littlen00bgynhide bio
 Author has written 11 stories for Misc. Books, Harry Potter, Pet Shop of Horrors, Kingdom Hearts, Twilight, and Norse Mythology. Hello, everyone, and welcome to my merry little world of crackfics! I generally don't take myself too seriously when it comes to fan fiction and I haven't written seriously for YEARS, so please keep that in mind when reviewing! Many of my stories were written in high school, collaboratively during my post-high-school-intercollege-angst phase, and on my own to amuse myself. If they're not to your taste, that's okay! If you don't like my writing style, my grammatical style, or... what passes for my plot-style, that is okay, too! If a story is incomplete and has not been updated for several months or years, please feel free to send suggestions to me. I will even accept whole chapters, and will credit you in the A/Ns! Update: I'm expecting a baby in July 2020, so if you enjoy my writing, please feel free to contribute to my Ko-fi. It's /sigynbean |
Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .
Midnight Tasting by crochetaway reviews
An encounter with Lucius Malfoy during the war leaves Hermione wanting more. When Lucius tracks her down after the war, Hermione is surprised to find he wants more. And just what is going on with Severus Snape? A story with more lemons than plot. Complete
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 15 - Words: 61,287 - Reviews: 331 - Favs: 1,000 - Follows: 813 - Updated: 9/19/2018 - Published: 4/10/2018 - [Hermione G., Lucius M., Severus S.] - Complete
Lucius' Fail-Proof Way To Gain Power by crochetaway reviews
Hermione Granger did not want to marry Lucius Malfoy, but when a marriage law is passed, she finds herself in the awkward position of marrying a man twice her age or being cast out of the wizarding world entirely. Lucius Malfoy is extremely pleased with his choice of wife, and he will do anything and everything to further his own political power. Complete.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 3 - Words: 17,571 - Reviews: 38 - Favs: 383 - Follows: 145 - Published: 4/22/2018 - [Hermione G., Lucius M.] Kingsley S. - Complete
Relative Sins by crochetaway reviews
Draco knows he shouldn't be thinking of his stepmother while wanking but damn if Princess Hermione wasn't the hottest little thing he had ever seen. Plus she certainly had not minded when he had walked in on her bathing, instead, she dismissed all her servants and made Draco dry her body. Also, Lucius was probably too old to keep up with her stamina, wasn't he? Oneshot. Complete.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 13,558 - Reviews: 20 - Favs: 222 - Follows: 64 - Published: 4/1/2018 - Hermione G., Draco M., Lucius M. - Complete
Chess Is All We Have by crochetaway reviews
Lucius Malfoy is imprisoned in Azkaban. He's content with his life and the semi-relationship he has with Auror Hermione Granger. What will he do to protect it? QLFC Season 5, Round 13. Oneshot. Complete.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,537 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 55 - Follows: 24 - Published: 11/16/2017 - [Hermione G., Lucius M.] - Complete
Couple Shades of Taylor by Waterslave Hotfish reviews
Jason Taylor makes one screw up and loses his military career. Only a deal with Satan himself, Christian Grey, will let him keep his daughter in his life. Complications arise when Taylor falls for the housekeeper and wants to save the most innocent of Christian's conquests. How far can he go without sacrificing what's most important to himself?
Fifty Shades Trilogy - Rated: M - English - Drama/Suspense - Chapters: 16 - Words: 38,592 - Reviews: 117 - Favs: 55 - Follows: 138 - Updated: 1/23/2015 - Published: 3/1/2013
Frosted Petals by KAHTz reviews
No one ever said they would play fair. MarluxiaxVexen. The two 'rivals' seem to have fallen for each other, but neither of them know about the others feelings. Just what lengths will they go to to get exactly what they crave?
Kingdom Hearts - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 1,643 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 8 - Follows: 10 - Updated: 7/5/2010 - Published: 11/23/2009 - Marluxia, Vexen
Beserker Claws Prove Quite Suspicious by GrasperGroupie reviews
XemSai, told mainly from Saix's internal dialouge. Beserker claws can be quite the tell-tale sign of rough-housing.
Kingdom Hearts - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,509 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 44 - Follows: 4 - Published: 2/25/2010 - Xemnas, Saïx - Complete
Simple by Alphabet Pie reviews
Vexen discovers a wonderful way to get Marluxia to do what he likes... lemon. 411.
Kingdom Hearts - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 578 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 15 - Follows: 1 - Published: 2/5/2010 - Vexen, Marluxia - Complete
Whip it Good by BunnyToast reviews
There has to be some reason Xemnas always forgives Marluxia for being greedy...
Kingdom Hearts - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,342 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 2 - Published: 2/2/2010 - Xemnas, Marluxia - Complete
Teacher's Pet by Arxaith reviews
I never knew I could fall in love...until HE walked into my life. He stopped my heart with just his gaze. But...it's wrong to love your teacher, right? AkuZeku - based on a rp
Kingdom Hearts - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 12 - Words: 37,799 - Reviews: 121 - Favs: 156 - Follows: 45 - Updated: 1/2/2010 - Published: 5/18/2009 - Axel, Zexion - Complete
Melt by Ki-chanForPresident reviews
A New Years night, and Roxas likes popsicles...a lot... And Axel likes popsicles, too...but in a way where you don't eat them... PWP.
Kingdom Hearts - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,080 - Reviews: 24 - Favs: 55 - Follows: 4 - Published: 12/31/2009 - Axel, Roxas - Complete
When An Experiment Goes Right by Sharzam reviews
Marluxia x Vexen. Marluxia is assistant to Vexen and has been secretly checking him out for the last few years. What happens when the two of them are trapped in a windowless, locked-from-the-inside room full of aphrodisiac? Smex, of course. AU, OOCness.
Kingdom Hearts - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,520 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 44 - Follows: 3 - Published: 12/30/2009 - Vexen, Marluxia - Complete
Afterstory by Alphabet Pie reviews
A little something coming out of my dusty hard drive for 4.11.09. More or less an Ikea lemon. Marluxia and Vexen argue amongst... other things. Happy 411 Day! :3
Kingdom Hearts - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,965 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 25 - Follows: 1 - Published: 11/4/2009 - Marluxia, Vexen - Complete
Fanboy's Dream by Schizzar reviews
Roxas finally gets to meet two of his heroes, the guitarist and the singer of one of his favorite bands, Axel and Demyx. However, he was very unaware of what he was getting himeself into. Akurokudemy. A make up fic for missing Akudemy day and Akuroku day.
Kingdom Hearts - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,914 - Reviews: 35 - Favs: 97 - Follows: 23 - Updated: 10/11/2009 - Published: 8/15/2009 - Axel, Roxas - Complete
Maximum Hell by Sharzam reviews
Didn't know what to put this under. It's not romance, that's for sure. But there is sex. So be prepared. It's dark. Saix is more sadistic than usual. SaixAxel. YAOI. Don't like, don't read. ONESHOT.
Kingdom Hearts - Rated: M - English - Angst/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,809 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 42 - Follows: 3 - Published: 10/4/2009 - Saïx, Axel - Complete
Interruptions by LarcSakurai reviews
XemSai. Saix refuses to let an interruption ruin his "private" meeting with the Superior.
Kingdom Hearts - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 396 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 30 - Follows: 1 - Published: 9/21/2009 - Xemnas, Saïx - Complete
The Other Side isn't so Green by Sammy-Dee reviews
Roxas hates his parents. They're rarely home and always telling him what to do. Sometimes he wishes he didn't have parents at all, but that might change when he befriends the new kid in school whose life is a bit worse. -BEING REWRITTEN- 2/26/12
Kingdom Hearts - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 20 - Words: 48,657 - Reviews: 233 - Favs: 202 - Follows: 65 - Updated: 7/13/2009 - Published: 5/12/2009 - Axel, Roxas - Complete
Hello, the Works by Arxaith reviews
Vexen longed to caress that perfect skin. Bend him, break him, make him bleed. He would have pinned Roxas to the floor right then and there. But some things call for a different approach....VexRoku DUH M for a reason
Kingdom Hearts - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,480 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 17 - Follows: 1 - Published: 6/22/2009 - Vexen, Roxas - Complete
All Mine by Eloxinc reviews
Vexen has a bit of a possesiveness problem... VexRoku, Rape, Slight Abuse
Kingdom Hearts - Rated: M - English - Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 733 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 27 - Follows: 6 - Published: 6/16/2009 - Vexen, Roxas - Complete
The Virtuous by Silarcta reviews
In a godforsaken world, what is needed to make the faithful open their eyes and see that sin doesn’t have to be so bad after all? VexenMarluxia AU Lemon and a great deal of nifty decorated crack.
Kingdom Hearts - Rated: M - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 11 - Words: 93,195 - Reviews: 235 - Favs: 127 - Follows: 96 - Updated: 3/16/2009 - Published: 8/9/2007 - Marluxia, Vexen
Damaged People by Silarcta reviews
A short ficlet with Vexen and Marluxia, describing a hate/love relationship. Sexual content, but nothing exceedingly explicit. Thanks to Plasmodesmata for beta reading.
Kingdom Hearts - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,396 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 17 - Follows: 2 - Published: 1/29/2009 - Vexen, Marluxia - Complete
Vines by Arxaith reviews
I held my breath. Something snaked around my wrists and ankles, forcing my legs apart. Thorns pricked at my skin. I tried pulling at the thick, healthy vines around my limbs, but the thorns began to pierce my flesh. MarVex r&r plz! :D
Kingdom Hearts - Rated: M - English - Romance/Horror - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,463 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 31 - Follows: 2 - Published: 1/26/2009 - Marluxia, Vexen - Complete
The Sweet Treat by ShiniBarton reviews
A hot summer day brings Marluxia to Xem's ice cream truck. But soon Marly realizes he wants more than ice cream... -YAOI-
Kingdom Hearts - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,563 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 25 - Follows: 3 - Published: 11/2/2008 - Xemnas, Marluxia - Complete
Those Lacking Spines by Organization VI reviews
Immune to a suspicious parasite by merit of their manly looks, Xaldin, Vexen and Lexaeus set out on a journey to save the rest of Organization XIII from the biggest nightmare of all: stupid fanfiction.
Kingdom Hearts - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 13 - Words: 111,474 - Reviews: 1917 - Favs: 2,403 - Follows: 673 - Updated: 9/18/2008 - Published: 4/20/2006 - Xaldin, Vexen - Complete
Proving My Theory by Awebeco Bento Productions reviews
After witnessing strange events within the Organization, Xemnas questions the established beliefs about Nobodies. Can Saix help him prove his theory? XemmySaix. Rated M for language and lemon.
Kingdom Hearts - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,057 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 30 - Follows: 4 - Published: 7/31/2008 - Xemnas, Saïx - Complete
Ebony Petals by SaixMoon34 reviews
Marluxia has waited a long time to receive his specially prepared gift. But now that he's without interruptions, he plans to get it. Now. Reviews more than welcome.
Kingdom Hearts - Rated: M - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,925 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 8 - Published: 7/20/2008 - Marluxia, Xemnas - Complete
As the rain falls by 4b4ndon3d 4ccoun7 reviews
Vexen gets frustrated and takes out his anger on Marluxia. Will he swallow his pride and apologize, or leave Marluxia to suffer the effects of "heart"break? MarVex, 411. Fluff/slight Angst. OOCness, but it's cute! ...I think. Oneshot.
Kingdom Hearts - Rated: K - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,675 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 14 - Published: 5/30/2008 - Marluxia, Vexen - Complete
Unfit by Drowning in Ice reviews
Marluxia's musings about what he'd like to do with Xemnas.
Kingdom Hearts - Rated: T - English - Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,181 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 13 - Follows: 1 - Published: 5/27/2008 - Marluxia, Xemnas - Complete
Narcissism by Silarcta reviews
There are several ways to use a clone, something Zexion is painfully aware of. Zexion/Zexion ONESHOT
Kingdom Hearts - Rated: M - English - Supernatural - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,428 - Reviews: 19 - Favs: 50 - Follows: 3 - Published: 3/26/2008 - Zexion, Zexion - Complete
Waiting by A Spot of Bother reviews
AU. They promised to meet in the next life but they have to find each other first. AkuRoku. Complete.
Kingdom Hearts - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 20 - Words: 83,803 - Reviews: 1354 - Favs: 1,896 - Follows: 532 - Updated: 12/14/2007 - Published: 2/3/2007 - Axel, Roxas - Complete
The Blood Game by Silarcta reviews
This fanfic contains extreme gore and other repulsive themes. You don’t want to read this. Pairings: MarVex and ZekuAlmostEveryone ONESHOT
Kingdom Hearts - Rated: M - English - Horror/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 17,652 - Reviews: 115 - Favs: 148 - Follows: 12 - Published: 11/4/2007 - Vexen, Marluxia - Complete
And Then There Was Blooming by Silarcta reviews
All flowers bloom, and when they do they rather have someone to witness their beauty. Graphic lemon, crack, obscenities. MarluxiaVexen. If you're a pervert you'll probably find this funny.
Kingdom Hearts - Rated: M - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,229 - Reviews: 37 - Favs: 60 - Follows: 6 - Published: 4/16/2007 - Vexen, Marluxia - Complete
Conflict by 13th Dead End reviews
Why do you struggle so? Why do you hate me so? [Xemnas Saix][Yaoiness, limey. Semi assault and rape, rated for mature content.]
Kingdom Hearts - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,509 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 30 - Follows: 5 - Published: 2/7/2007 - Xemnas, Saïx - Complete
The Scent Of You by Zorta Enzane reviews
A sweet scent seems to be bothering Vexen everyday while he's trying to work, he can't figure out what it is or where it came from... not to mention, how to get rid of it. Vexen/Marluxia ONESHOT
Kingdom Hearts - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,574 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 20 - Published: 1/17/2007 - Vexen, Marluxia - Complete
Springtime by Silarcta reviews
Marluxia shows Vexen exactly whose boss in Castle Oblivion. Rape, lemon and very graphic content. You are warned.
Kingdom Hearts - Rated: M - English - Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,689 - Reviews: 31 - Favs: 61 - Follows: 5 - Published: 12/18/2006 - Vexen, Marluxia - Complete
Anything Except That by Silarcta reviews
Vexen says he can do anything so Zexion decides to do a nasty bet with him. Lemon[VexenMarluxia]. FINALLY COMPLETED!
Kingdom Hearts - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 5 - Words: 13,397 - Reviews: 93 - Favs: 84 - Follows: 10 - Updated: 12/3/2006 - Published: 11/5/2006 - Vexen, Marluxia - Complete
When It Rains On The Moon by coppelia's heartbeat reviews
[Xemnas x Saïx] Saïx didn't regret not living for himself. But before he leaves for good, he wants an answer from the man he's been living for.
Kingdom Hearts - Rated: M - English - Angst/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,745 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 24 - Follows: 4 - Published: 11/5/2006 - Saïx, Xemnas - Complete
Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .
Deadly Lust, Perfect Trust reviews
AU. Young barista Carlisle is startled by the beautiful boy who walks into his cafe.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 10 - Words: 23,447 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 2 - Updated: 10/10/2015 - Published: 6/2/2015 - Carlisle, Edward - Complete
Sigyn's Story Book
A brief retelling of Norse mythology from the point of view of Loki's wife, Sigyn. Naturally, most of it takes place before their marriage and describes how she grew to fall in love with him, and how she became known for her loyalty to him.
Norse Mythology - Rated: K+ - English - Fantasy/Romance - Chapters: 3 - Words: 1,224 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 2 - Published: 6/2/2015 - Loki, Sigyn
Vexen's Escort reviews
[AU] Introverted Vexen is introduced to flamboyant escort Marluxia.
Kingdom Hearts - Rated: T - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 5 - Words: 12,791 - Reviews: 17 - Favs: 15 - Follows: 3 - Updated: 6/2/2015 - Published: 4/6/2015 - Vexen, Marluxia
Serleina van Rainsfeld and the Skin of a Killer reviews
Chopsticks High doesn't know what's hit it when psychotic Serleina comes to town! Just how well will she fit in, and will she ever reconcile her differences with the Cullen family?
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Parody/Supernatural - Chapters: 4 - Words: 12,466 - Reviews: 1 - Published: 4/6/2015
The Tainted Age of Sorcery reviews
What do you get when you cross over Harry Potter with a teen fiction piece written by a preteen? Read this story to find out! Warning: Contains a self-insert Mary Sue.
Crossover - Misc. Books & Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 8 - Words: 8,249 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 2 - Updated: 4/5/2015 - Published: 8/27/2009 - Draco M.
Pet Shop of Calculus Stories reviews
A bunch of shorts, a few of which are actually finished! ZOMG!
Pet Shop of Horrors - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 7 - Words: 16,793 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 12 - Follows: 10 - Updated: 4/5/2015 - Published: 12/21/2009 - Count D, Leon
How Marluxia REALLY became Lord of Castle Oblivion reviews
Marluxia is tired of no one acknowledging his awesomeness... This cannot end well.
Kingdom Hearts - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 2 - Words: 1,975 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 2 - Updated: 4/5/2015 - Published: 2/28/2010 - Marluxia, Xemnas - Complete
Harry Potter and the Pet Shop of Hogwarts reviews
Based off of Harry Potter 5, and loosely based off of the orig. Pet Shop of Horrors series, not including PSH: Tokyo. My ex wrote all the Count D parts and I think she wrote him OOC but whatever XD
Crossover - Harry Potter & Pet Shop of Horrors - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 11 - Words: 11,256 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 39 - Follows: 26 - Updated: 4/5/2015 - Published: 8/29/2009 - Complete
Harry Potter and the Owls of the Nunnery
16-year-old Harry Potter is forced to give up his newborn son to a Nobody, who takes over Potions class under mysterious circumstances.
Crossover - Harry Potter & Kingdom Hearts - Rated: T - English - Parody/Angst - Chapters: 12 - Words: 8,941 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 4 - Published: 4/5/2015
Traitors reviews
It was so simple. Marluxia had only ever asked one thing of Vexen, and Vexen chose his own destruction...
Kingdom Hearts - Rated: T - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,347 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 1 - Published: 6/17/2011 - Marluxia, Vexen - Complete
Philosophy in the Laboratory Bedroom reviews
Marluxia questions Xemnas's motives and begins the plot to take over the Organization, from the not-quite-coziness of Vexen's creaky twin-sized bed. Oneshot, implied Mar/Vex.
Kingdom Hearts - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,668 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 2 - Published: 4/25/2010 - Marluxia, Vexen - Complete
