Part 3: Baby, let's try not to argue

"That is most inconvenient. Please stop." Despite the lukewarm connotations of the words, Castiel's face had a look on it that Baby had tentatively named 'Special Edition Bitch-Face #19'. It roughly translated to: 'If you don't stop doing (insert irritating and/or blasphemous thing here) right now, I will smite your ass.' Baby thought it was hilarious. Hence why she had spent the better part of an hour throwing bolts, screws and other small metal objects at Cas' head.

"What are you staring at, man?" Sam's voice forced the angel to stop Vulcan-death-glaring at Baby for a few seconds.

Cas turned toward the younger Winchester, the angel's back now to the metal-part-flinging Baby. "There is a malignant presence here," he informed Sam, voice as deadly serious as usual.

Baby threw a handful of washers at him, whooping when they all pinging off the back of his neck and dropped down behind the collars of his trench coat and dress shirt. She could practically sense the angel closing his eyes and doing that little head-tilt-and-sigh thing he did whenever he thought someone (typically Dean) was being horribly immature and vexing.

"There had better not be a ghost haunting my garage," Dean's voice sounded from underneath the car he was tinkering with.

"At least a ghost'd be easier to deal with than the god of sleep," Sam said, his eyes had already begun to drift back to the book in his hands. Apparently washer-flinging, angel-irritating 'malignant presences' were not interesting enough to hold his attention. "You never did explain how you got rid of him." Sam's tone was off-hand, but his gaze was sharp as he eyed Cas over the edge of his book.

"Yeah Cas, what the hell, no more secrets. I'm pretty damn sure they've never worked out in the past. For any of us." Dean's input left them all contemplating past mistakes.

Cas sighed. Baby caught a glimpse of blue as he peered at her out of the corner of his eye. "It is not for me to say," he finally admitted, gaze sliding away from where Baby sat on the counter, in human form, but only visible to the angel.

"Cas." How Dean managed to turn on syllable into an angry snarl conveying several years' worth of angst and irritation never ceased to amaze Baby.

The angel's shoulders slumped a bit. Baby knew he hated keeping secrets from his friends.

"Cas," Sam's voice was a bit more reasonable. He had even set his book aside to say this, underscoring its importance. Sammy Winchester was the undisputed King of Nerds. He set aside his studying for no man. Or, rather, angel. "We need to know what you did in case we need to do it again. Morpheus wasn't alone and he sure as hell wasn't afraid to sic his siblings on people."

"Sick bastard," Dean concurred from under the car.

"So, yeah, I'd say it's pretty damn important that we know what you did so we can do it again."

"You cannot recreate it," Castiel's voice was uncompromising.

"Cas! Just spit it out!" Dean's voice was at its finest drill-sergeant bark, only slightly warped and muffled by the pounds of steel between his face and open air.

Castiel sighed, an oddly human gesture, "I informed you, I transported him to Greece and, using the Impala, buried him in his own temple, forcing himself into sleep again."

Sam snorted, "Yeah, thanks for that."

Castiel shrugged awkwardly. "I offered to assist in the repairs."

"No way in hell, man. You are not getting anywhere near my baby," Dean informed him, absently patting the car as he continued to tinker.

"That is what she said," Castiel sighed, referencing his previous conversation with Baby. A conversation Sam and Dean were not around to hear. There was dead silence in the garage.

"Dude, did you just make a 'that's what she said' joke?" Sam's voice was disbelieving.

Castiel cocked his head to the side, "No?" He sounded uncertain.

"He made a joke. A real joke. And it was somewhere near the zipcode of funny." Dean's voice was just as disbelieving as Sam's. "I think this man deserves a beer."

Castiel's brows furrowed, "I thought the possession of beer was considered to be one of the basic human rights."

"Only by Dean," Sam and Baby clarified at the same time. Castiel shot a look at both of them.

"Okay, man, you've got to tell us why you keep staring at the back wall," Sam said, voice more serious.

"And you still haven't explained what went down in toga-land!" Dean pointed out gruffly. He had slid out from under the car and was now toying with the engine.

"It is as I informed you, I-"

"Yeah, no, I don't know if you've realized, but I already own my fair share of crap, I'm not buying any of yours," Dean snapped, not unkindly.

Sam sighed, once again forced to be the more diplomatic Winchester. "Cas, you obviously did not work alone when you sealed Morpheus. We just need to know what you used, who it is if it's a person and where we all stand on this, got it?"

Cas sighed, shoulders slumping even further. He once again shot a glance at Baby. She shrugged and gave him a big 'what the hell, why not?' thumbs up. This induced yet another sigh from the angel. "I believe you have already met her," he stalled.

"Her?" Sam looked perplexed.

"Her?" Dean just looked hostile. Then again, he always looked hostile at the mention of new people.

"She is, ah-" Cas, poor bastard, seemed to be at a loss for what exactly to say at this point.

Baby groaned. Angel-Boy was going to take all night to explain this if things kept going this way. Mind made up, she slid off the counter and padded over to the car, hopping onto the trunk and from there onto the roof, where she crossed her legs, folded her arms and willed herself to appear. "She, is right here, dumbass."

In the space of a single second both Winchesters were pointing firearms in her direction. Dean was spitting out a string of profanity while Sam was coughing up a string of questions and Cas was just staring at her intently as if questioning her life choices.

Baby stared at the boys impassively. "Hi, there, gents. I'm your car." She patted the hunk of metal underneath her. "And I'm sometimes a girl. But only when you're asleep." She winked at them, resisting the urge to laugh as Dean swore some more and Sam looked intensely uncomfortable. She stretched lazily, arms stretched above her head, making her shirt ride up, flashing her license-plate tattoo. "If that's not creepy enough, normally only Feathers over there can see me. But, we wrecked my vessel pretty bad last time and now I'm floating around kind body-less until you finish fixing me up nice and pretty." She flashed them a teasing smile and rapped her knuckles against her own roof. "The only reason you two can see me right now is cuz I really want you to and I'm feeding off Sparky's angel-mojo."

Castiel looked offended. Sam looked perplexed. Dean looked flat-out stunned. So many emotions on so many faces. This was kind of fun. She swung her legs, heels tapping gently against the car windows. She ignored Dean's winces at the potential for window-breaking found in that action alone. This car was hers. Or her, depending on how you thought about it.

"I helped Cas seal up Morpheus, if that's what you're wondering," she interjected into the heavy silence.

Dean and Sam blinked a bit. Cas stared.

"My car is a chick. A hot chick. My car is a hot chick." That seemed to be all Dean was willing to spit out at the present moment.

"Whoa there, tiger, I don't think about ya 'that way'," Baby teased.

"So, um, you're our car. And you're also a woman. In a car's body. But also in a woman's body…" Sam was apparently attempting to scrape his thought processes into some sort of order.

"I'm a soul that was incarnated as a car. My name is Baby. Any questions?"

"How did… this happen? Don't souls generally reincarnate… differently?" Sam was obviously trying not to offend. Dean, on the other hand, obviously had no issues with offending.

"You get reborn into something living. Human, dung beetle, ostrich, but not a car." Dean had fought past his shock enough to comment.

"She is not an ordinary soul," Castiel said grimly.

"Not an ordinary soul…?" Sam was looking at her curiously. Baby hated that.

"Nope. I'm the soul of a dead angel. How does that make you feel?" She grinned at them. They stared back. It was not a particularly comfortable moment for anyone.

Author's Note: I lied. This will probably run four parts instead of three. I just found there was too much to say here for it to all go into one chapter, so, here we are. Part 4 will better explain Baby's soul's origins and my wacky angel-afterlife head-cannon.

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