The Review Game

Hello, all, and welcome to The Review Game.

So this game has been spread around on multiple forums, and I think it's great. Actually got this off PJFC (no surprise there, huh?) from my friend achieving elysium.

We all like reviews on our stories, right? I'm talking about the deep, detailed kind of review, where the reviewer doesn't actually put a 'good story! love it.' on there or something like that. I mean the ones that actually take the time to write what they liked about your story and what you could improve on. The long kind.

This game will allow you to get that kind of review on your story, all reviewed by us (your friends on the forum). That way, you get to know what your friends (or, hopefully you're friends) think of your story. If you think the people who post and talk on here aren't your friends, please don't say that, because it makes us forum buddies sad.

Anyway, the rules are really simple:

1. No explicit language on any reviews. Meaning cussing and 'bad' words.

Ones such as 'heck' and 'darn' are permitted.

The explicit language may be considered rude or may cause triggers on reviews.

2. Please include:

What you liked.

What could be better. (Constructive criticism.)

Whatever that wasn't mentioned that you usually enjoy having in reviews.

3. Please warn of slash/femslash/lemons/limes/stuff like that so the reviewers know what they're getting themselves into.

4. Tell the truth.

How to Play:

I will begin the game by asking one of you to review on my story. After that, please tell me you reviewed, put your review, then ask someone to review on your story. Give warnings (see above) and give us a hyperlink.

Basically, you review for the post above yours.

For example:

@NonexistingUser

Dear ______, I reviewed your story ______.

This story was a stroke of genius.

I like the way you portrayed Daphne, and the use of the two quotes were very inspiring.

I especially liked that sentence," I watched the little girl disappear through the portal and sighed. There was a good chance I would never see my sister again."

However, there are some grammatical mistakes I'd like to point out. The comma after witched was not needed, and it should've been 'I walked to the palace.' not 'I walk to the palace.' Also, make sure you stay in first person, because at times it was a little unclear.

Great story, hope to see more.

Can someone review my story ________?

@Blahblahblah

Dear @NonexistantUser, I reviewed your story ______.

I think it was a very good read.

(etc. etc.)

Can someone review my story _________?

That's about it! If you're confused about my explaining, please contact me somehow and ask.

Remember to put a URL, review, and ask. I will begin and will also be putting reviews down.

I'll start us off.

Can someone please review me and SME's story Out of the Darkness? I don't care what chapter you review (since there are so many) but I'd love it if you'd read a lot first.

Yo, PierceTheVeils. I reviewed what you have for your story Out of the Darkness so far, as in this is a general review for all 20 chapters. I posted a review there and now a copy of that is here as well. Sorry if it's a big read.

Well, well...here we go. *cracks knuckles*

I was initally hesitant to pick this fanfiction up with all of the weird names and everything and I couldn't follow and whatever but wow, I really should be paying attention to other political drama fics going on. It's actually interesting to see how other people approach world building, mystery and intrigue. Veerrry interesting.

The only thing that makes me cringe here is how brain-dead and biased the main cast, as in the Winx and the Specialists, is (even if they're portrayed that way in the show). That does not mean that it doesn't work. I can see how it flows with the plot, and I can also understand how you're doing your best to keep everything as canon as possible. Actually I could bear reading through all of it except...if you could only see me pulling my hair every time I have to read about Bloom being a ditzy airhead (you've captured the canon Bloom ever so perfectly). I don't know I'm extremely biased against very canon renderings of Bloom, she's never a dumb chick to me. But regardless, for all the main cast I don't really feel any sympathy or concern towards them at all. I'm like omg just dig yourself a hole and DIE already.

Now for everyone who ISN'T the main protagonist cast? I'm super digging their storylines. (I can tell where the love is) From Roxy to Mirta, to the Trix, Xander and of course Reilei. I have tons of fun reading all their little shenanigans and what they're all getting up to. I really feel the character development with these characters. I really feel sorry for Xander especially, he feels like the scapegoat in all of this, I just want to punch all the Winx and their Specialist boyfriends in their pudgy faces when I think about what happened to him. So once again, (I'm back to ranting about the main-cast) if you wanted to go for the cringe-worthy main-cast, you got them right. Maybe they'll mature more once the story progresses? But still, I can't shake this feeling that there are people in the main-cast who have got other things going on in the background...I'm not sure. We'll wait and see.

As for world building and all the plots happening behind the scenes? I love the pacing. With each chapter a little more is revealed and now I'm starting to think the monarchy of Borreania may not be as clean-cut as people think it is and that something is definitely hidden...clues given by the existence of the hidden village and their dodgy a** news network. Someone is clearly blocking the Winx's investigation and it has to be someone in a powerful position in their society. I don't think its the Ancestral Witches, they wouldn't bother with meddling with technology like that, and I'm pretty sure they were the ones behind the attack at Lake Roccalucce. Eh. In the end, I can't wait to find out why the Witches want a thief fairy and why she was framed as well...I feel like its part of a much bigger scheme. And also, I'm pretty sure when they say "freeing" the Trix of their obligations translates to killing them. No loose ends after all. :L

Then there are the other tidbits that make the world of your fanfiction complex. Besides the usual witch vs. fairy blabber and teacher woes, there's that what's up with Daphne; I like your take with how badly she is reacting to having a human body again. For some reason when I read that bit where Daphne was mentioned, I kept thinking that Bloom made the Sirenix wish ultimately so that she's no longer in line for the throne so she can have none of that responsibility being Domino's crown princess and keep on being a ditsy bum. In any case, I'm also interested to see if we'll meet any of the other rulers of the Magical Dimension.

Overall however, character interaction, descriptions and all are relatable and interesting. I like how you're making the effort to humanize them and feel real instead of flat. In the early chapters your landscape/surroundings descriptions could be tweaked better but it's progressing well with subsequent chapters so I'm not too worried about that. And man, and I thought my pacing for mystery was pretty slow but once again I like stories that take their time.

So okay to round up finally, your story has interesting characterizations, world building, plot progression are the positives obviously, against that one negative of overall dead-brain main cast. Hmm...you win some you lose some I guess. I can't say the story is a definite favourite...yet. I'll wait for more of the plot to unfold before I deliver my final verdict. :P

Hope you had a fun time reading all of this.

I would ask someone to review the main story I'm working on currently but I want to get the update done for that first before I request. Instead I'd like to see what people think of an old one shot I have, since I'd like to do more of those kinds of self-contained stories. Somebody please review Ember Light.

Outsider, I just reviewed your one-shot, Ember Light.

This was a very good one shot. I very much enjoyed it and thought you conveyed the emotions greatly.

With Oritel, I could really understand why he would play with the light. Showing us readers the reasons for him doing so and the affects of being imprisoned once again. I thought you did a great job with his character, and the other characters as well.

I kind of wish there was a little more of Marion's feelings captured in this one-shot, though that is more of personal preference. What you had of Marion's character was wonderfully written and I could have a emotional connection with her, too. The emotional connection came from her injury, that won't heal, and her growing weakness.

The only thing I had trouble with was the very small use of names. I don't mean you should have used it a bunch of times, but sometimes I would get confused between "woman" and "girl." It is not a big issue, I just wanted to bring it to your attention.

Overall, I thought this was a wonderfully, beautifully written one-shot. You really captured the characters emotions and appearances, like their garments becoming dirty and old. You did a wonderful job and I look forward to reading more of your stories.

Now, I haven't updated it a while, but could somebody please review Sinister Presence. There are nine chapters to it, so far. You don't have to read them all to review, though it would be greatly appreciated.

I love review games, I'm so happy that the forum got one! Now Art, I have had the pleasure of reviewing the first five chapters of your story 'Sinister Presence'.

Hello! :) This review will also be posted on WCFC. Alrighty, here we go (ie. my review for your first five chapters).

I have to admit that I was drawn into the story by both the title and the summary. I clicked on it in the search of a good read and well, I certainly haven't been disappointed so far (and the action's only picking up!).

Firstly, I have to say that you have a great introduction. It pulls the reader in from the start and makes them want to read on. The whole battle plot point has really intrigued me and I must say that it is thrilling to read a story with a seemingly unknown threat hanging over the character's heads. I liked the ceremony part of the chapter and the dragon. The character of Sondra was once again something which intrigued me. I don't usually like OCs very much but I thought that she has been written very well (so far). I liked her 'disagreement' with Saladin, he does seem like a traditionalist, doesn't he?

I really liked chapter 2 and the classes. It was nice to read the Winx's lesson and I loved the bit with the silly name game, a cute little touch. I LOVED the boys' yoga class and the exchange between Helia and Riven was hillarious. You write those little interactions between the characters so well, bringing them to life. I'm really enjoying all the Faragonda investigation stuff too and her conversations with Griselda and Saladin. And Griffin.

Faragonda cancelled the ball - :(. I liked Roxy's introduction (late on the first day, haha!) and I'm liking the conversations between Sondra and the guys, the part about magic was very intersting. How can someone be given magic? (I quite like Sondra's character overall.)

Then there was Mirta's disappearance which really got me worried followed by sinister ending of this chapter! Who the heck is this Tamal? And why does he need a new soul?! I'm worried!

I love how this is getting more mysterious and scary as the chapters go on, and the little hints you keep dropping throughout the chapters. I love the use of the letter with the (so far) unknown author, a very clever technique which sustains the reader's interest. I haven't seen many writers ise this technique here and you use it well! The contents of the letter are very nicely alinged with the comtents of the chapter. Is this one of the Winx's children writing from the future maybe?

I like your writing style and I think that your pacing is quite good. You are also skillfully managing the three plots - Winx, Faragonda and co. and Specialists and Sondra. Each and every scene is written very well and in my opinion needs to be there. There is no abundance of filler scenes which is good - a few here and there can't hurt but the plot does need to move along. So like I said, good pacing.

I like how you write the characters and their interactions, true to canon yet you manage to make them interesting and make me interested and invested in them. You also manage to mostly give all your cast a fair treatment, there isn't a character which is favoured and portrayed above the others as all are vital to the plot.

Grammar and spelling are fantastic so well done on the technical front!

If there is one thing I would maybe try to improve (and note that I'm reviewing only five chapters in so you might have already improved on this) is the emotions and emotional aspect of the story. The characters appear at times to be quite distant and even the strong narration sometimes can't compensate for this. Perhaps putting a little more emphasis on the characters and their emotions could help to make them more relatable to the reader? Tuning in on those emotions can sometimes be the key. I do think that you have improved on this since the first chapter, the emotions of Flora on finding out that Mirta was gone were spot on.

Overall, I must say that I'm really liking what I have read so far. It is usually easy for me to tell whether a story is worth reading a few chapters in and I do think that yours is! I will definitely read on and keep a close watch on the story, it has great potential and I'm excited to see where you will take this! Fantastic work so far, keep it up!

Could the next person please either review my oneshot story The Actor or one of the chapters of my main multi-chapter story Despair. Thank you! :)

Dear Pani,

I have reviewed the first chapter of your story Despair. I will eventually review all three chapters but that will have to be at a later date:

This is for the Review Exchange on WCFC. The review will also be posted there.

Here we go (cracks knuckles).

So I was going to take my review from The Actor, but then I decided this would be more helpful to you. Besides, I've been eying this story for a while. So here I am, taking a crack at it.

Wow, that was intense! I love cynical, villain-heavy stories, and your portrayal of Darkar is really interesting. I love his 'who can defeat a god?' line, even if I never pictured him as a god. So Bloom is dead, and Roxy's been taken by the Black Circle? Sounds amazingly hopeless.

I honestly don't know why I hadn't picked up this story sooner. Maybe it was the A/N at the beginning. I don't think it was entirely necessary, and if you didn't deliver the darkness you advertised 100%, it would have gone badly for you. You can include exposition in the story. The things you put in there could be in the story. Sorry, but it's a pet peeve of mine when people include things in A/Ns that belong in the story. A/Ns are extra: I believe the story should stand on it's own.

Other than a few overdramatic bits. this story is perfect. I need to calm down before I keep reading!

So just a few small things to watch, and a great concept overall. Love it all! Thanks for sharing a beautiful fanfiction, and I'll see you on the far side!

That all said, will someone please review my collection of one shots titled The Lone Princess? It was done for The Five Things Challenge, and is my way of learning about Diaspro.

Hey Pierce been a while since I've done this sort of thing but ah I forgot to label the review...oops I'm sort of dead tired anyway sorry.

I did a general review of your story the Lone Princess. Hope you found it interesting.

Oh wow it feels like forever since I've written a review, let's see if I'm still sharp...

I'm never sure if I'll like a story that follows characters close to their canon depictions but I do somewhat appreciate authors who can do it well. I can't because I have the incessant need to make everything dark and more political and just really, really...long. So I really like reading writers who can convey so much in not to many words but like wait why am I talking about this...

ANYWAY. I like how you've portrayed Diaspro in every chapter and I can see how it's a character study into trying to take apart her canon portrayal in the series. I can see how Diaspro is essentially a creation of her class and environment and how she feels her life has no meaning after the future she had been bred to do has been snatched from her by a girl who appeared out of nowhere. I also like how you have the sense of characters "sharing the blame" for how events played out but I haven't really seen it yet in this story, if you're planning to implement it that is because this is a story focusing on Diaspro, so yeah.

Out of all of them so far Chapter 2 is where I was most interested because it wasn't essentially retelling events and trying to see them from a different perspective at how Diaspro reflects on how badly her life turned out in the end and the story of those two princesses. Even though she's essentially a b*** it is sad to see that one way or another Diaspro is bound in some system of obedience and control because of the life she has led. Always fascinating to unpack characters...makes you wonder if she'll ever have a happy ending.

There are a couple of spelling errors here and there still like calling Diaspro a "princes". Maybe fanfiction should just install an automatic proofreader or something. Idk.

I'm not sure if this is finished or how many you're supposed to do but you're going to be writing about her dealings with Baltor right? I'll be interested to see what you think of that.

I feel like I've been forever away from writing so I kind of need as much feedback as I can...because I feel ridiculously long winded. If anyone could review my story Death Came for the Princess (who doesn't review it on a regular basis obviously lol) I'd be happy as that's my main story at the moment.

thewanderingoutsider, I reviewed the first two chapters for Death Came for the Princess. Here's what I said:

This review will also be posted on the Review Exchange.

I like (scratch that. I love) the fact that Bloom is the dead princess. I don't think any other princess (Stella, Layla, Galatea and even Krystal) deserves to die. Bloom is just an annoying, stuck-up little brat, and I hate her. Absolutely hate her.

Anyway, before I deviate TOO much, I do like the plot of this story. I like the details you put in about Stella and Nova at the beginning. It really added to the feel of the story.

The debate thing was nice as well.

One thing I want to say you should improve on is spelling and grammar. It's not that bad but it needs a little work. That's all for now. See you later!

Someone please review my story On the Run. There are only three chapters so far so shouldn't take too long.

CrystalHauntress, I have reviewed the first chapter of your story On the Run. Great job, I certainly hope to come back and read more. Here's what I said:

Hey, Crystal! Here's my review for the WCFC Review Exchange.

Firstly, I must say your summary is exciting and draws the reader in. It's quite a skill to get that right and it often has a major impact on the success of your story, so to speak, so well done on that. Your opening paragraph itself was a good start to the story and a perfect opening for everything that followed in the prologue. I loved the closing paragraph, it set up the tension pretty well and intrigued the reader. I definitely want to keep on reading to find out what happens next!

Grammar and spelling was as always, up to point. I did catch one phrase which looked odd to me "..like some and used honey to...", the 'and' should perhaps be 'had'? Oh and, "three whole minutes past", I think the 'past' should be 'passed'. But other than that it's very good and those things are really minor and easy to fix, so I wouldn't stress. :) I must say I like your writing style overall, it is nice, natural and the whole thing flows nicely from one point to another as you read it so great job on that! Some good descriptions, metaphors, similes etc, in here too which always makes me happy, so again, great job!

Now, plot. Interesting set up for the OC and the story though this kind of plot (miserable life so I'll run away from home etc) could possibly have a tendency to stray into the cliche territory. I'm sure that won't happen with you since you're a very good, imaginative author but just something to keep in mind. :) His sisters are totally the Trix! Totally! I call it now! I like the OC but like Pierce has pointed out, he does come across in the narrative as younger than what you portray him to be, maybe 14-15 ish, at least in my mind. That's not a big problem though and it doesn't really take away from the story too much. He seems to be likeable and I'm looking forward to reading more and finding out more about him. I'm not big on OCs usually but I like the look of this one and I can't wait to see how you will build his character up! So yup, I would say that the characterisation is pretty good from what I've read so far.

Overall, a good, solid, intriguing beginning to what I'm sure will be a fabulous story! Keep up the great work! :)

- Pani

Next person, take your pick amongst my oneshots (The Actor/ A Howling In The Wilderness) or a chapter of my multichap, Despair. I'd love some critique on some of the later chapters. So basically, have a read at whatever strikes your fancy! :) (Sorry for lack of links, the box is messing up for some reasons and I'll edit to include them if I can.)

Pani, I reviewed the first chapter of They Say That The World Was Built For Two. This is what I said:

This review will also be posted on the Review Exchange on WCFC.

This was great. The complexity (is that the right word? Or is it complexion?) of Baltor and Griffin is really well done. I love how Griffin tries to keep her feelings at bay - because from how I see it, she still has feelings for him but is trying to hide them. But I could still be wrong.

Oh, Baltor! He was so well portrayed in this, and even though I don't ship Griffin/Baltor (far from it, actually. Baltor belongs with Bloom) I can see the connection between them here. I love the way he treated her, acting as if she should be jealous.

Overall, I loved this. Even though it's not my favourite pairing, it was enjoyable. Brilliant.

Next person, if stories from other fandoms are allowed, then can you review Their Young One Gone (the Sherlock fandom) (warning: slash) or if not, Clueless. (Or maybe you can review both? Please?)

Hey Phoenix, I reviewed Clueless and I have to say that I loved it. This is my review:

This review will also be posted on the review exchange game on WCFC. I was initially a little uncertain about reading this fic since I'm a huge fan of Riven and Musa, but as I read it I couldn't help but read it again and again. I loved every single moment , my most favourite being where Adam asks Musa to return to him and where both of them remember what Matlin told them. Riven was completely in character and I can totally picture him saying something like this in the series. Overall it was wonderful and I really liked it.

Can someone please review Ocean's Hope ? It's a Politea and Daphne story which tries to expand on why they got Sirenix.

Link :/s/11471578/1/Ocean-s-Hope

Hi Fleur, this is my review for Ocean's Hope (hint - it was really good :) )

Hey Fleur, this will also be posted on the review exchange on WCFC.

I think that your inspiration for this story is really good, and your plot definitely is very interesting. I like how we get to see Daphne and Politea as friends, and see their backgrounds for once. The setting for this story is also perfectly timed, with the Ancestral witches, and its a nice change of scenery from our classic heroes the Winx themselves. I really loved Pentheselia's inspirational speech in the first chapter too. Overall, a nice refreshing story, with an interesting plot. Looking forward to reading more of this and seeing where you're taking it all!

Can someone please review my story So Much for Happy Endings ? It has 4 chapters, and I'll warn you now that the first two aren't great, and in my opinion it sort of kicks in at the third chapter, but yes, I would love some advice and such on it! :)

Thank you so much Gemma :)

Hey Gemma, here's my review for your story So Much for Happy Endings. Hope you find it informative and helpful!

This review will also be posted on the review exchange on WCFC.

You've been hanging around the forums for a bit but for some reason it didn't click that you were the author of this story. I've been keeping tabs on it so it's about time I did a more comprehensive review of what you've written so far.

I read your note on the Review Exchange and I'll just say the first few chapters aren't THAT bad. If you're worried that the chapters don't flow smoothly that's not an issue. Although timeskips can be annoying if misused, you're choosing to focus on key events in the story and I think that's a good approach because it keeps the reader interested. Granted there are a few holes but more on that later...

One of the things I like about this story is Darcy's characterization and her development as a person. I always thought she was the most reasonable one out of the Trix and that she's reflective and slightly introverted and this really comes out your writing. And the fact she feels alienated and different from her sisters and her family is also what cements the attraction she feels to Valtor and I can see how they can have a compatible relationship because they have similar personalities. Additionally, I like how you've pitched Valtor as the mysterious charismatic wizard with a problematic and troubled history.

That said, Chapter 4 seems to be the best you've written so far because it focuses solely on Darcy and Valtor. I reaaalllly like how you've written their interactions but I would have liked a bit more insight into the development of their...chemistry. I guess that's what you get from chapters jumping from arriving in the Omega Dimension to controlling Cloud Tower. Maybe you could find a way around that to make the readers feel that time has passed and Darcy and Valtor have thus become more familiar with each other?

But I guess this is where I'm going to start pointing out some problematic aspects with this story, besides the general grammatical errors that every writer makes.

Some issues I had with how you've written Darcy is when she reacted upon seeing Valtor for the first time, it felt a bit cheesy especially with the whole "love at first sight" thing. Darcy also felt a bit too whiny until Chapter 4. I could excuse it in the first chapter because she was still a kid. But by the time of Chapter 3 I can't see why Darcy would still be acting nervously and insecurely around her sisters, especially after proving to them that she does have magical powers to be reckoned with when they first entered Cloud Tower. Wouldn't that have given her a bit of confidence?

This leads to how I think there's a bit of an issue between progression of characters and the timeline of the story. Like I said before, timeskipping between chapters isn't a problem, but you still need to convey a sense of development. People don't stay entirely the same after years and months have passed and if big events (like getting banished to the Omega Dimension, etc.) happen, their attitudes towards friends and family would be a different...you get where I'm going with this?

And another thing. I know this fanfic is focusing on Darcy and Valtor but the relationships between other minor characters can also flesh out the world and add meaning to the central plot. This issue really comes out with how Icy and Stormy feel pretty flat as people compared to what you've done for Valtor and Darcy. Even though you can still write them as being stupid b*** I'm pretty sure they would be acting differently to Darcy by the time they are in the Omega and I kind of like to see how they'd react to Darcy and Valtor becoming closer with each other. We'll probably see that in future updates? But my peeve with how you've characterized Icy and Stormy might just be my personal need to have a ridiculously developed world and fleshed-out characters (main and minor). Unless it's a one-shot I don't really like stories that focus on two characters and make everyone else incidental or bent to make the central plot work...

In the end, I'm still legitimately curious about Valtor's backstory and how this is all going to end tragically. Are you going to introduce other characters (like the Winx, etc.) or is it just going to focus on Valtor and Darcy with the other Trix in the background? Either way I hope this has helped you with your writing and keep going, I'm still invested in this story. :D

In case you're wondering working on rewriting some of the chapters of one of my stories (guess which one) to streamline it and make it less convoluted. In the meantime, could someone review my latest one-shot Fear the Flame?

thewanderingoutsider, I reviewed your story Fear The Flame. I wrote:

This review will also be posted on the review exchange.

Wow! This was so dark! I loved it!

Bloom's reasoning was beautiful, in a dark, twisted way. The characterisation of every character was also well done. The descriptions you put in were brilliant. But Icy died. Aww... I like Icy.

Your summary drew me in, it was engaging and made me wonder. The story was well worded, nothing felt out of place. The last sentence was brilliant. The idea of Bloom being a monster really appeals to me.

Overall, a brilliant story. I love it. Well done, outsider.

I know it's short, but I hope it helps. :) Can someone please review my story, The Past is in the Past?

Dear Phoenix,

I have read your story The Past is in the Past. Here are my thoughts:

Aw... that's so sweet. I like little slices of life with the characters. And Musa used to be my favorite. Riven was OOC, but this looks like an AU and all so it makes some measure of sense. You made a few grammar mistakes (when quoting somebody in dialogue, make sure you start with one quote and end with it too. You didn't always remember to end), but none that detracted from the story. All in all, a pretty nice one shot. Sorry my review's kinda short. This is also going on the Review Exchange, by the way.

Can somebody please review my story Stuck in the Shadows? It's the sequel to Out of the Darkness, and after working a few things ut with my partner, we're ready to update again. I'd prefer you review Chapter Four (going up Thursday), but you can review anything that's already there.

Pierce (I keep getting the urge to call you Piercey but that's just creepy so I won't.), I reviewed the first 2 chapters of Stuck in the Shadows in a combined review. This is what I said:

Heya, Pierce! This is my review for the Review Exchange. Sorry I'm not reviewing Chapter 4 like you asked but ya know. It's something at least.

But, anyway. Drunk!Xander was fun to read about. He was sweet (as sweet as a drunk person can get, anyway) I sympathised with him. The Shadow Hunters were mean to him. I liked the tiny little descriptions along the way. Especially in Chapter 1. I loved how Rilei refused to kill the man. I like how much she protested. The man was also brutal. He was horrid to her.

But there were a few mistakes I spotted, like: 'Why did everything had a price attached to it' maybe the 'had' should be 'have'? And also, 'he asked her again, firmer this still refused'. Shouldn't there have been a 'time but she' in between 'this' and 'still'?

Well. That's all I got. Hope I helped. Catch ya later, Pierce. :)

Can someone please review my story, Opposing Fire? It's a Bloom & Baltor friendship fic, done for the Rubik's Cube Challenge.

Phoenox,

I have reviewed your story Opposing Fire. Here are my thoughts:

Wow. For some reason, I thought it was from Bloom's POV at first. I was very shocked to realize "no, this is Baltor". Haha.

Anyway... I'm neutral towards this. On one hand, you have a cool idea and I like the scenario, but on the other, I don't like how you characterized Baltor. I love his manipulative b***!personality. You made him seem genuine this time around. He isn't evil enough for me. Bloom's characterization is okay (I'm not her fan, so it's hard for me to judge), but Baltor's bugs me in a way I can't describe.

In other words, this is a good fic and also not my cup of tea. You'll be seeing this review appear on the exchange, and I can't wait to see you on the far side!

PS: Don't feel pressured to expand on this story. I know a lot of people want you to, but it's your choice.

Since I allow stories from other fandoms (but readers have the choice to recuse or ask for something in Winx fandom), I'd like to request that someone read my Ace Attorney fic Rebirth? It's ten chapters in, so I'd understand if you stopped after Chapter... Three. But of you'd be willing, I would love a review on my latest chapter, which I posted today.

Dear Pierce, I reviewed your story Rebirth.

This is a good one.

So this story's genre is mystery and crime. Generally, from the prologue, I can feel the sensation of mysteriousness. The story itself is quiet heavy. I mean, it's pretty different from my original thought. It doesn't really carry high potential of secrecy. Notwithstanding, the heaviness of the story did it a favor. Heaviness is a good way which leads to mysteriousness. I can sense the mystery and a little bit fear when I read the story. The story is also quite gloomy though. I don't know if it's only my imagination but when I tried to picture the scenes, I saw the darkness everywhere. I have to agree that "Rebirth" is very brilliant, but perhaps it will be even more interesting if you shed some light into it (in some way, darkness actually brings the feeling of confusion, but a sparkle of light won't destroy the feeling, besides, it will make the story become more exciting).

I don't understand much about the characters, but by the way you portrayed them, especially Kay and Trucy. You made me feel like they are more than just friends.

I totally like the part that Kay said "I can't remember which clothes are clean". It is hilarious (but it is one of the very few mirthful scenes in the fic). The part that Trucy asked Kay whether she lived alone also makes me think. Isn't it jealousy?

Overall, it looks like there is still a long journey until this story itself is finished. Wish that you would have it done.

My turn now, can anyone review the story Hexalogy: The Second Truth for me?

Shade, I reviewed your story, Hexalogy: The Second Truth. This is what I said:

I like this introduction. I like the way you described everything. I like the part where you said that evil doesn't like the idea that good is destined to win. The only thing you could have improved on is tense consistency. There were times when you switched from your usual past tense to the present. I know you would've liked me to review chapter 2 but I'll have to work my way through it slowly. This review will appear on the review exchange. Phoenix, over and out.

Can someone please review my story Their Young One Gone? It's a Sherlock story. .