I'm alive!

I can't believe how long it's been! I have no excuse, I've become the kind of fanfiction author I myself despise, please have my sincerest apologies.

Series three and particularly the astonishing beauty that was tonight's episode inspired me at last (I'm honestly so happy I started crying in my bedroom). It's only been a year and a bit! I hope that you enjoy this chapter. I am hoping to get another one up soon, but then last time I said that it took me over a year, so I don't want to build your hopes up (not that I imagine there are many of you that invested, but hey, a woman can dream right?) I'm also planning to cross post an edited version of the whole story on Ao3, there are some minor things, lazy edits from previous chapters and whatnot which I feel compelled to change but the story itself will be the same.

Anyway. Please enjoy. Sincere apologies and much love.

Phryne Fisher was a terrible influence. The absolute worst. And Jack was enjoying it far more than he ought to.

So far he had been humiliated, compromised (and somewhat aroused) by his escapades with Phryne. He should have ended it by all rights, simply kept The Book and refused to return it, save himself the shame. Yet, almost in spite of himself, Jack could not bring himself to cease their game. It was painfully obvious that Jack should not be as invested in this series of jokes as he was, much in the same way he should not have been so invested in the lady detective behind them. But when Phryne announced her vacation to Queenscliff he could not help but be disappointed at the prospect of delaying their game until her return. Well that was what Jack told himself, more truthfully Jack was disappointed at the knowledge of her absence. Phryne had become close to him, a feat not shared by many, and the honest truth was that without her he was prone to being somewhat lonely.

That was soon resolved by a convenient dead body, and Jack was only mildly disgusted with himself for being so delighted that someone had carked it.

He was packing his bags, deciding whether or not bringing his bathing suit was a good idea. On the one hand, there was the uncomfortable prospect that Phryne might watch him, but on the other hand there was the extremely appealing thought that Phryne might watch him. It was at this point when he realised he had forgotten a most crucial item, a certain book of erotica. Jack didn't have a plan for what to do with it as yet. But he was sure that an opportunity would present itself so he could get even with Phryne after that last embarrassing experience. He quickly grabbed the book which had been sitting under his other reading material on his bedside table, wrapping it in a shirt so no one would see it before tucking it safely into his bag.

As it so happened an opportunity did present itself, although not even Jack could anticipate how it would end.

The night Jack's plan came to fruition Phryne and he had organised to meet up at the Docks. He had arrived there first, and he had smelt her before he saw her, the rich scent of French perfume that was unquestionably Phryne. He spent a moment trying not to be alarmed at himself for having memorised her perfume. Though it was hardly surprising giving her tendency to stand far closer than was strictly necessary; not that Jack was complaining.

Of course complaining was exactly what he felt like doing mere moments later as he let himself follow Miss Fisher by dropping into the ocean. Hats, shoes and overcoats, he established, were not ideal items to be wearing in the water. Phryne and he swam and trudged their way back into shore. Their clothes ladened them down, slowing their progress, until they finally dragged themselves onto the beach, panting slightly with exertion.

As soon as Phryne was out of the water she walked up to the street. Unsurprisingly they were deserted at this early hour of the morning.. More surprisingly Phryne decided upon reaching solid ground, quite suddenly to strip, taking off her gloves, hat and shoes.

"We are in public Miss Fisher" He commented

"It's nearly four in the morning Jack, who's going to be watching?"

She continued to undress, peeling off her overcoat and shirt, leaving her standing only in her thin camisole and trousers. Items which in their sodden state had stuck to her body and were leaving nothing to Jack's imagination (an imagination which was more vivid than he cared to admit).

Jack couldn't help but stare at her figure, eyes drawing across every inch of the fabric stuck to her still wet skin. Phryne interrupted his eye's wanderings with a knowing cough. His eyes flew to hers and he tried hard not to look guilty. Phryne raised an eyebrow at him and gathered her soaking clothes into her arms.

"Are you planning on wearing those sodden clothes all the way to the Mcnaster's Jack?" She asked cheekily.

Jack swallowed nervously before bending over and pulling off his shoes and socks. He returned to standing, quite content to leave it at that. Phryne gave him a questioning look. He sighed a little then began peeling off his overcoat, jacket, tie and waistcoat feeling particularly vulnerable as Phryne watched on with a small grin. He decided to leave his shirt on, though he conceded to attempt to roll up the sleeves. Phryne looked quite satisfied with herself.

"Well Miss Fisher." Jack said at last desperate to break the silence which had formed whilst he removed his clothing. "Whilst effective, not one of your best escape plans."

"Oh Jack" She said stepping closer and letting her eyes flicker over his form "I don't know if I would say that."

Despite the cold Jack felt a flush rise to his cheeks. "Well…we should get you home before someone notices your absence."

"You make it sound like we're doing something inappropriate Jack" She said flirtatiously.

"Not at all Miss Fisher, but I do fear that your aunt or host would be quite unimpressed to find you gone from your bed first thing of a morning."

"And what if they are?" She asked with a grin as she led the way back to the house. "I'm not some rebellious youth out for a late night dalliance. I'm a grown woman doing my job. They can respect that." She asserted. "Although even if it was the latter," she said her eyes sliding to meet Jack's before smiling, "I can't say I'd care anyway."

"No, I can't imagine you would." Jack agreed.

They walked for about fifteen minutes discussing what they could of the case before finally arriving at the Mcnaster's.

"Right, I'll see you in the morning Miss Fisher…well later this morning anyway."

"Jack, what are you going to do with your clothes?"

"Pardon?"

"Come inside, Mr Butler can clean them properly, lord knows I would hate for the salt to damage your signature coat." She said grabbing his wrist and virtually dragging him through the door.

"Very well Miss Fisher."

He was stopped by Phryne pressing a finger to her lips.

"As much as I don't care what they think about me sneaking out." She whispered leaning close "It is impolite to wake someone sneaking in in the middle of the night."

"You know this from experience?" Jack asked, a tinge of smugness in his voice and the corner of his lips curled up.

Phryne gave a small shrug and grinned a bit before guiding him down the hallway and up the stairs.

"Where are we going Phryne?"

"We can dump the things in my bedroom…I don't know where the laundry is."

"Of course." Jack muttered to himself.

They walked into her bedroom not even bothering to switch on the light but allowing the moons gentle glow to faintly illuminate the space. They went and quickly discarded the still wet clothing in her en suite. Jack began to head out when suddenly Phryne's hands were holding him back. Jack tried to ignore the feel of her skin on is and focus on the task at hand, a feat more difficult than it sounded.

"What is it?" He asked

"Somethings wrong?" She muttered.

"What?"

"That isn't the way I left my bed Jack."

"What do you mean?"

"Mr Butler never folds the sheets that way, and look at the pillows, he's immaculate in his bed making."

Jack's brow furrowed. "Maybe he was just tired? When was the last time you were in the room.

Phryne thought back. "This evening, maybe six, you were still here, I went up to get my things together, I came back down and when I wanted to go to bed I slept downstairs on the couch so I didn't disturb anyone while I left."

"Did you have any valuables with you?"

Phryne saw where he was headed with the proposition. "You think it might be the thief who took the doubloon?"

At that moment there was a faint creek from the hallway outside. Jack and Phryne looked at each other.

"What if he's still here?" Phryne whispered.

"Check under the sheets Miss Fisher." Jack murmured "I'll see if anything else looks disturbed," he said. "Don't want to go waking up the house if it is just a coincidence.

Phryne moved away from him and went to rummage under her pillows and sheets. Meanwhile more creaking could be heard in the corridor. Phryne could feel her heart beating in her chest, what if the thief was here? And she was sure those creaks were getting noisier- someone getting closer perhaps. She continued to feel around, but there was nothing but smooth linen under her fingers until suddenly her hands came across a shape, something firm. She tentatively grasped it. She pulled it out from under the covers, her heart still racing, the creaking still getting louder. It appeared to be a book, she couldn't properly make out the title in the light, she squinted hard trying to read it. It looked familiar.

The revelation hit her suddenly her eyes widened.

"Boo!"

A voice mere centimetres from her ear called, a split second after her realisation.

Phryne jumped around startled, letting out a small cry, The Book flew from her hands and landed near the door. In her fright Phryne reached out for Jack, one hand grabbed his arm, her other hand reaching out and clasping his. Jack found his own hands instinctively responding by grabbing her waist.

Phryne's mouth was virtually on the floor and she was breathing heavily after the shock and Jack couldn't help but burst out laughing. At the sound of Jack's laughter, a rare occasion indeed Phryne couldn't help but break out into laughter herself. They stood like that for a moment grinning madly at each other. That was until the bedroom light suddenly switched on.

Phryne and Jack leapt away from each other to where a rather traumatised looking Kip was standing at the door, a book of erotica at his feet; one which he was trying, (and failing) not to look at. The poor boy didn't know where to direct his gaze; his eyes were darting between its sensual cover and the soaking wet, half undressed couple before him.

He stood there gaping like a fish for a moment before finally speaking "…I…I heard someone come in, I was suspicious…I uh…I'm sorry. I'm going to go…I'm sorry" He said before virtually running out the door.

Jack barely had the time to call out "It's not what it looks like!" But it was no use, the boy had gone.

He turned to Phryne, who had her usual smirk on her face. "What does it look like Jack?" She teased.

"I feel like you know the answer to that better than I do." Jack jabbed.

Phryne laughed. "I feel like it looks like two very handsome people, in the midst of undressing, soaking wet, almost in each other's arms, with a discarded book of erotica a meter away from them." Phryne taunted stepping closer. "All sounds perfectly innocent to me." She grinned. "I don't know what you were fantasising that situation would lead to Jack." She said. Her body absurdly close to his.

Jack merely raised his eyebrows at her before pulling away. Phryne chuckled before going to pick up the book.

"Okay, so I think I have this figured out." Phryne said turning to Jack who was still standing in her room hands in his pockets.

"Well you obviously hid the book in my room sometime before you left this evening, knowing that we would be meeting in the very early morning. Fortuitously for you I did not return to my Boudoir. Then leaping upon opportunity like I never thought you were capable of, you managed to help me find the book and frighten me at the same time."

"That's pretty much it."

Phryne grinned. "You win this round Jack."

Jack grinned. "It was unfortunate that I traumatised poor Kip in the process." He mentioned.

Phryne shrugged. "Could've been worse, could you imagine if it was Mrs Mcnaster?"

"Or your aunt." Jack commented. Both giggled a little at the thought. Until another creak in the hallway broke their reverie.

"Phryne!" A voice called out.

"Oh god! Speak of the devil. It's Aunt P." Phryne muttered, "Quick, hide!" She said chasing Jack round to lie on the floor behind her bed mere seconds before Aunt P entered the room. Phryne desperately hiding the book behind her back.

"Phryne! What on earth are you doing?" Aunt P said walking into the room. "It's past four in the morning, there was such a ruckus in here I could've sworn I heard laughter." She said "I hope you aren't entertaining one of your…male guests while you yourself are a guest at dear Tilly's house."

"Oh no Aunt P." Phryne insisted stepping forward as Aunt P looked around suspiciously. "I've been solving a murder; I haven't had time for wooing." She stated simply.

"Not even your Inspector?"

Jack from his position behind the bed felt all of the colour drain from his face.

"I don't know what gave you that idea aunt P." Phryne said, possibly a little too quickly. "and besides his not…he's not my inspector." She added.

"Hmmm." Prudence merely hummed. She stopped suddenly. "Phryne…why on gods earth are you wet. And dressed!"

Phryne looked speechless for once. "I uh…" She thought desperately of a way to not reveal that she had been with the inspector. "I couldn't sleep…so I went down to the waterfront and I was walking along the sand...dipping my toes in the water, you know Aunt P. Anyway there was a ditch, what with is being dark I couldn't see and I…I fell in."

"You fell in."

"Yes that's right." Phryne affirmed. "But my walking did quite tire me out so I'm going to go to bed now." She said faking a yawn. "Sorry to wake you Aunt Prudence."

Prudence grimaced a bit. "It's quite alright Phryne," she said, not particularly believably. "Now get some sleep." She said before leaving and closing the door behind her.

Phryne released a breath she didn't realise she had been holding. She turned and crawled across the bed, peering over the side where Jack was laying on his back on the floor. She looked at him and grinned.

"That was close." She said

Jack nodded and exhaled heavily. "Um…Miss Fisher," He began trying to work up some confidence, "does everyone in your life think of me as your inspector?"

Phryne bit her lip "only the ones who think we're sleeping together." She admitted a little sheepishly. Though only a little sheepishly, because Phryne Fisher was never really embarrassed.

"And how many people would that be?" Jack asked, feeling once again vulnerable as he lay there sprawled out under her gaze, though he couldn't bring himself to move.

"Um…virtually everyone."

"Right." He paused and contemplated this revelation, unsure if he was mortified or utterly delighted. "It's a good thing you're so good at making up excuses then isn't." He said a little smugly recalling how Phryne had floundered for an alibi for her dripping clothing.

Jack raised himself up till he was reclining on his elbows. "Forgive me Miss Fisher but what was that you said earlier tonight…something about "not caring anyway" what your household thought of your dalliances." He said a smug grin tugging at his lips.

Phryne raised an eyebrow at him and did her best to look unimpressed.

"Well I don't care, usually, but there are some occasions where it is just easier to lie. And besides, I wouldn't want to besmirch your shining reputation now would I?"

"Wouldn't you?" Jack asked

Phryne gazed at him. "Well" she drawled. "It would depend on how I was besmirching it." She said with an almost predatory smile.

Jack swallowed hard and quickly stood up. They were heading to dangerous territory (Well truthfully they had crossed into dangerous territory the moment they plunged into the water together, but even Jack had his limits.)

"I should be going, it's late."

"It's early" Phryne stated

"I'll see you soon Miss Fisher." He said moving towards the door. "Probably…four hours from now in fact."

"Hardly seems worth leaving." She proposed staring at him sincerely.

Jack looked at her solemnly for a moment, his mouth slightly agape. "Well, if I don't get a good night's rest I won't be able to think to solve our murder mystery. And I hardly feel I could sleep whilst in the presence of such engaging company." He said, trying his hardest not to make it sound like an innuendo. He failed.

"Until five hours then Jack." Phryne said with a small smile. "Or until I return this." She said with a grin holding up the book.

"I look forward to it."

"Goodnight Jack."

"Goodnight Miss Fisher." He said closing the door behind him as he left.

His skin still tingled from the anticipation of what might've been, even as the door closed with a comforting click. Jack leant against a wall and took a few deep breaths. He found himself suddenly feeling in great need of another dip, preferably in cold water.

Please review and let me know your thoughts.