I've been informed that a disclaimer is not legally binding and that it doesn't help if you do get sued for writing fanfiction, but I do feel obliged to credit ideas where they are due. I own nothing here, including the concept, which I found on the Animorphs' Wild Mass Guessing TV Tropes page and immediately fell in love with.

In any event, this centers on Jordan and Sarah, Rachel's little sisters, and they are watching an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer. Enjoy.


Jordan winced as the onscreen vampire knocked Buffy into a tree. "That'll leave a mark."

"And she'll have to explain it to her mom," Sarah added, shifting her blankets to be comfortable.

"Wonder how those conversations go?" Jordan put on a funny voice. "Buffy, where did this scar come from?"

Sarah chimed in with, "I must've walked into a door—again!"

They broke down giggling.

"I bet she comes home all tired and grumpy and scratched up," Sarah mused.

A few seconds later, the front door opened and Rachel stomped in, wearing a torn-up leotard and no shoes. She stopped short at the entrance to the den, staring at her sisters, who stared right back at her.

Jordan elected not to mention the scratches on Rachel's arms or the makeup smeared across her cheek, instead asking, "Are you…limping?"

"What? No. Of course not." Rachel started for the kitchen, walking with a noticeably more even stride.

"Why do you have leaves in your hair?" Sarah asked.

Rachel's hand went self-consciously to her hair. "Cassie…saw a deer. It was hurt. And we rescued it. In the woods."

After a moment of tense quiet, Rachel abruptly turned, muttering, "I need to call Cassie," and went upstairs.

"If she was just with Cassie, why is she calling her?" Sarah asked.

Jordan shrugged, settling back onto the couch. "Maybe she was with a boy."

"Or maybe she's the Slayer," Sarah said, pulling her blanket up to her chin.

They traded looks, remembering the other times Rachel had come home tired, injured, and strangely dressed.

"The Slayer isn't real," Jordan said finally, though she didn't sound as sure as she would've liked.

"'Course not," Sarah agreed. "Even if Rachel is all fashion-y and fighter-y and disappears for hours and comes back limping."

Onscreen, the commercials ended and Buffy came back. Jordan unmuted the TV, and she and Sarah watched for a few minutes as Buffy staked another vampire.

"Rachel could totally beat up vampires," Sarah murmured.

"And that's probably why she spends so much time with Cassie and Jake."

"And Marco's gotta be in on it too."

"Maybe her Watcher is one of the teachers?"

"Wonder why the vampires take her shoes."

"Because her fashion sense is fabulous, of course."

"Rachel is totally the Slayer."

"Mm-hmm."


And there you go. That's what Rachel's sisters think she does with her spare time.

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