Disclaimer: (To the tune of the alphabet) ABCDEFG, show does not belong to me. If it did than I'd be glad, but it's not mine so I'm sad, ABCDEFG, thanks for reading my story!

What will we find out when the Doctor begins to spout random secrets? Dundundun...

The Doctor dashed into the TARDIS just in time, slamming the door shut and heaving a sigh.

He glanced at Rose and they were silent for a moment as both their eyes fell on the shaking entryway. Then it stopped; their pursuers had given up.

Rose raised an eyebrow at her time lord, her tongue resting cheekily between her teeth. Then, as if by magic, the tension was gone and the two began to laugh hard, harder than they had in weeks.

"I can't believe you tried to steal their royal banana!" Rose shouted, wiping tears from her eyes.

"I can't believe it took nineteen of them to stop me," The Doctor replied, leaning against a wall. "Who knew a banana could be so important to a species?"

"Important enough for them to tie you up and interrogate you."

The tall, skinny man shook his head, grinning, and sat down on the bench beside him. "Try. They tried to tie me up and interrogate me. All they succeeded in doing was injecting me with a -" he stopped suddenly, abruptly, a funny look suddenly overtaking his face. "Truth serum," he finished, weakly.

Rose took a step forward and, concerned, placed a hand gently on her companion's arm. "Doctor?" She frowned, uncertain.

"Rose, Rose, Rose. This is bad, this is very bad." The Doctor shot to his feet. "Candorian truth serums* are not normal. They're not... They're not..." His eyes bulged as the solution began to take effect.

The blonde girl panicked. "What do I do? How's it different? Doctor?"

Her friend shook his head, a hand slapped over his mouth. He parted with it, uncertainly, to answer her. "The very, very annoying thing about the Candorian truth serum is that it... It makes you spout random - WHEN I WAS SEVEN I STOLE KOSHEI'S LEFT SHOE AND BURIED IT UNDER THE SCHOOL - secrets. Used, for the most part, as a game in Gallifreyan children's sleepovers." He grimaced at himself, having finally confessed.**

Rose burst out laughing. "Well, that's not that bad, mate! I was thinking you'd just about sprout another head!"

"No, no, no, no, no, no, Rose," the Doctor shook his head, his face stone-cold serious. "This is very, very bad."

"Why?"

"Because of my biggest - I GET A STRANGE PLEASURE OUT OF RUFFLING MY OWN HAIR - secret." The time lord's face turned bright pink as he realized what he had said, and he re-clamped a hand over his mouth.

Rose burst out laughing. "Your biggest secret? Other than THAT?"

"My name, Rose, my NAME!"

"Oh," the girl replied, thinking. Oh, indeed. She did want to know his name. I mean, who wouldn't? Then again, she knew it was his biggest secret, his biggest secret of all. She couldn't risk finding out. She took a deep breath. "What can I do?"

"It should only last about five to ten minutes, very brief. Brief and annoying, that's how it is. Ask... Ask me questions! That's good, eh? A good game? Twenty questions! Good!"

"Questions?"

"As long as my brain is preoccupied, telling the truth, yadda yadda, I can't spill anymore - I SHIP JOHNLOCK - things that should very much not be spilled!"

Rose nodded, understanding, and scrambled around, running a hand through her hair. "Okay. Uh, uh, uh, how old are you?"

"How old am I! Good q- I don't really know how old I am, I just make it up on the spot, I don't keep track, how could I possibly - uestion." The Doctor frowned at himself. "No need to interrupt me, I was going to answer it anyway."

Rose swallowed, uncertain of how to respond. "Um, okay..."

"Another!"

"Uh, how many companions have you had?"

"I dunno, a lot!"

"A lot?"

"I dunno! Another question, hurry! Can't give my brain time to settle or another secret will - I HATE PEARS, I WAS ONLY PRETENDING TO ENJOY YOUR MOTHER'S PIE- burst out."

"You didn't like my mum's pie?" Rose smiled, raising an eyebrow.

The Doctor threw his hands up in the air in exasperation. "Who makes a pear pie?! Was she deliberately TRYING to poison me? Another question!"

"Um, have you ever, ever..."

"Hurry!"

"Have you ever kissed Jack?!" She promptly burst out laughing at the complete preposterousness of what she had just said.

The Doctor wore a horrified expression. "Jack?! Captain Jack Harkness?!"

"It was the first thing that came to my mind, I dunno, I panicked!"

The man cleared his throat and looked the at the wall, at the floor, anywhere but at Rose. "New question."

Her mouth fell open and a hand flew upwards to cover it. "You have, haven't you?"

"What?!" The Doctor blushed. "No! I... No way! I... Yes, I have." His eyes grew huge - betrayed by his mouth once more (in more ways than one). "But it wasn't like that! It was... An accident, someone had given me the wrong drink, some sort of, I dunno, a Space Floridan soda, and things went a bit fuzzy after that... It wasn't my fault!"

Rose was too busy laughing to respond. "Okay, um... What other companions have you kissed?"

The man blinked for a second, then broke out into a sheepish grin. "I kissed you."

"You saved my life with that kiss."

"Yes, yes I did."

The two smiled at each other for a moment in a comfortable silence, until, "I THINK THIS IS MY HANDSOMEST REGENERATION" burst from The Doctor's mouth.

Rose grinned, her tongue poking though her teach. "You do change your clothes a lot more often, I'll give you that one. Next question..." She paused. Then, in a rush, she blurted, "How do you feel about me, Doctor? Really?"

The Doctor's eyebrows raised in surprise and he stuttered to try and find the right words to respond. "Well, I... Well, Rose, I... Um..." Then his expression changed, and he smiled, relieved.

"Doctor?" Rose pressed forward.

"Ah... Good news, Rose!" The Doctor grinned. "It's been six minutes - the serum's seemed to have worn off!"

The girl blinked. "Oh, that's, that's great."

"Yes, it is, Rose Tyler. Thank you. You saved me from myself, once again."

"Yeah," Rose Tyler smiled and stuck her hands in pockets. "I guess I did."

*Something I made up... Candor = truthful.

**Perhaps that's why the Master has issues with the Doctor.

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- Impossible Oswin