THE LONG, LONG, LONG, LONG, LONG, 1 YEAR AWAITED CHAPTER HAS FINALLY BEEN RELEASED.

Yeah, it's been a year and we are finally up to date with that the hell is going on. DAMN IM SUCH AN ASS FOR LEAVING YOU GUYS ON THAT CLIFFHANGER FROM CHAPTER 36 D:

Well, here it is. Shizuo and Vorona's dinner conversation.

Shizuo

We had settled on some remote, dim-lit cafe that was nearly empty upon our arrival. The first thing I noticed, was that the scheme of the little restaurant had warmer shades of tawny browns among the furniture with cream toned walls. The tables and chairs were all made of rich chestnut, and throughout the dining area were accents and splashes of red and gold. The tranquil atmosphere was welcoming and cozy alongside the alluring fragrance of various coffee blends. It had a different ambiance compared to the rest of the resort, where everything was white, black, glass and granite. It felt homey in here.

It wasn't much of a surprise that a reserved girl like Vorona prefered quieter places as well. I was glad we could both agree on that. When we were seeking out a place, I had asked if she had been craving anything in particular. She had directed us towards a little hole-in-the-wall cafe, claiming that she had grown partial to this respective shop because of their unique pastries. I wasn't expecting the blonde to have the same fondness for sweets either, but when we were inspecting the array of desserts through the window, I felt a little better knowing that the small number of our common interests were growing. That wasn't to say that it had completely simmered the restlessness I started to encounter after our short run-in with Erika and company.

I shifted awkwardly in my chair, as if finding a comfortable position would subside the troublesome feeling I was subconsciously facing. It was futile to try to concentrate on the blur of words and pictures on the menu in front of me. There were a plethora of other matters to stress over at the moment, one of which was the person graciously sitting across from me.

I had been taking nervous glances above the wall of foreign dessert names between us, trying to read her slight shifts in expressions — challenging myself trying to predict the kind of mood she was in. She had yet to catch me covertly watching her, seeming as I tried to make it as subtle as possible. Every time my eyes wandered to the figure before me, I felt fidgety, unsure of what I was supposed to do in these types of situations. It wasn't a date, I told myself, so why did I feel so antsy?

Was I supposed to act a certain way or talk about something in particular? Should I comment about the weather? Do I ask her how her day was? I felt like this was one of those circumstances like in movies where the main character tries to get to know the girl, but on the same token, I didn't want to come off as that guy. I definitely didn't want to make her feel obligated to partake in whatever embarrassing conversation I managed to strike up, either...I just wanted things to come naturally, only I had no idea of what this 'natural' I was referring to even was.

Maybe I had been wrong. Maybe I wasn't cut out for this type of thing. For so long now, I had been doubting myself capable of these normal, social interactions because of my temper and strength. Now I was beginning to think it was because I was your typical awkward, boyish teenager with no experience talking to women whatsoever. There was a slight chance I was simply looking too hard into things, but the matter still left me feeling like I was at a loss for the right words.

"Senpai is anxious," she stated in her familiar, unwavering tone. She lowered the menu to meet my gaze, catching me red-handed.

"W-Well, I…" I stuttered in attempt to find a sensible excuse. Evidently I sighed, lowering the safety barrier that was my own menu. "I'm sorry for dragging you out here...Vorona," I confessed dipping my head in apology to let my bangs cover my eyes.

There was a pause before she fluidly responded. "Impossible. No physical force necessary for compliance."

I felt a cumbersome smile break across my lips. I really sucked at this.

"I meant I feel bad for being so…" I shrugged, figuring it was best to be frank, "bothersome. I really hope I'm not causing you any trouble."

I could tell she was slightly perplexed based on the way her eyebrows knit tenuously together. "Negative. Situation is neither vexatious nor incommodious. Certain that senpai prefers company. Happy to oblige, no problems."

Her irregular speech pattern, despite seeming matter-of-factually, was comforting nonetheless.

"As long as I'm not inconveniencing you, then I guess it's okay," I feebly decided.

"Inconvenience? Not possible. Replenishing vital sustenance necessary. Human tendency to seek companionship over meal is common. Positive endorphins released in conviviality for both parties."

I looked to the side feeling my fists ball in my lap. It couldn't be helped that I still felt a tinge of guilt for being so doubtful. She was offering peace, and here I was questioning it.

"For lack of better words, I find delight in senpai's presence."

My eyes shot up to meet her violet ones, showing more thoughtfulness than I imagined possible.

Before I had the chance to fumble for a response, our waitress came over to greet us. I didn't catch her name, still caught in surprise by the blonde's tender-hearted reply. I watched her as she spoke politely to the lady taking our order, but I couldn't hear past the echo of her heartfelt comment.

"And for you, sir?"

"Uh, I'll have...hot chocolate?" It came out as more of a question than I had intended, but the waitress understood and nodded with a smile.

"I think you'll like it," she said with a wink as she tucked her notepad in her apron pocket. "I'll be right back with your beverages. Let me know if you have any questions or need a recommendation, alright?" she said with a bright smile.

I blinked in surprise at her friendliness as she walked back to the kitchen. I supposed places like that still existed somewhere in Japan. Ikebukuro wasn't nearly as slow-moving enough to show courtesy to this extent. On the other hand, she also didn't know of my bad reputation, so I wasn't used to this kind of pleasant, served-with-a-smile type of service.

"Shizuo-senpai."

I met the blonde's gaze across from me.

"May I be of assistance in seeking one's peace of mind? Goal to be suitable ally is ideal. First stage of friendship is establishing trust."

I couldn't help but stare back at her quizzically. This was certainly a change in demeanor I was not expecting. I knew she wanted to help, but I guess I never figured she would ask in such a...direct way. Maybe it was because she figured we wouldn't get anywhere with my sulking, therefore she needed to gently pry at me for a response.

I sighed. "About that…" I began, trying to find the right place on the lengthy timeline of events to begin. "Agh, I honestly don't know where to start," I said, running a hand through my locks that were slowly drying from the weather.

I sat in thought for a few minutes and she didn't press any further on the matter. Our drinks arrived and we sipped them in silence.

"Woah," I breathed in surprise. "This is really good," I stared wide eyed at the little decorative mug.

I quickly unfolded my napkin, taking out the western silverware to spoon the whipcream — the best part — off the top of the scalding drink.

I was so invested in the lavishing sweetness of my beverage, the almost unnoticeable hum of amusement from across the table brought me back to reality. When I looked up, Vorona was sipping her coffee, and only then did I realize she was using her own mug to cover her—

Was that...a smile?

She instantly looked away when she saw the surprise I knew was plainly crossing my expression.

"This place...is nice," she said softly, still averting her gaze.

I sat up straighter in my chair giving her more of my attention now. For some reason I felt a little more relaxed.

"Thanks for bringing me here."

She nodded, setting her cup on the small plate on table in front of her, hands still clasped around the ceramic.

"Despite daily visitation, first time for comrade attendance."

I tilted my head to the side. "Like...You mean today?"

Her head shook.

"You mean since we got here?!" I said in astoundment.

She nodded once more and my shoulders slumped a little.

"I see…" was all I could think to say.

We were quiet again until she spoke up.

"Another reason why senpai accompanying is treasurable. Finding companionship deems troublesome."

It was my turn to agree. "Yeah, I know what that's like," I said solemnly, but I wondered if she had realized that about me too.

"Senpai seems to have idealistic partnerships. Admirable."

I smiled doubtfully. "You think so, huh?"

"Most definite."

It must be admirable in her eyes, seeing as I never saw her with anyone else. I guess I was lucky in that aspect.

"Maybe. Maybe it's just because I've known all of 'em for so long," I said honestly.

She brought a hand up to her chin in thought. "Possibility. Could pose certainty for my late arrival to Rajin Academy. Mere acquaintances have been made upon admittance."

The more I thought about it, the more it made sense, since she was a transfer student. I couldn't recall the exact date she moved here, but I was pretty sure it was only within the past year.

"I know it's kind of weird to say, but...You're pretty fluent in Japanese. Do they teach that in school where you come from? I mean, it's completely different from Russian."

She shook her head. "Fundamentally fluent. Conversationally not mastered, nor writing. Negative; Japanese language not taught in school. One could say, taking upon it as a 'hobby'. However, the two are considerably different. Your native language deems challenge for native Russian speakers."

My eyebrows raised in surprise. "You're self taught? Vorona, that's amazing."

The blonde shrugged, as if thinking it wasn't equally as impressive.

"Hobbies include reading many books. Learning languages are both beneficial and enjoyable."

"So...you mean to say you speak more than that?"

"Affirmative. Several European languages are understandable as well as English."

"That's really...impressive," I said in amazement. "I can't really wrap my head around languages…"

"With time and practice, success is most probable. If ever senpai is in need of assistance or tutor, sure to help."

"O-Oh," I said, looking to the side. "Thanks." I could feel my face warm at the thought of my kouhai helping me in school...It was a rather embarrassing thought.

"Anyway," I continued, changing the subject. "I think I know where to start...That is, if you still want to hear me out."

More attentive, she looked at me to continue.

"Well...I'll try to make a long story short." I rubbed the back of my neck nervously. "I have this...uh...acquaintance, I guess you could call 'em…We didn't really used to be friends, and I don't really know if we still are, but we sort of...bonded since we came here. So maybe you could call us friends. But then we had an argument. Like, maybe a falling out or something..."

She listened carefully as I talked about my situation with Izaya, not mentioning who exactly this anonymous person was, and skipping any personal details. The waitress came back one more time to take our food order, but I picked right back up on my story when she was gone.

"Hmmm…" Vorona hummed when I finished giving her the gist of what happened. "This person...sounds familiar."

I froze, not sure if I liked the sound of that.

"Particular individual resembles that of Orihara-san. Actions nearly on par with his behavior."

I couldn't stop the words that tumbled from my lips. "Y-You figured out that it was Izaya just like that?!" I stuttered.

She looked at me as if I were the one that had just surprised her.

"Of course. Undeniable that this person is Orihara-san now. Suspect from the beginning."

"..."

She continued to explain herself.

"Deduction made from watching senpai's interactions with male classmate. Seeming always together. Confusion remained at first, aware of reputation of spite between senpai and Orihara-san. Undoubtedly problematic."

"I...didn't know it was that obvious…" I confessed embarrassingly.

"Other information in addition to own observation. Erika-san cannot be silenced."

Now that was believable. I bowed my head, no longer sure if I could look Vorona in the eyes ever again. There was no telling what kinds of mortifying things Erika might have told her.

"I-Is that so…"

"Erika-san has mentioned favouritism towards senpai's relationship with Orihara-san. She believes you complete one another. At first, skeptical of possibility. Now, uncertain that is the case."

"...Uncertain? What do you mean?"

"I shall elaborate. Orihara-san has proved attraction towards senpai, both physically and emotionally. Understood he holds particular fondness over senpai. Infatuation no doubt. Orihara-san seeks attention."

As I listened to her I felt the butterflies in my stomach going crazy. The blood circulating in my veins was warm and my skin felt hot. I wasn't sure if it was solely because I was flustered, but probably a combination of that and a sense of humble pride that it wasn't just me thinking these things about the flea.

"Well...You're not wrong about the last part…" I replied. Izaya was most definitely attention seeking. "But...how are you so sure that he…" I had to take a deep breath before continuing. "That he likes me like that…"

This time she brought her hand up to her chin in thought. It took her a moment to think of the proper response.

"Something about the way Orihara-san looks at Shizuo-senpai is different. One could call it a 'gut feeling'." she finally said, and I couldn't help but meet her gaze, blinking in surprise at her response.

"Y-You thinks so…?" I was sure now, my embarrassment was more than prominent than ever.

"Certain," she affirmed.

There was another thing I wanted to ask but I was slightly afraid of her answer...I knew it had to be done though. I needed to hear it for myself.

"Do you think...it's weird for a guy...to like another guy in that way…?" I asked more quietly this time.

She canted her head to the side showing a little confusion at my question.

"Is that problematic?"

I shrugged, but before I could reply, she spoke first.

"Uncertain to why issue is present of same-sex couples. Physical attraction is in genetics of all animals. Humans desire emotional companionships when finding significant other. For me, dilemma does not exist."

As the words left her, I could relax. I felt a wave of relief from her non judgemental mindset. I really was glad to have met a friend like her.

"Thank you, Vorona...for being understanding."

"Gratitude is unnecessary. Common belief of not judging book by it's cover. It's what's inside that matters."

I smiled a little more sheepishly now. This was beginning to sound more and more like what I had been trying to tell Izaya earlier...Only she was a little more poetic about it.

"I tried telling him that too...That it didn't matter who or what he liked. Even from the beginning when we didn't like each other, it wasn't like it made a difference...But…" as I repeated the words once again somehow the words started to click.

Hmm...now that you mention it…

"Senpai?"

"Maybe it's just me but...Do you think that maybe he misinterpreted what I said?"

"Possibility is infinite. One's interpretation varies from the next. What was said?"

"Well...I kind of told him that I viewed him the same as I did before...But like! I didn't mean it in the way like we hadn't made progress or anything! I just...I hated him before for stupid reasons, but nothing like that."

The hummed in thought. "Orihara-san's reaction...what was it?"

"Ah, that…" I trailed. "He kind of told me that everything between us had been a lie from the beginning…" my tone saddened at the memory.

"You believed him?" she inquired.

"No," I said, shaking my head. "I don't believe it at all. I just don't understand why he chose to react that way. He seemed dead serious too, but...My gut tells me that he's trying to protect himself again."

She nodded silently to herself, trying to gather as much information on a man she had never met before.

Our waitress came over and dropped our plates off. I had gone with a item on the menu listed under French cuisine. Vorona had recommended it to me, seeing as she had the same sweet tooth. Eating cafe food at night, no matter how fancy, always seemed like having breakfast for dinner, and I was certainly not opposed.

"Has Orihara-san dated before?"

I almost choked on my bite at her sudden question.

I shook my head, coughing. "N-No, he's not really into singling people out like that...He's got a thing for humans...as in the entire human race."

She stared back at me, quirking an eyebrow as if nothing I just said made any sense.

"He's not your typical guy…" was about as much detail as I planned on going into about that matter.

"Senpai is perhaps Orihara-san's first love...Charming."

This time I choked on my drink. She waited for me to stop coughing again, and I was glad I could use that as an excuse to my reddened face.

"I-I don't know if that's the word for it—"

"Explains unreasonable behavior. Unaware of proper handling of emotions. Common predicament of 'hurt or be hurt'. Estimate that the result is fifty-fifty. For him, first option seems adequate."

"Yeah, that pretty much sums him up…"

"Then answer is determined. Senpai is not at fault. Orihara-san can only blame himself."

It sounded a lot like what I had been telling myself all along. Maybe I just needed to hear it from someone else.

"I think you're right. Thanks for helping me clear things up."

"Glad to be of assistance. As for next step, advise to face problem head on. Understand that decision is ultimately his. If I may say, it is his loss."

I nodded in agreement. "I just wish he wasn't so difficult sometimes...And he calls me the hardheaded one..."

The blonde shook her head. "Unlikely accurate statement. Senpai is truthful and straightforward, simple. Possibility, Orihara-san is jealous of behavior. Admirable characteristics senpai has, most definite."

I smiled sheepishly at the flattery in her words. Trying not to let it show, I busied myself with stirring the leftover foam of my drink so I wouldn't have to make eye contact. "Yeah, well...It's not always good to be like that," I explained. "From time to time I wish I could see things from Izaya's point of view, too."

"To put oneself in another's shoes is ideal for improved understanding. Both parties applicable, if doubtful of own accord."

I stopped stirring and sighed. "I at least try to see where he's coming from, but there are times where he just doesn't make any sense. Sometimes I don't even think he knows what he's doing, with how often he lies to himself. I just don't get it."

"Inferiority complex is likely. Orihara-san does not wish to be proven wrong."

At that, I laughed. "You got that right."

Once we had finished our meals, I insisted on paying for us both, since it was the least I could do for taking up part of her evening. She declined initially, but we made the compromise that the next time we went to a cafe — which we made a deal of doing when we got back to Ikebukuro — it would be her treat.

We started heading back to our hotel rooms, but I wanted to continue our conversation.

"Say, Vorona," I began, "why don't you hang out with the rest of our group sometime? I know they'd really like you," I said, offering a smile.

For once, her expression changed to somewhat surprise. She was silent for a moment in thought.

The elevator reached the bottom floor and dinged.

"Familiarizing with senpai's friends seems...nice," she said softly, looking away.

I felt a swell of pride in my chest and nodded. "I'll introduce you," I said, letting her walk in before me.

Something, I wasn't sure what, had my heart fluttering. Maybe it was because I had never met someone like Vorona before...Maybe it was because I had made a new friend who understood me and saw me for the person I am. Because to her, I was human. To her, I wasn't a monster.