Author note: I have decided to split this chapter for space control. Therefore, there will be a final after this… sorry.

Disclaimer: I own this story but the only profit was the joy it brought me to write, and to know that others enjoyed it too. Lizzie is my exclusive property as well as a few OC's, like Nathaniel's son, Cain, Diana, and the cross over characters from Awakening. I could not resist a friendship between my Alexi and Nathaniel.

Chapter start

It had all started a few years ago. Hell, Nathaniel could even name the date. After his final encounter with Lizzie, he had thrown himself into work, college, and his marriage. He could claim content, if not outright happiness.

He and Melody had settled into a pleasant but passionless marriage. Rather then seeming like a young couple, they were more like comfortable old partners, who had lived lifetimes together and set in their ways. Now they were at total ends of the spectrum from each other, Cain a thin tie between them. Even that was fraying, as she became less and less slick of her resentment to a son who had stalled her career.

"That's a miserable metaphor," Alexi said lightly.

Nathaniel sighed. "And that is a horrible way to give advice."

Alexi shrugged neatly. As usual, he was indifferent to the sting his words could, and usually would, cause.

"You know my opinion. You and that girl never should have gotten married, that was your first mistake. Your second was not ending it the first time you met Lizzie again. Now look where it's led to." Alexi pushed his tea away. "I think fate has kicked you around enough for you to know what the real anomaly in your life was back then. And it wasn't that fluffy headed disaster that gave everyone headaches in school."

Nathaniel grimaced; Lizzie had been exceptionally good at that. He still felt the pang of a headache when he thought of her pranks. It wasn't too hard to see that mischievous girl in the woman she had become. Of course, the latest discourse in his life was she, as usual.

It had started a year after that fateful Christmas Eve. Nathaniel was working as a fulltime editor now. He had been shocked when he had been given a new client, named Diana Steele. Of course, interaction with her was limited; her partner was present in all transactions concerning the novel Miss Steele was hoping to publish, even to the point of putting her own career as a freelance photographer on hold.

"Quite the fairytale relationship these two have." Nathaniel's boss was raving to him, yet again. "Both free as birds and yet still so happy with each other. One a painter, hoping to turn novelist and the other a rather well known photographer."

At the time, Nathaniel had not met either so he was rather dry. "Hopefully this one actually knows how to piece together a sentence every other paragraph."

His boss clapped him on the back knowingly. Both knew the pains of the job, and the satisfaction of correcting them. He led Nathaniel inside his office and Nathaniel felt as though he had been punched.

Her hair was down with strands braided in the front. The smile slipped a little when she registered him, but then it became the pleasant one of a stranger, her eyes vague. To ground himself he glanced at her companion.

Diana Steele had typical red hair, along with a shocking strand of bubblegum pink styled into her bangs that curved her right cheek and into her hair. Her green eyes were full of curiosity, and if she recognized him at all, she showed no sign. Not surprising. They had met maybe twice for a total of two minutes, spoken simple sentences. He hadn't sensed a threat then. Yet this woman had helped steal his girlfriend.

If she had not of been then maybe Lizzie would have talked to him instead of falling on her old habit of running.

His boss had been speaking. "-the best of all my editors. I fully expect someone to come snatch him up with a better job because of his talents. He even has a major in business he got for 'fun'. Hah!"

"A valid fear, I'm sure." Lizzie had risen and was offering her hand. "Nice to meet you again."

"Again?" Diana was up now too, offering her hand, which he shook with a firm grip, trying to keep the natural dislike off his face.

"An old classmate," Lizzie said smoothly. She laughed a little and dropped her arm around Diana's shoulders casually. "I gave him plenty of trouble!"

Diana gave her a look. "I can believe that!"

The easy familiarity between them was aching. Nathaniel closed his eyes against it. Pushing through it, he stepped forward and took his place at the desk.

It was fine until later. Melody asked him how his day had been. Casually, without thinking about it, he mentioned meeting Lizzie and her partner, that he had been hired as Miss Steele's personal editor. Melody had immediately flown off the handle. He had been accused of infidelity; she claimed that they were up to something together. Nathaniel had listened with a growing pit of unease. Had his wife always been so vulnerable to succumbing to her minds fantasies?

However, when she brought Cain into it, the four year old in listening distance since he was in the living room, he quickly sliced through her tirade. It was better to get her before she hit that particular swing, otherwise she would be upset for the remainder of the waking day.

Several weeks later, Nathaniel was drinking a cup of coffee in the office lounge when Lizzie breezed in, waiting for Diana to finish something. They sat in silence but it wasn't tense at all and the blond smiled politely when Nathaniel said good-bye as she left with the shorter woman. They gradually began to make small talk after a few more coincidental meetings. The small talk slowly turned to more in depth conversations and Nathaniel soon found more pleasure in a chat with Lizzie than a night at home with Melody.

Nathaniel was not the same man he had been back then, when he easily succumbed to his bodies wants, however. He wanted his marriage to work so, realizing that this wasn't a good sign, he paid more attention to Melody. He invited her to visit him at the office so they could lunch together and began making more of an effort at home, but she just accused him of cheating and trying to buy her forgiveness. He tried explaining that he felt the life going out of their marriage but she refused to hear him out.

He remembered the conversations with Lizzie in fondness and snapped at Melody one day that his former girlfriend seemed more inclined to listen to him than she did. Seeing her wide-eyed stare and gaping mouth, Nathaniel quickly apologized but knew the words couldn't be unsaid, and it pained him that he had said it. Melody then started verbally comparing herself to Lizzie at every turn.

"I'll bet Lizzie wouldn't cook you a dinner like this!" She had said one day.

Another time, she had massaged his neck and shoulders to help get rid of a tension headache, but a dig that Lizzie would not have done something like that for him closely followed it. He'd had to bite his tongue to keep from telling her she had ruined the experience.

The comments soon became ridiculous as she asked if she should dye her hair blonde, or would Lizzie look as nice in one of her dresses, if the blonde-haired woman had even learned to dress, since in school she had been less than skilled at it. All Nathaniel could do was sigh and shake his head although it did put interesting images in his head.

He tried initiating sex once to work off some of their mutual tension but while she was going down on him, one of her comments became a vision. Instead of brown hair, it was blond locks Nathaniel gripped, and the lips were thinner and pink, instead of pouty and red. He came hard before uneasily giving her the climax she needed.

Once she had drifted off to sleep, Nathaniel found himself analyzing his recent thoughts and actions. He got up and paced the house, thinking. He loved his child. He loved his wife for giving him his child but he hated the way Melody was acting. In truth, he had issues with her beyond these last weeks but he had pushed them aside as unimportant. Now he had to face admitting it all aloud and he wasn't sure how to explain she was driving him farther away.

He decided brutal honesty was the way. After dinner, he saw Cain off to his parents' house for the weekend and sat Melody down in a chair. "We need to talk."

She would have gotten up but he pushed her back down gently and then kneeled by her feet.

"No. I listened to you when you were spouting all of those stupid things, so now you need to listen to me." Nathaniel gave her a beseeching look. "Melody, I love you. I am trying to make this work but you are going off at the mouth about a woman in my past! Your ridiculous comments actually had me picturing Lizzie sucking me off the other night – and you know what? It was a pretty fucking picture!"

She was pale as she stared up at him.

He caught his breath and calmed himself before continuing. "Your nonsensical ramblings are driving me crazy and if you can't stop I'll end up in some insane asylum."

Melody was biting her lip but she sighed, eyes swimming with tears.

"I'm sorry. I'll stop." She told him solemnly. She did for a while and things settled again in his family.

When they started up again, this time over other women that he couldn't deny looking at, Nathaniel decided to move to the guest bedroom. He went home that very night, packed up everything he owned from the master bedroom and placed it in the guest room, but when he returned from work the next night, he found all of his belongings moved to their original places. Therefore, Nathaniel repeated his previous work and frowned as he placed a lock on the door, pocketing the key.

They reached the obvious agreement of couples counseling. They went weekly and one of them usually ended up storming out, Melody usually a bundle of frayed nerves and hysterical insults, Nathaniel usually outwardly calm with only his aura and a muscle twitch in his cheek showing his emotions.

Things stayed that way for quite a few months. Nathaniel tried desperately to stop thinking about anything, especially the fact he was out of love with his wife. He found himself looking at other women and their mouths, their bodies…their asses. He hardly ever even thought of Melody in a sexual way anymore but it took several more weeks that were filled with confusion and self discovery before he confessed to his closest friend, Alexi, that he was indeed done.

Without missing a beat, Alexi fixed some coffee and asked how Melody was taking the news.

"How did all this happen," Nathaniel asked himself. Alexi set his cup on the table. Royce, Alexi's partner was biting his lip to keep from spouting something ridiculous.

"It happened thanks to coincidences, mistakes, and an unhealthy dose of bad luck on all your parts," Royce said finally.

"I have to tell her." Nathaniel knew it was the right thing to do, but he had hurt her already. There was nothing in him that wanted to do it more. The rational part of him knew not telling her might hurt her further but…

Within days of that discussion, Nathaniel sat Melody down again. It was decided that divorce was really the only option. They bickered constantly and sought out lawyers. They agreed that he could continue living at the house until he found a new one but papers were drawn up, waiting her signature. Nathaniel's lawyer revised and offered them to his hotheaded wife every few weeks but she dismissed them each time, always finding something to pick at.

Nathaniel spent his time arguing with her while she tried to ignore the divorce, acting as if they were still fine. He also assured Cain that the going on had nothing at all to do with him, that both his parents still loved him immensely, that this was all Nathaniel's fault.

He dated tentatively. Though he never did more than kiss them, they weren't who he really wanted and he didn't desire another Melody situation.

Weeks turned into months and, while he did continue working with Diana and talking with Lizzie, he made an effort to think of the blond in friendly terms. However, they never asked for any major details from each other's lives. Lizzie looked merely vague when his coworkers brought up his divorce around her.

Time flew and soon it was time to celebrate the successful publishing of Diana Steele's first novel titled, appropriately, 'Bent Thinking'.

"Did you see Lizzie's date?" Roger, Nathaniel's boss asked while they talked near the bar at the party. "The guy…Well, I'm not gay but he's pretty easy on the eyes!"

"Lizzie's with a guy? Wait, what about Diana?" Nathaniel asked, looking around startled. "Wait, what?"

"Didn't you know they weren't together?" Roger's expression was one of open shock. "They've never hidden the fact they're seeing others. However, I guess they weren't open about it either."

Nathaniel watched Lizzie from afar that night. The blond danced very beautifully even when the tune was lively rather than slow. She received good treatment from her date, though Nathaniel thought the man should have sat closer while at the table and held Lizzie more tenderly while slow dancing. He thought perhaps this must be among their first few dates and maybe they just didn't know each other very well yet.

"You ought to watch that, son. The expression you're using to watch another man's date…It could get you in trouble." Roger smirked. "With more than just your wife, too!"

Nathaniel grimaced and shook his head. "I'm aware. I didn't mean to draw attention to myself."

"Nonsense! Why not just go over there? She is a former classmate isn't she?"

"Are you actively telling me to cheat on my wife?" Nathaniel couldn't help the dry tone to his voice or the way his face stayed neutral.

Rogers shook his head, eyes a little saddened. "Come now. It's only your wife who thinks you have a marriage."

"It isn't her fault."

"But she didn't help matters, from what I understand?"

It took some persuading but eventually Nathaniel did wander over. He got lucky that Lizzie's date was heading to the restroom. He paused by the bored woman and she glanced at him.

"Are you having a good time," he asked.

"Not bad… but I've definitely had better times." Lizzie had turned into quite the honest person, her humor warm, her personality still sassy when she had to be.

"Yeah… this may be sudden but would you like to dance?"

Cerulean eyes had been perusing the floor but now they swung to regard Nathaniel thoughtfully. He almost stopped breathing, but thought Lizzie would let him suffocate by accident or intent, so settled for slow and even breaths instead.

After a moment, Lizzie nodded and held out a hand so Nathaniel could help her up.

Nathaniel moved to the floor and pulled Lizzie in close to his chest as they joined the group during a song with a slow tempo. He had learned to dance to avoid embarrassment among his coworkers but he found he also enjoyed it.

Lizzie remained quiet for a moment. However, she had something to say, smiling a little, head tilted cutely. "I can't figure out if you're doing this because I'm a friend who doesn't seem to be having a very good time at a party or if you have other reasons. I'm usually pretty good at reading others but I'm having trouble with you."

Nathaniel nervously chewed his lip. "Would you believe me if I said 'both'?"

A familiar smile tilted her lips and Nathaniel felt a familiar pound from his chest. "Really, Natty. Even now you worry about me."

Nathaniel said how sorry he was about Lizzie and Diana, wondering privately how they could be so close seeming still. Lizzie made non-committal sounds here and there until the next confession. "I wish I'd known… or this might not be our first dance."

Lizzie's eyes once again focused on him. "Known? What didn't you know?"

"We're both single now…" Nathaniel murmured. "Well, I still have a wife but it is over. Only her signature…"

"Well, I wasn't hiding that." Lizzie frowned. "I thought you knew. Everybody knows. Diana and I are simply terrific friends. It was never loving for us just… comfort, I suppose."

"You were engaged, weren't you?"

Lizzie shrugged as he turned her gracefully. When he remained silent, she sighed. "If you must know, after our 'misunderstanding' I couldn't stomach the idea of a man. It wasn't until Diana herself set me down and had a talk with me that I admitted to lying to myself. And to her, for years." She grinned a little self-deprecatingly. "Be proud, Natty. I've finally grown up."

"I can see that," he murmured. "Every time I see you after a separation you seem to turn bigger than my old image of you can hold. So if you can't stomach a man, who is your date?"

"You too," she agreed with a laugh. "Diana's brother, actually. He has had a bit of a thing for me. I wanted to nip it, to my failure."

"You're a very hard one to get over. Especially when you have your wife whispering constantly about it…"

At Lizzie's curious expression, he realized he had said the words aloud and flushed. Sighing, he glossed over the way of his divorce, the start of it and the end he was trying to lead it to. She raised her brows at his description of her former rival's behavior.

"I thought she was so much more secure, back then. She annoyed me to death but…"

"Lizzie! Listen… I know we have both changed since school. And even more since that Christmas Eve. But, would you… I shouldn't be asking when you're on a date with someone else, yet…"

What was it about her that turned him into a clumsy adolescent? Soon he would revert to sweating and stuttering, like a schoolchild with his first crush.

Her eyes were sparkling. "Spit it out, Natty-catty." Deliberately twisting the knife!

He gave her a small reproachful look. Soon it cracked and they both laughed, Lizzie falling a little to laugh against his shoulder. He found his hand moving up to her neck to tug a tendril of hair that had fallen from the loose style.

"Would you be interested in drinks, or dinner sometime?"

Lizzie swatted his hand away from her hair, tilting her head, as if she was thinking deeply. Then she smiled. "Pick a day and time. I get to pick the place, though."

Of course, the moment Melody discovered it, she was furious. She had been argumentative, storming into his room where he got ready. Nathaniel had handed her the divorce papers again, stating his arguments firmly.

Melody glared. "I know what this is. A midlife crisis," She spat. "But don't think I'll take you back when you figure it out! You can have all the fun you want with that… that slut of yours-"

Nathaniel grabbed her hand when she swung at him. They struggled until he deposited her onto the couch irritably, his hair mussed, shirt now wrinkled.

"Get a hold of yourself!" He said with a sigh. He raked a hand through his hair. "This isn't you, Melody. You have rarely ever even cussed, so please, stop this. Where is the reasonable woman, the calm, gentle woman I married? Where is 'Melody the childhood friend'?"

"I'm aware," she murmured. She leaned back and covered her face. "Let me ask a question. Where is 'Nathaniel the boy I loved'? I don't recognize the man he's become."

"And you don't love who I've become anymore than I love you." Melody gave him a vague look. He shook his head. "I understand you being afraid to let go. I was too, for so long I was. We didn't do anything wrong Melody, we tried. It just was not meant to be. Sign the papers, please. Let us both have a chance at real happiness."

She glanced at them. Her eyes focused on something. "I've told you this isn't enough to live on! And here… there isn't even a provision for me to live on!"

Nathaniel sighed, knowing the money he would be settling on her had been raised several times. "If you recall you want me to be the main custodian of Cain, meaning he will live with me most of the year, I'll pay for his schooling. I am not even asking for help with that, just that you will continue to be a presence in his life. You only get child support if you have full custody, which you do not want. This is half my savings account you will be getting, and that is all you need. You cannot expect me to be supporting your new husband, after all, any less than I would expect you to support a new wife. You get the house as well. "

"Oh, I see," Melody murmured. "Well, in any case, the cost of living goes up yearly! This still is not enough to expect me to live off. I'm still finishing my degree, if you'd bother to recall!"

Nathaniel tsked, glancing at the watch on his wrist. Great, he was late now. He swiped his hands down his front, trying to look presentable again, glaring now. "Just brilliant, Melody, I'm late now. Once again, thanks for making my life difficult."

He ignored her staring at him, demanding he return to finish their argument.

He drove to the address Lizzie gave him and knocked on her apartment door. She opened the door after a moment, poking her head out. "Ah, Natty!" She swung the door wide so he could step inside. "I thought I'd been stood up. Is it alright?"

Nathaniel waved a vague hand in dismissal. "Just the usual fight. This is a nice place."

Lizzie searched his face before smiling. "Yes, thanks."

"I'm sorry for ruining our first date."

Her grin grew. "Oh it isn't a total wash yet, Nathaniel. In fact, now we can be fashionably late. Isn't that so much better?"

It turned out to be another party, this one hosted for one of Lizzie's coworkers. Celebrating a year with the magazine Lizzie took pictures for. Nathaniel was more than content with that. Lizzie was wearing tight fitting black pants, and a white shirt under a long sleeved dark gray cashmere shrug. Her hair was down, curled slightly.

He got to do everything he had wanted to do at the last party. He kept her laughing, held her close for most of the party, joked with her and her friends easily. Much like her high school self, Lizzie was not dictated to be calm and poised. She danced around him with easy silliness.

Despite that he kept up with her and won over her friends, when one of them, he didn't know her name, turned into his arms. He let her cross his arms over her stomach and swayed with her in place, keeping Lizzie's smiling face in line as she danced against another woman. The woman he held titled her head back and then smacked him lightly, teasingly, before spinning out of his arms. He humored her before spinning her quickly three times and then lifting her into his arms, spinning himself around as well.

"Whoo!" Lizzie laughed when he set her friend down, breathless and laughing, holding her side.

"They all totally love you," she said later, as he dropped her off at her door.

When they kissed goodnight, the blond clung to him so tightly that Nathaniel felt the ground shift beneath him.

He pressed Lizzie against the wall in the hallway outside of her apartment. "Please tell me I'm not imagining this?" He whispered softly. "I can't think of anyone but you…I feel so good when I'm with you."

"I feel the same way." Lizzie bit her lip and moistened it with her tongue. "I can't tell you how much I regret…" she shook her head. "Do you want to come in?"

"I shouldn't…" Nathaniel leaned forward, kissing Lizzie deeply one more time. "I don't want a one night thing."

Lizzie smiled, battling her lashes in mock indignation. "Oh, goodness! What kind of girl do you think I am?"

Nathaniel snickered. "I'm kind of hoping you're the type who is actually a woman."

Lizzie's eyes widened comically. "You go for the childish kinds, then?"

Nathaniel closed his eyes as his arms encircled the blond. He couldn't stop a tear from falling as he realized that was exactly what he wanted. This is what he had hoped for with Melody.

"Natty?"

"What I go for…is you. The banter and the jokes…you didn't let my comment dictate your response to be serious…" Nathaniel smiled. "I was though. I don't want this for just a night. I want to really get to know you again. The past is the past. I want a future."

Lizzie hid a smile, "Then I suppose I'll be seeing you tomorrow night?"

Nathaniel's eyes sparkled as he nodded before stealing yet another kiss. "I'll see you tomorrow." And he had.

From then on, he and Lizzie easily found the old ground and began walking on the new path ahead of them. It was different and yet the same. Both had grown up, there were new memories between them. Yet Nathaniel couldn't remember being so happy.

They actively began trying to convince Melody to sign the papers and free them both from the shackle of Nathaniel's marriage. It was on one of the many occasions that Melody had refused to sign that he took Lizzie out. Moreover, it was on that night that he finally stayed the night with the fluffy headed blond.

That night was the first time the two of them had sex together. There was none of the nervous energy Nathaniel had felt as a teenager, with no experience. It went smoothly, their bodies lining up perfectly, as though they were dancing steps they had always known, the passion more than Nathaniel had ever felt. He couldn't halt the moisture gathering in his eyes though no tears actually fell.

Time wasted… if they had simply talked back then, would they be like this now. Or, would it be Lizzie he was divorcing?

Lizzie reached up, running her hands through his hair while he lay against the breasts he had enjoyed suckling not half an hour ago. Her hands were trembling a little.

"I'm sorry," she murmured. "I am… so sorry, Nathaniel."

He pushed himself onto his hands, looking down at her, tenderly pushing hair from her cheek before caressing it, kissing her softly. "The past is the past. This is our future now."

"Yes."

End chapter

Author note: So, one more to go. The actual divorce, oh dear… I must be insane … well, review please?