Somebody I Used to Know- Chapter 1

I don't own anything.

I did it.

There had been many theories about how she had been killed, the same theories toss and turn in my head as I try to sleep; the same theories are brought up daily, not letting me forget the bright strawberry red hair that glowed in the sunlight. Theories that never put me to peace, but can I really expect them to? After all the theories, the questions, the sad voices, the heartbroken moments, I know I did it.

I killed her.

In the secrecy of our own home, in the darkness of the night, I did it, but then again I didn't do it. Or did I? I knew taking this job could have gotten one of us killed, but I never thought it would happen. I knew that continuing to live under her care could have caused her danger, but I was blinded by myself when I thought I would never let that happen. I didn't know what I could do to her until it was too late.

It's too late.

She's dead, and I'm lonely, alive, and dangerous, but it's all entirely my fault. My stupid job, my stupid relationships with others, my stupid, stupid life killed her. I killed her. I killed Jack Starbright, and there's nothing I can do to change that.

The gray walls match my cold demeanor as I walk down the empty hallway of the Royal and General Bank, I head to Alan Blunts office with the expectance of sheer disappointment that never seizes to surprise me. The white tiles on the floor help me keep track of where I'm going because I don't look up as I walk, there's nothing to look forward to.

After taking 199 steps, I look up and realize I'm in front of Mr. Blunts office door, just as I suspected. I take one more step, because being on an odd number doesn't set right with me, it wouldn't set right with anyone, especially with Jack. I clinch my hand into a small fist before half-heartedly knocking on the door.

"Enter," a voice sounds from the other side of the thick mahogany, and I slowly push down on the gold door knob, opening the door just slightly before I push my way through, and shut it again. "Ah, hello Alex, how are you?" Blunt asks slowly, in a gentle, but firm tone.

"I'm fine." I answer quickly, noticing the other figures in the back of the room. There are four of them, standing against the red wall; all of them look remotely familiar, one more familiar than the others because Ben stands amongst them. I pay no attention to them, or try not to, as I go to sit down in the comfortable, black chair on the other side of the desk.

Mrs. Jones is standing to the side of Blunts desk and she smiles at me sadly before stepping aside and bringing back a candy jar.

"Would you like a peppermint Alex?" She asks with a sad tone of voice that I try not to wince at. It's been 3 days since we buried Jack; I guess it's time for me to get over it.

"No thank you." I say softly, leaning against the soft black cushion. Jack didn't like peppermint, said it had a chalky texture.

"Alex, we are really sorry about your housekeeper. I'm sure you're aware, though, that you need someone with you; you are still a minor." Mr. Blunt explains with sadness in his eyes.

"Yes, I understand. I see your point, however I think that would be very inconvenient." I wouldn't want to kill anyone else like I killed Jack.

"There is no inconvenience in doing this Alex, these men have already agreed to watch out for you. Plus, after some serious thought on behalf of Mrs. Jones and myself, we have come to the conclusion that you need time off. Quite a bit of time off in fact, so we figured you could get away. Go to the country, and relax. Stay out of trouble, and when you're ready, if you're ever ready, you can come back to MI6, and make a career out of this. We don't need you until then Alex." Blunt says with a soft smile, just like Mrs. Jones.

I hate it.

I hate the look of pity from them, the look of sadness I just can't seem to run from, and each time I receive a look that tells me they are sorry for what I've endured, I want to dwell in the thought that I will never get better.

Never.

"Alex? What are your thoughts?" Mrs. Jones asks taking a closer look at my quiet exterior.

"I think you'll do whatever you want to do with or without my consent. I'll make this easier on all of us, and just agree to this." I say, not look up at Blunt, or Mrs. Jones.

"We all think it would be best Alex. Now that it's settled, you and this fine group of men, I'm sure you know them as K-Unit will be living together for quite some time." Mrs. Jones says and gestures to the men behind us.

"Where will we be staying?" I ask, not trying to make a disturbance. "I'm sorry, but I really don't want to go to the training camp" Jack wouldn't want me to leave. She wouldn't want me to be with these guys at a SAS Camp.

"We've been thinking about that. SAS camp is not an option for one reason being that K-Unit doesn't serve there anymore. They are only there for a set amount of weeks before they leave. So K-Unit isn't even K-Unit anymore. Your house now is too small, same with theirs, so we have been thinking about letting you in on a surprise, and while doing so finding a place for you to live." Mr. Blunt states, and with that I raise my eyes to meet his.

"What is it?" I ask quickly, tensions growing in the rooms. I hope it's not a safe house, I really hope it's not a safe house. Jack would complain about the lack of a proper condition, and the fact that we are only there for a certain amount of days before moving again.

"Before your parents died, they bought a house in the country. They signed the house over to you in the will if something was to happen. That house is still in your name, and you have all the rights to it. We believe that it would be the perfect place for you all to live for the time being. It has 5 bedrooms, and nothing has been touched since the death of your parents. Their stuff is there also. I'm sure you would enjoy the house, and also going through their stuff. It's the safest thing we have at the moment." Blunt says with a smile.

"Did my parents ever get to live there?" I ask and he sighs.

"Well no, but they were setting up for when they were to move in. They even made you a nursery, and nothing but the cleaning, has been done to the house. I'm sure you would like to see it before changes are made." Blunt says and I nod.

Jack would be more comfortable with this, heck she would even been sort of happy that I'll have a stable environment, or well more of a stable environment than right now. Currently I've been staying by myself in Ian's house. I've been camping out downstairs, not wanting to face Jacks room yet, and also trying to forget, but since her death, there's an air of silence, and stillness, the opposite of Jack.

"So you agree to this?" Mrs. Jones asks and I nod quietly. "No objections?" She asks with concern and I shake my head no.

"Look Alex, we know that if feels as though everything is falling apart around you, but you just have to wait until things are settled out, then you'll see that things will be better than ever." Mr. Blunt says before standing up. "Head on back to your house and pack, I will send K-Unit that way after I debrief them." Blunt says and I stand up quickly and leave quietly.

Of course I have objections, I feel as though my life if being stripped away from me and it's as if I can't do anything.

What would Jack want?

James's P.O.V (Wolf)

I watch in silence, and worry as Cub, Alex, leaves the office. I stand to attention before the rest of my unit and walk over to Blunts office. I wait until the sound of footsteps quietly disappears down the hallway then clear my throat to speak, but am cut off.

"Scary site isn't it?" Mr. Blunt asks, and I nod.

"The Cub I knew would have just sat and taken that." I say before hearing Blunt laugh.

"The Cub you knew is long gone. Alex Rider is just the shell of a man; nothing is getting in that hard exterior for a while. That's why we need your help."

End Chapter 1

A/N- So... did you enjoy the first chapter? I sure hope you did! If so review! Should I continue this story?

Side note- Alex is very OOC! He's depressed, and doesn't know how to continue without Jack. Depressed people are very unlike themselves, so that is why Alex is what he is.

Anyway, review please because I want to know if this should be a story.

Thanks for reading!