A Challenge from:

http://members.aol.com/slaythis99/challenge.html

Okay, it's time for the Slay This monthly challenge for December. It's taken me awhile to get this going but here are the requirements: *It must have a canon coupling as the main couple. Canon couples are Buffy/Angel, Willow/Oz, Xander/Cordelia, Giles/Jenny and Spike/Drusilla. You can also do Angelus/Drusilla, but I won't like you very much.
*An AU couple must be mentioned but doesn't actually have to be in the fic. It can be as simple as.... "I never tried tofu!" Angel insisted. "Yes you did!" Buffy kept on. "Remember that night when we had dinner with Spike and Cordy?" *You need to use at least three lines from any song. I don't care the origin or the artist, whether you put it at the beginning, the end or the middle of the fic, I just want lyrics. I love songfics.

*Spike must be mentioned, but he doesn't need to be alive. I mean, undead. I mean....I don't know what I mean, I hope you do.

*NO mention of Riley or Kate allowed.

*Characters from ANGEL can be in the fic but this must be set in Sunnydale with a Buffy-based storyline. *No smut!! I'm not in the mood.

*You must included at least five of the following things. The more you use, the more I'll like.

--Hostess Cupcakes

--A nail file

--A broken latte mug

--Someone mentioning Dawson's Creek

--Someone watching porn

--A wand that looks like a child's toy

--A pregnancy

--Thumbtacks

--A comment about how strange someone's name is

--A snag in someone's nylons

--Milky Ways

--A pen that says "Do I make you horny, baby?" in Austin Powers' voice

--A messy bedroom

--Sweat socks

--A reference to the occurances in Earshot

--Xander saying, "Yo Quiero slay some vamps."

--Someone stepping on a CD and breaking it in half

--Someone having their horoscope read to them/reading their own aloud

--A Barbie doll

--A movie ticket stub

--A beach ball

--The line "God, if you start smoking again, I'll stake you myself."

--Someone reading FHM magazine.

--Unlit candles

--Xander having sex (come on guys, let the poor boy get some!)

--Someone humming the theme to Melrose Place

Spring Cleaning

A Buffy Challenge Fic by Celtic Air ~Janet~

"Remind me again why I agreed to do this?," Cordelia questioned after receiving a run in her nylons from bumping into Willow's dresser. The bedroom was a pigsty, to put it bluntly, but that was only because the Scooby Gang's favorite net girl had been busy the past couple of weeks with important demon researching, plus senior year final in school.

"Because you had a moment of kindness," Xander sarcastically replied from Willow's bed, he was busy eating a Milky Way and thumbing through one of his FHM magazines. "I guess your moment didn't last long enough."

Willow sighed as she picked up a broken latte mug from behind her bed, and threw it in the garbage. It had been one of her mother's expensive mugs; she could feel the trouble coming already. "Giles needs that book so that we can help Buffy. I borrowed it for a spell... I didn't mean to lose it." Another thing she could be blamed for.

"And where is Buffy? I mean, she's the one who need the book, for her whole slaying gig, she should help," Cordelia complained.

"Her and Spike are either fighting or having fun making up," Willow smiled impishly.

"I didn't know the two love birds were fighting? Trouble in paradise?" Xander smirked, putting the magazine back in his bookbag.

"Yeah. Buffy didn't want him smoking again. The other day she told him, exact words: 'God, if you start smoking again, I'll stake you myself'... they were mad at each other yesterday, but I think they patched things up," Willow explained. She put some of the candles that had rolled under her bed onto her dresser, next to a movie ticket stub from "Titanic". It was the first movie her and Oz had seen together, and the ticket was a momento she would always keep.

An almost inaudible "Ow" came from near the closet, where Oz was standing. Willow looked up as Oz pulled out a small thumbtack from his foot.

"You, okay?" Willow asked her boyfriend.

Oz smiled at her, "Yep."

Willow grinned back at him. He was unfazed as usual; she liked him that way. He was so different from Xander, in their approach to life. Even when Willow had thought she would never feel for a guy the same way she felt about Xander, Oz had come along and surprised her, like he had a habit of doing.

Xander had finished his Milky Way and was about to get up and start actually doing some work, when Cordelia plopped down on the bed next to him. "Don't you have maids to do this type of thing for you Willow?"

"Not every one is as lazy as you." Xander said, his voice full of mocking.

"Lazy?" Cordy turned to him, indignant, "You haven't done anything, and you're calling me lazy?"

"I had to fuel up first," Xander pointed to the Milky Way wrapper that sat on top of the garbage pail, "Now I'm ready to get down and start this funky cleaning machine."

Willow laughed as she threw some sweat socks into her laundry pile. Cordelia just sighed, wondering why she had ended up with a freak for a boyfriend. She pulled out her trusty nail file and began working on her nails.

"Ok, let's find that spell book," Xander added, as he made his way over to the TV stand. He opened it and started going through the contents; blank tapes, a photograph and an old newspaper. "I found your porn tapes, I found your porn tapes." Xander told Willow in a sing-song voice. He received looks from all in the small bedroom.

"They're not porn Xander," She laughed, yet was slightly annoyed at his immaturity at the same time, "They're old episodes of 'Dawson's Creek' and some 'Melrose Place' "

"Oh, well, that can be naughty too." Starting to hum the 'Melrose Place' theme song, he pulled out the newspaper and reading the horoscopes.

Willow glanced over to him, while putting an inflated beach ball away, "Xander, why are you reading an old horoscope?"

He started at her with a 'duh!' expression on his face, "To see if it came true" He looked at the date on the front cover, "This is from the week Buffy came to Sunnydale."

"Yeah, I was probably looking in the obituaries, doing research as usual," She sighed, wondering if that was all she ever contributed to the group.

"That was the first time you saved a whole bunch of people with your research," Oz brightened her spirits by complimenting her.

"Well, not a 'whole bunch'," Willow said, at first just to be modest but then she was reminded of Jesse, one of her best friends none of them had been able to save.

Xander spoke up, reading the horoscope, " 'Unexpected life changes will happen to you when a new member of the opposite sex enters your life'. Wow. They were right! - - Who knew that a Buffy would come to town and announce 'Yo Quiero slay some vamps.'" He reflected for a moment on the 'unexpected life changes' he had witnessed. Three years ago he would have bet his life that vampires were fake, now he was betting his life because vampires were real.

Willow picked up a wiccan wand from the floor. It was the first one she had ever made and because of her inexperience it looked just like a child's toy.

"Wow, Melissa went and got pregnant?" Xander stared in disbelief at the photograph he had found. He still envied the guy who had married Melissa, Willow's twenty-year-old cousin. Ever since he got into the 'horny' dating stage of his life, he had liked Melissa, really really liked her.

Suddenly, there was a crash, as Oz opened the closet doors. A whole bunch of Willow's things she had stuffed into the closet came flooding out; a few board games, some boxes of summer clothes, a school project, and a really old Barbie doll. Oz fell unconscious to the floor after getting his on the head by a heavy board game. The three other teenagers rushed to his side.

"Oh, Oz," Willow kissed the bump on his head. "Are you all right?"

"I've been better, but I've been worse." He grimaced as he opened his eyes, still lying on the floor.

"This is Sunnydale - everyone's been worse," Cordelia said bluntly. Accidentally, she stepped on a CD that was in the mess of things that had fallen out of the closet. "I'll pay for that." She apologized, without saying she was sorry.
Willow bent down and picked up the CD, reading the title, "That's okay, Cordelia. I don't think I really listen to my Sesame Street soundtrack anymore." She threw the old, almost ancient, CD out in the garbage.

"Hey!" Xander reached down, grabbing the Barbie doll. "I told you I didn't steal your Barbie."

"I guess it's been in my closet since we were 5," Willow said as she helped Oz up, "I've never really cleaned up in there."

"And you blamed me," Xander said pretending to be hurt.

"I'm sorry, Xander," Willow replied, her voice full of real emotion. Willow followed Oz as he went to go sit on Willow's bed, taking a break from cleaning. Willow sat next to him, happily in her boyfriend's arms.

Xander moved over to the computer desk, getting down to work again. He found an Austin Power's pen he had given Willow for her last birthday. He walked over to Cordy, nonchalantly and placed it next to her ear; "Do I make you horny, baby?" the pen spoke with Austin Power's voice.

"Yeah right," Cordelia replied to Xander.

He shook his head, "That's not what he said last night."

"Is that all you ever think about?" Cordelia asked her misguided boyfriend.

"Pretty much." He went to go put the pen back on the desk.

Cordelia moved towards the CD player, "Hey, Willow, can I put on some music."

"As long as you promise not to break any more CDs." Willow smirked.

Cordelia found a Meredith Brooks CD on the floor, close to the disc player. Taking it after the case, she put it into the machine. The song 'Bitch' started.

"I hate the world today,
You're so good to me,
I know, but I can't change,
Tried to tell you,
But you look at me like maybe,
I'm an angel underneath,
Innocent and sweet,"

"They're playing you're song." Xander slyly commented.

Cordelia grinned, knowing it was true, but still not caring.

"Yesterday I cried,
must have been relieved to see,
softer side,"

Willow got up off her bed, "We're never going to get my room cleaned, or find the spell book are we?" She smirked, maybe not, but she was having fun with her friends, and her life was not in danger for once, life was good.
Oz got up off the bed after her, ready to give a helping hand to her girlfriend.

A few hours passed, as the four friends cleaned the bedroom up. After a long time and a lot of hard work, the place was spotless. They sat in a circle on the floor, exhausted. They were almost delirious with tiredness. Xander retrieved a Hostess cupcake from his backpack.

"Hey!" Willow said, pouting.

"What?"

"I want one." She pointed to the cupcake.

Xander reached back into his school bag and pulled out another cupcake, for his best friend, "Well, then say something. How can I read your mind, Will, only Buffy has that power." He refereed to an incident that had happened a few weeks ago when Buffy had been able to read minds for a day.

Willow was in one of her strange moods, curiously she spoke the only thing on her mind, "Why do we all have weird names?"

"I don't have a weird name." Cordelia spoke slightly defensive.

"I've never met anyone else with the name 'Cordelia'," Xander replied. "One of a kind."

"Like 'Xander' is normal?" His girlfriend debated.

"I like it. It's different." Alexander said proudly. "That's why I changed it."

"Freak." Cordelia responded.

"'Oz' is semi weird." Oz added his two cents.

Xander mused, "And 'Willow' is too. Okay, so we all have weird, odd, peculiar names. We're a weird, odd, peculiar bunch, so it fits."

Willow grinned at him; they were indeed.

The four friends sat in comfortable silence, until Cordelia spoke, "So, this was all for nothing? We didn't find the book."

"Giles is going to be mad, he lent it to me and trusted it to me. Now I can't even find it."
The phone rang from on top of Willow's dresser. She stood up to get it, picked it up and placed it next to her ear.

"Oh, Hi Giles.... No... Right..." She smiled happily. "Good. Yeah, thanks. See you tomorrow at school, bye."
The trio looked at her. "What happened?" Oz asked.

Willow laughed at the irony of the situation as she collapsed in fatigue on the floor, "The book was at Giles' house. I must have already returned it to him."

The others laughed, and moaned at the same time. Xander took a small pillow from off the bed and threw it at Willow's head.

~THE END~