Here we go everyone, with the next installment for 'The Consequences of Hangovers, One-Night-Stands and Broken Hearts'!

First off, let me thank you for all the sweet reviews to far! I'm really glad people like this little sequel I wrote, even though this is a project I didn't really plan. While 'The Consequences of Drunken Decisions' was a request more or less PWP fic, the idea for a sequel just clung unto me and practically wrote itself. I have close to no control over where this story is going, haha!

I really hope to be able to update on the story soon, but with my A-levels waiting and many other projects on my schedule (another request fic coming up), it might just take a while.

Special thanks to 'EternalFalsity', for giving me the last motivational boost to finish this chapter (even though school starts for me tomorrow after 2 weeks of fall vacation..ugh I don't wanna go)

Small warning before you get started on the reading: this, once again, contains graphic sex, a rude Mikado and dark themes. Slight bit of angst.

If you're still up to it, enjoy reading!

When the person you love leaves without a word, without a goodbye, without knowing your feelings…you are heart-broken, right?

Something definitely was broken.

It hurts; hurts so much. Make it stop, make it stop, someone please just…

Something definitely hurt.

It hurts, I don't want to think…

A broken heart hurts. So the pain must be coming from within, from his heart. But-…

…why…?

Why was there only emptiness in his heart?

Maybe it was just…

..the emptiness that hurt.

-xxx-

Mikado had been skipping school for about 3 days now. He didn't really feel bad about it. Not like it really mattered anymore. He spent his time lying on his futon and staring up at the ceiling with empty eyes. The last of tears had eventually dried out, but not because the teen was starting to feel better. It seemed more like with every hour that passed with the boy lying there in silence all life and emotion seemed to fade from him. Just lying there, not allowing himself to think.

He was trying to not think at all, but his mind would still take him to the same trail again sooner or later.

He was so pathetic. Even now, all that was on his mind was Kida Masaomi. How often did the other teen still try to contact him, after he had told him in their last phone call to fuck off…?

Did he even try at all?

It seemed like his world had been reduced to the blonde, amber-eyed boy. His laughter, his scent, his warmth, the sound of his voice…

It hurt to think about it, but he still clung to those memories desperately, because they made him feel somehow alive.

Sighing deeply, Mikado turned to his side and picked up his cell phone to look at the display. Spending his days passively like that made the brunette lose track of time and he was quite surprised to find it was already afternoon. He felt a faint pain in his stomach, probably from hunger since the teen hadn't taken in any food for nearly three days now. It was too much of a bother anyway.

He noticed the blinking symbol on his cellphone indicating he had some missed phone calls. Lazily, he scrolled through the list of callers, but since he deleted all his contacts, he could only guess that some of them belonged to Sonohara-san and the rest probably to his mother. Luckily, he had blocked Masaomi's number completely from his cell instead of just deleting it, because he would recognize the hyperactive blonde's cell number anyway, and then he might feel tempted to pick up, just to hear his best friends voice once more…

No, that was a bad idea now. He didn't want to ruin the last bit of relationship he still had to the blonde by acting clingy or pathetic. Masaomi was probably still mad at him because of their small argument from last time. The memory of what had caused it made his cheeks burn slightly in shame, and the teen was remotely surprised that he still had enough emotion left in him to feel embarrassed.

How long would he still be able to feel emotions like that?

He hated thinking about Masaomi because the feeling of being rejected and discarded like that was almost unbearably painful.

But what felt even worse was not feeling anything at all. It makes you forget you are still alive.

Maybe this was why he had become such a masochist.

No matter how much he searched his heart, he couldn't find anything there. Affection, joy, happiness..those feelings had left him long time ago. With Masaomi leaving, his last hope of feeling love had disappeared as well. He had thought that maybe he could at least still hate someone: Masaomi, Saki, Orihara Izaya or even himself. But the concept of strong feelings like love or hate seemed so absurd to him right now, he felt like an emotionless robot.

Pain was the only thing left to feel for him. It make him feel human, made him remember he was still alive.

Maybe it was better to leave this world while he still could feel something…

The gang leader turned on his stomach and buried his face in his pillow. Slowly, without really thinking about what he was doing, he started banging his head against the ground, harder and harder, the pillow softening the impact of his forehead with the hard tatami mat. Yet it was still enough to hurt and make the teen feel dizzy after a few seconds.

Oh yes, that was it. When something was hurting, he could concentrate on the pain, instead on the sickening emptiness he felt within. But the pain on his forehead as well as the dizziness were starting to fade away…

An agonized sob escaped the brunette's lips, but there were no tears left to shed, yet he wanted to cry loudly and shout, wanted to feel something else except for the numbing sadness. He clawed at his chest, where it was aching, aching in a way much worse than physical pain. Not minding anything anymore, the boy quickly crawled out of bed and scrambled to his feet; as if in a haze, he stumbled through the small apartment, not knowing where his feet led him until he found himself in the kitchen, and why was there a knife in his hand?

What was he supposed to do with a knife now-…oh.

Of course. It was so easy. There were so many possibilities to end his miserable state; the answer had been right in front of him all the time. He could choose from so many ways to do this, and all of them would eventually lead to the end of this nightmare he was currently living through, while at the same time providing wonderfully distracting pain.

It was so easy.

The teen heard a quiet, maniac chuckle and it took the brunette a while to realize it was him who was laughing like a madman right now.

His mind was empty except for the thrilling feeling of being so close to escape; escape this torture and let's be serious here, who would even miss him?

His last memories would be of scorching, excruciating pain and at least he would feel.

Now, which way should he do this?

He would really love to just stab the long, sharp knife into his abdomen, twisting it in his entrails until he would be vomiting blood…

Sweet pain, so good, so agonizing, so distracting….

That would certainly be a death painful enough to please him, but there was a chance he might scream or make other noises that would call his neighbors, and he didn't want to take a risk.

He settled for simply cutting his wrists instead.

Need to make it hurt, make it hurt…

A memory of the last day peaceful day he had spent with Masaomi flashed through his mind.

'Good bye, Masaomi'…You never gave me the chance to say that to you in person. I really wish I could have seen you one last time…

An unwanted memory made its way into his thoughts; a memory of piercing crimson eyes hovering above him, while a hot breath tickled his skin and the pale moon light bathed them in silver…

Mikado shook his head quickly to get the image out of his head. None of that matters anymore..

Just as he put the cold, sharp edge of the blade against his pale skin, he heard a loud knocking on the door.

"RYUUGAMINE MIKADO?! THIS IS THE POLICE; PLEASE OPEN THE DOOR!"

You gotta be kidding me.

-xxx-

It had taken the teen full 30 minutes to explain to the police officers at his door that he was, in fact, in no danger at all and that the phone call they received was simply a prank by a childish psychopath who liked to mess with others. When he was finally able to close the door behind the leaving officers, he leaned against the wood with an exhausted sigh. His eyes slipped longingly to the sharp knife still lying on the kitchen counter, but he quickly gave up on that idea again.

It didn't matter if there was a crazy stalker trying to keep him from committing suicide; somehow Mikado knew that even if Orihara Izaya wouldn't interfere, something else would. As if he wasn't made to suffer enough already…

Life was so bothersome, really. And Mikado was tired, so tired of it.

-xxx-

Saki sat silently on the couch, her light grey eyes following the pacing of her upset boyfriend who had been restless muttering to himself for the last few hours, while he effortlessly tried to call someone. Finally, the faux-blonde stopped in his tracks and turned to face the teenage girl with a helpless expression on his face.

"Saki-chan, what am I supposed to do?! Mikado just hung up on me and now I can't reach him anymore, he isn't picking up!"

Saki didn't even get the chance to respond anything, or to ask about the contents of the message Masaomi had received from her mentor that had made her boyfriend so furious and worried, before the hyperactive teen started rambling again.

"I didn't mean to shout at him like that…it's just..I was worried , y'know! He was probably…! Argh, I don't even want to think about it! And now Izaya, that bastard, performed some kind of hypnosis on him or whatever, I don't know, but that's not my Mikado anymore! Mikado would never curse and he certainly wouldn't willingly do..t-that…especially not with Orihara Izaya!"

Saki could just barely suppress a soft smile as her mind set together the pieces of information she had filtered out from Kida's ranting.

Apparently, he had found himself a new play thing. Saki wasn't even sure if that picture (even though she didn't see the contents she could guess) was supposed to just tease the poor, irritated Yellow Scarves leader or if it was an attempt to demonstrate possessiveness over this new toy, which was very typical behavior of her mentor. He could be such a child sometimes.

"That's it! I'm going to call that bastard now!", Masaomi ripped her out of her thoughts as he dialed a number on his cell phone, continuing the restless pacing again as he waited for the other party to pick up.

This whole scheme of fleeing Ikebukuro together with Masaomi – it had all been planned by Orihara Izaya, too. Like everything she did, it was simply an order to be obeyed, but it wasn't like she particularly minded being a chess piece in the complex game of this twisted mastermind who was almost a god and a father figure at the same time to the teenage girl.

She had the blonde teen trapped in a net of false love confessions and guilt; and Masaomi had stumbled into it like a lost lamb. Saki knew he would never leave her. He left his family, his home, his friends behind just to be with her.

This has to be love, right? A small chuckle escaped her lips accidentally, but it went unnoticed by the infuriated teen who was shouting accusations at her mentor over the phone, getting more and more irritated by the second. She would have to soothe him later.

"Oh I swear to you Izaya, if you hang up now I'm coming back to Ikebukuro to murder you personally!", Kida raged before suddenly going quiet, a guilty expression flashing over his face at something the informant must have said to him.

"It's not like it could have been helped…", the teen whispered quietly, suddenly seeming keen on ending the phone call himself.

"Just…just leave him alone, okay? He's going through a lot even without you playing your sick mind games with him..", the teen hissed, before getting cut off by the other male. There was a short pause before the young gang leader spoke up again.

"I don't know…I mean, I don't know the details, but.."

Another pause.

"He was already acting strangely before I left, you can't just blame it all on me!"

Kida seemed to be torn between guilt and anger, and the struggle could be seen on his face evidently. It was quite entertaining to watch for the teenage girl, really.

"Well..no, but…He said he needed to talk to me about something. But we didn't really get the chance to talk before..well.."

Kida went quiet again, before suddenly getting much louder than before.

"Huh? What's that supposed to mean now? Hey! Don't hang up now- Oi, Izaya!"

Gritting his teeth in anger, the blond stared at the device in his hand, the other obviously having hung up on him. Slowly, Masaomi turned around to his girlfriend again, who had been watching the scene quietly.

"Ne Saki-chan…what should I do now?"

-xxx-

In the darkness of his room, hid under his blanket like an animal during hibernation, Ryuugamine Mikado waited for his life to pass by, the only source of light coming from his cell phone display.

The teen himself didn't know for how long he had been lying like this, staring on the only name left in his contact list. It might have been over a day, maybe just a few hours. Not like it mattered anyways.

-Izaya-

The informant hadn't even bothered putting his full name when he had saved the number into the teen's contacts.

For a moment his finger hovered on the call-button, but he quickly pulled it back. He doubted the other would call the police again anytime soon, so he was safe for now. There was really no need for him to call the older male. What would he tell him anyway? He had nothing to say, especially not to that creepy, annoying stalker who thought he could make messing with the teen's life his new pastime activity or whatever.

He had no reason to call the informant. But why did he still feel to sudden urge to do so?

He needed to hear someone's voice, the silence was agonizing, all he could hear were his own thoughts, and man, being all by himself the teen realized that he certainly wasn't entertaining company.

Before Mikado even processed what happened, he already found himself pressing the dial button.

If the brunette thought the silence was agonizing, it was nothing compared to the dialing tone he was hearing now. It made the time stretch endlessly, and even if it probably didn't take more than two minutes for the informant to answer his phone, it felt like at least two hours to the instable teen.

"Mikado…?"

The brunette opened his mouth to answer, but found himself unable to speak, the silence stretching on for a few minutes until the informant seemingly got impatient.

"Mikado? Are you going to talk to me now or not?", the smooth voice coming from his cell phone teased, but the teen still didn't answer. What was he even doing, calling that guy?

Another 30 seconds passed with the teen not saying anything, but for some reason the information broker didn't hang up and just kept talking.

"Fine, if you don't want to talk to me, I will do the talking. I'm really mad at you, you know that? You promised me something, Mikado-kun."

The older male's voice sounded surprisingly sincere as he was scolding the teen, almost accusing, instead of his usual teasing tone.

Promise? Is he talking about me not trying to hurt myself? Or that I should call him every day?

He kind of broke both of those promises, yet he didn't expect the man to actually inform the police, like he said he would.

Finally, almost too quietly for the raven to pick it up over the phone, the young teen replied with a slightly hoarse voice.

"I didn't think you'd really call the cops…"

The small, melodious chuckle he heard the other male give made the brunette's heart beat slightly faster, and for some reason, this fact made the teen confused and irritated.

"Other than you, I stay true to my words."

Hearing those words hurt Mikado in a strange way; maybe it was the irony of the fact that all the people he ever put trust in had let him down in the end, yet the sick, manipulative bastard, who never did anything but mess around, became the most reliable person to the teen.

"You're still a creepy stalker…", the brunette mumbled in reply, pressing the cell phone close to his face.

"So mean, Mikado-kun! I'm sincerely trying to look out for you here!", the informant whined playfully, but his tone soon switched back to serious.

"Come over to my place."

Mikado's finger's gripped the device in his hand tighter for a second, his knuckles turning white.

Going over to that guy's place again? Was that really such a good idea? He'd probably get told some stuff he didn't want to hear, what reassurance did he have that the informant would not try to mentally break him while he was this vulnerable? He tried to commit suicide not too long ago. This was definitely not the best mental condition to be in when going to see a sadistic puppeteer of an information broker who liked to regard people as mere chess pieces.

I want to see him.

Mikado couldn't get that thought out of his head, no matter how hard he tried. It was a bad idea alright, but that wouldn't be the first time he made that mistake, he already became more involved with the raven haired male than he could have ever imagine, how much worse could it get?

The brunette was ripped out of his thoughts by the other male's voice calling out to him.

"Mikado? Are you still there?"

The young gang leader just made an affirmative noise, not having found his voice yet.

"Come over. I'll leave the door unlocked, so you can just come in."

Mikado still remained quiet, a trembling hand clutching the fabric of shirt just over his chest, feeling his heart beat in a jittery, out-of-rhythm way. He didn't want any company while being in this pathetic state, but he simply couldn't stand the loneliness any longer. Damn that Izaya for pretending he cares, when I know he doesn't. He doesn't, he definitely doesn't.

He kept repeating those lines to himself in his head, yet the word the informant uttered softly before hanging up hit him like a hammer.

"Please."

-xxx-

What am I even doing here..?, Mikado thought to himself, standing in front of the informant broker's apartment door. Two hours had already passed since their phone call and the teen was sure the raven had already given up on waiting for him, if he had even expected him to come in the first place. The man could be out working or already asleep by now. The latter wasn't all that unlikely considering it was already two in the morning, yet he stood here, unsure whether to knock, simply walk in or better turn around and go back home. Swallowing down a lump in his throat, he tried pushing against the heavy door as test, and to his surprise it really swung open.

Deciding to discard the remnants of his rationality at the threshold, the teen finally stepped inside. There wasn't any noise to be heard in the apartment, but the lights were switched on; taking off his shoes and leaving them by the door, the brunette proceeded quietly inside. He hadn't taken any time to look around during his last visit (he had been busy doing other things), but this time he inspected the informant's living quarters more closely. The rooms were as cold and sterile as before, but something certainly was different this time around. Mikado noticed it as he was quietly making his way through the living room; the floor was scattered with several documents and paper files. Knowing very well what kind of work the raven did, he didn't dare to look at them closer in fear of getting some information he didn't want to acquire and that would have him targeted by yakuza.

The sound of typing reached his ears and for a second the boy was startled, having forgotten about the apartment's owner being present as well. He proceeded slowly to the large dark desk, at which he found the handsome raven haired male working in the glow of his computer screen; too engrossed in his work to notice the teen's entrance, or simply pretending not to notice him, Mikado didn't know. There was a wrinkle on the man's forehead and a displeased frown on his features as he typed away at his keyboard, eyes glued to the screen.

Mikado stopped a few feet away from the desk and watched the raven do his work, waiting for a reaction from the other male. It really seemed like the elder hadn't noticed his presence yet, so the brunette decided to approach the man, sneaking around the desk and putting his arms around the informant from behind and putting his weight slightly on the man's back in something that could almost count as a hug.

A small smile tugged at his lips when he indeed felt the raven jump slightly beneath his body, before turning his head as best as he could to look at the teen.

"Sorry I didn't notice you entering; I was busy handling a small problem with a client here.", the man smiled, his crimson eyes glinting as he looked up to the standing teen behind him, whose face was hovering inches above his. Maybe it was just Mikado's imagination but it felt like the elder was leaning into his almost-embrace, as if he was happy about the proximity and intimacy.

No way in hell this could be the case. I doubt Orihara Izaya likes to cuddle…

The teen thought quietly to himself, nodding absently as the informant excused himself for having to finish whatever he had been writing at the moment and resting his chin on the man's shoulder.

"I'll be done in a minute."

Mikado just hummed in agreement and looked at the informant's fingers as they rushed over the keys in almost inhumane speed. Several minutes passed with the two of them in that position, neither of them uttering a single word, Mikado just watching the man work. Was it strange to find someone's hands attractive? He really wondered how many women had already fallen prey to the raven's good looks despite his twisted personality. Probably more than he would like to think about. His eyes slid from the keyboard over the dark desk's surface that was full of papers and documents. He had lost his virginity on this very desk. The thought alone should embarrass him to death, yet the memory of the pain, the pleasure, the humiliation just made him feel…weird.

'Horny' would be a more fitting word…

Mikado corrected himself, realizing that he probably left his feeling of shame behind at the threshold as well together with his rational thinking, because before he even knew what he was doing, he was running his small, hot tongue along the soft skin of the raven's neck. The surprised shudder it earned him from the distracted male oddly pleased him, and he planted a kiss at the man's pulse, sucking softly on it as the raven had done to him occasionally before.

"Mikado…", the informant finally spoke up, his typing getting slower with longer pauses. His voice sounded slightly strained and Mikado decided to push his luck by letting his hand slide over the man's toned torso teasingly, while gently biting the raven's earlobe. The young gang leader felt his own breath go faster as he felt the attractive male shiver beneath his touch, and his face and body were getting hotter. The teen continued this game for some moments, enjoying the way he was throwing the usually so composed informant out of his concentration with his ministrations. The raven's skin tasted addictively sweet to the turned on boy, his lips kissing and his tongue licking every patch of skin he could reach in a teasing and slow manner, like enjoying an exquisite treat. The small noises he drew from the elder settled oddly within him and only served to spur on his own arousal even further. A strained growl from the raven was the only indicator that the informant's self-restraint had finally snapped.

A small surprised yelp escaped the brunette's lips when Izaya grabbed his wrist and guided the hand, which had been caressing the raven's chest playfully, down to his lap; making teen feel the hot hardness of his manhood. A needy moan escaped Mikado's lips at the action, he could feel the informant's erection so clearly through the fabric of the man's trousers and he felt his own pants get tighter, knees buckling.

"If you're going to touch me, do it properly.", the raven hissed hotly into the teen's ear with a mischievous smirk, still pressing the other's small hand to his erection. His work could wait. He certainly wasn't going to pass up this opportunity, especially if it was the brunette who had initiated it.

Mikado leaned heavily on the other male now, face flushed and breath hot and ragged; with trembling fingers he slowly undid the informant's belt and zipper, freeing the man's stiff, hot cock from the fabric's confines. His heart beat faster in excitement as his shy fingers explored the heated, hard flesh curiously. He gripped it with his hand carefully, much more careful than he needed to be, and started to stroke. Doing this to someone else was completely different than doing it to himself and that was a thing he hardly ever did, so his experience was close to zero. Concerned he might be doing something wrong, he continued his cautious ministrations, while at the same time getting strangely turned on by the act himself. His jittery fingers stroked up and down the elder's shaft and Mikado could feel the sexual desire swell within him, a hotness in his groin that made him gasp in need, rubbing his legs together to keep his aching arousal in check while doing to the informant's erect manhood what he wanted to be done on himself; rubbing the red, heated tip carefully because this action always made his vision go white from the pleasure, and really, it drew out a strangled moan from the raven. But still, it was hard to concentrate on the task with his face pressed into the crook of Izaya's neck like that because his scent was flooding the teen's senses and it was so arousing, the brunette couldn't help but moan breathily against the other's skin, his fingers trembling even more now. Eventually, the informant enclosed the teen's small hand with his, uttering an impatient noise.

"You suck at this, Mikado.", he breathed teasingly, guiding the boy's hand in its movements with his own, watching the teen gasp heatedly and lean even more unto the raven, his small frame was hunched so he was almost bent over the informant's lap completely.

Mikado let the other male guide his movements, the sensation of the elder's hot flesh against his palm felt alien yet strangely erotic, he could feel every vein on the others arousal and the memory of this large organ having entered him completely made his heart pound.

Just when did he become such a lewd, sex-crazy individual? Maybe it was due to the fact, that apart from pain, pleasure and lust were the only sensations left to make him feel alive.

A spark of pleasure, almost like electricity, shot through his body and made him gasp breathlessly as there suddenly was a hand between his legs, palming the aching bulge of his arousal lightly. He didn't even realize the elder's hand having left his, but now the informant was touching him where all the heat, lust and need had concentrated and it felt so heavenly, Mikado closed his eyes and muffled a moan in the raven's shoulder.

"A-aah..! Hnngh, Izaya…", he forced out, trying to keep himself from pressing his knees together to still the shaking of his knees, because no matter what, he didn't want the man to stop touching him; even though it had only been a few days, it felt like years to the teen since he last had been touched like that and it was addicting, so good, but yet not nearly enough to satisfy him.

He didn't want to resort to begging the elder so soon already, but as much as he tried he couldn't bring himself to care anymore, and god was it hard to concentrate; he knew if he would stop his own hand from moving the informant would be displeased and he didn't want Izaya to stop touching him too, but he could feel his own hand halt every now and then and his movements were becoming hasty and jittery again.

"Nggh..I-..Izaya..please..nhh..", he begged heatedly and breathlessly, not sure what precisely he was asking for anyway, but it didn't matter since Izaya decided to have mercy on the hopelessly horny teenager.

"Take off your pants and come here.", the elder commanded huskily, impatiently tugging the needy brunette into his lap roughly as soon as the boy had slipped his trousers and underwear down to his knees with shaky fingers and slipped out one leg. Izaya position the teen's knees on each side of his legs and brought their straining erection together without hesitation, enclosing them with his own hands, supporting the young gang leader with his other arm as the boy collapsed against his chest with a lustful whimper at the action.

They remained motionless in this position for a few seconds as both of them tried to catch their breath and Izaya tried to collect the remains of his self-composure. The brunette in his lap nuzzled his face into the other's neck like a cat asking for attention before bringing his trembling lips to the elder's ear and whining into it wantonly:

"G-god Izaya..hhn..you are so cruel..pl..ease do something already, I'm going insane..!"

The informant snickered slyly at his plea, but his voice sounded deeper and huskier than usual and the firm grip he had on the teen's erection, without moving his cursed hand even one bit made the boy groan in frustration, squirming slightly in the informant's lap.

"'Something'? You're being so vague again, Mikado-kun. I really do know what to do if you don't tell me.", the devil in disguise teased the teen mercilessly, finally moving his hand and squeezing their erections together, sliding his fingers up and down cruelly slow, drawing a breathless, desperate moan from the brunette.

"Is this what you want me to do?", Izaya purred playfully, feeling the urge to chuckle when he felt the trembling teen nod frantically against his neck, barely able to suppress the moans spilling forth from his lips as the raven continued to send him to heaven with sweet, torturous strokes.

"Or do you maybe want me to touch you here too..?", the elder whispered into his ear hoarsely, sliding his unoccupied hand down the teen's back, sliding his cold fingers between the boy's buttocks, making the brunette jump startled with an endearing yelp that soon turned into an embarrassed, lustful whimper.

Izaya smiled quietly as he continued to tease the boy by prodding at the puckered entrance while quickening the pumping of their erections with his other hand, their heated, hard lengths sliding against each other, slickened up by the precum already leaking from the tip of the smaller male's erection.

"Ahhhn..Izaya..hnn..Izaya..Izaya..!"

The young gang leader continued to gasp the other's name breathily like a chant, his arms sliding around the raven's neck and clinging to him so desperately, it was quite untypical of the teen.

"Mikado..?", the informant whispered, a hint of concern in his voice.

"P-please Izaya…I need you..I want you to fuck me hard..", Mikado begged huskily, his hot and erratic breath hitting the elder's skin, but somehow the teen's voice didn't quite match his words.

He sounded so desperate, so at loss, as if he was about to cry.

Something had happened, and within seconds Izaya realized that the young Dollars leader just wanted to be held, but there was no way the teen would admit that to himself, so he fled himself into the sensation closest to it, which the informant himself had taught the formerly so innocent boy – lust.

Stopping his ministrations, the informant grabbed the teen by the shoulders, pushing him away gently so he could look into the brunette's face. Just as expected, and yet so unexpected, the boy's face was flushed and his eyes clouded with pleasure, but there was a look in those azure depths, so empty and so sad, it wrenched the raven's heart.

Taking a hold of the brunette's chin, he leaned in and kissed the boy slowly and gently. He could sense the teen's confusion and slight irritation in the sudden change of their pace; he knew the boy hated it when he was gentle with him, that he felt like he needed the roughness, the pain, the humiliation, the abuse. But Izaya wasn't going to have any of this anymore. Not tonight, when his favorite toy looked so unbelievably frail, like he might break at the slightest touch.

Pulling away slowly, he locked eyes with the puzzled and slightly resistant teen and whispered quietly:

"You're not going to have it your way tonight."

Mikado averted his eyes quickly, the denied pleasure and the awkwardness of the sudden intimacy making him tremble and his heart beat uncomfortably fast.

"W-What are you talking about..?", the teen inquired cautiously, the distinct fear of getting rejected gnawing at his insides.

Izaya smiled at the brunette slyly, while running his hand almost affectionately through the boy's dark locks. "It's simple. No pain, no abuse this time. And you'll look me in the eyes. Those are my conditions."

What's deal with him now? Seriously, I don't get this guy at all…!

Mikado thought almost sullenly to himself, feeling a sudden wave of embarrassment well up within him at the prospect of the sex being all gentle and intimate. This wasn't what he signed up for when he started this sick affair, with the most twisted person known to him on top of all.

Yet he couldn't bring himself to say 'no', his heart thumping unbelievably fast.

Swallowing down the heavy lump in his throat, he buried his face in the crook of the informant's neck again, to hide from the man's piercing crimson gaze.

"W-Whatever. Do what you want..", he whispered, trying to sound nonchalant, but the nervousness was overly present in his voice.

"I will.", Izaya chuckled quietly, before gripping their erect members anew and resuming his stroking, this time picking up the pace, returning the brunette to a moaning and writhing mess once again. His thumb rubbed over the teen's sensitive head repeatedly, pleased at how a shudder shook the brunette's body at the action, accompanied by a whimpered moan.

"Hhnn..! G-godd..Izaya..please..stop teasing me..", Mikado gasped out, his vision turning white repeatedly. With each stroke he was feeling hotter and hotter; he didn't even realize he had unconsciously started moving his hips, desperately searching for more friction he bucked his hips to have his erection slide against the informant's hard length. It felt so good, for a short moment he forgot everything, all the dark thoughts and concentrated solely on the pleasure washing in waves over his body, soothingly, hot, burning. His arms still around the raven's neck, he threw his head back, eyes closed and lips parted with breathless gasps and moans, his back arching and hips thrusting. He was so close, and yet so far away from what he was craving, it wasn't still quite enough yet. As if the elder had read his thoughts, Mikado could feel the raven's long, slender fingers push into his mouth and without hesitation, the brunette parted his mouth further to invite them in, his hot tongue slicking against the digits that felt so oddly erotic, pushing in his mouth. He closed his soft lips around them and started sucking, not minding the saliva running down his chin; the man's fingers continued to slide against his soft tongue while the raven's other hand squeezed his erection in a way that made him almost double over in pleasure. The young gang leader moaned the informant's name repeatedly, cheeks flushed, eyes squeezed shut and brow furrowed in desperate need, but due to his mouth being occupied all that came out were incoherent noises. Finally, Izaya withdrew his saliva slick fingers from the boy's mouth and before the brunette even processed what was happening, the wet digits were already prodding at his entrance, making the teen twitch and tremble in anticipation.

Slowly, almost mockingly so, the first finger pressed into him, bringing about an alien sensation that made the teen feel the pleasure from Izaya pumping his cock all the more. Lust clouded azure eyes fluttered open slowly as he peeked curiously at the informant's face, only inches apart from his. A bolt of lust and embarrassment shot through his body at finding the man's gleaming auburn eyes fixated on him firmly, their eyes locking and making the brunette unable to look away.

H-Has he been staring at me the whole time like that…?, the teen thought panicked and felt all of a sudden extremely embarrassed, wanting to hide his face from the other male, hide the odd expressions he was making, but he simply couldn't turn his head away and now there was another finger inching into him; Mikado could feel his face warp in an expression torn between pleasure and slight discomfort and he quickly bit his lower lip to stop the moans from escaping his throat. All he could do was whimper helplessly while the raven watching him so intensely made him feel everything much more clearly.

Bit by bit, the informant's fingers were entering him and stretching him slowly, preparing him much more carefully and thoroughly then during their last times, the slight pain and discomfort fading into mind numbing pleasure much too soon and Mikado found himself unconsciously pushing back on the man's fingers, wanting them deeper inside him, but it wasn't enough, it was far from enough.

His blue pleasure hazed eyes were begging the elder wordlessly to be taken already, a needy whimper being all the teen was able to force out.

"You're so impatient.", whispered Izaya against the brunette's temple, kissing it gently before slowly withdrawing his fingers, a smile tugging at his lips at the displeased noise the boy uttered at the loss.

"Hold onto me, okay?", the informant said, before standing up from the office chair carefully; with the teen holding unto his neck and the boy's legs around his waist, he carried the brunette over to the black leather couch standing in the middle of the living room, because there was no way his office chair would withstand the things he planned to do to the young Dollars leader now. The second Mikado's back touched the leather of the couch, the elder's hot, rock hard length was sliding into him without warning, making the teen tighten the hold his legs had on the man's waist, his hands helplessly clawing at the raven's broad back as he was penetrated agonizingly slow; while with less resistance than their other times, the informant's length inched only slowly into the teen's tight heat, stretching the boy's insides slightly painfully. Mikado had expected his body to be used to the raven's girth by now, but all his thoughts stopped once again at the astounding feeling of being filled so much. By the time the raven's length was finally buried completely inside him, Mikado could feel sweat running down his temple, his heart thumping away at a racy pace and his breath going quick and erratic. There was discomfort alright, but without the excruciating pain from being entered unprepared numbing him, he could feel the other male inside him so clearly it almost drove him insane. It pressed into him so hard, so hot, so deep; unable to think anything, with his arms around Izaya's neck, he simply pulled the taller male on top of him, their bodies so close there wouldn't fit a sheet of paper between them, his legs around the informant's waist urging him on to move already, their foreheads pressed together, their breaths mingling and his gleaming ocean blue eyes begging for the same.

Closing his eyes with an impatient, lust-filled groan, the informant cursed: "Shit..you drive me insane, Mikado..", before leaning in to kiss the young gang leader hungrily, giving up on his resolution to go easy on the brunette this night, because how could he stay calm when the boy was looking at him like that?

A demanding tongue pushing past Mikado's kiss swollen lips and ravaging the teen's hot cavern; Izaya started thrusting into the hot, tight heat engulfing him, feeling the brunette squirm and writhe beneath him from the pleasure, the smaller male's hips moving to meet his thrusts, eager for the friction and penetration and he could tell the young gang leader was running out of breath from once again forgetting to breathe during their kiss, but he didn't want to pull away yet, his tongue pushing and tossing the other's wet muscle around in a passionate fight while he was slamming much harder and rougher into the boy than he had intended and the brunette's positive reactions really didn't help him to maintain his composure. Finally releasing the boy from their deep kiss before the teen would faint from the lack of oxygen, Izaya tugged at the teen's lower lip with his teeth, adoring how the boy's gasps for air mingled with pleasure filled moans and whimpers and the eventual cry of his name. There was nothing more erotic than hearing the young Dollars leader call out his name in a moment of ecstasy and complete loss of control.

"Hnn..a-ahh…! I-Iza..ya…ggn..d-deeper…please..!", Mikado begged gasping, head thrown back against the backrest of the couch, azure eyes barely open with small tears of restraint forming in the corners, a crimson flush spreading over the teen's cheeks and nose up to his ears. To Izaya, the teen was like a work of art, he felt like he could look at him all day and never bore of it.

"As you wish, Mikado-chan…", the raven purred dearly, a smirk tugging at his lips as he penetrated the gasping brunette even deeper, piercing the small male's prostate dead on, groaning at how it made the boy's inside tighten strongly around him, Mikado's mouth opening in a soundless gasp as if the air had been knocked out of his lungs. Izaya attempted to tug the teen's shirt off the boy's small frame, but no matter how much he tried, the brunette just wouldn't let go of his neck, clinging to him like a small child refusing to let go of his favorite toy. It was endearing really, but Izaya still got frustrated with the shirt being in the way of being able to touch the teen's skin, very annoyingly so; with an irritated growl he pulled the boy's shirt up and made the brunette bite on the hem, so it would be held up; while still mercilessly abusing the teen's prostate, he ran a hand over the warm, soft skin revealed, fingers rubbing an already erect nipple teasingly, bending his neck to lick and suck the other. Izaya could feel Mikado's nails claw into his shoulders and the teen breathlessly gasping and moaning his name, back arching to give the elder better access to his chest, the feeling of having those sensitive nerves teased pushed Mikado faster and faster towards the edge.

"G-gaahh..Izaya..t-that's too much..I..I can't..!", the young gang leader forced out, the hem of the shirt falling from his mouth, his head spinning and thoughts a mess, his whole body felt hot, so incredibly hot it was unbearable; it felt so good, so heavenly, yet it was torture, he needed more he was so close, so incredibly close..!

Izaya pressed his lips upon the teen's again, and again and again; the kisses much too sweet for the boy to handle, making him feel like he was melting on the inside. This felt wrong, it felt wrong that this felt so good.

And just with one sweet, lingering kiss Mikado felt his vision go white, his body burning up with hot searing, electrifying pleasure and all he could think of was one thing as he called out the informant's name gasping:

I want to live.

-xxx-

Mikado didn't know how long they remained in that position on the couch, him lying on top of the informant with his head resting on the man's broad chest. He still felt out of breath and dazed from his orgasm, but the way Izaya's fingers were slowly running through his hair made his breathing calm down and a drowsiness taking over his body.

"Mhh..stop that, Izaya..", he muttered half-heartedly, feeling like he shouldn't give in to the man's affectionate gestures. They were just fake after all.

"Why? You seem to like it.", the informant whispered back with a smile, pressing a kiss to the brunette's forehead, noticing the slight blush on the teen's still flushed face.

"Mikado…", the raven spoke up again after a few moments of silence. "What you tried to do today…Don't ever do that again." His tone was surprisingly serious, almost scolding.

Mikado lifted his head from the informant's chest, looking into the raven's crimson eyes with an unreadable expression, but Izaya could catch a glimpse of the emptiness, the sadness he had noticed before in the teen's deep, azure eyes.

"It's none of your business, now is it?", the boy said with a cold voice, the words sounding much harsher than he intended, but he couldn't allow himself to feel sympathy for a man who was only using him as his new plaything. This was what he was to the informant, nothing more.

Pushing himself up on his elbows, Izaya looked down at the teen with a displeased frown.

"It is very well of my business. I won't let you push me away that easily."

Mikado just averted his eyes with a small scoff, his lips twisting in a bitter smile when he spoke the following words:

"Still..it is somehow ironic how you of all persons try to lecture me about trying to take my fate in my own hands."

Izaya raised an eyebrow at this. "Fate? What do you mean?", he inquired, but received no answer from the teen, who had rested his head back on the raven's chest. The raven frowned at the young gang leader ignoring him, bringing up a topic which he was sure would pique the teen's interest.

"Kida-kun called me again last night."

At those words, Mikado shot up straight, sitting up on the man's waist, hands propping him up on the man's chest. "M-Masaomi did..?", he asked with an desperate expression, voice shaking.

Now it was Izaya's turn to smile bitterly, trying to suppress his irritation at how the brunette only seemed to have thoughts for this good-for-nothing friend of his.

"Yes. Want to know what he said?", the informant asked, mustering the various expressions flashing over the smaller male's face at the inquiry.

Positive the teen would say yes, Izaya felt slightly taken aback when the boy suddenly shook his head, averting his eyes.

"I don't want to hear.", he whispered, more to himself than to the informant.

Izaya mustered the Dollars leader quietly, unable to let the issue go so simply.

"When you asked to talk to Kida-kun before he left, what did you want to tell him then?"

No answer. The teen just continued averting his eyes, face completely expressionless, but the way the boy's nails dug into his skin gave away how much this talk actually hurt the teen.

"Did you want to confess to him?", Izaya pressed on. He could tell Mikado didn't want to talk about it, but as an informant he just needed to know everything about the one human he became so engrossed with.

Once again, the boy didn't speak, but still it felt like the brunette was confirming his guess. But there was one thing Izaya was interested in knowing much more.

"Why now?" There was no way the teen could have predicted Kida leaving Ikebukuro, as it was a change in plans he only came up with in last second. Also, that wouldn't match with the boy's reaction at all; after all he had had a mental breakdown after Kida had suddenly left. So why did he so suddenly decide to confess his feelings?

There it was again, this strange bitter smile that looked so out of place on the teen's features. So devastated.

"I wanted to do it while I still had time.", Mikado muttered quietly.

Izaya wanted to ask what he meant by those words, but before he could utter anything he saw the brunette swaying slightly, collapsing against the raven's chest.

"Mikado?! Are you alright?"

The teen stirred, trembling hands trying to push his body up again. Thank god, he wasn't unconscious.

"Y-Yeah, I just blacked out for a bit…", the teen mumbled, sitting up again carefully, but being disturbed by the informant's hands sliding up his shirt suddenly.

"You didn't eat anything again, now did you?", Izaya scolded him, feeling up the boy's ribs; Mikado just looked away, muttering: "What are you, my mom?"

Izaya just sighed and shoved the brunette off his chest. "You are incorrigible." Fixing his and the boy's clothes, he pulled the gang leader up from the couch and led the protesting teen into the kitchen. Digging out some leftover food made by his housekeeper Namie, he handed it to Mikado with a scolding look.

"Eat it, or I'll feed it to you by force."

Wary of the raven's threat, the teen accepted the food with a pout, half-heartedly glaring the now smirking informant.

"You are so bothersome, really."

"Only for you, sweetheart.", the raven purred in reply.

-xxx-

Finally having succeeded in making the stubborn teenager take in some food, Izaya hugged the boy from behind as soon as he was finished, nuzzling the brunette's neck affectionately while ignoring the teen's protest and attempts to shove him away.

"Ne Mikado..You are hiding something from me, aren't you?", Izaya whispered against the teen's neck, expecting the boy to deny it, but instead he just went completely quiet.

"So what if I am..?", Mikado muttered after a while, almost too quietly for the informant to hear.

Izaya clicked his tongue displeased, tightening his grip possessively around the boy's waist, who had resumed his struggle once more. "I don't like the thought of you hiding things from me."

Mikado just scoffed at that, finally managing to turn around in the man's embrace, pushing against the raven's chest to put some distance between them.

"Don't make it sound like I have any obligations to you, you're not my boyfriend.", the young gang leader mumbled with a glare.

"I wish I was, though.", Izaya smiled softly, making a blush spread across the teen's face for a second, before the boy's expression turned bitter again, finally shaking the other male off completely, turning away from the man.

"If you really like me, then don't try to dig into my matters further."

The raven just let out a low chuckle at that, stepping closer to the boy again. "I'm an informant. Digging into people's personal matters is my occupation."

"Don't do it. Please.", Mikado whispered. He wanted to walk away from the informant, but a sudden wave of fatigue made him sway again, causing him to fall against the man behind him, who caught his fall.

"I think it's better if you stay over."

-xxx-

After several minutes of protest from the teen, Mikado finally gave in to the raven's will and was, much to the brunette's dislike, carried to the bedroom by the informant. After Izaya put the teen to bed, he stayed a while watching the young gang leader sleep, before returning to his computer.

Although the teen had insisted on him not making any further research on the brunette, Izaya just couldn't help wanting to find out what the other was hiding from him. It wasn't only his curiosity that led him to do so – something was obviously wrong with the Dollars leader.

Izaya knew him long and well enough to know that even when confronted with great setbacks, the boy didn't give up easily.

If he really loved that blonde imbecile as much as he claimed, why didn't he try to follow him? Why did he give up on trying to confess his feelings so quickly? Izaya just had to know.

Little did he suspect, that after a sleepless night full of research, he would stumble upon an answer he wished he'd never gotten.

The golden rays of the rising sun bathed the informant's office in a warm light, illuminating the lone figure of the raven sitting at his desk, hesitant to click on the one file he had spent hours on obtaining. The one file containing the answer to all his questions. Upon opening it, Izaya wished he had never tried to find out, as the answers he received made informant go cold and unable to move. Slowly, ever so slowly, the usually so calm and composed man buried his face in his hands. Only a careful observer would notice the slight trembling of the male's strong shoulders, as he muttered only one word.

"Why..?"

-xxx-

The sound of quiet footsteps broke the informant out of his daze, shocked crimson eyes looked up to see a small figure entering the room. He couldn't bear the look in those deep, azure eyes, as the teen said with an incredibly sad smile:

"You saw it, didn't you?"

Mikado's eyes were so empty, yet Izaya felt like he would drown in the sadness reflected in them.

"Mikado…", the informant whispered, his voice barely above a whisper. Mikado faintly wondered why he sounded just as hurt as Mikado felt.

Averting his eyes, he laughed quietly and darkly. "Destiny is cruel sometimes, isn't it?"

All of a sudden, a loud crash could be heard. Upon looking up, he saw that Izaya had knocked the computer screen off the desk, teeth clenched in anger and despair.

The next thing Mikado knew was Izaya hugging him tightly, almost painfully.

Yet what hurt the most, were the words the informant uttered quietly, barely audible.

"I don't want you to die."

The man's statement sounded stubborn, almost childish.

Mikado smiled bitterly and for the first time in days, he felt tears well up in his eyes again, as he returned the raven's hug hesitantly.

Burying his face in Izaya's chest to not have to see the picture on the computer screen that the informant threw down.

The picture of his own CT scan staring back at him, mockingly.

That big white spot of the tumor in his brain seemed to be scorning him; looking like a parasite eating away at his very insides.

"I don't want to die either."

To be continued.