Disclaimer: alas, I do not own Hetalia

Germany stared at the two incredulously. How was it possible to be that stupid?

"If you are approached by England, what do you do?" Germany asked as he crossed his arms over his chest. He saw the two glance at each other before answering. He didn't like when they did that. Everyone, except maybe Italy, knew Germany had a crush on the dim wit.

"Retreat!" Italy cheered happily. "Surrender!" He continued. Germany felt himself get the beginnings of a headache.

"I will not allow myself to be captured! I'll do anything it takes!" Japan said eagerly.

"But what if they do capture you?" Italy asked incredulously.

"LIE!" Japan yelled. Germany sighed. He was surrounded by idiots. He watched as the two started bickering over who had the best answer. The dim wit versus the introvert. Suddenly Japan grabbed Italy by the front of his shirt and pulled him into a kiss. When he let go Italy crumpled to the ground and Japan turned to walk away.

"Japan!" Germany yelled. Japan looked casually over his shoulder just in time to see Germany's fist. There was a loud noise when Germany hit Japan in the face. Japan, not ever willing to give up a fight, took out his katana. Germany, with no weapon raised his fists. They were too focused on each other to hear Italy crying on the ground. Japan began slicing through the air towards Germany but before he even made contact the taller man punched him. Hard. In the face. Japan fell backwards to the ground in a heap of dust and dirt. Germany turned to Italy who was now being carried away by England, and France. Germany sighed and touched his temple. The idiot. "Get up Japan. We must go after that Dummkopf."

"Shall we finish this fight later then?" Japan asked. Germany shot him an incredulous look but there were more important things to focus on at the moment. Japan got up and the two went after their comrade. By the time they reached Italy he was tied to a chair and being hit in the head by England. France was hitting Italy in the head with a stick. Both the attackers were laughing but Italy was crying.

"I told you two!" Germany roared as he chased the two away. They hurried off and when Germany returned Japan was already untying the idiot from the chair.

"Thank you Japan!" Italy said as the ropes fell. He hugged the slender man happily. Japan just stood there uncomfortably.

"You Dummkopf!" Germany said as Italy let go of Japan. The stupid little country looked up at Germany with big brown eyes as the beginnings of tears swelled in his eyes. "Let's go home." Germany sighed. Japan nodded curtly and turned to leave. Germany followed him but when he turned around Italy wasn't moving. Germany sighed, the idiot. He walked over and grabbed Italy by the hand. "Well come on then! I'm not going to drag you the whole way." He said. Italy just let himself be tugged on.

"Germany?" Italy whispered after a while.

"What?" Germany asked looking down at his little Italy.

"Please don't fight with Japan." He said shyly.

"Wha-" Germany shut his mouth before he said something stupid. He looked down at Italy. Big brown innocent eyes, brown hair with that one curl that always went askew, a small blush on his milky skin and the beginnings of bruises on his head from England and France's ministrations. Germany sighed. "Fine." He said. He watched as a goofy smile formed on Italy's lips.

"How about I make pasta for dinner?" Italy asked happily as he began dragging Germany to his home. Germany sighed, great, pasta, again. Germany sighed, the things he put up with for Italy. The things he put up with for love.