Epilogue One

The Next Morning, Penny's Apartment

"Morning, Mom."

"Morning, honey."

"Breakfast?"

"There's a plate warming in the oven. Ham, eggs & toast."

"You must've gotten up early. It's only 7."

"Yes, I wanted to get an early start. I think I've had enough of an adventure in California. I'm heading back to Omaha."

"To Dad?"

"I don't know yet. I hope so. For now I think I'll stay with your aunt. I sent your dad an email this morning and asked him to hold off on signing the divorce papers. I might have been a little hasty. I think maybe we should try to work through our problems."

"Mom, Dad and I spent a lot of time speaking to the new pastor at church. She's really nice and she was incredibly helpful. For both of us. I think maybe she could help you."

"That sounds like a good idea. I'm not sure your Dad is going to like what he hears. I did some really stupid things while I was out here."

"Mom, I specialized in stupid for a long time. I think I came out of it okay. As long as he hears it from you first I think it'll all work out. You still love him, right?"

"I'm pretty sure I do."

"I know he still loves you. I have faith that it'll all be okay. You just have to both be patient."

"Honey, enough about me. What are you going to do?"

"I have some meetings scheduled at the network today and we're going to talk. Sheldon's coming with me as my advisor. I think we'll figure something out. At the very least I'll be able to pay all of my bills for a while and get my car fixed. That'll certainly make Sheldon happy."

"Honey, I think you make Sheldon happy. I saw you two kiss last night. That was not a friend kiss."

"Mom, Sheldon and me getting involved romantically now isn't really a good idea for either of us for a bunch of reasons. What we have is working and both of us are happy. If it's meant to be more, it'll happen. I think I'm learning to be patient myself."

"Your father and I still want grandchildren from you."

"For now you'll just have to be satisfied with what you get from my sister. When it happens for me, it'll happen. I'm not in any hurry to force it. When I force it I end up with guys like Kurt and Leonard, who just aren't right for me."

"Honey, after what I've seen over the last few days, and especially yesterday., I know who the right guy for you is. And eventually I hope the two of you will figure it out. I'm willing to be patient just like you. And I won't push. And when we speak I'll ask your father not to push also, And I'll make sure he drops the "What about Leonard?" stuff. That young man has problems and you are not the solution to them."

"Don't I know it? I'm happy that chapter is finally over. Mom, stay one more day. I want to have a nice goodbye dinner for you with all of my friends. You should get to know what we're like when there isn't a crisis."

"Okay. But I sort of already know. Your blood family may live in Omaha, but you've got a lovely family in Pasadena too."

Epilogue Two

That evening. Apartment 4A.

The crew all gathered for dinner. Sheldon and Penny prepared a feast. There was something for everyone, even Leonard.

Bernadette spoke up.

"So Penny, is everything going to change now that you're a big TV writer?"

"Yeah, uh, no. Nothing's really going to change. I guess I should let you guys know what I decided, with Sheldon's help of course. We met with the network execs today and they made me a really nice offer. They really liked my original script and they offered me a development deal. They wanted to go back to the basics with the show. Blond from Nebraska moving across the hall from the beautiful mind genius type and his friend Leonard…"

"Hey!" Leonard interjected.

"Just funnin' with you Leonard. You have got to stop being so over-sensitive."

"Anyway they liked the original idea and wanted me to write a whole season of scripts before they put it into production. They offered to give me my own production company."

"Ooooh, my friend is going to be a big Hollywood mogul." said Amy.

"I hope you remember all us little people when you're famous, Penny." Said Howard without a trace or irony."

"Yeah, that's the thing. I, um, I turned them down."

"But that's your dream. To be famous. I don't understand, Penny."

"Amy, let me see if I can explain this, because it's not easy. When I wrote that script, I wrote it as a class project. I never had any intention of taking it further than that. It was an exercise. The way I see it, putting my life with you guys out there on tv is kind of an invasion of privacy, of all of our privacy. Maybe someday, when 2311 North Robles is just a memory for us, I'll write something about it. But now these are lives we're still living and none of you should have to wonder when you do something how it's going to look on tv, or how I'm going to interpret it. I don't want you to see me as the girl across the hall that's writing everything you do down, who has to make whatever you do funny. I think what it really comes down to is what we have here is special and I'm not going to share it with the world. At least not yet. And I would certainly never do it without your approval."

"Thank you, Penny. There aren't many who would sacrifice a lucrative career they've always dreamed of for the sake of their friends."

"Raj, I said I didn't take the deal. I'm not an idiot. The network was complicit in screwing me and they owe me big time. With Sheldon's assistance we came to an agreement in exchange for me not suing the pants off them and keeping quiet about everything."

"And about that, I need to ask you guys to not say anything about any of this outside of this group. No posting on Facebook or anywhere else. It's really a sensitive issue for the network and if it gets out it'll affect what I got from them, which I think is a pretty good deal."

"So what did you get?"

"First, I'm keeping the $25,000 that Hernly gave me. I'm using some of it to pay my bills, my rent, fix my car and pay a friend back who loaned me money when I really needed it. Sheldon has offered to invest the rest of it for me so that I can start building a nest egg."

"Also, when the network takes Hernly to court, if they get anything out of him, I'll get a big chunk of it. I'm not really expecting much there. I think all he really has left is a house in Sherman Oaks with some really bad water damage."

"The network believes that I have talent as a writer and sponsors a bunch of writing classes at City College taught by people from the industry who aren't sleaze balls. They've offered to pay my tuition and expenses to help me finally get my degree. And if I decide to go on with my education after that they'll foot the bill. So it's possible that someday I'll be a doctor like you guys. Sorry, Howard. They also promised to make sure that I'm informed about auditions for parts I'm appropriate for and to pay for my acting classes. I already have an audition scheduled for something Wil Wheaton is producing. And if and when I write something I want produced, they promised that they would meet with me to discuss it seriously. And this is the really cool part. Once a month I'm allowed to visit the costume department and take any shoes that they're done with."

"So basically, I still live across the hall. I still work at The Cheesecake Factory. And I still want to be a famous actress. It's just that now I'm a little more financially stable and I'm developing some other options. So that's the continuing story of Penny."

Epilogue Three

Later that same night. Penny's apartment.

"Amy ended our relationship agreement."

"Did she say why?"

"She said that when saw us kiss last night it looked like I felt something that she never saw in me before."

"Did you?"

"I think so. I'm not really sure what it was. I think part of it is that you are the closest friend I've ever had and the depth of feeling I have for you dwarfs what I feel for anyone but my mom, and my sister and my Meemaw. I'm not sure that Amy ever really had a chance."

"So what do you want to do about that, Sheldon?"

"Well Amy is going back to being a girl who is my friend. I do enjoy her company. I just harbor no romantic feelings for her and never really did."

"And what about me?"

"Penny, if I said I did not enjoy the kiss we shared last night I'd be lying, and you know what a difficult time I have with that."

"That's for sure."

"I'm just not all sure that I am capable of a typical boyfriend/girlfriend paradigm."

"Sheldon, I'll tell ya, I don't think I'm interested in the typical boyfriend/girlfriend paradigm anymore either. I've spent a big part of the last ten years either in crappy relationships or recovering from crappy relationships. I want something different. I want something special and I don't want to force it to happen."

"You like spending time with me, right?"

"Of course."

"I like spending time with you too. Let's just keep doing that. Let's not force it to be something it isn't or may not be ready to be. If something is meant to be for the two of us, it'll happen. I'm willing to leave it to fate."

"But Penny, I know you have physical needs that you wish to have sated and I don't think I can do that."

"Sheldon, I haven't been with anyone since Leonard left for the North Sea. I also think that all the drinking that I was doing inspired me to do things and I guess guys that I really didn't need to do. I don't do that anymore and I really don't miss it at all. Kissing you last night is the closest I've gotten and, believe me, that was a really good kiss. I'm satisfied to let that keep me going for a good while. Now I'll admit I wouldn't mind if you made a habit of doing that but I'm not going to demand it and I'm not going to force it."

"So are we a couple now?"

"How about we think of ourselves as two very close friends who are playing it by ear. When the opportunity arises, we'll do things together, but it's not required. And there's no relationship agreement. We are inventing something new for us alone."

"I believe I can agree to that."

"One thing though. And this is an unbreakable rule."

"What would that be?"

"Nobody comes between us. Not Leonard. Not Amy. Not anyone. Ever."

"Penny, would this be one of those occasions when a kiss would be appropriate?"

"Kiss away. Moonpie."

A/N: That's it! Hope you enjoyed it. I'll be back soon with The Non-Coincident Theorem. Very fluffy. Very dark. Very Shenny. Nobody dies.