"We ever gonna talk about Carlos?"

The Boss raised an eyebrow at Johnny as they sped down the highway, turning down the music so she could hear him better. "What?"

"Carlos." He spoke bluntly his elbow resting out the window. "That's why we're going back to Stillwater, right? To visit his grave?"

Her eyes didn't leave the road. "I told you, we've got business."

"Yeah, yeah, yeah," he scoffed. "I'm not an idiot, Boss, you're overdue a visit."

She laughed, giving a nervous smile. "Fuck are you talking about?"

"You used to visit it every coupla' months."

"How the fuck do you know that?"

"You think I never followed you?" He asked. "Actually, at first I thought you were fucking someone. Got a bit curious, couldn't figure out why it was such a big secret."

"Right." She turned silent suddenly, her lips pursing together.

"You know," he gave a sigh and shifted in his seat, "we talked a lot about 'Eesh. Never talked about Carlos."

"We didn't need to." She replied.

"Sure we did," his voice took the reassuring tone that she so often needed to hear, the same one he'd use to talk her down from something. "You ever talked to anyone about it?"

"Nope." The Boss reached forward to turn up the radio again and end the conversation, but Johnny reached out and caught her wrist before she could.

"We're talking about it."

"No we're not."

"What the fuck kind of boyfriend am I if you won't even talk about your dead one with me?" He asked. "You spent fuckin' months with me, talking to me, pulling my sorry ass off the couch, making sure I ate, and I think it's about time you let me return the favor."

She glanced at him, giving an exhale. "It's not that I don't want to talk about it," she finally relented. "It's… weird."

"Why the fuck is it weird?"

"It just fuckin' is." She was frowning now, her knuckles whitening on the steering wheel. "I fucking miss him, and I still go and visit his fucking grave because I wish he was here to see what the Saints have become, but here I am visiting his grave with my new fuckin' boyfriend." She glanced at Johnny again, whose arms had crossed as he listened. "And I don't know why, but that feels fucked, Johnny. I'd fuckin' do anything to have him back, but I still went out and started fucking you? And now it's like, I feel the same way about you that I did about Carlos, and you aren't meant to feel that about two people. It almost feels like cheating." She gave a long exhale, gathering her composure again. "You ever feel that way?"

"About 'Eesh?" He asked.

"Yeah."

He took a good moment to think over this, his eyes glazing over, fixated on the road but not really watching. "Yeah. Yeah, I do. Think it helps that 'Eesh liked you, though. Don't get me wrong, if she was alive she'd cut my nuts off for looking at you the wrong way, but I think if she's watching us up there that she'd be happy we got each other."

"You think so?"

"Yeah." He gave a nod, watching her carefully. "And think about Carlos. Kid thought the fuckin' world of you. You think he woulda' wanted you to close up shop for the rest of your life?"

Finally, she cracked a small smile. "I think if he'd thought you'd be after me one day, he would have shit his pants a little."

"Oh come on," he laughed. "Give the kid some credit. He broke you out of prison, didn't he?"

"That he fuckin' did. And then I broke you out."

"And he fucked you and then you fucked me. Shit's full circle." Johnny laughed, smiling at the Boss as the car cruised onto the Stillwater freeway. "Seriously, Boss, he'd understand."

"And that feeling I get? The guilty one," she asked. "What about that?"

"Well, I don't fuckin' know if it's right," he mused, "but since when have we done the right thing, anyway? We're selfish, greedy, self-serving psychos - and that's why we're so good together."