97% of people would search 2% would cry and if you are the 1% poking your new prisoner with a sharp stick then copy and paste this into your profile. If you've ever threatened your computer, copy and paste this into your profile Ninety-five percent of the kids out there are concerned with being popular and fitting in. If you're part of the five percent who aren't, copy this, put it in your profile, and add your name to the list. AnimeKittyCafe, Hyperactivley Bored, Gem W, Bara-Minamino, Yavie Aelinel, Crazy Billie Joe Loving Freak, Shadow929, SweetNCrazieSugarmuffin, The Komodo Dragon Phoenix, Empress Caroline of Tamaran, monkyluvr, Darth KenObi-Wan, JediWolfMaster,EwanLuvr4Ever, xXJedi Knight BlazeXx, JaneVolturi, LOSTSOULOFTHEUNDERWORLD, DarkAngel620, Dithinus, Wetstar, KatnissWriter, iDarkStar, hopeofabrightfuture If you wished you were a fighter on either the Autobots or Decepticons, copy & paste this to your profile and state whether you're on the Autobots or Decepticons after it in capital letters. AUTOBOT ...Actually I'm good with either 'cause I could always defect... If you think Transformers is the BEST THING since freedom of speech (scratch that...since BREATHING), copy and paste this in your profile and add your name to the list, Firefly95, JasiaVoorhees, autobot leader 101, Lexi2luv, Shizuka Taiyou, and ME...JESUS LUVS EVERYONE!! Sounddrive, CaMaRoFaN14, JustMakeLeftTurns, hopeofabrightfuture TRANSFORMERS! IF YOU LIKE TRANSFORMERS COPY AND PASTE THIS ONTO YOUR PROFILE!! AUTOBOTS! If you are on the side of the righteous Autobots paste this onto your profile! If you have a little bit of Decepticon in you, paste this onto your profile! l=lVl=l vs. l\ .M. /l 97 of teens only see the Transformers franchise because of Shia La Beouf or Megan Fox. Copy and paste this into your signature if you're the other 3 that goes to see things explode and robots beating the slag outta each other! (='.'=) This is Bunny. Weird is good, strange is bad, and odd is when you don't know which to call someone. Weird is the same as different, which is the same as unique, then weird is good. If you are weird and proud of it, copy this into your profile. If you are in lala land most of the time copy this onto your profile If you ever stared at someone for a really long time for no reason, put this in your profile Bad spellers of the world UNTIE! If you are a bad speller and proud of it copy this to your profile. If you are hardcore obsessed with a show or movie or book, copy and paste this on your profile. If you think that Uther Pendragon would accuse a rock of sorcery if he tripped on it, paste this on your profile. Pluto was declared no longer a planet on August 27, 2006, because it was "too small" and "off its orbit" for some scientist's liking. If you think Pluto should still be a planet, copy and paste this into your profile. If you're a total clutz, copy and paste this into your profile. If you've ever tripped over air, copy and paste this into your profile. If you randomly check your email every five minutes while on the computer, copy this into your profile. If you think that being unique is cooler then being cool, copy and paste this into your profile. If you get all giddy when you hear a trailer for your favorite TV show/movie is on TV, copy and paste this onto your profile. If you're not ashamed to call yourself a fangirl (or squeal like one), copy and paste this on your profile. If you've ever tripped up the stairs, copy and paste onto you profile. If you talk to inanimate objects, copy and paste to your profile. If you've been on the computer for hours on end reading fanfiction, copy and paste this into your profile. If you've ever burst out laughing in a quiet room, copy and paste this into your profile. If you are Merlin obsessed, copy this into your profile. If you automatically tune in to a conversation whenever anyone mentions Merlin, copy and paste this onto your profile! If you hear the voices of characters in your head, put this onto your profile. If you are obsessed with FanFiction, put this into your profile. If you've ever been called a bookworm and are proud of it, copy and paste this into your profile. Nerds are cool. Nerds are smart. Nerds will one day rule the universe. If you're a nerd and proud of it, copy and paste this into your profile. If you've ever asked a really stupid, obvious question, copy and paste this one your profile. If you have inside jokes...with yourself...copy and paste this into your profile. If you've ever talked to yourself, copy and paste this into your profile. If you have ever missed your mouth when trying to take a sip of water, copy and paste this into your profile. If you have ever forgotten what you were talking about in a conversation, copy and paste this onto your profile. If you have ever forgotten what you were going to say, right before you say it, copy this into your profile. Did you know the average American only reads 3 books a year? If you don't believe that it's even possible to read that little, copy and paste this onto your profile. If you like profiles that have a bunch of stuff in them, copy and paste this to your profile. If, for any particular reason, you have laughed during a movie that wasn't funny, copy and paste this into your profile. If you have strange dreams that never, ever make any sense whatsoever, put this into your profile. If your idea of fun is reading, copy and paste this into your profile. If you hear voices of the characters in your head...copy and paste this on your profile. Only crazy people can understand the brilliance of crazy things. If you are crazy and proud of it, copy and paste this into your profile! If you've ever thought about something when you were talking about something else, copy and paste this into your profile. If you ever sang the "I know a song that gets on everybody’s nerves" song copy this into your profile! If you and/or your best friend are certifiably insane, copy and paste this into your profile. If you love to write copy and paste this into your profile. I like cheese. I have seen purple cows. If two gooses are geese, then why aren't two mooses meese, and if two foots are feet, then why aren't two footballs feetball? Milk tastes good. People call me crazy, but I'm just random! If you are random and proud of it, copy and paste this into your profile. If, at least once a week, someone misspells or mispronounces your last name, copy and paste this into your profile. If at one time you misspelled or forgot how to spell a word less than four letters, copy and paste this into your profile. If several inanimate objects hate you, copy and paste this into your profile. If you and your friends have a nickname, title, or anything else for each other, copy and paste this into your profile. If you believe, serve, and love Jesus Christ and God, copy and paste this into your profile. If you believe that every child deserves a chance to grow up and go to school, copy and paste this into your profile. If you believe that teenagers are stereotyped, copy and paste this into your profile. If you can never type fast enough, copy and paste this into your profile. If you consider paper a safety hazard, copy and paste this into your profile. If you consider yourself a hypocrite for first thinking copy and pastes were ridiculous, and then copying and pasting things right and left, copy and paste this into your profile. If you didn't know that the Alphabet song and Twinkle Twinkle Little Star had the same tune and were both composed by Mozart, copy and paste this into your profile. (I didn't know Mozart composed them. Mind you, I'm not sure whether to believe it anyway.) If you easily finish one novel a day, copy and paste this into your profile. If you enjoy laughing at the pain or misfortune of others, copy and paste this into your profile. If you get excited over books, copy and paste this into your profile. If you hate those FanFiction.net ads that pop up right when you're about to click something important, copy and paste this into your profile. If you hate those irritating mosquitoes giving you mosquito bites, copy and paste this into your profile. If you have a friend who thinks Twilight is stupid, copy and paste this into your profile. If you have ever been called a bookworm and are proud of it, copy and paste this into your profile. If you have ever been so obsessed with a song you actually A) dream about it, B) sing it in school no matter who's listening or C) know the lyrics by heart and sing it no matter how off key you are, copy and paste this into your profile. If you have your own little world, copy and paste this into your profile. If you hear voices in your head, copy and paste this into your profile… …if you know that they are real, copy and paste this into your profile. If you hug cute toys when no one's looking, copy and paste this into your profile. (I hug them even when people are looking) Five billion dollars is enough money to buy everyone on earth a 10-Speed Bike. If you didn't know this, copy and paste this into your profile. If you think that life without computers is useless then copy this to your profile If you've ever walked/jogged/ran into a door copy and paste this to your profile If you ever tripped where there was a WATCH YOUR STEP SIGN, copy and paste If you hear voices of book characters in your head, copy and paste this on your profile. If you know someone who should be run over by a bus, copy and paste this into your profile. If you have ever tripped over your own feet/foot, copy this into your profile. If you or your best friend is insane, copy this into your profile. If you have a tendency to talk to yourself, copy and paste this into your profile. If you've ever been called weird and taken that as a complement, copy and paste this into your profile. (Wait, you mean it isn't?!) If you spend multiple hours each day reading or writing or a combination of both...copy and paste this into your profile. If you hear voices of the characters in your head... copy and paste this on your profile. If you are the complete opposite of normal, copy and paste this into your profile. If you can be quiet one second and hyper in another, but don't have mood swings, copy this in your profile. If you're stalking a fictional character, copy this to your profile. If you love rain, copy and past this on your profile. If you love snow, copy and paste this on your profile. If you like being utterly random copy and paste this on your profile. If you have ever laughed so hard you either choked, hyperventalated, had your sides cramp, or all of the above copy and paste this on your profile. If you have ever run into a door, copy this onto your profile. If you have ever slapped yourself and/or banged your head against a desk for no reason copy this on your profile. If you have ever said something that has nothing to do with the conversation copy this on your profile. I'm a fanfiction reader and writer, and I'm proud of it. If you are, copy and paste this line into your profile. A large percent of authors do not know the difference between 'your' and 'you're'. If you do know the difference, copy and paste this to your profile. (It's really easy. Just remember that 'your' displays ownership while 'you're' is 'you are'.) Don't you hate it when people whine and rant about Mary Sues even when the OCs are so awesome!? Then copy and paste this into your profile. Dear Math: I'm sick and tired of finding your "x". Just accept the fact that she is gone. Move on Dude. If you agree post this to your profile page. Fanfiction-Is my anti-drug! If I'm too busy reading, reviewing, and writing, I obviously don't have time for trivial things like drugs, under-aged drinking, and intimate situations that I'm too young for. Post this if you agree! 86 Hogwarts Rules: |
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