I'm back!

Sorry for the long wait, but it's finally done!

A few notes: The first half is completely written from scratch. It's what happened to Merlin in the three weeks he was away. The second half is an edited version of Arthur and Merlin's conversations, which I haven't rewritten. It's marked as XxXxX, which is different from my normal line breaks, so feel free to skip that part if you want too. I've also added a section onto the end, which is also written from scratch.

Enjoy!

XxX

"Get out."

Merlin ran through the corridors, trying not to let his tears blind him.

"I trusted you and you betrayed me."

He hadn't meant to... He hadn't! He'd just wanted his friends to be safe. He'd just wanted Gwen and Arthur to be safe.

"Leave. Just... Just go. Go away Merlin."

And he would.

There was nothing her for him now, with what remained of his fragile friendships shattering around him. No, he had to escape, had to forget this place. He would go to Ealdor, to his mother, and tell her what happened. Just for a little while, maybe, and then he would move on. To where, he didn't know. But he couldn't stay in Ealdor and give Arthur another reason to hunt him...

At that thought, Merlin's chest constricted. He stopped short, his hand shooting out to steady himself against the wall. Gods, he couldn't breathe...

A choked sob forced itself from his lips and he lost his grip on the stone, landing on the cold floor. He didn't notice the shock of pain that shot through his knees as he bent over, trying to muffle his cries.

So caught up in his grief, Merlin didn't hear the door next to him open, and was unaware of the person approaching him. It wasn't until a pair of arms circled him, and he was hit with an overwhelming scent of herbs did Merlin realise that Gaius had knelt down beside him, offering what little comfort he could. "Oh my boy..." The Warlock turned, burying hi face in the coarse fabric of his mentor's robe and let himself go.

And that was how they remained until he had no more tears to shed.

XxX

"Where will you go?"

Merlin shrugged, scratching at the wooden table. "I don't know. But I can't stay in Ealdor, it would endanger my mother. It's better you don't know where I'm going, actually. He can't make you tell him anything if you don't know."

Gaius shook his head, his expression sad. "Arthur would never hurt your mother, Merlin. Or you..."

"You don't know that!" Merlin yelled, jumping to his feet. "You saw how he treated Gwen, and she hadn't been betraying him for years! What happens when he stops feeling hurt and starts feeling angry? I can't take that risk, and he told me to go, Gaius... He told me to go..."

The Physician frowned. "He... You're banished?"

Merlin bowed his head, unable to look his mentor in the eyes. He couldn't believe it had come to this, being forced to leave his home like a common criminal... "I just hope he doesn't take it out on you and my mother."

"Arthur would never..."

Merlin slammed his hands on the table. "I don't know what he's going to do, Gaius! He's so angry, and I can't take any more risks! You're in enough danger as it is."

Gaius just watched him sadly. "I know I can't stop you, Merlin, no matter how much I want too. When will you be leaving?"

Standing up, he rounded the table, wrapping his arms around his mentor. "I sorry, Gaius."

The old man sighed, holding him close. "Me too, Merlin."

Merlin retreated to his room to pack.

He needed to be far away from Camelot by the time Arthur woke tomorrow morning.

XxX

His horse was saddled and his bags were packed within the next two hours. He was out of Camelot and far away before the sun rose.

XxX

It was early morning by the time Merlin stopped riding, bringing his horse to stand still. Dismounting quickly, the Warlock leant against a tree, desperately trying to catch his breath as tears cascaded down his face. His breath was coming out in short, sharp wheezes as his chest constricted. A choked sob escaped his lips and he collapsed, his back against the bark, raising his head to stare at the canopy of leaves.

Everything was peaceful, like his world wasn't collapsing around him.

He tried to inhale deeply, but the air caught in his throat, refusing his lungs the steady breaths they so needed.

It hurt. God, it hurt so much...

He leant forward, pressing his forehead against his knees in order to try and focus. To calm his trembling body.

"Emrys..."

Merlin was on his feet in an instant, his hand stretched out in front of him. Iseldir raised his hands in surrender.

"There is nothing to fear, Emrys. We heard what had happened it Camelot. We have come to offer our assistance."

The Warlock lowered his arm, still watching the Druid warily. "How do you know what happened?"

"The Great Dragon felt your distress and called for our assistance."

"You know Kilgharrah?"

"I was friends with your father before the Purge, but we lost contact when we were both forced into hiding. He was a good man; I was sorry to hear of his death."

Merlin nodded his head, looking down at the ground. "Thank you for that. But I'm afraid I can't help you. You know that I've been banished from Camelot, I can no longer help you in your quest for the Golden Age."

Iseldir shook his head. "That is not why I am here, Emrys. I am here to offer you a home."

The Warlock stared at the Druid. "A home? But I cannot offer you anything."

"You have done enough. We cannot let you go without a home. Come with us."

"My mother..."

"We can bring her with us. You can both live in peace."

"No," Merlin shook his head. "I won't ask her to leave her home because of me. She deserves more than that."

Iseldir simple nodded, gesturing behind him as more Druids stepped out of the trees. "A message then. To let her know you are safe. The offer is open, should you or your mother change your mind."

He stood there, his mind in turmoil. Whilst he wanted to go see his mother, a message was a safer offer. A letter, as evidence that she didn't know where he was.

It was the safest option. And, after several minutes of silence, Merlin agreed.

XxX

Merlin attached the two letters together, hesitating before handing them to the Druid. "I will make sure your mother receives these, Emrys." The Warlock nodded, not trusting himself to speak. This would be the last time he sent a message to his mother for a very long time. He hadn't seen her in years and now, through his own stupidity, he may never see her again. Was there something else he should have said to her? Had he told her how much he loved her? Did she know?

What about Arthur? Would that letter be sufficient to explain himself to the King? Would he even read the letter or would he just burn it? Merlin would never know... He was never going to see his best friend again.

He wasn't even aware of his legs giving out on him as the sobs racked his body. The retreating rider became a blur and he felt strong arms wrap around his waist.

"Emrys..."

He had to get his body back under control... And then Iseldir was lifting him, aided by magic, and putting him back on his horse.

"Emrys, we must go. There may be search parties."

He felt the knife dig deeper at the thought of his best friend hunting him. Could he even still consider Arthur his friend?

Merlin couldn't handle it. His entire world was crumbling around him and there was nothing he could do about it.

The Warlock was unresponsive as the druids led him away to his new life.

XxX

Life in the druid camp was very peaceful. The people had we welcomed him with a mixture of awe and respect, with not one accusing look aimed his way. The elders tried to reassure him, insisting that this was just another stepping stone in the path to his destiny. He just needed to wait it out; the King would respond to his letter and make the first step towards building the bridge between his stone and the next.

But the weight of his secret had already come crashing down around him. And Merlin wasn't sure he could wait any longer.

However, the druid camp could be his home for now, even if it was only temporary. Here, he was free to use his magic how he wished.

In the first few days, Merlin did nothing. He sat by the fire pit, staring into the flames. Several different members of the camp approached him, offering him food and company. Initially, he'd refused, already feeling guilty about entering their camp and taking a bed after failing them. No-one could convince him otherwise.

And then the children had intervened.

On the morning of the third day, a young girl, no older than 8, had approached him, holding a bowl of porridge. She had a look of pure determination on her face, and Merlin had been powerless to refuse her.

She'd sat herself down next to him, watching him eat with big, curious eyes. "Mother says all new people are sad, because they feel like they've lost everything. She says it's our job to help them get stuff back, so that they have something to make them feel happy again.

And, for the first time since his magic had come out five days ago, Merlin smiled. "Are you going to help me find some stuff?"

"Yeah!" She grinned, jumping up. "I can help you. I'm really good at finding stuff."

"Cathy!" The girl jumped, looking guilty. A stern, older woman approached them, obviously Cathy's mother. "What did I tell you about disturbing Emrys? I'm so sorry, My Lord."

Merlin waved his hand, smiling up at her. "It's fine. Cathy was just bringing me some breakfast and telling me about her finding skills."

Cathy beamed up at her mother, who looked slightly stunned but grateful at his words. "Oh! Well, I'm glad she's being helpful. Just make sure you get your chores done, Cathy. "

"Of course, Mother. Emrys, would you like to play with me and my friends later, after I finish my chores?" And she turned her baby blue eyes on him, so wide and filled with hope that Merlin found himself nodding without real thought about what he was doing. Cathy squealed in delight before running off after her mother, leaving the Warlock with a half empty bowl. Smiling gently to himself, he continued eating.

After all, he couldn't let the children down.

XxX

It became a part of his routine. The children would bring him breakfast and talk to him before dragging him off to play. He would show them tricks and tell them stories. Then, they would sit him down and make him eat lunch before they all disappeared to do their chores, at which stage, the adults approached him.

They were tentative at first, unsure of how he would react to them speaking to him, but he'd done his best to welcome each and every one of them as best he could. Cathy's mother had been the first to talk to him, inviting him to sit with her as she worked on potions and poultices required by the rest of the camp. It had been an odd coincidence, the first adult he spoke to being one of the Physicians in the druid camp. Nevertheless, Merlin shared what knowledge he had learned with Gertrude, Cathy's mother, and had been pleasantly surprised with how impressed she had seemed.

He spent several afternoons in Gertrude's little area, treating the sick and the wounded, although the wounds were much less serious than those in Camelot. He also started to visit the different trades within the druid camp, finding himself more and more eager to learn again. It kept his mind off of his former life, and helped him try to find a place within the camp.

Of course, Merlin was still experimenting, and he still had his dark moments when he wanted to distance himself from everything and just forget. When he had days like that, the others in the camp respected his need for space and time. There were days when it was difficult to forget the years of friendship that had been cast aside in a moment of weakness. Days when he couldn't help but feel guilty at how quickly he had tried to move on.

But he had to.

Merlin knew from experience that dwelling on the past wouldn't do him any good. He had to go on with his life. It wasn't easy, but previous experience had taught him a hard lesson. It was just... hard. And it would take time for him to adjust, but he could do it.

He just needed time.

XxX

Almost two weeks into Merlin's stay at the camp, one of the younger children pointed out another difference between the Warlock and the rest of the druids.

"Where's your magic mark?"

Merlin turned to the child, a young boy named Laurence who hung on every word he said, frowning slightly in confusion. "Magic mark."

"Yeah," he nodded. "Like my fathers'. Everyone has one, and father said I can have one when I'm a little older too."

Right, the druid tattoos. Most of the permanent residents of the druid camp had one; Merlin remembered that Mordred had one on his shoulder. He hadn't been aware that there was an age restriction on the tattoos, but it wasn't surprising that Iseldir had put a limit on them to try and protect the children. They couldn't count on anyone else to protect them.

The Warlock turned back to Laurence, smiling gently at him. "I haven't got one yet. Do you think I should?"

The boy grinned up at him. "Yeah! Maybe here!" He pointed at his own wrist. Merlin tilted his head to the side, considering the boys' suggestion.

This would be it; how he finally severed all ties to Camelot. A druid tattoo would link him to this clan permanently, establishing new roots for him. This was the fresh start in a new home...

Mind made up, Merlin turned back to the story he was telling. Once the children had been called away, he approached Gertrude, who immediately agreed to help him.

That evening, Merlin showed Laurence and his excited friends his new tattoo, clearly visible on his left wrist.

XxX

Life in the druid camp went on after Merlin got his tattoo. He was still adjusting to the everyday workings of the camp, but he was getting there. The other residents were less formal around him now. Some of them had even started calling him Merlin, instead of Emrys.

Three weeks had passed now since he'd left Camelot. Some days, it felt like mere moments; other times it felt like years. But he was getting there. Slowly, he was beginning to feel like he could, one day, call this camp home.

And then it happened.

Three weeks and two days after he'd left Camelot, he'd been having a bad day. Feeling the need to clear his mind, Merlin had grabbed his new Druids cloak and gone for a walk in the surrounding forest. The fresh air and sun had gone straight to his head, and he'd spent hours in the clearing, protected by his magic swirling around him, unhindered and free. The last time had had used his magic this openly, he'd almost got Gaius killed. Here, he didn't have to worry about any of that. He was well-hidden and far from the druid camp.

And, despite everything, he had never felt so free.

Before he knew it, the sun had shifted position, and he was bathed in shadow. Stretching, he stood, using his magic to brush the grass from his clothes before picking up his cloak and wrapping it around his shoulders.

The trek back to the camp didn't take long, but he was in no hurry. Evening meal wasn't for another hour or so, and he didn't have anywhere to be till then. He wasn't far from the camp. Of course, there were the lessons with the children after they'd eaten, but teaching the children wasn't much of a chore.

Although he had had to replace several sets of eyebrows last week.

Smirking at the memory, Merlin emerged from the bushes, the cave where the druids were living just ahead of him…

And froze.

Horses were tethered outside, grazing peacefully. To anyone else, it wouldn't mean anything, but Merlin had spent enough time in Camelot's stables to recognise the Knights' horses when he saw them, even without their riders or the colours of Camelot emblazoned on the saddles.

They had found him.

His first instinct was to run; to turn tail and run away and never look back. But the thought was dismissed as quickly as it had come. He couldn't abandon the druids, especially as they have been so kind to him. There would not be a repeat of the incident with Morgana, Mordred and the Druids.

Pulling up his hood, Merlin crept forward, sticking to the shadows and he made his way down the entrance tunnel. He could hear voices ahead, and easily distinguished Arthur's voice, despite the echoing. He felt his blood run cold… Arthur had personally come… How had they found him?

But there was no screaming, no running. Surely if the Knights of Camelot were in the camp, the people would be trying to escape from them, not inviting them into their home. Peering round the corner, Merlin felt his heart stop….

There was Gwaine, chatting away with Gertrude and Cathy. He could see Percival and Leon talking to a young group of men, all of whom were smiling. Arthur was just stood back, watching the rest of his Knights interact, his lips curling in a small smile…

It had to be a trick. This couldn't really be happening. What were they doing here? Why were the druids trusting them?

Iseldir caught his eye and motioned for him to join them, but Merlin shook his head, moving towards the fire pit that burned happily away from the bizarre meeting. He couldn't face this, couldn't deal with the people he had been trying to forget about for the last three weeks.

Taking a seat in front of the pit, Merlin pulled his hood lower over his eyes and did his best to ignore the happy sounds around him.

XxXxX

Merlin felt, more than heard, Arthur come up beside him. The King made no move to sit down, and Merlin made no move to turn around. "I believe this is yours."

Merlin turned, studying the King for a moment, before taking the neckerchief. "Thank you."

"I couldn't believe it when I realised you'd left it behind." He heard the King's joking tone and knew his former-friend was trying to break the inevitable ice but he didn't react, keeping his attention on the rough material in his hands. Merlin felt, rather than saw, Arthur take a seat next to him, and mentally prepared himself for a long, difficult, conversation.

"I told you not to look for me."

"When do I ever do as you tell me?" Another joke. Why was he prolonging this?

"You shouldn't be here." Merlin turned, his expression stony, and was taken aback by the sadness in the King's eyes, an emotion present that almost looked like regret.

Arthur swallowed. "I didn't know you were here, Merlin. It never occurred to me that you'd come here; I'm guessing that that wasn't your first time meeting Iseldir."

He could feel anger and frustration boiling up inside him. How dare Arthur come here and act like nothing happened! The man had chased him from his home, cut him off from his friends, and now he wanted to… What? What had he even come for? "Why are you doing this? Acting as if nothing happened; as if nothing has changed! I'm a sorcerer, Arthur... a druid!" He drew back his sleeve, exposing his wrist, the druid tattoo standing out against the pale skin as if it had always belonged there. "As soon as I arrived here, they made me one of them. In a way, I always have been."

"You left before we could have a proper talk."

"I assumed you were going to chop my head off. There was nothing left to talk about."

He regretted it as soon as he said it. He saw the words hit Arthur, the hurt and dismay appearing on his face as he swallowed and turned away to stare at his hands. Arthur had never been so open with his emotions before, and Merlin couldn't imagine what had happened in the last three weeks that had changed his friend so much.

"Is that what you think of me? That I would betray eight years of loyalty and friendship as if it meant nothing?"

"When it comes to magic, Arthur, I never know what you're going to do," the Warlock muttered. "And... I never wanted you to make that decision. If I left, you wouldn't have to make a choice."

"That's what you were worried about? You left to stop me having to make a choice?"

He tried to shrug it off, avoiding looking at Arthur by glancing around at his friends, the people that had taken him in despite everything, laughing with those they had every right to fear. "And then I come back here to find a cave full of Knights! At first, I thought it was another raid, but they're all talking and laughing..." he trailed off, waiting for Arthur's explanation.

Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Arthur's demeanour change, an uneasy calm settling over the King's face. "The first step to the legalisation of magic, of course." Merlin whipped his head round his neck cricking. "I wish it didn't have to be so slow; I'd do it quicker if I could, but I don't want to cause a panic."

"You... magic... what?" This couldn't be real… It had to be a joke.

"Eloquent as ever," Arthur grinned. The banter was flowing so easily from his friend, and Merlin wished he felt ready to respond, but he felt stunned. "Yes, I'm legalising magic. I'd hoped it would draw you out of hiding one day; nobody thought I was going to find you. You'd have to come to me. Even with magic being legal, I wasn't sure if you were going to come."

Tears were prickling behind his eyes and he choked on his words, his chest swelling with hope "Magic is legal?" His voice was barely above a whisper, and it gave away everything he was feeling, even if he couldn't express it clearly himself.

"It will be. Soon."

Merlin opened his mouth, a choked sound coming out instead of words. He swallowed, and blinked rapidly, before trying again. "Arthur..."

"It'll be your decision if, and when, you return to Camelot." Return? He'd never even considered that a possibility! And why was Arthur suddenly talking to him like they were in an official meeting? "If you do choose to return, you will be welcomed with open arms. A position of your choosing, whether you'll return to work for Gaius or become my first advisor, it's really your choice. And if..." Arthur's voice choked here and he saw the King swallow. "If you choose to remain here, or go elsewhere, I won't hold it against you. I'll make sure that you are well provided for, and your mother. It's the least I can do for you."

The Warlock shook his he went back, he'd have to face everything that had happened, everything he'd sworn he'd never speak about again so that he could maintain a false hope that, somehow, Arthur still cared about him. "You don't understand, Arthur. I've done things, things you don't even know about, things I can barely face. If I return to Camelot, I'll have to tell you about it all. And then you'd believe me to be evil. That's another reason why I can never come back. Because I wanted to pretend that we were still friends."

"We are still friends," Arthur insisted, placing his hand on Merlin's bony shoulder, and the touch was so friendly, so familiar, he almost believed it. "And nothing you say will ever change that."

"You don't know that," Merlin hissed, pushing his hand away. "Did you think it was easy for me? To keep you safe, I had to do things, Arthur. Things I deeply regret. A lot of people got hurt, and a lot of people died."

"That's war, Merlin," Arthur shifted closer as Merlin shuffled away. "You make mistakes, and you do what you can to fix it afterwards. Did you fix your mistakes?"

He'd tried. God, he'd tried. He tipped his head back and took a deep breath. "Yes..."

"What did it cost you?"

"My father," he whispered, bowing his head, and wiping his eyes. "I made a deal when Camelot was attacked. I tried to put off my side of the bargain, but then I needed his help again, and he wouldn't tell me what I needed to know unless I swore I would fulfil my part once it was all over. I think I tried to convince myself nothing bad would happen, but, deep down, I knew it could be the end of Camelot."

"You released the Great Dragon."

Panic flared in his stomach, his breath catching as he stared at Arthur. "What? How did you..?"

"Gaius told me that your Balinor was your father. I guessed you might have had something to do with the Great Dragon's release. What was the deal you made?"

He couldn't understand what Arthur was saying. He knew that Balinor was his father, and he was alright with that? That he'd released the dragon and he was still offering to let Merlin come home? Why was he taking it so well? The words were falling from his mouth, answering Arthur's question before he even realised what he was doing. "He told me how to defeat Sigan and the Knights of Medhir in exchange for his freedom..."

"Never mind that!" Arthur sudden exclamation made him jump. "Why did you never tell me about Freya?"

Panic flared in his cobalt eyes. No… There was no way that Gaius would have told Arthur that… "He told you about Freya?" Arthur nodded. "How much did he tell you?"

"Nothing like that!" Arthur wrinkled his nose. "Just that you loved her, and she... she was killed because she had magic. You were there when it happened."

Merlin closed his eyes and let out a breath. "I didn't tell you for that reason. Freya had magic. She understood me, in a way no one else could. Gaius pretends to know what it's like, but he had a choice. Freya... She didn't. She was just like me, with this burden thrust upon her. She was different; she thought she was a monster... Just like me."

A hand on his shoulder, gripping it tightly forced him round and he complied, looking at Arthur, and was surprised to see sympathy and compassion in the King's eyes. "Listen to me, Merlin. You are not, a monster. There is nothing wrong with who you are; a kind, self-less, brave man who would risk everything for his friends and family. I'm just sorry it took me so long to realise that."

Merlin tilted his head to the side, a million things racing through his mind. "I don't understand. The last time I saw you I honestly thought you were going to try and kill me! What changed your mind?"

The King didn't reply instantly, the lines on his face smoothing out as he seemed to consider Merlin's question. Merlin watched him, waiting until Arthur finally spoke again. "Losing you."

"Losing me?" What?

Arthur nodded. "I was so angry with you, I didn't go to Gaius' chambers to talk to you; I just assumed you were going to be there when I was ready. You always are. And then Gwen told me that you weren't there anymore. It sent me into a panic, and all I could think about was finding you. From there, everything else just slotted into place." Merlin continued to stare at him in disbelief, and Arthur sighed. "I don't think you realise how much you mean to me, Merlin. For ten years, you have been the one good, constant thing in my life, and I nearly threw all of that away for the sake of my pride. It didn't matter that you had magic, or that you could command a dragon. It didn't matter that you hid and lied to save your own life... I just... You've always been there. When my father was angry, when I had a fight with Gwen, and when I doubted my resolve as a King, it was you that brought me back from the darkness. So what if you have a secret; lots of people have secrets. I just wish I'd understood this sooner; soon enough to save you this pain."

Merlin stared at the King, his jaw slightly open. To hear, after all these years, that Arthur knew what he'd done and was grateful suddenly made the pain and work he had put into Camelot seem like a distant memory. It meant everything. "The pain was worth it," Merlin whispered, drawing his attention back to the Warlock. "Just to see the King you've become. I'm so proud of you, Arthur, never forget that." Merlin gave him a gentle smile but, before he could say more, Gwaine appeared, gesturing for Arthur to join him.

Merlin instinctively pulled his hood forward, hiding his face as Arthur turned to nod at the Knight. "I should..."

"Yeah." As Arthur stood, Merlin made no move to join him, causing him to frown.

"Are you not coming with me?"

"I need time to think about this Arthur." Arthur's tone almost made him stand up, but he couldn't. Seeing Gwaine and remembering everyone else in Camelot had reminded him of the doubts he'd had at the beginning of their conversation. This was…. years of ingrained habits and beliefs he now had to sort through, and he couldn't do that if the Knights were pressuring him for stories. "Arthur! Don't... Don't tell the others I'm here."

Arthur glanced at him before nodding. "Of course."

XxXxX

As soon as the King had turned his back, Merlin made a break for his tent. Walking quickly so that he didn't draw attention to himself, the Warlock tucked himself away, zipping up the opening before anyone could call him back, his neckerchief clutched tightly in his hand.

Moving round so his back was against the cold, stone wall that served as the rear of his little home, he sank to the ground, tears welling up in his eyes.

He couldn't believe this had happened. How could this possibly have happened? Just a few hours ago there had been no hope of him ever returning to Camelot, of ever seeing Arthur again, and now the King was outside and talking to him… That, not only was the ban on magic being repealed, he could go home. It all seemed like a dream. And Arthur… he knew everything. About Kilgharrah, probably about Morgana too, and he still wanted him to come home.

It felt too good to be true.

And anything that felt too good, usually was.

Just three weeks after he lost everything, all his dreams, his wishes since he was a little boy, were being handed to him on a silver platter. No strings attatched…

He was having some trouble coming to terms with all of this.

"Emrys…"

Merlin jerked his head up, his eyes flaring gold as he allowed his magic to identify the person before opening the tent flap and allowing the older man enter.

"Shouldn't you be celebrating with the others?"

"Shouldn't you?" Iseldir asked, closing the entrance and sitting down in front of it. "Something is troubling you? I thought you would have been pleased to hear King Arthur's news."

"It changes everything."

"Not exactly." The Warlock sighed, allowing his worries to come back to the forefront of his mind. "How can I trust he's telling me the truth? Years of brainwashing don't go away in a few week, there has to be more to it. How could one man change nearly 30 years of prejudice and hate? It's not possible."

Iseldir tilted his head to the side, studying Merlin with a raised eyebrow and a curious look. "Is it the King you doubt, or yourself?"

Merlin stared at him. "I don't…"

"Despite what your king has just said, you doubt that he has truly changed his mind, that you have changed his mind. You doubt that you were truly strong enough to have an effect on his judgement."

The Warlock opened his mouth to argue, but found he could not come up with an argument. He'd spent so long convincing himself that he was going to fail, that he had failed, that it was difficult to think of anything else.

However, one thing he was certain of was that Arthur wasn't a liar.

So why was he doubting what the King had said, when all evidence proved otherwise? His faith in his friend hadn't been that shaken… it hadn't been shaken at all.

Looking up at Iseldir, who was smiling, he shook his head. "I don't know what to do. I can't let him down again."

Iseldir leaned over to clap him on the shoulder.

"You won't."

XxX

Merlin remained awake for the majority of the night, his thoughts running wild in his head. He flitted between doubting himself and doubting his friend (which was quickly followed by an angry shake of the head and a move back the self-loathing), trying, desperately, to find a reason not to return to Camelot with Arthur.

And, as dawn broke and the camp came to life, Merlin finally gave in, packed his bag and went to say goodbye to the children.

He was going come.

XxX

He's stayed with the children whilst Arthur finished up his meetings with the druids, not wanting to distract any of his friends with his arrival. He'd let them move outside before he joined them. Several of the druids had jumped at the chance to prepare his horse for him, so Merlin had nothing else to do but wait.

Merlin remained amongst the crowd as the Knights left. He saw Arthur hand back and scan the crowd before heading out after them, and it just made him more certain of his choice. Arthur really did want him home.

The druids led his horse outside whilst he said one last goodbye to the children and the rest of the druids, Cathy clinging to his neck and making him promise to come back and visit soon before exiting the camp.

As he stepped out, he heard the Knights gasp, and Gwaine swear from where he was seated on his horse. Arthur's back was too him but Gwaine was staring at him, a look of utter disbelief plastered on his face. He smiled. "Is there room for one more?"

He saw Arthur tense up, before slowly turning round, his eyes taking in every inch of Merlin's form as if trying to convince himself that Merlin was really there, during which Gwaine swung down from his horse, edging towards the Warlock.

"Merlin?"

He grinned, as chorus of disbelieving laughs broke out among the group and the rogue grabbed his friend in a hug, pulling him close. Surprised, Merlin dropped his pack, and hesitated a moment before reciprocating.

As soon as Gwaine stepped back, Arthur was forward, drawing Merlin close. "I didn't think you were coming," he whispered.

"Neither did I," Merlin breathed, relief sweeping through his body. "But I couldn't let you down again."

"You have never let me down." Arthur drew back, placing both hands on his shoulders and smiling at him. "It was me that let you down."

"Arthur..." Merlin began to reply, but the rest of the Knights were on them, clapping the Warlock on the back and laughing. He glanced at Arthur before turning to face the rest of his friends.

"Merlin!"

"Where on earth have you been?"

"Have you been here the whole time?"

Merlin nodded, feeling sheepish. "I'm sorry I didn't tell you last night. It was a complete shock to see you all here! How did you find me?"

"Through the sheer power of intelligence, my friend!" Gwaine exclaimed, barging past Arthur and flinging his arm around Merlin's shoulders. "The others didn't have clue, but I, through the strong will of my mind..." A chorus of snickers cut him off and Gwaine looked affronted but his grin gave him away.

It took several minutes to break away from his friends, before he finally managed to turn back to his King, who was smiling fondly. "Are you ready to go home, Merlin?"

Home... He was going home. "Yeah, I'm ready."

XxX

The Knights enthusiasm didn't fade during the ride back to Camelot. Merlin did his best to answer every one of their questions, embellishing his tales and deliberately o the ones that would make his friends laugh.

Although the resulting requests to see Arthur with donkey ears caused a lot of glaring from the King.

A King, Merlin had noticed, that seemed to be frowning when he though no-one was looking at him. Not at Merlin, he didn't think. He'd have to talk to his friend about it when they camped for the night.

Arthur drew them to a halt in a clearing, a mile or so inside Camelot's boarders.

Once they'd dismounted, Merlin immediately began to collect up the water skins for re-filling, only for Gwaine to snatch them away. Startled, he tried to gather firewood instead, only for Elyan and Leon to push into a seating position, before heading into the surrounding trees. Percival was seeing to the horses, leaving a bemused Merlin sitting on a log in the middle of the camp.

It felt so surreal to be with his friends again, to see them doing his jobs for him, laughing and joking as if they'd never been apart. And to tell them the truth about their adventures together, and all the things he'd done behind the scenes… It was hard to take in.

"What made you change your mind?"

Merlin glanced at the ground, picking at the bark as Arthur sat down beside him, a smile gracing his face. "I honestly didn't think I'd ever make it home. And then you were there, telling me it was possible. I tried to ignore you, tried not to believe you, but I couldn't. The more I thought about what you'd said, the more I believed you, and then it suddenly seemed like a reality. Like I could go home... And once the thought was there, it wouldn't go away. And it was worth the risk."

Arthur smiled. "I'm glad. I didn't think you were going to come, but I didn't want to order you home. That wouldn't have been fair."

In the distance, they heard Gwaine's voice, loud and indignant, as if he'd been the butt of a joke, causing them both to laugh.

The silence stretch on for several minutes before Arthur spoke again. "You left some stuff out of your stories."

His tone was factual, not accusing. Merlin sighed, looking out across the campsite. "Yes."

"Because you didn't want to upset anyone."

Merlin shook his head. It was more than that. "It's hard to tell a story that's been kept secret for so long. Making it fun and including them made it easier to tell."

Arthur's eyes flicked between Merlin and the ground. "I'm sorry you found it so hard."

The Warlock immediately picked up on the guilt in his friend's voice and rolled his eyes. "Not this again, Arthur. It wasn't your fault. And this, what you're doing now... If it had been your fault, which it was not, this makes up for it."

Arthur leant forward, his hands clasped together and resting on his knees. "Have you decided what role you want when we get home? Gwen will want to make a big fuss, whether you want to be Gaius' apprentice, or my advisor, or maybe even Court Sorcerer..."

Role? He honestly hadn't thought about any of that. "Can't I just go back to being your servant?"

"What?" Arthur sounded incredulous, but what had he expected? "Are you serious? You can't be my servant, Merlin! You deserve so much more than that!"

"I want to be there as you usher in the golden age, Arthur! That's all I've ever wanted! I don't care where I am when it happens, I just want you and Gwen and everyone else to be happy. As long as you're happy, I'm happy." Merlin explained, smiling at his friend. Arthur reached over, gripping Merlin's shoulder.

"Are you honestly that thick? You can't really believe that your place is as my servant. What if my happiness depends on giving you a promotion? Will you take it then?"

Merlin sighed at his friend. "That's a low blow, Arthur."

"Will you take it?"

He laughed, shaking his head. "Alright. I'll be your Court Sorcerer."

"And my First Advisor."

"Arthur..." Merlin huffed. The King gave him a look, one eyebrow raised. "Fine. And your First Advisor."

The huge grin on Arthur's face made Merlin laugh as he slung his arm around the Warlock's shoulders. He shuffled closer to his King, his head resting on Arthur's shoulder.

They stayed that way until the Knights returned, when Merlin blinked himself out of his comfortable haze and stood, insisting that he helped the Knights cook dinner. He wanted it to be edible, after all.

The rest of the evening passed companionably, with his friends filling him in on everything that had happened since he left. It was comfortable and familiar and, for tonight, it was simple.

He couldn't wait to see what the future would bring.

XxX

The light-hearted conversation continued during the final stretch home.

As they entered the citadel, crowds gathered in the streets, cheering them as they passed by. Arthur had sent a scout that had been waiting for them ahead, with the news that the mission had been a success.

Merlin saw Gaius and Gwen as they rode into the courtyard, waiting for Arthur at the top of the stairs. He saw the shock on Gwen's face and the delighted surprise on Gaius', and ducked his head, focusing on the horses' mane in front of him.

They came to a halt, and Merlin swung down. As soon as his feet touched the ground, he felt Gwen slam into him, her arms wrapped around his neck.

"Where have you been?" she whispered, clutching his jacket.

Merlin tightened his grip, pulling her close. "I'm so sorry, Gwen."

He looked up as Gaius came up beside them, turning so he could face his mentor without Gwen having to let go. His mentors face was schooled, one eyebrow raised. "The druids?"

Merlin grinned at him, shrugging his shoulders and looking sheepish. "The one place no-one would think to look for me."

"And how did that work for you?"

"Horribly," he beamed.

And the Gaius was laughing, reaching out to pull his ward in close. Gwen took a step back, giving them more space as Merlin buried his head in Gaius' shoulder.

"I'm sorry."

"Shh…" Gaius stroked the back of Merlin's hair. "You have nothing to be sorry for. You did what you thought was best; you always have. And you've won. Magic is free." He tightened his grip. "I'm so proud of you, my boy." Merlin gave a wet laugh, brushing his eyes.

Over Gaius' shoulder, he saw Arthur and Gwen heading back to the castle. His mentor gave him a final pat on the shoulder before pushing him in the King's direction. He quickly fell into step beside his friend, heading up to the council chambers to report back on their mission. He sat by Arthur's side, smiling as his King drew up the plans for the next stage of reintroducing magic and the druids visit to Camelot next month.

Three weeks ago, he'd never imagined this, never thought he'd be back in this council room again, much less sitting at the table. And then he was standing, as Arthur put his arm around Merlin's shoulders and announced his new position to the Lords.

Looking back, he found he couldn't really remember those first few days back in Camelot. It had been a flurry of meetings, presentations and announcements. At some stage, he'd been moved from Gaius' chambers into his own, considerable larger ones. That same night, Gwen had insisted they eat together and he tried to answer her questions as best he could. Tears had been shed and there had been a moment when he couldn't breathe because she was hugging him so tightly, but they had both felt better afterwards, even if their eyes were slightly red.

It was more than he ever could have hoped for, and he wouldn't have it any other way.

XxX

He was leaning against the battlements when Iseldir found him. The druid had arrived in Camelot the previous day for his scheduled talks with Arthur.

In the last month, Arthur had made huge leaps in the process of legalising magic. More talks had been scheduled with the other Kingdoms in the coming months and Merlin had been responsible for drawing up most of the legislation. Today, however, Merlin had the morning off whilst Arthur met with Iseldir. The Warlock had his own meeting scheduled for later that day.

The druid came up beside him, resting against the wall.

"I wanted to thank you," Merlin said, still looking out over the citadel. "For finding me that day and taking me in. If it hadn't been for you, I wouldn't have been there when Arthur came. I would never had been given this opportunity."

Iseldir hummed. "It is I who should be thanking you for this opportunity. Your involvement in the Kings life gave our people hope for the first time in many years. I know that you felt like you'd let everyone down but this was always destiny's plan."

Merlin frowned. "Destiny? Did you know this was going to happen?"

"I had been asked to look after you until the King was ready."

He shook his head. "So you knew this was going to happen even when I was moping around the druid camp? Bloody dragon." Because, of course, who else would it be.

Iseldir's smile confirmed his theory. "He had your best interests at heart."

"First time for everything," he muttered darkly, but it didn't stop the small grin spreading across his face.

The druid laughed. "Indeed. Everything has worked out the way it was meant too."

Merlin nodded. "Thank you Iseldir."

He gave the Warlock one last smile before moving back towards the castle. "Your Highness." He bowed to Arthur who inclined his head back.

"That looked interesting."

"Just Kilgharrah being an interfering lizard."

"So… nothing new?"

Merlin laughed. "No, nothing new."

They stood there, watching the day to day activities in the lower town. So much had changed in the last month, yet nothing seemed to have changed at the same time.

Arthur gently bumped their shoulders together. "We'll get there Merlin. And I'll be there, with you, every step of the way. You won't be alone again."

"I know Arthur. 'Till the end of the line, right?"

Arthur smiled. "Yes, Merlin. 'Till the end of the line."

XxX

The End

XxX

It's finally done! Again, I am so sorry it has taken me so long. I'm hoping to have another one-shot (my prompt from two years ago… sorry) and complete next week, but no guarantees! Uni and work are taking up most of my free time at the moment, and for the 18 months.

This is the end of A Thousand Words. I'm afraid there won't be another chapter, as I don't want to drag it out, as it seems to naturally finish here. Sorry.

To everyone who stuck around long enough to read this story, thank you so much! Sorry about the cheesy ending, but I couldn't resist. The Winter Soldier is one of my favourite movies.

Please review!

TTFN
Valkyriexx