CHAPTER EIGHT: SHOCK AND SACRIFICE

David felt like his head was full of cotton as he came to, and he wondered why he was lying propped up in a chair. He opened his eyes, and saw the Control Room. Wait, how had he got here?

Then memories started floating back to him, a bit at a time.

"Oi!" he shouted as the TARDIS flew across space. Curie whined as she struggled to stay in one place. "What're you doing, Old Girl?! He needs us both!"

The TARDIS didn't answer, except to make what sounded like a apologetic moan that he hadn't known was part of her vocabulary. Then they landed, and David was ready to launch into a rant.

Except a hologram suddenly appeared in the room. It was the Doctor. David stepped back in shock.

"David, if you're seeing this, then Emergency Protocol One has kicked in. Meaning either I'm dead, or things are so dangerous that I can't risk your life any further. The TARDIS is or has taken you home to your family, or just to Curie. I put this in because if the worst happens to me, I can't let you die."

His eyes widened. But he didn't have a chance to comment.

"The TARDIS will be in your hands, David. Unless she leaves you to try to come back for me, you are her guardian now. Since you're a bit psychic, you should be able to bond with her more than you already have. Please teach your children how to care for her, because she's all that's left of Gallifrey, my home-world, now. Otherwise she has to be let alone, go into hiding. The world would pass her by, eventually covering her in dust. And I know she doesn't want that, not when she could have people we both trust looking after her."

Then the hologram hesitated for a moment, as if the Doctor was grappling with something else as he recorded it. "Oi, Old Girl!" he shouted at the ceiling. "I can't!"

But David could hear a whining noise that wasn't coming from the present moment. He realised it was the TARDIS at the moment this was recorded.

Sighing the Doctor looked back up, which happened to make it seem like he was staring right into David's eyes.

"Good to see you're well."

It was the tense sound of the Doctor's voice that brought more of the memories flooding back. He pushed numbly to his feet. "What... I... Did I really agree to let the TARDIS expose me to the Vortex energy?"

He sat in his kitchen, staring at his favourite mug. The TARDIS had told him what she thought the whole Healer message that had been following him ever since he'd started travelling with the Doctor. A message from himself... after he'd taken some of the Vortex energy into his head.

It was dangerous, the Old Girl had admitted, and would be a lot for him to deal with. But, although she had an idea for a plan to save the Doctor and the Game Station, she wasn't confident that there wouldn't be disastrous consequences on the time-lines... unless David basically forfeited his life for his friend's sake. Against his final request:

"Don't try to come back. I know you, and you don't give up on friends. But this is important. David Noble, I need you to live, to have the good life with a family that you deserve."

"You did, you flew her back to me, and stopped the Daleks. Did everything you could to not let them kill, to try to handle it without killing them. Although you had no choice in the end – they would've destroyed more than they did. You were brilliant. Even managed to undo loads of damage."

David looked at the Doctor as another thing clicked. "Wait, if I took all that into my head, how come I'm still alive? I was prepared to die to keep you alive."

There was no other choice. He couldn't live with himself if he didn't try.

So he'd rushed through checking that his will was up-to-date, and then he made his taking what he figured would be his final run with Curie. Then he wrote a series of letters – his final requests to friends and family, and the goodbyes he couldn't say in person. They'd all try to talk him out of it, so he was taking what he knew was the coward's way out.

Writing to Mickey was easy – he mentioned another congratulations over dumping the milestone Mickey had called a girlfriend, and told him to use his inheritance to fund his career and to help him start a family. His parents and grandparents... were informed of what he'd really done for Nerys and Laurie. And those two got their own letter, filled with all sorts of messages to be delivered later on.

Then he'd locked the house, leaving a concerned Curie behind after hugging her for the last time. Either Nerys or Laurie would be by to check on her, and they'd be the first to find out what he'd done.

With a heavy heart, he'd stepped in front of the section of the Controls he felt the TARDIS indicate, and watched as the Old Girl opened to him.

All the time utterly aware that it would kill him in the end.

"I wasn't going to let you die," the Doctor snapped. "I have too few people left. Some are dead, others moved on, and some of those won't want to see me again. Not all of them know about regeneration."

"Wait..." That last word sudden made David notice the occasional golden glow coming from the Doctor's hands. "You're... dying?"

"Yep."

"Why? How?"

The Doctor squirmed. "I... absorbed the TARDIS energy from you when – after you'd done all that could be done for the people of the Game Station – you were losing control over it, when it was about to cause permanent damage that would've killed you."

"How the hell did you absorb it? What aren't you telling me? It went into my eyes, I remember that much. If the TARDIS couldn't draw it back out, how did you do it?"

A blush crossed the Time Lord's face. "Eh, what was necessary. Best you don't remember, knowing your bent."

"My bent?! What's your gob on about? My bent...? Oh you didn't..."

"Didn't what?" The Doctor wouldn't meet his eyes.

David's jaw tried to hit his chest. "You... you kissed me?!"

The Doctor watched in horror. He couldn't even feel any pride in David's restraint over how he fixed things, carefully saved lives. But when David cried out in pain, sweat starting to run down his face, he knew that he'd lost control – and he could feel that he'd accidentally made Jack immortal. He'd just revived everyone else, but it did far worse to Jack. "You can't die!"

David struggled against the pain to speak. "There's only one of you. There're lots of humans. My life is... expendable by comparison."

"Not to me it isn'!" the Doctor exclaimed, standing up. This was not how he'd wanted this to go down, but what choice did he have? He rushed over and grabbed David's head. Before the human could register what was happening, their lips were pressed together.

The Doctor used his mind to draw the energy into himself, and as it did David's body went stiff, ceasing his brief struggle against the kiss. The Time Lord's body began to burn as the overwhelming energy flowed into him and he used it to heal David on its way out. And as the last bits left him, David's body went limp, and the Doctor barely caught him.

Holding him tightly against him, the Doctor exhaled the energy back into the TARDIS. As she shut her Control panel, he glared at her. How, he demanded silently, could you let him do that, encourage him to do that? Because he could sense that the TARDIS had opened for him.

Because, the TARDIS answered calmly, I did not dare imagine what would happen if I failed in my other plan to save you and the Station. And he must continue travelling with us. I don't know why, my Thief.

The Doctor hated it when his ship pulled that on him, but she had never been wrong. Still, he thought as he lifted David – with some effort, thanks to the beginnings of the cycle – into his arms and carried him inside, must leave. Now.

The Doctor cringed at the tone. "It was the only way to save you! I don't regret dying for you! What amazes me is that you came after me. I thought that would be the end."

It took the human man a number of seconds to be able to form words. "You... I'm that important that you'll waste a life?"

"It's not wasting a life!" The Doctor's eyes flashed at him. "You have a life that has a lot of important work left, your time line was not finished. I might not know when the majority of people are expected to die, but I know that yours is meant to carry on for decades yet."

David's first instinct was to carry on with the questions, but he noticed the Doctor grab his wrist, rubbing it as the hand below it glowed briefly again. "Why haven't you regenerated yet?"

He looked up slowly, sadly. "I didn't want you waking to find a stranger in the TARDIS. I almost did that to someone else I loved, and I wasn't going to let it happen."

"You can... hold back the regeneration?"

"With difficulty," he grated.

David paled. "Doctor, is holding it back going to make the regeneration worse?"

The Doctor grimaces tightly. "Yes. Doubt it'll be worse than when my eighth self was born. Or this me. 'Eck, my fifth self had a very bad death. Probably made me into the berk that was my sixth self. Help me land the TARDIS first? I'm trying to get us back to just after when you left."

"Then why didn't you ask me first thing?!" David flew to the other side of the Controls. "What do I need to do?!"

The two spent a tense couple of minutes struggling with the TARDIS controls. Although the Old Girl was trying to cooperate, between getting her energy back and the Doctor losing control over his own body it was like trying to hold back a tsunami. The landing nearly knocked them both to the floor.

"Hah!" shouted the Doctor. "We're here! Right outside your home, just when I said I wanted to go. The Old Girl granted my dying wish."

David froze, blood going cold. "Wait, where's Jack? What happened to him?"

The Doctor shuddered. "You accidentally let too much saving energy into him. He can't die anymore. I don't feel it's safe to regenerate around an unnatural fixed point."

"But... you left a friend behind?!"

"He's going to be fine! I can sense it! The TARDIS told me she sesnes he'll eventually cross paths with us again."

"Doctor, that's nonsense. You don't leave a friend behind. How long will it be before Jack notices this? How's that going to change him?"

The Time Lord cringed, not just because of the pain he was in. A berating from David always stung, and this one hurt more.

Looking as the glowing got stronger, David gulped. "Is it safe to let it happen around me?"

"As long as you don't touch me until after it's done." The Doctor suddenly gasped as the pain got worse. "David, please don't make me leave. I know you didn't want anything more than friendship from me, but I have no one else to turn to. I'm gonna be sick from this regeneration, and there's no one I'd trust more to look after me. Will you?" He couldn't meet his eyes, afraid of what he would find there.

He closed his eyes, hating to see the pain, and took a deep breath. "I went ahead with the TARDIS' plan because I couldn't let a friend die." He opened his eyes to look right at his friend. "And you've been my best friend ever. I won't turn my back on you just because you've dropped one flipping giant bomb on me."

The Doctor flashed the most grateful smile in the universe. "Thank you," he breathed. But then it was too much. He exploded into golden light and energy.

David recoiled, stepping back instinctively for his own protection and holding out his hands to shield his eyes. He could only imagine how painful the actual process was, and hoped it would end soon.

He wasn't sure when, but the light finally faded. He dropped his hands to see, and then his face slackened.

"Hello."

Where the Doctor stood before, there was someone entirely different. Much more different than David was expecting given the pictures of his friend's former selves.

And the person standing there, wearing the Ninth Doctor's clothing, heard it. "What?! My voice! It's higher-pitched, and sounds a bit rougher than it was. And why's my clothing so tight now, especially the trousers?! What's this extra weight on my chest?" A gasp exploded. "Oh my god! Boobs! I've got boobs! And they're huge!"

David's eyes nearly popped out when the woman grabbed her chest through the clothing and weighed the new... features. He could only manage one thought: What the hell?!

"Oh I always knew that gender-flipping was possible. Just thought that since I hadn't in all these years that I wouldn't be one of those cases. Ooh, damn, I have to get a whole new wardrobe! I know none of my companions were this size, and none of my past selves' clothing would fit me! Well, maybe some of Peri's blouses would work..."

There was absolutely nothing David could say to that. Assuming he could think enough to talk.

As the new female Tenth Doctor spoke through and shook from the shock, some of her hair fell into her face. Her rant stopped in its tracks. "What's this?" She grabbed the strands to inspect them. "Ginger." She grabbed more of her hair to double-check. "They're ginger." She squealed. "I'm ginger! At last! At long last! Oh, I can live with being a girl if I'm ginger. Eh, with this figure I'm a woman for sure!" She beamed at David, eyes gleaming with the triumph of a long desired wish coming true – however oddly.

David had to gulp. He wasn't imagining things. Now he had to wonder if he misinterpreted his youthful dreams, because now he wondered if he had them just because he was like his granddad – a bit psychic. For this wasn't the first time he'd seen this face or figure... and he wasn't anywhere near ready to face the other possibilities.

END OF BOOK ONE