Disclaimer: I disclaim.

(A.N. This is an H/J... what else? Umm... If you want me to continue this little analysis of the Jackie/Hyde relationship just click the little "Go" button beside the box reading "Submit review". Once I get... say... um... 5, I'll continue. Thanks! Enjoy!)

*** Hyde***

I don't know how all this started. I don't think she does either. It just kind of happened I guess... dammit. Over the past few weeks, I've been trying to make sense of this oddity that is our relationship. I mean... I could just blow it all off and say it's just a meaningless fling, and believe me, I've been trying to. So has she, but it isn't working. That pisses me off. I'm supposed to hate her and she's supposed to hate me and she's supposed to be with Kelso and I'm supposed to... I don't know... be with anyone but her! But it didn't work out that way, did it? All of a sudden out of nowhere it was like we were two magnets or something. One minute we're sitting there, bored off our asses watching "The Price is Right" and the next we're all over each other. And dammit, it's good. That pisses me off too. The fact that I'm not disgusted when I touch her. The fact that I like it when she's around. The fact that it's dirty and wrong and unnatural, but it doesn't feel like any of that. It feels like it's supposed to be this way. Just me and Jacks in our own little world. A world that isn't full of people whining or shouting or being obnoxious. Though our world is often interrupted by Foreman or Donna or Kelso or Fez, or even Red and Kitty, it's good while it lasts. I sicken myself. I've said it before and I'll say it again: I sicken myself. It's not right, what Jackie and I have. Never in a million years did I think that I'd be spending my spare time cooped up in Foreman's basement groping Kelso's ditzy ex-girlfriend. But that's what happened. I hate that this is what I've become. I hate that I've become the kind of guy that can't tell his friends about his girlfriend. I didn't mean girlfriend... I meant chick. I hate that I've become the kind of guy that can't tell his friends about his chick. I hate that when she's around I want everybody to go away so we can be alone. I hate that she feels the same way. I hate her hair and her eyes and her smile and her everything else. I hate that I even think about her. I hate that I want to run away with her and leave all these dumbasses behind. I hate this whole damn relationship. But dammit, it's good.

***Jackie***

I don't know what it is about him. He's unshaven and grungy and completely not my type. He's sarcastic and smart and funny and can be really sweet when he wants to... but he's not the type of guy I date. I date guys I can be seen with! I date guys with a bright future ahead of them! I date guys who shave! But Steven is just so... him. I don't know what it is I like about him. Maybe it's the way he's so casual about everything. Maybe it's the way he defends me, even when he really doesn't want to. Maybe it's the way he uses the word "badass". Maybe it's the way he does this thing with his mouth that's just... I know what we're doing is wrong... I know it should never have happened. I know that if anyone found out... again... if anyone knew... if KELSO knew, there would be a lot of explaining to do. Though at this point I don't know how I'd answer the intrusive questions that are bound to come up sooner or later. There are some I know the answers to right now: 1) Have you done it yet? No. 2) What's it like? Amazing. Soo good. 3) Does the beard get in the way? Hell no! But then there are the more difficult questions that I'm not ready to answer. I'm not sure I'll ever be ready to answer: 1) Why? I have no idea. 2) How? It just happened! 3) Do you love him? ... I hope they never find out. The questions would be too much. But on the other hand, it would be nice to go out in public for once. Just me and Steven out to a movie, or mini putting, or something! I suppose I like it this way. It's like a secret that only the two of us share. It's romantic. It's even kind of fun. It's almost a game to see how fast we can go from a provocative position to looking like we were just watching TV. It's a bit of a rush. I sometimes I wish we could be a normal couple. I could just be a normal girl with her normal boyfriend. Well... not boyfriend... you know what I mean. But I like our little secret. It's dangerous and fun and... Badass. Yeah... badass.