The Gift
New York City,
November 17, 2009
"And where are you going all dressed up?" Lena's voice floated across the bedroom as she pulled on her suit's jacket.
"I have a lunch date." Angela replied as she finished buttoning her purple silk shirt.
Lena moved across the room to stand behind Angela at the mirror. "Should I be jealous?" She smiled and pulled the younger woman into a hug.
"Well…" Angela teased. She turned around to face Lena without breaking the embrace.
"I see," Lena feigned a pained expression. "I have to go to LA for a few days and you waste no time finding someone else to spend your time with."
"I have to do something to keep my mind off you being away. How am I supposed to fill 4 long days?"
"You, My Angel, declined my offer to fly away with me to beautiful Los Angeles last week." Lena kissed Angela on the forehead.
"I know. It would be nice, but I know you'll be stuck in tons of meetings and we wouldn't have time to do anything." Angela said, rising to her tip-toes to return the kiss. "Actually, this is just an old high school friend. I had lost contact with her shortly after graduation, and she found me on that school site I registered on a while back. She suggested we get together for lunch today."
"That will be nice to reconnect with someone from high school." Lena said, breaking the embrace. She reached behind Angela, picked up a brush, and fondly runs it through Angela's hair.
"I suppose. We weren't extremely close this girl and I, but I guess it would be cool to catch up on some things." Angela stated as she gave her lover a quizzical look. "Why are you brushing my hair?"
"Because I want to." Lena stated matter-of-factly.
Noticing the time on the clock, Angela gently stopped Lena brushing with her hands.
"We're going to be late. Casey is dropping you off at the airport, and then taking me to Taylorsville. I'll be staying there the night, and coming back tomorrow. So…"
She kisses Lena softly on the lips.
"…if you can find the time to call me while you're living it up in LA, call my cell."
Rolling her eyes, she pulls her into a hug.
"I'll be calling you every free moment I have." Smiling, she kissed her again.
Pine Valley
November 18, 2009
Angela sat patiently waiting for her appointment. Looking around, she took in the elegance of the headquarters of one of the biggest industries in the world, Enchantment Enterprises. Hung above the receptionist's desk was a large, almost life size portrait of its founder, Erica Kane. It was very easy to see where Bianca got her looks. Her eyes wandered along the wall from beautiful pieces of art, to the directory near the hallway. CFO caught her attention, and she was immediately pulled back to Poland when she first met Lena, a former CFO for Enchantment.
Gilford Industries, Film Production division, Poland,
July 21, 2005
The entire room burst into laughter, but Angela wasn't sure why. Sure the joke was cute, but not incredibly funny. As she looked up from her desk, she immediately saw this incredibly beautiful brunette. She thought her name was Lena Kundera, the new CFO. Angela's pulse quickened as Lena turned her way and their eyes met. Feeling like a child that had just been caught stealing cookies from the jar, Angela blushed and immediately returned her eyes to the reports on her desk. Before she could fully register the words on the papers that littered her desk, Lena Kundera had moved from the middle of the room to the front of Angela's desk. Feeling her presence, Angela looked up and sheepishly smiled.
"Miss Campbell, I don't believe we've been properly introduced. I'm Lena Kundera. I work on the 4th floor."
Lena extended her hand. Stifling a laugh, she realized that she had caught the young woman off guard.
Angela sat in awe, disbelieving her eyes or ears. No one in the office really gave her the time of day unless they needed something. She was overlooked by everyone. Now, not only was someone speaking to her it just happened to be one of the most beautiful women she had ever seen. Before she could gather enough courage to actually speak, Lena added with a smile, "I don't bite."
A few more seconds passed, before Angela finally rose from her chair and shook Lena's hand.
"I'm sorry, Ms. Kundera. I, uh, well…..I….."
Angela struggled with her speech. Finally composing herself, she managed some coherent language.
"It's nice to meet you, Ms. Kundera."
Releasing Lena's hand, Angela continues.
"I'm sorry, I'm not at all with it today."
"It's quite alright, Miss Campbell, everyone has a day like that once in a while." Lena smiled again.
"Please, call me, Angela, Ms. Kundera." Angela insisted, with another smile.
"Angela?"
Lena returned the smile.
"I'm on my way to lunch, would you care to join me? I need to get out for a bit and would enjoy the company. Oh, and you can call me Lena."
Lena had made the conscious decision the previous night that she would, no matter how hard, move on. She couldn't spend the rest of her life pining for Bianca Montgomery.
Surprised by the invitation, Angela turned around expecting someone else to be on the receiving end.
"Me?"
Lena smirks sarcastically and smiles.
"Yes, you. If you have other plans, I understand."
She was starting to feel that she had been a bit too forward with this young woman. That's it Lena, scare her off before you even get to know her, she silently scolded herself.
"Oh, yes….I mean….." Angela stammered. She was so nervous, that her hands began shaking slightly.
"I….well…."
Angela stopped herself and took a deep breath gathering her courage, finally managing to get out.
"I'd love to."
Pine Valley
Enchantment Enterprises
November 18, 2009
The receptionist hung up the phone and looked over at Angela.
"Miss Montgomery will see you now." The words pulled Angela back to the present and she stood, gathered her strength as she breathed in a hearty amount of air. She walked toward the door leading to Bianca Montgomery's office. Placing her hand on the doorknob, she took another deep breath then opened the door.
Hearing the door open, Bianca stood and smiled. This meeting was completely unexpected. Angela Campbell had unexpectedly called yesterday afternoon and asked to speak with her citing: "it was a matter of great importance." Moving from behind her desk, Bianca extended her hand as she closed the distance with the young woman, who she determined couldn't be any older than herself.
"Good morning, Miss Campbell. I'm Bianca Montgomery."
Angela smiled as she laid eyes on Bianca Montgomery for the first time. She had seen pictures of Bianca in the photo albums that Paulina had kept, but seeing her in person, well, the pictures did not do her justice. Bianca was even more beautiful in person. It was evident being in her presence why Lena was so taken with her.
Quickly remembering why she was there, Angela extended her arm and grasped Bianca's hand. They shook hands, as Angela began to speak.
"Miss Montgomery, I really appreciate you seeing me this morning. I realize that my request is shrouded in mystery, but…" Angela paused for a quick moment, gathering her nerve yet again, and then continued.
"As I told your secretary yesterday afternoon this is very important."
"I'll admit you have piqued my curiosity. So," Bianca motions for Angela to take a seat in the chair in front of her desk. "Miss Campbell, what can I do for you?" Once Angela was seated, Bianca took her place behind the desk, closed the folders in front of her and gave Angela her undivided attention.
"It's about Lena." Angela began.
Lena's name brought showers of memories that had been locked away for the past 5 years. Her pulse quickened, as a quiet gasp of air entered Bianca's lungs. "Lena?" She studied the young woman's face for some unsaid explanation. "Is…is she okay?" her voice filled with concern.
Angela smiled. "Yes, Miss Montgomery, she's fine. She's actually doing quite well. Lena is currently working for Gilford Enterprises as their CFO. She was transferred to their New York office from London just this past January."
Bianca breathed a sigh of relief. "Good. How is her mother?"
Angela lowered her head. "Mrs. Kundera passed away 3 years ago." Her lips quivering and eyes welling with tears as she spoke. "Lena and I were with her."
Tears welled in Bianca's eyes. Her voice was barely audible, "I'm so sorry."
"It was pretty tough for Lena at first, but she eventually reasoned that her mother was in a much better place. She told me that she knew that her Mama and Papa were together again."
Angela reached up and wiped away a few tears that had spilled over.
Bianca smiled hearing that Lena knew her parents were together again.
"Miss Campbell, are you alright?"
Angela finally raised her head as she wiped away a few more rogue tears.
"Yes, I'm okay. Please forgive me, sometimes Mrs. Kundera's passing overwhelms me and…she was like a mother to me."
"It's okay, I understand." Bianca interjected.
"Thanks."
Angela said, allowing herself to smile.
"Usually, I can keep my emotions in check, but today…..well…you can see how that has turned out."
Bianca smiled reassuringly at this young woman and quietly waited for her to continue. She studied the young woman's face, trying to capture an explanation about the reason she was here to talk about Lena.
Angela swallowed hard when she realized that she hadn't said anything more and Bianca was staring at her. "Oh, I'm sorry, Miss Montgomery. You must think I'm completely off my rocker or something. I didn't mean to get off topic."
Bianca smiled again as she said, "It's okay, Miss Campbell, whenever you're ready to continue."
Angela straightened herself in the chair and absent-mindedly ran her fingers through her brown hair. Releasing a heavy sigh, she finally said, "I came to ask you a favor, Miss Montgomery. I'll be going away soon; and I want…no, I need to know that she will be happy and loved."
Bianca gave Angela a quizzical look, then asked.
"Going? Like transferring to a different office or something?"
"Permanently." Angela started. "Miss Montgomery…"
"Miss Campbell," Bianca interjects quickly. Rising, she briskly walks around her desk to stand beside Angela. "Please, call me Bianca. And let's talk over here." Bianca motioned to the couch along the wall. "It's much more comfortable." She extended her hand to Angela.
"Only if you'll call me Angela."
Bianca nodded and the two women moved across the room to the couch.
Once seated, Bianca spoke again.
"Why come to me now? We haven't spoken in years, and when we last did, she broke up with me. She called and wanted me to come to Poland and I…"
Bianca paused as the memories of the phone call washed over her, tears welled in her eyes and her heart constricted. Fighting the tears, she swallows raggedly and clears her throat. Looking in Angela's eyes
"…I couldn't; and then, we were over. That was it; over."
Angela's mind immediately wandered to the night Lena had told her about the phone call.
Poland
Angela's Apartment,
November 2006
Lena lounged on the couch reading a magazine while waiting for Angela to finish getting ready for their dinner date. Lena had arrived a bit earlier than Angela expected, so she wasn't entirely ready.
"I'm almost done." Angela called from the bedroom.
"Take your time."
Lena called back, as she turned a page in her magazine. The name Bianca caught her attention on the page, and immediately, she was transported back 2 years and the phone conversation she regrets ever took place. Tears welled in her eyes as the final conversation she had with Bianca replayed in her mind.
Angela entered the living room smiling, but it immediately disappeared when she saw Lena wiping tears from her cheeks hurriedly. She stood quietly, not letting her presence known as she watched her girlfriend.
Lena took a deep breath and exhaled. Distracted, she went back to her magazine oblivious that Angela had witnessed her emotional display.
As quietly as she could manage, Angela snuck up behind Lena and wrapped her arms around her neck. Kissing her lightly on the cheek, she whispered into her ear, "Are you okay?"
Squeezing Angela's hands lovingly, Lena managed a meek smile, "Yes, I'm fine." She brought Angela's hands to her lips and kissed them softly.
After kissing Lena's cheek again, Angela removed her arms and took a seat next to Lena. Not exactly sure how she should proceed, she opted for the straight forward approach.
"I saw you crying, Hon. What's wrong?"
Lena bowed her head, and began fidgeting with the magazine in her lap. "It's nothing." She paused for a moment to gather her strength, and then looked up at Angela.
"So, are you ready for dinner? The reservations are for 7.30."
Angela smiled, leaned into Lena and kissed her lips softly. "What I'm ready for is for you to tell me what's wrong."
"It's nothing really." She looked into Angela's eyes, seeing that she didn't buy it. "Really, my Angel, I'm fine."
"Please don't keep things from me. Something is bothering you, something has upset you, please, let me help."
Angela pleaded, uselessly; Angela had only seen her cry once before at Paulina's funeral. She took Lena's hands in her own and held them tightly to her chest.
"Please let me help."
Lena smiled reluctantly. She had two options: she could tell Angela that she was missing her mother, or she could tell the truth. It would be easier to go with option number one, but she felt compelled to be completely honest with Angela. She had mentioned Bianca as a girlfriend before, but it was only in passing, nothing more than a name amongst many others. Finally succumbing to her decision, Lena sighed loudly.
"Okay, but I'm embarrassed."
Lena broke free from Angela's hold, and rose from the couch.
"I saw a name in the magazine that brought back a tremendously bad memory of a phone call I made several years ago."
She moved across the room to the window, looking out onto the city below watching cars and people hurriedly passing by.
"It had been a long day; Mama had finally drifted off to sleep and I was exhausted, but couldn't sleep. I was missing Bianca terribly and growing tired of being without her. We had had a fight a couple of weeks previous about her not coming here to visit, and I sent her an e-mail saying that it was urgent that I speak with her."
She folded her arms across her abdomen and sighed.
Angela watched her intently; her heart ached to hear the pain in Lena's voice.
"It was around 4 in the morning when I finally called."
Lena paused. She felt guilty for the feelings that she still had for Bianca, even more so now that she was with Angela.
Angela rose from the couch and moved up behind Lena at the window. She put her arms around the older woman's waist, hugging her tightly.
"Are you sure you really want to hear this?" Lena asked never taking her eyes away from the street below.
"Yes, Lena, I do." She kissed Lena's neck then rested her chin on her shoulder.
"When Bianca answered the phone, she immediately asked about my mother. I assured her that she was doing well. I guess all the tiredness, loneliness, hurt and even a bit of anger was evident in my voice, because she told me I was scaring her." Lena paused. She couldn't believe she was explaining this to her current girlfriend.
Angela sensed Lena's increasing difficulty to discuss the event, but she felt if she could just get it off her chest, she might start to heal. She kissed her girlfriend once more on the neck, and then rested her chin back on her shoulder, waiting patiently for Lena to continue.
"I wanted to be with her so badly."
She drew in a deep breath and sighed raggedly.
"She told me I was scaring her, and the next thing I know I'm asking her to leave that night. She said she couldn't because Babe needed her."
"Babe?"
Angela laughed. The image of a life-sized Barbie doll popped into her head.
"What did she need? Help finding her nail file?" She laughed again, but stifled it when she felt Lena's muscle's tense.
"I'm sorry, Lena. It's just…..sorry, please go on."
Lena took deep breath and tried to relax before continuing.
"She told me that Babe needed her. I told her I missed her; wanted her and that I…"
A tear spilled down Lena's cheek. Angela instinctively pulled Lena closer.
"…I needed her."
She beat her fist against her chest. Another tear escaped.
"She told me that she knew that, but I could hear it in her voice; she wasn't going to come to Poland. I snapped. I wouldn't let her tell me that she loved me. I said I wanted to be happy and I was tired of waiting and that was it, I ended it. I remember her asking me if that was what I wanted, and at that moment it was."
She paused for a moment as she wiped the other tears that had escaped. Angela tightened her arms around Lena and placed another kiss on her shoulder.
"Her last words to me were 'You're still in my heart Lena'. I hung up the phone before she could say anything else. I honestly don't remember if I even said good-bye."
Again, she took a deep breath trying to clear her mind of the bad memory. Moving her hands to Angela's, she took them in her own and brought them to her lips, kissing them softly.
Poland
Angela's Apartment
Late Summer 2006
"Well, I hope you enjoyed dinner."
Angela said as she moved between the table and sink clearing up the dinner dishes.
"I wanted make you a dinner that I loved when I was a kid."
Lena smiled.
"It was very good. I've never had black eyed peas before."
She picked up the silverware and followed Angela to the sink.
"It definitely something I would like to have again."
She dropped the forks into the sink, and then turned around to face Angela as she leaned against the counter. Lena reached out and took Angela's hand and pulled her close.
"You're too good to me." She leaned in and kissed Angela gently on the lips.
Once Angela broke from the kiss, she looked up at Lena and grinned.
"Yes, hon, I am."
Lena laughed, and pulled Angela into her arms again.
"You know, if you keep me tied up here, the dishes will never get done and we'll never make it to the movie tonight."
Lena smiled wickedly.
"I think I like the idea of keeping you tied up."
Angela laughed, and pushed herself up onto her toes and kissed Lena.
"I like that idea, as well, but I'll make you a deal. You help me finish up here and we'll skip the movie to try out this 'tied up' thing." Angela suggested with a mischievous wink. Before Lena could agree, Angela broke free from Lena's gentle grasp and began washing the dishes.
Lena watched the young woman scrubbing the dishes. Her mind drifted back to Pine Valley and how much Angela reminded her of Bianca; the height, the dark hair, warm brown eyes and just little things she would say and do, even to the point of being a spoiled brat on occasion. Once Lena got past the shyness, she got to know a beautiful young woman who loved life, loved her job, and loved her family even though they had disowned her.
"Hey, where did you go to?" Angela asked, as she flipped water playfully into Lena's face.
'Huh' was all Lena could manage before the tiny water droplets assaulted her face.
She howled as she wiped the water from her face. "Hey!"
Lena reached over, soaked her hand in the dishwater, and then proceeded to return fire.
"Is that how it's going to be?"
She laughed, and soaked her hand in the water once again.
"I don't answer your question in a timely matter, so you splash water in my face?"
She sprayed Angela again with water as she emphasized the last word.
Angela moved in, soaked her hands again, and ran past Lena to the living room, flinging water with a flip of her wrist. "Yes, this is how it's going to be."
Lena chased her. And as Angela got near the couch, Lena had caught up with her. Grabbing her hands, she pulls them both down on to the couch. Angela flicked her fingers in vain, and the water droplets landed on her shirt, far from where she intended. They burst into laughter as the struggle continued; and after several minutes, the struggle ceased. Angela met Lena's eyes with a smile, and leaned in to kiss her.
Intended as a mere peck of a kiss, Angela was surprised to feel her hands released, and pulled tightly against Lena intensifying the kiss. After a few minutes, Angela broke the kiss.
"What was that for?"
"For being you."
Lena smiled. She allowed herself to drown in Angela's eyes. She was pulled out of the warm murky pools by a nudge on the arm.
"You're beautiful."
Angela lowered her head as her cheeks began to get a rosy color. No one had called her beautiful. Sure she had heard the complement from family, but of course that's not the same. Lena cupped Angela's chin and brought her head up to meet her eyes. She couldn't look Lena in the eyes, and she lowered them to her lap, watching her hands rub together in nervousness.
"Hey, what's wrong?" Using her free hand, Lena loving placed her hand on Angela's to still them. "Look at me." Her voice was soft and loving. "I didn't mean to embarrass you, I was only speaking the truth."
Slowly, Angela raised her eyes to meet Lena's. "Lena, it's just really hard to hear that. I know what I look like." She reached to her side and pinched the 'love handles' around her waist.
"Then you are not seeing the real you, my Angel. You are truly a beautiful woman." Lena squeezed Angela's hands lovingly. "I've known this since the first time I saw you at Gilford."
Still in disbelief, Angela looked down again at herself.
"Whatever you say, Lena."
Pine Valley
Bianca's Office, Enchantment
November 18, 2009
"Let me address your first question. "Am I leaving Lena? The answer would be yes, I'm leaving and she knows it, but she doesn't realize how soon it will actually be." Angela swallowed hard and continued.
"You see, Bianca..."
Bianca's office door slammed open and a young girl ran into the rooming hollering.
"Mama! Mama! We're back!"
She was quickly followed in by a young light brown haired woman.
"Miranda!"
The woman realized that they had interrupted something then quickly added: "I'm sorry, B, she tore free from my hand before I knew it."
Miranda had climbed into Bianca's lap before this young woman had finished speaking. "I'm sorry, Angela. Miranda knows better than to burst into a room like this, right, Sweetie? Now, apologize to Miss Angela."
"I'm sorry, Miss Angela." Miranda said sincerely.
Angela smiled. "It's alright."
"Angela, this is my daughter, Miranda." Bianca said beginning the unexpected introductions.
Angela extended her hand to the little girl.
"Nice to meet you, Miranda. I'm Angela." Miranda accepted the offered hand.
Then, looking over to the young woman still standing near the door.
"Maggie, this is Angela. Angela, this is Maggie."
Angela stood as Maggie crossed the room to greet her.
"It's nice to meet you, Angela. I'm sorry, for interrupting. Miranda couldn't wait to come in and tell her mom about the day we had."
Angela smiled.
"It's nice to meet you, too. And don't worry, I understand."
Angela couldn't believe she was meeting one of the women that seemed to always come between Bianca and Lena. She was beginning to doubt her sources on the information she had about Maggie. Lena's lawyer, Charles Killian, had assured her that Maggie wasn't with Bianca anymore. Now, it seems that they were indeed still an item.
"Miranda, let's go down to the cafeteria and get something to drink so your mom can continue with her meeting. You can tell her all about the monkeys and zebras later, ok?" Maggie said as she walked over to take Miranda's hand.
"But." Miranda said.
"No, buts, young lady. Go with your Aunt Mags, and you can tell me all about it later. OK?" Bianca kissed the girl on the cheek. She lifted the little girl into Maggie's waiting arms. "Thanks, Maggie."
"No, problem. Again, I'm sorry we interrupted. Alice wasn't at her desk to even warn us that you were in a meeting." Maggie said on her way to the door.
"It's okay." Bianca said, and looked apologetically at Angela.
"No worries." Angela said as Maggie exited, closing the door behind her.
"I, uh, well, I guess you know who Maggie is." Bianca felt the need to explain her presence.
"Lena has mentioned her, so yeah, I guess I kinda do."
Angela knew about Maggie, most she learned from Lena, but a little from Paulina too. Then, Charles had done some research on her and discovered that she and Bianca had been in a relationship that was on and off since they had lived in Paris. From his sources, Maggie was to have left Bianca again for some guy she met in school.
"She wanted to spend some time with Miranda before she left on her vacation, so..."
Bianca began, again feeling that she needed to explain her ex-girlfriend to this stranger.
"Maggie loves Miranda, so I don't feel that I should keep her from seeing her even if we aren't together. Maggie is like a second mom to her."
"There is no need to explain." Angela stated.
"Actually, this kind of makes what I want to say easier." Angela took a deep breath and continued. "See, Bianca what I was trying to say before is…I'm dying."
Bianca instinctively reached over and reassuringly squeezed Angela's hand. "I'm…..I'm sorry. Isn't there anything…a doctor or something?"
She really wasn't exactly sure what to say and felt her heart ache for this woman she didn't even know.
"It's okay. We've known for quite some time. Lena has been wonderful to me. She sought out the best doctors, treatments, everything, but there isn't anything anyone can do now. It's just a matter of time before I'll have to go, and I've come to terms with that. I think on a certain level, Lena has as well."
She paused as her mind began to wander to the day she had told Lena how she wanted to spend her final days.
Swiss Hospital,
April 2009
"Thanks, doctor." Angela smiled sadly.
"I really wish there was something more we could do." The older gentleman placed his hands on Angela's squeezing them trying to provide some comfort.
"I think in the back of mind that I've always known there wasn't anything that anyone could do. It's just my time, that's all. The Lord wants me with him, so that's that." She smiled in understanding.
"Well, I know Ms. Kundera will be here in a few minutes. Are you sure you don't want me to be here when you tell her?" He asked.
"No, no. I've got to tell her this on my own." She said.
"Okay, but if you need me, ring the nurse and I'll be here as soon as I can."
"Thanks." And he left.
Angela's mind wandered to Lena and how she thought her reaction would be to the decision she had made. Lena hadn't able to be with Angela when the latest tests results came in due to some urgent situation in Gilford's London office, so this had given her ample time to contemplate the exact wording of the 'speech' she was going to give Lena.
It didn't seem like very long, perhaps 15 minutes, before Lena entered the room smiling mischievously carrying a small backpack. Making sure the door had securely closed behind her.
"I had to bring you this."
Reaching inside the bag, she pulled out a small bowl of banana pudding.
Angela's eyes lit up as a big smile enveloped her face. "Oh, honey, you remembered!" Angela eagerly accepted the offered bowl.
"Of course." Lena said, sitting down next to Angela on the bed. She kissed Angela on the temple.
"How could I let My Angel go without her favorite food?"
"You're spoiling me." Angela leaned into Lena kissing her tenderly on the lips.
"I can't help myself. Now, eat up, before we get busted by the nurse." Lena laughed.
As Angela digs into her sweet dessert Lena asks, "Have you talked to the doctor today?" Angela's demeanor change did not go unnoticed by her lover.
"Yeah, he came by just a bit ago." She avoided making eye contact, and took a large bite of pudding.
Lena studied her young lover trying to read what she wasn't saying. "The tests came in while I was in London, yes?" She paused, for a moment.
"Why didn't you call me? Or ask Dr. Elver to wait until I got back so we could hear the news together?"
Still avoiding Lena's gaze, "Because, I needed some time to think about what it all meant."
"You should have called me. We should have heard the results together." Lena's voice was saturated with hurt.
Angela reached over, grasped Lena's hand and pulled it to her chest. "Sweetheart," Angela began her practiced speech, as she finally got the nerve to look Lena in the eyes. "You have made sure that I have had the best doctors, the best treatments, the best of everything but it's just not working. The tests came back just like they have since the beginning. I'm not getting any better."
"Then we'll find other doctors, other treatments…" Lena protested.
"No, honey, that's it." Angela kissed the back of Lena's hand.
"I'm sure we've only scratched the surface." Lena interrupted, her eyes welling with tears.
"Lena, honey, I'm tired. I'm tired of being poked and prodded; of being in beautiful countries and only seeing them from a hospital window."
Angela set the bowl next to the bed, and then maneuvered herself so that she was on her knees facing Lena. She brushed Lena's tears away.
"We've always known this was a possibility." She kissed Lena softly on the lips.
"I have given this a lot of thought. I can spend the rest of my days going from hospital to hospital, trying treatment after treatment with no guarantee that any of it will work. Or, I can spend the rest of my days living life."
Lena sat in silence, staring deep into Angela's eyes. "Please, My Angel…" she pleaded as she leaned in to kiss Angela.
After a few moments Angela broke free from the kiss. "Honey…"
Lena silenced Angela by placing a finger on her lips. "My Angel, I love you; you're my world." Lena smiled sadly and reluctantly gave in. "Your wish is my command."
This time Angela initiated a kiss that lasted for what seemed like hours. Lena caressed Angela's face and smiled. "Finish your pudding."
Angela took Lena's hand and kissed the back of it softly.
"Okay." She moved around to settle back into the pillows, and snuggle into Lena's arms.
Once Angela began eating again, Lena said, "Okay, there will be no more hospitals, no more tests and we'll do whatever you want to do. I'll talk to Richard about taking an extended leave."
Angela swallowed her pudding quickly. "But..."
Lena cut her off. "There is no need to worry, we have plenty of money. Richard and his brothers have been extremely understanding about us, so I know this won't be a problem."
"I know they have. We've been incredibly blessed to have a company that recognizes us as a couple, and gives you time off to be with me at the hospital and go with me to all the appointments. But, I want you to continue to work."
Angela paused and then smiled. "Ever since I was little I always dreamed of being a housewife; cooking, cleaning and all that stuff. I even thought about children at one point, but since I got sick, I realized children are out of the question, but maybe just maybe I could be that housewife, at least for a little while."
Angela took a few bites of her pudding while she watched Lena. Angela broke the silence.
"Don't get me wrong, hon, I still want to go places like Greece and Australia, but I want us to be a 'normal' couple, ok?"
"Anything for you, My Angel."
Pine Valley
Bianca's Office, Enchantment
November 18, 2009
Bianca stared at the young woman. She's so young, she thought to herself, Lena must be devastated; first her mom and now her girlfriend. Bianca couldn't help but feel sympathy for Angela, and Lena.
"I'm sorry, sometimes I lose track of what I'm saying." Angela stated. "You see, Bianca, I'm here…" She paused for a moment raking together her courage to continue. "You'd think as many times as I've said this, gone over it in my head, I'd be able to just spit it out."
Bianca reached over and squeezed Angela's hand.
"Take your time." Bianca said reassuringly. Eyeing the pitcher of water on the table beside them, she asked, "Would you like some water?"
Angela smiled. "Yes, thank you."
Bianca rose from the couch and proceeded to pour them both a glass of water.
"Bianca, I really do appreciate you seeing me and being patient with me. I'm sure the last thing you thought I would be here to discuss with you is Lena."
"It wasn't foremost on my mind, no."
Bianca handed Angela a glass. It had been 5 years since she had spoken to Lena. Her life had been filled with taking care of Miranda, working and the on again/off again relationship with Maggie.
Angela took a sip of water.
"Look, Bianca, I love Lena. I love her so much that sometimes I think I'll explode and I know she loves me, but…" Angela paused. "But, she's not in love with me."
Bianca was shocked at the woman's confession and the matter-of-factly way she said it was even more baffling.
"The last 4 years of my life have been more than I ever expected to have even if I had lived to be 100 years old. See, I believe that The Lord works through people; and because I believe that, I know that Lena was sent to me so that I wouldn't have to spend my final days alone and isolated from my family. Lena is my family. Also I believe that in turn, Lena found me so that I could be the one to bring her back together with her true love." Angela locked with Bianca's eyes hoping that she would know that what she said was true.
"Angela, I don't…" Bianca started.
"Please, Bianca. I can see it in your eyes and I can feel it. I don't know how, but I do, I know you still love Lena. You're supposed to be together."
Bianca didn't want to admit it, but she was still in love with Lena. She had tried to move on after Lena broke up with her. She had moved to Paris with Maggie. She was going to work at Cambius Industries, and she and Maggie were going to raise Miranda together; they were going to be a family. But, inevitably it turned out the way it always did with Maggie, she couldn't commit and Bianca, on some levels, was relieved. She never felt forever with Maggie; that feeling only happened once and she let it slip away.
"I guess what I'm trying to say is, please give you and Lena another chance. This is something that I need to know before I actually leave. I need to know that Lena is going to be with someone, someone she loves." Angela paused for a moment. "God, I know this sounds crazy, but…"
"Angela, I can't just get back with Lena because you want it." Bianca said. "There are so many things that…"
"I realize that it's been 5 years, lots has happened, you got your little girl back, you tried to work things with Maggie, you ran Cambius in Paris, Lena stayed in Poland, she and I got together. You know that things just weren't right. Things weren't completely right with you and Maggie and things weren't right with me and Lena. It's hard to have a solid relationship when one person is in love with someone else. As I said earlier, in a round about way, things happen for a reason."
Poland
Hospital
January 29, 2010
Angela lays restless on the soaked hospital sheets and pillow. She mumbled incoherently as Lena held her hand. Lena whispered in Angela's ear.
"It's okay, my angel, everything is going to be alright."
Angela had been feverish for the past two days, but during the night her temperature had shot up to 105 degrees, so Lena rushed her to the hospital. After several hours, Angela had been moved to her own room and Lena was now awaiting the doctor's decision on how they planned to proceed with Angela's treatments.
"Lena, where are you?" Angela looked around anxiously, not recognizing Lena.
"I'm right here, my angel." Lena kissed her on the cheek.
"Please don't leave me, Lena, please don't leave me." Angela's voice faded into a whisper.
"Never, my angel. Never." Lena reassured her young lover as she kissed her cheek again and squeezed her hand.
Lena had been standing next to Angela's bed since they arrived at the hospital. Nurse after nurse encouraged Lena to sit down and rest, but she refused. She would not rest until Angela was feeling better.
Finally, Doctor Spivey entered. "Ms. Kundera?"
Lena turned to him pleading, "You have to do something."
He motioned for her to step into the hallway with him.
"I'll be right back, My Angel." Lena kissed Angela's forehead and brushed the sweat from her brow.
Following Doctor Spivey into the hall, Lena stopped for a moment to look back at Angela as a nurse entered her room.
"Ms. Kundera, after discussing Angela's set back with Doctor Kovak, the only option would be for an experimental medication that has only given the slightest indication that it will work in patients with Angela's condition. It has only a 3% chance of working.
Tears burned Lena's eyes as he began explaining the side effects and her mind drifted to the day Angela told her the news.
London
Angela & Lena's Flat
September 24, 2007
Hearing the door open, Angela quickly wiped her tears and downed the remaining contents of her wine glass.
"My angel, I'm home," Lena called from the foyer. "…and I'm famished. I had to work through lunch; and as you can see I'm late."
Lena entered the kitchen smiling. Angela's back was to Lena, stirring something that smelled delicious to Lena. "Supper will be ready in a few." Angela said without turning around.
"It smells divine." Lena sauntered up behind Angela and wrapped her arms around her young lover's waist, kissing her on the nape of the neck. Angela smiled sadly and melted into Lena's arms.
"How was your day, my angel?" Lena kissed her again.
Angela took a deep breath and turned around to face Lena.
"It was ok. I missed you terribly."
She wrapped her arms around her girlfriend's waist and buried her face into Lena's shoulder.
"What's wrong?" Lena asked lovingly caressing Angela's back.
Angela couldn't speak. She knew if she even tried the tears would start and she wouldn't be able to stop.
"My love, what's wrong?" Lena's concern was growing. She gently forced Angela off her shoulder so she could look her in the eye.
Tears began to stream down her cheeks. "Lena…" Angela's voice cracked. "Lena, I have cancer."
It felt as if someone had just punched her in the chest.
Poland
Hospital
January 29, 2010
After a few moments of silence, Lena finally spoke. "So, if she isn't given the medication I will definitely lose her. And, if you give her the medication there is still a chance I can lose her?"
"Yes."
"Give it to her." Lena said as she turned to watch Angela sleeping fitfully through the window.
"You're sure?" The side effects…"
Lena turned back to him with anger in her eyes, cutting him off.
"I heard you the first time, Doctor. If there is any chance of her staying with me, I want it." She paused momentarily and wiped the tear that had escaped. "Give her the medication."
The doctor walks away as Lena tries to compose herself. She wiped her eyes, took a deep breath and pushed the door open.
Angela was asking the nurse to call her mother. The nurse looked helplessly at Lena. Lena smiled sadly, crossed the room, took Angela's hand and squeezed it. "My Angel, I'll call your mother, ok?"
"Thank you, honey." Angela said as she drifted off to sleep once more.
Lena kissed Angela on the forehead as she caressed her hand. She looked up and the nurse quickly returned to reviewing Angela's chart. Stealing a side glance, she realized Lena was watching her.
"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to stare. It's just…" the nurse began.
Lena opened her mouth to speak, but the nurse quickly continued. "It's just I haven't seen love like this in a long time."
Lena smiled, "She's my…my… Mój anioł, my Angel."
The nurse smiled, "If you need anything just let me know. And if you'd like a quiet place to call her mother, come down to our station and you can use Doris's office.
A tear trailed down Lena's cheek. "Thank you, but that won't be necessary."
"Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't realize her mother had passed."
"She hasn't." Lena's voice was filled with disdain. Reading the confused look on the woman's face, Lena added.
"Her family disowned her; they want nothing to do with her…even now." Lena brought Angela's hand to her lips and kissed it softly.
Poland
February 14, 2010
Lena didn't know how much time had passed since her and Angela's friends had left. She watched two burly men fill the grave with dirt, and now even they were gone.
Taking a deep breath, she finally spoke. "Mój anioł (My Angel), what am I going to without you?" Tears streamed down her cheeks as she continued to speak.
"You are right here next to Mama; just as you wanted. I know you and Mama are having a wonderful reunion." She dropped to her knees and wept.
"What am I going to do now, my angel? How can I…" Her tears were uncontrollable as she buried her face in her hands.
A short time later, Lena felt a hand on her shoulder. Startled, she looked up through her tears, "B….Bianca?"
"Lena, I'm so sorry." Bianca knelt down beside her. "I'm so very sorry." She put her arm around Lena's shoulder and squeezed.
"What…how?" Lena's mind raced trying to figure out how Bianca was here and now. Why?
Bianca released Lena from the hug. "I think this might explain things." She pulled an envelope from her coat and handed it to her former girlfriend.
Lena ran her fingertips across the handwriting recognizing it as Angela's. Lena started to open it, but Bianca stopped her by placing her hands on Lena's. "Let me give you some privacy. Then we can talk."
Lena nodded. After standing, Bianca squeezed Lena's shoulder and walked away.
She stared at the envelope for a few minutes, before carefully opened it. After removing the folded paper inside, she wiped her eyes again, and then unfolded the paper.
My Dearest Lena,
I don't know exactly how I exited this world, so I wanted to make sure that I told you that I love you. I honestly don't know if I ever really told you how much I loved you or how much our life together meant to me. You, Moja miłość (My love), saw me when no one else would even give me the time of day, not even my family. There were days, most everyday really, where I thought I might explode with all the love I had for you. You gave me a life that I had only dreamed about. I got to be the housewife (and on occasion 'Naughty Housewife' you seemed to like so well) I'd always wanted to be. You were Mój świat, Moje życie(my world, my life). Thank you, thank you for giving me that life.
Since you are reading this, I'm sure you are trying to figure out how Bianca knew to come here. This is where I get to tell you about my final wish. I know Bianca hurt you, but I know, deep down in my soul, that you belong with her. Please give her a chance. I know she's willing to try because, again, you are reading this. Moja piękna (my beautiful) Lena, I want you to be truly happy.
Kocham Cię zawsze(I love you always),
Twój Anioł (Your Angel)
She read the letter twice. Then carefully, folded it and slid it back into the envelope. Rising from her knees, she looked down at Angela's freshly covered grave as the hand with the letter came to rest on her heart. "My angel, I'm not sure I can do what you asked. Kocham cię, mój anioł."
Lena stood there for several minutes as the tears continued to run down her cheeks and Angela's words raced through her mind. Eventually, she wiped the tears, took a deep breath and turned around looking for Bianca.
Bianca was waiting patiently near a large tree. As Lena approached, Bianca smiled sadly. She hated seeing Lena in so much pain. Reaching out to take Lena's hand she said, "Let me buy you dinner and you can tell me all about Angela."
"I would like that." Lena said as she took Bianca's hand and followed her to the waiting car.