Stars in the Darkness - Part Thirty-Nine
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It was evening at the Jedi Temple. The soft chiming of bells signaled the start of the meditation hour. The bells symbolized not just the onset of contemplation for the members of the Order, but a sense of continuity. They had rang within the Temple for thousands upon thousands of years, inviting countless Jedi down the ages to stop their everyday pursuits and turn within, reflecting quietly on themselves, their place within the universe and, of course, the Force.
As the bells had done all the years Obi-Wan had spent here, first as an initiate, then as a Padawan and finally as a Jedi Knight, they never failed to precipitate a sense of peace within him. He released a long, lingering breath.
He stood alone, his arms folded within his robe, on the observation platform located just outside the Council chamber. He watched as the sun set, the sky a riot of scarlet and platinum, sapphire and violet. Lines of air-traffic moving ceaselessly among the towering skyscrapers turned into jeweled rivers of light against that fiery backdrop.
The last time he and his master had stood here had been while they awaited the Council's decision regarding Anakin's acceptance into the Order. Obi- Wan had chided Qui-Gon, warning him not to defy the Council again. But his master had given him that somewhat self-satisfied look and said, "I will do what I must, Obi-Wan."
Obi-Wan nodded as he recalled those words. And I will do what I must, Master. I hope you will forgive me.
He turned when he heard footsteps coming up behind him. Sinja-Bau, her platinum hair braided and wrapped about her head, walked towards him. He still found it difficult to see her back in her Jedi robes, but she wore them with a strength and dignity that was a far cry from the emaciated, wild-eyed mad woman he'd found on Toola. There was a calm serenity in those blue-green eyes, instead of the feral insanity they'd once possessed, and Obi-Wan, as he had these last few days, took comfort in her gentle presence.
Sinja-Bau moved next to him, standing in the same spot Qui-Gon had stood all those years ago. For a moment, neither spoke as they watched the sun set. Then Sinja-Bau reached over and put her hand on Obi-Wan's where it lay on the balcony railing.
"You're doing the right thing," she said.
"Am I? I should have done as you advised me. I should have recanted my confession."
Sinja-Bau tilted her head and looked up at him. "Why?"
"What?"
"Why should you have done something you did not want to do?"
"Because, if not for my confession, I would not have been expelled from the Order."
"And?" Sinja-Bau prodded him.
"And I would still be a Jedi."
"Is that what you want? To still be a Jedi?"
Obi-Wan looked down into her eyes, then jerked his head away. He gripped the railing so tight his knuckles whitened. Sinja-Bau, feeling the tension in his hand, gently rubbed it.
"I don't know," he said, his throat raw. He looked back at Sinja-Bau. "I can't leave her!"
Sinja-Bau reached up and cupped his face. "I know," she said softly.
"The decision was close," Obi-Wan said. "Six to five with one abstention. I could fight it, challenge it."
"You could."
Sinja-Bau lowered her hand and waited. Obi-Wan released a shuddering breath.
"But I won't," he finally said. "I won't fight it, and I won't recant my confession. Anakin told me he thought I'd gone to Lursan's just to warn him. That's not true. I went to kill him. But, I couldn't. Whoever killed Lursan did what I wanted to do, what I should have done, but couldn't because I was a Jedi." Obi-Wan lowered his head. "When I told Lursan that if he ever touched Onara again I would kill him, I meant it." He raised his head and looked over at her, his blue-gray eyes haunted. "How can I remain a Jedi with such hate in my heart."
"Not hate, Obi-Wan. No, the question is how can you remain a Jedi with such love in your heart. You love Onara, with a love so strong, so powerful, so passionate it has eclipsed everything that once had meaning for you. There is no shame in that. You're actually quite fortunate. Not many find such love, or have it returned."
Obi-Wan shook his head. "Onara hates me."
"And yet you are taking her back to Ahjane, choosing to stay with her."
"Until she comes out of her _yanol_. Dalan is no longer here to care for her while she's in it. I owe her, and him, that much."
"And when she comes out of it you will leave her?"
"She will tell me to go."
"Perhaps. But, what if she doesn't?"
Obi-Wan shook his head again. He could not imagine Onara wanting him near her after what he'd done.
"You must stop blaming yourself for what happened with Ben."
"I can't," Obi-Wan said, his heart swelling with pain.
"You made the only choice you could based on who you are and what you were trained to be."
"He was my son! I should have given up anything, everything, to save him."
Sinja-Bau grabbed Obi-Wan's arms and turned him towards her. She shook him gently.
"Listen to me, Obi-Wan, and think. You were taken as a baby from your family, brought to the Temple and told, from the moment you arrived, that the dark side of the Force is the path to damnation. It was fed to you along with your food, taught to you along with your lessons. How many times did you hear, did I hear, that once a Jedi starts down the dark path forever will it dominate his destiny?
"Therefore, when confronted, at that most horrendous of moments, with a decision I do not envy your gentle soul having to face, you acted instinctively. Ben, bless his poor sweet spirit, had only been in your life for a short time. The Jedi Order had been in your life for all of it. You made the only decision you could based on what you had been trained from infancy by the Order to do. Not to turn to the dark side."
"But he was my son," Obi-Wan whispered, understanding what Sinja-Bau was trying to tell him, but not wanting to.
"Yes, he was. But he's gone now, Obi-Wan. You're still here, and so is Onara. You can't go on punishing yourself for something that was not your fault. Did you have a choice about being a Jedi? A real choice?" Sinja-Bau shook her head. "Most of us did not. You were tested and the Jedi Order made an offer to your parents to train you. They accepted and handed you over. You had nothing to say about it."
"But I wanted to be a Jedi when I became aware of where I was, who I was. I trained hard to be one."
"Of course you did, but, who knows what else you might have been if you had truly been given a choice."
Obi-Wan slowly nodded. Yes, what might he have been. A husband and a father perhaps? Sinja-Bau released his arms and gazed solemnly up at him.
"Now you have a choice, Obi-Wan. You can choose to stay and fight the Council's decision to expel you or you can take another path. But, I do know this. Your love for Onara will never die. Therefore, if you choose to try and stay within the Order, you will tear yourself apart wanting to be with her, yet also wanting to remain a Jedi."
"But, what of my promise to Qui-Gon? To train Anakin?"
Sinja-Bau sighed heavily. "Obi-Wan, I admired and respected Qui-Gon. Very much so. But he could be quite myopic when it came to his beliefs. The concerns and needs of others did not often factor into his decisions. With his dying breath he bound you to a fate that, again, was not of your choosing. Not all Jedi take on apprentices. Perhaps, if you had not made that promise to train Anakin you might have taken another path."
She took his arm and gripped it hard. "You've given ten years of your life to Qui-Gon's last directive, Obi-Wan. Anakin is no longer a child. He's a man now, and he has his own destiny to fulfill. It's time for you to finally choose a life for yourself. Not the life the Order laid out for you the moment you were placed as a baby into their hands, nor the one Qui-Gon bound you to with his dying breath, but a life you choose willingly."
Obi-Wan stared at Sinja-Bau for a long moment. He gently took her hand. "Then I choose Onara."
Sinja-Bau smiled and, reaching up, kissed his cheek. "And don't grieve yet, Obi-Wan. There is still always hope. Onara loved Ben with all her heart, but this I know. She loved you just as much."
Obi-Wan put his arms around Sinja-Bau and hugged her tight, his heart beating hard. He had chosen, and, for the first time in his life, the path he now followed was truly his own.
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Anakin Skywalker closed his eyes for a moment as he stood in the dank Coruscant night. Having grown up on a desert planet, even after all the years he'd been away from Tatooine, the atmospheres of most planets still felt too damp too him. He looked around. He was outside the Temple, a few kilometers from it. The street he was standing on was of no particular importance, had no significance to him whatsoever.
He had pulled the name of it, Jerrah Street, out of his mind when he had told Obi-Wan he had wanted to say goodbye to him away from the Temple. He had walked down this street countless times on his way to and from the Temple. Like many such streets there were shops, bistros, and places of trade and commerce; restaurants where he'd stopped to buy something to eat, shops he had been drawn to look at some object in their holographic windows.
Tonight, the street was mostly empty since many of the shops depended on the commerce of those who worked in the office buildings surrounding it. But all the workers had gone home for the evening. The only places still open were a couple of late-night bistros, catering to those who, for whatever reason, did not wish to eat at home.
Anakin could smell roasting tarl meat, baked red potatoes and the sweet smell of yarkel tortes. But he was not hungry. He was waiting. Waiting to say goodbye to the man who had been his master for the past ten years, but was now no longer. He adjusted the package he was holding under his arm, securing it against his side. Then he sighed.
He had a new master now. Jedi Master Chereg Nygee. Nygee was a Nehaun. The Nehaun were hairless humanoids, tall and thin with pale yellow eyes and dark green skin. Nehaun society was very conservative and tradition bound, and Master Nygee was no exception. He believed strongly in a very strict adherence to the Jedi Code.
Anakin had spent only a few minutes with Master Nygee, but he already didn't like him. Nygee had started out their meeting commenting on Anakin's attire. Noting that Anakin wore a synthetic leather surcoat instead of the traditional cloth one, and that his dark clothing made him stand out among his fellow Jedi, it had taken all of Anakin's willpower to remain silent, as was expected of a dutiful Padawan. But he could already see trouble ahead for him and Master Nygee.
Anakin angrily scuffed the toe of his boot against the pavement. What was the Council thinking in assigning him to such a person? Then he stood straighter. Obi-Wan was walking towards him. Anakin swallowed, his throat tight. His master was no longer in his Jedi robe or clothes. He now wore a simple tunic, pants and a jacket. Anakin had been startled the first time he had seen Obi-Wan at the hospital the other day in Dalan's clothes. Now, he was heartbroken to see him dressed like any other man.
"Anakin," Obi-Wan said smiling as he drew closer. "Have you been waiting long?"
Anakin shook his head. He saw Obi-Wan was carrying a medium-sized travel case. After the official ceremony expelling him from the Order, which Anakin had refused to attend, Obi-Wan had been given enough time to pack what personal belongings he wanted to take with him.
He stopped in front of Anakin and peered up at him. "Have you eaten? Are you hungry?"
"No, Master. I mean..." He stopped, embarrassed. What was he supposed to call Obi-Wan now?
"Why don't we go somewhere and sit down. I'm not hungry myself, but I could use a cup of something warm."
Anakin nodded and followed Obi-Wan to one of the bistros. It was mostly empty, so the droid waiter immediately took them to a table. Obi-Wan ordered Ventolin Tea, and, at Obi-Wan's insistence, Anakin asked the droid to bring him a glass of blue milk. He didn't really want it, but it was the first thing that popped in his head.
Once their drinks arrived, Anakin took a sip of his and was instantly transported back to his childhood. His mother had made him drink the nutrient-rich beverage for as long as he could remember. Obi-Wan sipped his tea, his luminous eyes on Anakin.
"Anakin," he began, but Anakin quickly shook his head.
"No, Master. Please, you don't have to say anything. I want you to go."
"You do?"
Anakin swallowed hard, keeping his eyes on Obi-Wan, hoping he couldn't see he was lying. He didn't want him to go. Not at all. But, he also knew what it was like to love someone, to want to be with her, to spend your every waking moment thinking of her, longing for her presence, yearning for her touch. Oh, yes, he knew.
"Onara needs you," he said. "She's alone now. And you love her, Master. You've loved her since the night of the blessing ceremony. I've seen the look in your eyes, heard the sound in your voice whenever you saw her or spoke of her. She's in your soul, Master. Don't deny it."
Obi-Wan gripped his cup. Then he nodded. "Yes, Anakin. She is. But, I don't want you to think that because I've chosen this path it is in any way a reflection on you. I've been very proud to be your master these last ten years. And I've been very proud of you."
Anakin blinked, for his vision had suddenly grown misty. Once Obi-Wan's face was in focus again, he let himself speak.
"I know, Master. And I've been honored, greatly honored, to have had you as my master." Then Anakin cursed himself, for his voice had begun to shake.
Obi-Wan reached over and put his hand over his. "Master Nygee is a good Jedi. All of the padawans he's trained have gone on to become great Knights. You will too. I know you will."
Anakin lifted his head. "If I do, it will only be because of your tutelage, Master. Not his."
Obi-Wan smiled and squeezed his hand. Then he sat back, drawing his hand away. He picked up his cup and took another sip of his tea.
"When do you leave?" Anakin asked.
"In the morning," Obi-Wan answered, his blue-gray eyes watching Anakin carefully. "The Ahjane government has sent a star-yacht, equipped with a medical bay, to transport Onara and..." Obi-Wan stopped and lowered his cup. "Dalan and Ben."
Anakin looked down at the table. He still found it hard to believe they were dead. So much had changed in such a short time. So much.
"Keria is remaining on Coruscant," Obi-Wan remarked.
Anakin looked up at him, startled. "She is?"
Obi-Wan nodded. "She's going to marry that young man of hers. The red- haired lad she met at Senator Rhygdon's party." Then he laughed softly, a somewhat embarrassed laugh. "She asked my permission to do so, after securing her parent's consent, of course. It seems, until Onara recovers, I've become some sort of de facto head of the household. Or at least in the eyes of people like Keria and Simtro."
"Simtro?" Anakin remembered him. He had been Dynast K'lia's majordomo.
"Yes, I've been in contact with him, making arrangements for Onara's return. And for the funerals." Obi-Wan stopped, his face twisting briefly with pain. "In addition," he went on, "he's asked my advice on a number of things regarding Onara and Dalan's affairs. With all that's happened, much needs to be decided regarding their joint provinces. I've advised him as best as I could."
"Onara will be grateful for it once she recovers."
Obi-Wan said nothing and Anakin knew he still expected her to hate him once she came out of her _yanol_.
"Sinja-Bau told me that Auna and Zaka are going with you, Master."
Obi-Wan's eyes lit up, and it warmed Anakin's heart to see it. "Yes, it appeared they've taken it upon themselves to become my bodyguards and nursemaids." His lips crinkled into a wry smile.
Anakin returned his smile. "I like them. Especially Auna. She's a riot. I don't think the Temple has yet recovered from her visit."
"I like them too, and though I did not ask them to do so, I'm glad they're coming with me."
Anakin nodded. Then he remembered. He took the package he'd brought with him off his lap and put it on the table, pushing it slowly over to Obi-Wan.
Obi-Wan stared down at it, his face awash with surprise. "You were able to get it all?"
"Yes, Master. Everything you need is there."
Obi-Wan laid his hands on the package, then he looked over at Anakin, his eyes brimming with gratitude. "Thank you, Padawan. Thank you so much."
"You're welcome, Master." Anakin twisted his hands on the table. This was so hard. Then he felt Obi-Wan's hands on his.
"I'm going to miss you too, Anakin. So very, very much."
"I know, Master. But, you're doing the right thing. You really are. I don't believe Onara is going to hate you when she finally recovers. She still loves you. I know she does, and she's going to need you, just as much as you need her."
Again, Obi-Wan said nothing. He drew his hands away and, taking the package, put it inside his travel case. Anakin glanced at the chrono on the wall of the bistro. He had to get back to the Temple. Obi-Wan followed his glance, then looked over at Anakin. The two rose from the table, then Obi- Wan reached over and drew Anakin into his arms, holding him tightly.
"Goodbye, Anakin. May the Force be with you."
"And with you, Master," Anakin replied, willing his tears not to fall, but unable to keep them from doing so.
Obi-Wan held him for a long moment then, pulling quickly away, his face averted, he picked up his travel case and hurriedly left the bistro. Anakin stood for a moment, staring down at the floor where Obi-Wan had stood. Then, his head bowed, his black cape flowing like darkness behind him, he returned to the Jedi Temple.
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Dooku fell to one knee before Sidious. He grimaced. He was not as young as he used to be. All this genuflecting was affecting his joints. But, Sidious expected it, and what Lord Sidious expected, Lord Sidious got. If not, one paid the consequences, which were never pleasant.
"Rise, my apprentice," Sidious intoned.
Dooku did so, gratefully. He adjusted his cloak about his long frame. Then he looked over to where Sidious sat on his black metal throne. For that's what it was. It also resembled, somewhat, the chair in Chancellor Palpatine's office.
"You have done well," Sidious went on.
"Thank you, Master."
"Kenobi has been expelled from the Jedi Order. An unforeseen event, but not an unwelcome one."
"Indeed, my Master."
Sidious leaned closer, but the upper half of his face was still hidden by his black cowl, only his thin lips visible. "I still find it somewhat troubling, however, that you chose to kill Lursan without consulting me first."
Dooku straightened his shoulders. He had expected this. "I understand, Master."
"I'm not sure I approve of such initiative."
"Lursan was becoming a liability. His reckless and brutal murder of Senator Gillom proved that. We had no further use for him."
"So you went to his penthouse to wait for his return."
"Yes, Master."
"But, before you could kill him, Master Kenobi showed up."
Dooku nodded.
Sidious tilted his head. "You could have killed them both."
"I saw no reason to kill Obi-Wan at that moment."
"You did not? Interesting. I wonder, Lord Tyrannus, if your feelings are quite clear regarding our plans."
"They are, my Master. I just do not believe in killing for no reason."
Sidious said nothing for a long moment. "Obi-Wan is still in possession of his Jedi powers."
"The Council saw fit not to strip them from him."
"Interesting," Sidious observed. "Considering that Master Kenobi confessed to such a cold-blooded killing, you would think the Council considered him a great danger."
"We both know he confessed to something he did not do. Perhaps the Council knew it as well and, therefore, knew he was no real threat."
"Yet they expelled him away."
Dooku moved closer. "There are many on the Council and still more within the Jedi Order who sense the growing power of the dark side. The passions Obi-Wan had for his son and still has for his woman is something many of them do not understand. And what they do not understand frightens them. Frightened people do not act rationally. Even if they are Jedi."
Sidious nodded. "Fear leads to anger."
"Anger leads to hate," Dooku responded automatically.
"And hate leads to the dark side," Sidious finished, cackling loudly.
Dooku smiled thinly.
"This Jedi, Master Nygee," Sidious said, once he'd stopped laughing "The one Skywalker has been assigned to. Do you know him?"
Dooku nodded. "Nygee is a very powerful Jedi. He's also a strict constructionist when it comes to the Jedi Code. I've even heard it said he has openly criticized Obi-Wan and his behavior since meeting Senator Lenor."
"Really? Skywalker will not like that." Sidious then grinned his death- heads smile.
"No, he will not. He will chafe under Nygee's tutelage. Their master/apprentice relationship will be a stormy one."
"Surely the Council knows this," Sidious said. "If so, why would they assign him to such a Jedi?"
"Because they fear Anakin. They believe he's the Chosen One, but they are also troubled by him. He's arrogant, rash, but very powerful. They think Nygee will keep him in line since he's so strict."
Sidious chuckled. He knew, as well as Dooku, that the Council had made a critical error assigning Skywalker to Nygee. An error that, in the long run, could also prove quite deadly.
Leaning back, Sidious pursed his lips. "Kenobi is on his way to Ahjane with that comatose woman of his. For now, he is of no more concern to us. But, we shall also keep an eye on him." Sidious placed his hands on the arms of his black throne. "Now it is time to focus on our plans for our Grand Design. You may commence with the latest report from Kamino on the clone production schedule."
Dooku rattled off the numbers, but a part of his mind was still on Obi-Wan. He may have willingly put himself into a position to be expelled from the Jedi Order so he could be with the woman he loved, but he was still a Jedi. He would always be a Jedi. Therefore, he could still be a danger to his and his master's plans. Yes, it would be wise to keep an eye on Obi-Wan.
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Yoda sat in his chair in the Council chamber. All of the chairs had been removed but his. But he was not alone. Mace Windu stood, tall and silent, looking out the large windows at the night skyline of Coruscant.
"Some rest you should get," Yoda said.
Mace turned and looked at him. The lights were low in the chamber, so all Yoda could see were the Jedi Master's dark eyes staring piercingly at him.
"Rest?" Mace scoffed softly. He turned back to the window. "How can one rest on a night such as this."
"Like you, miss him already I do."
Mace folded his arms across his chest. "It need not have come to this."
"No, it need not," Yoda agreed.
"But it has."
Yoda nodded, but said nothing. Mace released a deep heavy breath. He walked over and stood in front of Yoda.
"You let him keep his lightsaber, even though it is forbidden for a Jedi to do so once expelled from the Order." Mace's dark eyes narrowed. "Will he return to us? Have you seen it?"
"Yes."
"Yes? That's all. Not when, not why. Just yes."
Yoda nodded, then averted his gaze from Windu and looked down at the floor.
Mace knelt in front of Yoda, his face centimeters from the ancient Jedi's.
"I did as you asked," he suddenly cried, his voice raw with emotion. "I voted for his expulsion. Now he's gone."
Mace glared at Yoda as he remained silent, then stood. "You're wrong, you know. He's not coming back. Why should he? He believes we betrayed him, that the Force betrayed him."
Yoda raised his head and looked up at the taller Jedi, his leaf-green eyes boring into Mace's darker ones, but he remained silent.
Mace returned Yoda's stare, then shook his head. "I hope you know what you're doing. I truly do. The dark times are coming. We will need him."
Yoda pointed a gnarled finger at Windu. "And be there he will. When darkness covers us all, be there he will."
Mace stared at Yoda a moment longer, his gaze unreadable. Then he turned, his robe sweeping behind him, and left the Council chamber.
Once he was gone, Yoda released the breath he'd been holding. He looked out the window at the night sky, and saw, glimmering in the dark heavens, the stars. Stars in the darkness. Yoda slowly closed his eyes and lost himself within the flowing interstices of the Force.
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Obi-Wan gently stroked Onara's hair. They were on their way to Ahjane, the star-yacht speeding through hyperspace. She was still in her _yanol_, but her physical injuries had healed. He glanced over and checked the machines she was hooked up to. The readouts all read normal.
He sat back in the chair next to her bed. The medical bay of the star-yacht was state of the art. He knew there was nothing to worry about, but his sense of disquiet had not eased. There was no more danger, he told himself. Lursan was dead. But, so was Ben and Dalan. Their bodies were down in the ship's hold in stasis. Obi-Wan closed his eyes, the wave of pain that always accompanied thoughts of Ben sweeping through him. A moan escaped his lips.
"Master Kenobi, are ya all right?"
Obi-Wan opened his eyes. Auna was standing in the doorway of the medical bay. Her large violet eyes were staring worriedly at him.
"Auna," Obi-Wan said. "Please, come in."
Auna walked into the room, looking over at Onara. She leaned over, examining her carefully, as she did every time she came to see her. "Do ya think she can hear us, Master Kenobi?"
"I don't know. I don't think so."
Auna stared down at Onara a moment longer, then looked over at Obi-Wan.
"Thinking about yar wee one, weren't ya?"
Obi-Wan nodded, his throat tight. Auna walked over to him and put one of her four hands on his shoulder, pressing it gently.
"Ya should let yarself cry, Master Kenobi. It don't do no good to hold it in."
"I'm all right, Auna. Really I am." He reached over and patted her hand. She nodded and stepped away.
"So, ya did it," she said, her head tilted, her pointed ears twitching.
"What? Did what?"
"Remember that time I asked ya if ya would kill to protect yar wee one and yar lady love. Ya did it."
Obi-Wan nodded. Auna and Zaka still thought he had killed Lursan. He saw no reason to dispute their conclusions. In their eyes he had done the right thing. It no longer mattered to Obi-Wan what people believed or did not believe, what they thought was right or was wrong about Lursan's death. If Obi-Wan had been more of a man and less of a Jedi, Lursan would surely have died at his hands.
He shook his head. "But too late to protect Ben," he whispered.
Auna suddenly fell to her knees, startling Obi-Wan. She put two of her hands on his legs and gazed up at him. He looked down at her. She was rough and she was tough, but she was also quite beautiful.
"Don't," she said softly. "Don't do this to yarself. Yar wee one is gone. But ya are still alive and yar lady love is still alive. The two of ya together made Ben. The two of ya together can make another child."
Obi-Wan shook his head. He reached down and cupped Auna's face. "No, Auna. There will be no more children. I will care for Onara until she recovers and then I will leave."
"What if she asks ya to stay?"
Obi-Wan looked over at Onara, her dark hair spilling across the pillows, her eyes closed as she remained locked in her grief unending. "She will not."
Auna stared up at Obi-Wan as he gazed sadly over at Onara. Then she stood. Obi-Wan looked up at her.
"Well, if that be so, what will ya do? Where will ya go?"
"I don't know. Is there much work out in the galaxy for an ex-Jedi?"
Auna shrugged. "Could be. Me and Zaka, we've been freelancing. Doing jobs here and there. Ya could always hook up with us. Yar good in a fight. We could use ya."
Obi-Wan smiled. "Thank you, Auna. I'll keep that in mind."
Auna looked down at him for a moment, then over at Onara, her lovely face thoughtful. "Well, I'll be saying good night to ya, Master Kenobi. And thanks for getting me a separate cabin. The ship we took to Coruscant, Zaka snored all the way."
"You're welcome. Sleep well. I'll see you both in the morning."
Auna nodded, then, leaning down quickly kissed him on the cheek. She blushed as she rose, then turned and left the med-bay. Obi-Wan sat for a moment. Then he walked over and picked up his travel case. He had yet to take it to his cabin. Once on board he had come straight to the med-bay to be with Onara. He opened it.
Inside were the few personal things he had elected to bring with him: the river stone Qui-Gon had given him on his thirteenth birthday; holopictures of him and Qui-Gon, of him and Bant, and of him and Anakin; a book Sinja- Bau had given upon his departure called _The Classic of Peace and Balance_; the pendant which contained the holographic image of Onara and Ben; the framed picture Ben had drawn for him, his lightsaber, which Yoda had allowed him to keep, and, last of all, the package Anakin had given him.
He took out the package and placed it on a table next to Onara's bed. He opened it carefully. Yes, it was as Anakin had said. Everything was here. He glanced over at Onara, making sure she was all right. Then, sitting down at the table, he took out the tiny, delicate instruments, the metal plating, the magnetic stabilizing ring, the inert power insulator, the cycling field energizers and all the other parts, and, most importantly, the two tiny crystals, one a primary, the other a focusing one. Everything he would need to construct a small lightsaber. Small enough for a child to hold.
But, there was one last thing. In order to construct the lightsaber he had promised Ben, the one he planned to bury with his son, he would have to call on the Force, because only it could guide him as he made the impossibly fine and crucial alignments of the irregular crystals.
Obi-Wan closed his eyes. The Force had betrayed him. It had taken away his son and broken the heart of his love, but only the Force could help him fulfill his promise to Ben. Releasing a deep breath, he opened himself to it, and it rushed into him, like a river that had long been banked. It poured into him, energizing, powerful, strong, and, for a moment, he mourned what he had lost now that he was no longer a Jedi, but when he opened his eyes and looked over at Onara, he let go of his regret.
He focused on his task, his fingers moving surely and skillfully, the Force flowing through him. Soon the lightsaber that began to form between his hands was a small, exact replica of his own. He worked far into the night. Then, finally, as he heard the ship dropping out of hyperspace and making its approach into the Ahjane system, he was done.
Obi-Wan held the tiny lightsaber in his hands, his fingers moving slowly over it. Then he looked up, noting light streaming in from the port window of the med-bay. He placed the lightsaber carefully on the table and walked over to the window. It was the Ahjane sun. The window automatically darkened as it shielded, blocking out harmful UV rays and radiation, but Obi-Wan imagined he could feel the sun's warmth on his face. He gazed out the window, watching as Ahjane came into view, a large blue and green planet. He turned and smiled at Onara.
"You're home, love. You're home."
Onara, of course, remained in her _yanol_, oblivious to him. Obi-Wan turned back to the window, sighing deeply. Then he watched as Ahjane grew larger, the sun's light arcing over its circumference. There was no night or day in space. It was an illusion of a planet's rotation as it orbited about its sun. But to Obi-Wan, as he watched the sun rising over the rim of Ahjane, it felt to him like a new day. The first day of his new life.
The End
That's it, folks, the ending to "Stars in the Darkness". :) First of all, thanks to all of you who went the distance with this fic. I hope you've enjoyed this fic as much as I have writing it. And, yes, I have left a lot up in the air. It's not quite the happy ending, I promised, but there's a lot more story to tell. It looks like this is going to be a trilogy, so the next fic, which I have tentatively titled, "In Love and War" will be up, I hope, soon. Again, thanks so much for reading, for replying and for supporting this fic. It's made my journey writing it a joy. :)
Arwyn Whitesun
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It was evening at the Jedi Temple. The soft chiming of bells signaled the start of the meditation hour. The bells symbolized not just the onset of contemplation for the members of the Order, but a sense of continuity. They had rang within the Temple for thousands upon thousands of years, inviting countless Jedi down the ages to stop their everyday pursuits and turn within, reflecting quietly on themselves, their place within the universe and, of course, the Force.
As the bells had done all the years Obi-Wan had spent here, first as an initiate, then as a Padawan and finally as a Jedi Knight, they never failed to precipitate a sense of peace within him. He released a long, lingering breath.
He stood alone, his arms folded within his robe, on the observation platform located just outside the Council chamber. He watched as the sun set, the sky a riot of scarlet and platinum, sapphire and violet. Lines of air-traffic moving ceaselessly among the towering skyscrapers turned into jeweled rivers of light against that fiery backdrop.
The last time he and his master had stood here had been while they awaited the Council's decision regarding Anakin's acceptance into the Order. Obi- Wan had chided Qui-Gon, warning him not to defy the Council again. But his master had given him that somewhat self-satisfied look and said, "I will do what I must, Obi-Wan."
Obi-Wan nodded as he recalled those words. And I will do what I must, Master. I hope you will forgive me.
He turned when he heard footsteps coming up behind him. Sinja-Bau, her platinum hair braided and wrapped about her head, walked towards him. He still found it difficult to see her back in her Jedi robes, but she wore them with a strength and dignity that was a far cry from the emaciated, wild-eyed mad woman he'd found on Toola. There was a calm serenity in those blue-green eyes, instead of the feral insanity they'd once possessed, and Obi-Wan, as he had these last few days, took comfort in her gentle presence.
Sinja-Bau moved next to him, standing in the same spot Qui-Gon had stood all those years ago. For a moment, neither spoke as they watched the sun set. Then Sinja-Bau reached over and put her hand on Obi-Wan's where it lay on the balcony railing.
"You're doing the right thing," she said.
"Am I? I should have done as you advised me. I should have recanted my confession."
Sinja-Bau tilted her head and looked up at him. "Why?"
"What?"
"Why should you have done something you did not want to do?"
"Because, if not for my confession, I would not have been expelled from the Order."
"And?" Sinja-Bau prodded him.
"And I would still be a Jedi."
"Is that what you want? To still be a Jedi?"
Obi-Wan looked down into her eyes, then jerked his head away. He gripped the railing so tight his knuckles whitened. Sinja-Bau, feeling the tension in his hand, gently rubbed it.
"I don't know," he said, his throat raw. He looked back at Sinja-Bau. "I can't leave her!"
Sinja-Bau reached up and cupped his face. "I know," she said softly.
"The decision was close," Obi-Wan said. "Six to five with one abstention. I could fight it, challenge it."
"You could."
Sinja-Bau lowered her hand and waited. Obi-Wan released a shuddering breath.
"But I won't," he finally said. "I won't fight it, and I won't recant my confession. Anakin told me he thought I'd gone to Lursan's just to warn him. That's not true. I went to kill him. But, I couldn't. Whoever killed Lursan did what I wanted to do, what I should have done, but couldn't because I was a Jedi." Obi-Wan lowered his head. "When I told Lursan that if he ever touched Onara again I would kill him, I meant it." He raised his head and looked over at her, his blue-gray eyes haunted. "How can I remain a Jedi with such hate in my heart."
"Not hate, Obi-Wan. No, the question is how can you remain a Jedi with such love in your heart. You love Onara, with a love so strong, so powerful, so passionate it has eclipsed everything that once had meaning for you. There is no shame in that. You're actually quite fortunate. Not many find such love, or have it returned."
Obi-Wan shook his head. "Onara hates me."
"And yet you are taking her back to Ahjane, choosing to stay with her."
"Until she comes out of her _yanol_. Dalan is no longer here to care for her while she's in it. I owe her, and him, that much."
"And when she comes out of it you will leave her?"
"She will tell me to go."
"Perhaps. But, what if she doesn't?"
Obi-Wan shook his head again. He could not imagine Onara wanting him near her after what he'd done.
"You must stop blaming yourself for what happened with Ben."
"I can't," Obi-Wan said, his heart swelling with pain.
"You made the only choice you could based on who you are and what you were trained to be."
"He was my son! I should have given up anything, everything, to save him."
Sinja-Bau grabbed Obi-Wan's arms and turned him towards her. She shook him gently.
"Listen to me, Obi-Wan, and think. You were taken as a baby from your family, brought to the Temple and told, from the moment you arrived, that the dark side of the Force is the path to damnation. It was fed to you along with your food, taught to you along with your lessons. How many times did you hear, did I hear, that once a Jedi starts down the dark path forever will it dominate his destiny?
"Therefore, when confronted, at that most horrendous of moments, with a decision I do not envy your gentle soul having to face, you acted instinctively. Ben, bless his poor sweet spirit, had only been in your life for a short time. The Jedi Order had been in your life for all of it. You made the only decision you could based on what you had been trained from infancy by the Order to do. Not to turn to the dark side."
"But he was my son," Obi-Wan whispered, understanding what Sinja-Bau was trying to tell him, but not wanting to.
"Yes, he was. But he's gone now, Obi-Wan. You're still here, and so is Onara. You can't go on punishing yourself for something that was not your fault. Did you have a choice about being a Jedi? A real choice?" Sinja-Bau shook her head. "Most of us did not. You were tested and the Jedi Order made an offer to your parents to train you. They accepted and handed you over. You had nothing to say about it."
"But I wanted to be a Jedi when I became aware of where I was, who I was. I trained hard to be one."
"Of course you did, but, who knows what else you might have been if you had truly been given a choice."
Obi-Wan slowly nodded. Yes, what might he have been. A husband and a father perhaps? Sinja-Bau released his arms and gazed solemnly up at him.
"Now you have a choice, Obi-Wan. You can choose to stay and fight the Council's decision to expel you or you can take another path. But, I do know this. Your love for Onara will never die. Therefore, if you choose to try and stay within the Order, you will tear yourself apart wanting to be with her, yet also wanting to remain a Jedi."
"But, what of my promise to Qui-Gon? To train Anakin?"
Sinja-Bau sighed heavily. "Obi-Wan, I admired and respected Qui-Gon. Very much so. But he could be quite myopic when it came to his beliefs. The concerns and needs of others did not often factor into his decisions. With his dying breath he bound you to a fate that, again, was not of your choosing. Not all Jedi take on apprentices. Perhaps, if you had not made that promise to train Anakin you might have taken another path."
She took his arm and gripped it hard. "You've given ten years of your life to Qui-Gon's last directive, Obi-Wan. Anakin is no longer a child. He's a man now, and he has his own destiny to fulfill. It's time for you to finally choose a life for yourself. Not the life the Order laid out for you the moment you were placed as a baby into their hands, nor the one Qui-Gon bound you to with his dying breath, but a life you choose willingly."
Obi-Wan stared at Sinja-Bau for a long moment. He gently took her hand. "Then I choose Onara."
Sinja-Bau smiled and, reaching up, kissed his cheek. "And don't grieve yet, Obi-Wan. There is still always hope. Onara loved Ben with all her heart, but this I know. She loved you just as much."
Obi-Wan put his arms around Sinja-Bau and hugged her tight, his heart beating hard. He had chosen, and, for the first time in his life, the path he now followed was truly his own.
-----------
Anakin Skywalker closed his eyes for a moment as he stood in the dank Coruscant night. Having grown up on a desert planet, even after all the years he'd been away from Tatooine, the atmospheres of most planets still felt too damp too him. He looked around. He was outside the Temple, a few kilometers from it. The street he was standing on was of no particular importance, had no significance to him whatsoever.
He had pulled the name of it, Jerrah Street, out of his mind when he had told Obi-Wan he had wanted to say goodbye to him away from the Temple. He had walked down this street countless times on his way to and from the Temple. Like many such streets there were shops, bistros, and places of trade and commerce; restaurants where he'd stopped to buy something to eat, shops he had been drawn to look at some object in their holographic windows.
Tonight, the street was mostly empty since many of the shops depended on the commerce of those who worked in the office buildings surrounding it. But all the workers had gone home for the evening. The only places still open were a couple of late-night bistros, catering to those who, for whatever reason, did not wish to eat at home.
Anakin could smell roasting tarl meat, baked red potatoes and the sweet smell of yarkel tortes. But he was not hungry. He was waiting. Waiting to say goodbye to the man who had been his master for the past ten years, but was now no longer. He adjusted the package he was holding under his arm, securing it against his side. Then he sighed.
He had a new master now. Jedi Master Chereg Nygee. Nygee was a Nehaun. The Nehaun were hairless humanoids, tall and thin with pale yellow eyes and dark green skin. Nehaun society was very conservative and tradition bound, and Master Nygee was no exception. He believed strongly in a very strict adherence to the Jedi Code.
Anakin had spent only a few minutes with Master Nygee, but he already didn't like him. Nygee had started out their meeting commenting on Anakin's attire. Noting that Anakin wore a synthetic leather surcoat instead of the traditional cloth one, and that his dark clothing made him stand out among his fellow Jedi, it had taken all of Anakin's willpower to remain silent, as was expected of a dutiful Padawan. But he could already see trouble ahead for him and Master Nygee.
Anakin angrily scuffed the toe of his boot against the pavement. What was the Council thinking in assigning him to such a person? Then he stood straighter. Obi-Wan was walking towards him. Anakin swallowed, his throat tight. His master was no longer in his Jedi robe or clothes. He now wore a simple tunic, pants and a jacket. Anakin had been startled the first time he had seen Obi-Wan at the hospital the other day in Dalan's clothes. Now, he was heartbroken to see him dressed like any other man.
"Anakin," Obi-Wan said smiling as he drew closer. "Have you been waiting long?"
Anakin shook his head. He saw Obi-Wan was carrying a medium-sized travel case. After the official ceremony expelling him from the Order, which Anakin had refused to attend, Obi-Wan had been given enough time to pack what personal belongings he wanted to take with him.
He stopped in front of Anakin and peered up at him. "Have you eaten? Are you hungry?"
"No, Master. I mean..." He stopped, embarrassed. What was he supposed to call Obi-Wan now?
"Why don't we go somewhere and sit down. I'm not hungry myself, but I could use a cup of something warm."
Anakin nodded and followed Obi-Wan to one of the bistros. It was mostly empty, so the droid waiter immediately took them to a table. Obi-Wan ordered Ventolin Tea, and, at Obi-Wan's insistence, Anakin asked the droid to bring him a glass of blue milk. He didn't really want it, but it was the first thing that popped in his head.
Once their drinks arrived, Anakin took a sip of his and was instantly transported back to his childhood. His mother had made him drink the nutrient-rich beverage for as long as he could remember. Obi-Wan sipped his tea, his luminous eyes on Anakin.
"Anakin," he began, but Anakin quickly shook his head.
"No, Master. Please, you don't have to say anything. I want you to go."
"You do?"
Anakin swallowed hard, keeping his eyes on Obi-Wan, hoping he couldn't see he was lying. He didn't want him to go. Not at all. But, he also knew what it was like to love someone, to want to be with her, to spend your every waking moment thinking of her, longing for her presence, yearning for her touch. Oh, yes, he knew.
"Onara needs you," he said. "She's alone now. And you love her, Master. You've loved her since the night of the blessing ceremony. I've seen the look in your eyes, heard the sound in your voice whenever you saw her or spoke of her. She's in your soul, Master. Don't deny it."
Obi-Wan gripped his cup. Then he nodded. "Yes, Anakin. She is. But, I don't want you to think that because I've chosen this path it is in any way a reflection on you. I've been very proud to be your master these last ten years. And I've been very proud of you."
Anakin blinked, for his vision had suddenly grown misty. Once Obi-Wan's face was in focus again, he let himself speak.
"I know, Master. And I've been honored, greatly honored, to have had you as my master." Then Anakin cursed himself, for his voice had begun to shake.
Obi-Wan reached over and put his hand over his. "Master Nygee is a good Jedi. All of the padawans he's trained have gone on to become great Knights. You will too. I know you will."
Anakin lifted his head. "If I do, it will only be because of your tutelage, Master. Not his."
Obi-Wan smiled and squeezed his hand. Then he sat back, drawing his hand away. He picked up his cup and took another sip of his tea.
"When do you leave?" Anakin asked.
"In the morning," Obi-Wan answered, his blue-gray eyes watching Anakin carefully. "The Ahjane government has sent a star-yacht, equipped with a medical bay, to transport Onara and..." Obi-Wan stopped and lowered his cup. "Dalan and Ben."
Anakin looked down at the table. He still found it hard to believe they were dead. So much had changed in such a short time. So much.
"Keria is remaining on Coruscant," Obi-Wan remarked.
Anakin looked up at him, startled. "She is?"
Obi-Wan nodded. "She's going to marry that young man of hers. The red- haired lad she met at Senator Rhygdon's party." Then he laughed softly, a somewhat embarrassed laugh. "She asked my permission to do so, after securing her parent's consent, of course. It seems, until Onara recovers, I've become some sort of de facto head of the household. Or at least in the eyes of people like Keria and Simtro."
"Simtro?" Anakin remembered him. He had been Dynast K'lia's majordomo.
"Yes, I've been in contact with him, making arrangements for Onara's return. And for the funerals." Obi-Wan stopped, his face twisting briefly with pain. "In addition," he went on, "he's asked my advice on a number of things regarding Onara and Dalan's affairs. With all that's happened, much needs to be decided regarding their joint provinces. I've advised him as best as I could."
"Onara will be grateful for it once she recovers."
Obi-Wan said nothing and Anakin knew he still expected her to hate him once she came out of her _yanol_.
"Sinja-Bau told me that Auna and Zaka are going with you, Master."
Obi-Wan's eyes lit up, and it warmed Anakin's heart to see it. "Yes, it appeared they've taken it upon themselves to become my bodyguards and nursemaids." His lips crinkled into a wry smile.
Anakin returned his smile. "I like them. Especially Auna. She's a riot. I don't think the Temple has yet recovered from her visit."
"I like them too, and though I did not ask them to do so, I'm glad they're coming with me."
Anakin nodded. Then he remembered. He took the package he'd brought with him off his lap and put it on the table, pushing it slowly over to Obi-Wan.
Obi-Wan stared down at it, his face awash with surprise. "You were able to get it all?"
"Yes, Master. Everything you need is there."
Obi-Wan laid his hands on the package, then he looked over at Anakin, his eyes brimming with gratitude. "Thank you, Padawan. Thank you so much."
"You're welcome, Master." Anakin twisted his hands on the table. This was so hard. Then he felt Obi-Wan's hands on his.
"I'm going to miss you too, Anakin. So very, very much."
"I know, Master. But, you're doing the right thing. You really are. I don't believe Onara is going to hate you when she finally recovers. She still loves you. I know she does, and she's going to need you, just as much as you need her."
Again, Obi-Wan said nothing. He drew his hands away and, taking the package, put it inside his travel case. Anakin glanced at the chrono on the wall of the bistro. He had to get back to the Temple. Obi-Wan followed his glance, then looked over at Anakin. The two rose from the table, then Obi- Wan reached over and drew Anakin into his arms, holding him tightly.
"Goodbye, Anakin. May the Force be with you."
"And with you, Master," Anakin replied, willing his tears not to fall, but unable to keep them from doing so.
Obi-Wan held him for a long moment then, pulling quickly away, his face averted, he picked up his travel case and hurriedly left the bistro. Anakin stood for a moment, staring down at the floor where Obi-Wan had stood. Then, his head bowed, his black cape flowing like darkness behind him, he returned to the Jedi Temple.
-------------
Dooku fell to one knee before Sidious. He grimaced. He was not as young as he used to be. All this genuflecting was affecting his joints. But, Sidious expected it, and what Lord Sidious expected, Lord Sidious got. If not, one paid the consequences, which were never pleasant.
"Rise, my apprentice," Sidious intoned.
Dooku did so, gratefully. He adjusted his cloak about his long frame. Then he looked over to where Sidious sat on his black metal throne. For that's what it was. It also resembled, somewhat, the chair in Chancellor Palpatine's office.
"You have done well," Sidious went on.
"Thank you, Master."
"Kenobi has been expelled from the Jedi Order. An unforeseen event, but not an unwelcome one."
"Indeed, my Master."
Sidious leaned closer, but the upper half of his face was still hidden by his black cowl, only his thin lips visible. "I still find it somewhat troubling, however, that you chose to kill Lursan without consulting me first."
Dooku straightened his shoulders. He had expected this. "I understand, Master."
"I'm not sure I approve of such initiative."
"Lursan was becoming a liability. His reckless and brutal murder of Senator Gillom proved that. We had no further use for him."
"So you went to his penthouse to wait for his return."
"Yes, Master."
"But, before you could kill him, Master Kenobi showed up."
Dooku nodded.
Sidious tilted his head. "You could have killed them both."
"I saw no reason to kill Obi-Wan at that moment."
"You did not? Interesting. I wonder, Lord Tyrannus, if your feelings are quite clear regarding our plans."
"They are, my Master. I just do not believe in killing for no reason."
Sidious said nothing for a long moment. "Obi-Wan is still in possession of his Jedi powers."
"The Council saw fit not to strip them from him."
"Interesting," Sidious observed. "Considering that Master Kenobi confessed to such a cold-blooded killing, you would think the Council considered him a great danger."
"We both know he confessed to something he did not do. Perhaps the Council knew it as well and, therefore, knew he was no real threat."
"Yet they expelled him away."
Dooku moved closer. "There are many on the Council and still more within the Jedi Order who sense the growing power of the dark side. The passions Obi-Wan had for his son and still has for his woman is something many of them do not understand. And what they do not understand frightens them. Frightened people do not act rationally. Even if they are Jedi."
Sidious nodded. "Fear leads to anger."
"Anger leads to hate," Dooku responded automatically.
"And hate leads to the dark side," Sidious finished, cackling loudly.
Dooku smiled thinly.
"This Jedi, Master Nygee," Sidious said, once he'd stopped laughing "The one Skywalker has been assigned to. Do you know him?"
Dooku nodded. "Nygee is a very powerful Jedi. He's also a strict constructionist when it comes to the Jedi Code. I've even heard it said he has openly criticized Obi-Wan and his behavior since meeting Senator Lenor."
"Really? Skywalker will not like that." Sidious then grinned his death- heads smile.
"No, he will not. He will chafe under Nygee's tutelage. Their master/apprentice relationship will be a stormy one."
"Surely the Council knows this," Sidious said. "If so, why would they assign him to such a Jedi?"
"Because they fear Anakin. They believe he's the Chosen One, but they are also troubled by him. He's arrogant, rash, but very powerful. They think Nygee will keep him in line since he's so strict."
Sidious chuckled. He knew, as well as Dooku, that the Council had made a critical error assigning Skywalker to Nygee. An error that, in the long run, could also prove quite deadly.
Leaning back, Sidious pursed his lips. "Kenobi is on his way to Ahjane with that comatose woman of his. For now, he is of no more concern to us. But, we shall also keep an eye on him." Sidious placed his hands on the arms of his black throne. "Now it is time to focus on our plans for our Grand Design. You may commence with the latest report from Kamino on the clone production schedule."
Dooku rattled off the numbers, but a part of his mind was still on Obi-Wan. He may have willingly put himself into a position to be expelled from the Jedi Order so he could be with the woman he loved, but he was still a Jedi. He would always be a Jedi. Therefore, he could still be a danger to his and his master's plans. Yes, it would be wise to keep an eye on Obi-Wan.
--------------
Yoda sat in his chair in the Council chamber. All of the chairs had been removed but his. But he was not alone. Mace Windu stood, tall and silent, looking out the large windows at the night skyline of Coruscant.
"Some rest you should get," Yoda said.
Mace turned and looked at him. The lights were low in the chamber, so all Yoda could see were the Jedi Master's dark eyes staring piercingly at him.
"Rest?" Mace scoffed softly. He turned back to the window. "How can one rest on a night such as this."
"Like you, miss him already I do."
Mace folded his arms across his chest. "It need not have come to this."
"No, it need not," Yoda agreed.
"But it has."
Yoda nodded, but said nothing. Mace released a deep heavy breath. He walked over and stood in front of Yoda.
"You let him keep his lightsaber, even though it is forbidden for a Jedi to do so once expelled from the Order." Mace's dark eyes narrowed. "Will he return to us? Have you seen it?"
"Yes."
"Yes? That's all. Not when, not why. Just yes."
Yoda nodded, then averted his gaze from Windu and looked down at the floor.
Mace knelt in front of Yoda, his face centimeters from the ancient Jedi's.
"I did as you asked," he suddenly cried, his voice raw with emotion. "I voted for his expulsion. Now he's gone."
Mace glared at Yoda as he remained silent, then stood. "You're wrong, you know. He's not coming back. Why should he? He believes we betrayed him, that the Force betrayed him."
Yoda raised his head and looked up at the taller Jedi, his leaf-green eyes boring into Mace's darker ones, but he remained silent.
Mace returned Yoda's stare, then shook his head. "I hope you know what you're doing. I truly do. The dark times are coming. We will need him."
Yoda pointed a gnarled finger at Windu. "And be there he will. When darkness covers us all, be there he will."
Mace stared at Yoda a moment longer, his gaze unreadable. Then he turned, his robe sweeping behind him, and left the Council chamber.
Once he was gone, Yoda released the breath he'd been holding. He looked out the window at the night sky, and saw, glimmering in the dark heavens, the stars. Stars in the darkness. Yoda slowly closed his eyes and lost himself within the flowing interstices of the Force.
----------
Obi-Wan gently stroked Onara's hair. They were on their way to Ahjane, the star-yacht speeding through hyperspace. She was still in her _yanol_, but her physical injuries had healed. He glanced over and checked the machines she was hooked up to. The readouts all read normal.
He sat back in the chair next to her bed. The medical bay of the star-yacht was state of the art. He knew there was nothing to worry about, but his sense of disquiet had not eased. There was no more danger, he told himself. Lursan was dead. But, so was Ben and Dalan. Their bodies were down in the ship's hold in stasis. Obi-Wan closed his eyes, the wave of pain that always accompanied thoughts of Ben sweeping through him. A moan escaped his lips.
"Master Kenobi, are ya all right?"
Obi-Wan opened his eyes. Auna was standing in the doorway of the medical bay. Her large violet eyes were staring worriedly at him.
"Auna," Obi-Wan said. "Please, come in."
Auna walked into the room, looking over at Onara. She leaned over, examining her carefully, as she did every time she came to see her. "Do ya think she can hear us, Master Kenobi?"
"I don't know. I don't think so."
Auna stared down at Onara a moment longer, then looked over at Obi-Wan.
"Thinking about yar wee one, weren't ya?"
Obi-Wan nodded, his throat tight. Auna walked over to him and put one of her four hands on his shoulder, pressing it gently.
"Ya should let yarself cry, Master Kenobi. It don't do no good to hold it in."
"I'm all right, Auna. Really I am." He reached over and patted her hand. She nodded and stepped away.
"So, ya did it," she said, her head tilted, her pointed ears twitching.
"What? Did what?"
"Remember that time I asked ya if ya would kill to protect yar wee one and yar lady love. Ya did it."
Obi-Wan nodded. Auna and Zaka still thought he had killed Lursan. He saw no reason to dispute their conclusions. In their eyes he had done the right thing. It no longer mattered to Obi-Wan what people believed or did not believe, what they thought was right or was wrong about Lursan's death. If Obi-Wan had been more of a man and less of a Jedi, Lursan would surely have died at his hands.
He shook his head. "But too late to protect Ben," he whispered.
Auna suddenly fell to her knees, startling Obi-Wan. She put two of her hands on his legs and gazed up at him. He looked down at her. She was rough and she was tough, but she was also quite beautiful.
"Don't," she said softly. "Don't do this to yarself. Yar wee one is gone. But ya are still alive and yar lady love is still alive. The two of ya together made Ben. The two of ya together can make another child."
Obi-Wan shook his head. He reached down and cupped Auna's face. "No, Auna. There will be no more children. I will care for Onara until she recovers and then I will leave."
"What if she asks ya to stay?"
Obi-Wan looked over at Onara, her dark hair spilling across the pillows, her eyes closed as she remained locked in her grief unending. "She will not."
Auna stared up at Obi-Wan as he gazed sadly over at Onara. Then she stood. Obi-Wan looked up at her.
"Well, if that be so, what will ya do? Where will ya go?"
"I don't know. Is there much work out in the galaxy for an ex-Jedi?"
Auna shrugged. "Could be. Me and Zaka, we've been freelancing. Doing jobs here and there. Ya could always hook up with us. Yar good in a fight. We could use ya."
Obi-Wan smiled. "Thank you, Auna. I'll keep that in mind."
Auna looked down at him for a moment, then over at Onara, her lovely face thoughtful. "Well, I'll be saying good night to ya, Master Kenobi. And thanks for getting me a separate cabin. The ship we took to Coruscant, Zaka snored all the way."
"You're welcome. Sleep well. I'll see you both in the morning."
Auna nodded, then, leaning down quickly kissed him on the cheek. She blushed as she rose, then turned and left the med-bay. Obi-Wan sat for a moment. Then he walked over and picked up his travel case. He had yet to take it to his cabin. Once on board he had come straight to the med-bay to be with Onara. He opened it.
Inside were the few personal things he had elected to bring with him: the river stone Qui-Gon had given him on his thirteenth birthday; holopictures of him and Qui-Gon, of him and Bant, and of him and Anakin; a book Sinja- Bau had given upon his departure called _The Classic of Peace and Balance_; the pendant which contained the holographic image of Onara and Ben; the framed picture Ben had drawn for him, his lightsaber, which Yoda had allowed him to keep, and, last of all, the package Anakin had given him.
He took out the package and placed it on a table next to Onara's bed. He opened it carefully. Yes, it was as Anakin had said. Everything was here. He glanced over at Onara, making sure she was all right. Then, sitting down at the table, he took out the tiny, delicate instruments, the metal plating, the magnetic stabilizing ring, the inert power insulator, the cycling field energizers and all the other parts, and, most importantly, the two tiny crystals, one a primary, the other a focusing one. Everything he would need to construct a small lightsaber. Small enough for a child to hold.
But, there was one last thing. In order to construct the lightsaber he had promised Ben, the one he planned to bury with his son, he would have to call on the Force, because only it could guide him as he made the impossibly fine and crucial alignments of the irregular crystals.
Obi-Wan closed his eyes. The Force had betrayed him. It had taken away his son and broken the heart of his love, but only the Force could help him fulfill his promise to Ben. Releasing a deep breath, he opened himself to it, and it rushed into him, like a river that had long been banked. It poured into him, energizing, powerful, strong, and, for a moment, he mourned what he had lost now that he was no longer a Jedi, but when he opened his eyes and looked over at Onara, he let go of his regret.
He focused on his task, his fingers moving surely and skillfully, the Force flowing through him. Soon the lightsaber that began to form between his hands was a small, exact replica of his own. He worked far into the night. Then, finally, as he heard the ship dropping out of hyperspace and making its approach into the Ahjane system, he was done.
Obi-Wan held the tiny lightsaber in his hands, his fingers moving slowly over it. Then he looked up, noting light streaming in from the port window of the med-bay. He placed the lightsaber carefully on the table and walked over to the window. It was the Ahjane sun. The window automatically darkened as it shielded, blocking out harmful UV rays and radiation, but Obi-Wan imagined he could feel the sun's warmth on his face. He gazed out the window, watching as Ahjane came into view, a large blue and green planet. He turned and smiled at Onara.
"You're home, love. You're home."
Onara, of course, remained in her _yanol_, oblivious to him. Obi-Wan turned back to the window, sighing deeply. Then he watched as Ahjane grew larger, the sun's light arcing over its circumference. There was no night or day in space. It was an illusion of a planet's rotation as it orbited about its sun. But to Obi-Wan, as he watched the sun rising over the rim of Ahjane, it felt to him like a new day. The first day of his new life.
The End
That's it, folks, the ending to "Stars in the Darkness". :) First of all, thanks to all of you who went the distance with this fic. I hope you've enjoyed this fic as much as I have writing it. And, yes, I have left a lot up in the air. It's not quite the happy ending, I promised, but there's a lot more story to tell. It looks like this is going to be a trilogy, so the next fic, which I have tentatively titled, "In Love and War" will be up, I hope, soon. Again, thanks so much for reading, for replying and for supporting this fic. It's made my journey writing it a joy. :)
Arwyn Whitesun