Title: My heart is broken

Pairing: Regina Mills/Emma Swan

Spoiler: none; except it is an AU story…and it's SQ

Disclaimer: This is a fanfiction - I don't own "Once Upon A Time" or any of the characters.

"Once upon a time" and all its content belongs to Edward Kitsis, Adam Horowitz and ABC.

A/N: The idea for this story had popped up at some point and I could not get rid of it, so I thought I could as well write it down.

To be fair I have to say that this is going to be rather emotional and pretty sad story. At least in the beginning. And it might contain some triggers as well, but I will announce them specifically once they show up.

I have put a lot of thought into this, together with all my heart…because it's a little difficult with this story.

But the people, who know me…also know nothing with me is ever is, but rather difficult in fact. Because I like dark and twisty. And I'm big on emotions when it comes to writing. In real life I hide them quite well.

Oh, right...

I want to dedicate this story to my lovely and talented friend Ania (ania555), because she is such a great person and I am glad that I have gotten to know her. In fact I am quite honored.

xoxo

raven

My heart is broken

by Raven

Prolog

-Part I

A single tear made its way down her cheek.

A single tear for a ruined life.

A single tear for a broken heart.

Regina Mills stood there, frozen to the spot and watched Emma pack her belongings.

Two suitcases were already in the car and Emma was hectically putting her few other belongings into a small box.

Today was the day.

Today Emma would move out.

Today Emma would leave town.

And today she would leave her.

Regina was aware that it was her own fault, that she had crossed the line the other day.

She should have never made that decision.

It had been a horrible misjudgement , an unforgivable mistake.

And now it was too late, she could not undo it.

There was no way back.

Not for her, not for Emma – not for them.

She had ruined everything in a moment of weakness.

She had destroyed their lives, their future, because she had allowed for her past to cloud her vision once again.

Emma's eyes had spoken volumes when she had found out the unspeakable truth and Regina had been able to feel Emma's heart break as if she would have ripped it out of Emma's chest herself.

As if she would have ripped it out and crushed it – right in front of Emma's eyes.

And in some way that was exactly what she had done.

Regina would never forget the shock, the terror in Emma's once so beautiful warm eyes.

The eyes, that had always looked at her in the most caring and understanding way had turned into empty holes within a heartbeat.

Simply because her action had been the ultimate betrayal.

She had not only betrayed Emma's trust, but also her love.

"I'm done".

Emma's voice was cold and distant, but Regina was aware that she could not expect more, because Emma was hurt – hurt badly.

And the knowledge that she had caused all of that pain was unbearable.

Why had she done it?

What had she been thinking?

Regina knew the answer, which made it even worse, and it clearly did not change anything, nor could it make anything better.

Emma watched her closely, she could feel it and for a moment Regina thought that maybe, just maybe, Emma would change her mind.

It gave her hope that everything they had been through would weigh heavier than her mistake.

"I better get going. It's a long drive to New York after all."

Emma grabbed the box and headed for the door, not even bothering to say Good bye.

"Emma."

It was barely a whisper and yet it was enough to stop the blonde dead in her tracks.

"I love you", Regina confessed with shaking voice, because she knew it was the last time she would get to say it. Ever.

"If only that would be true…if only I could believe you."

And with that Emma walked out of the mansion, put the box into her car and drove off without looking back.

Regina on the other hand stood in the doorway and watched the yellow bug disappear in the distance while the tears began to stream down her face like a waterfall.

Her right hand rested on her stomach and in this moment Regina mourned not only the loss of Emma, but also the loss of the family she could have had, the family they could have been.

But now she had nothing.

No love.

No family.

No hope.

Because the last flicker of it had died the moment Emma had driven off.

And Regina was left with nothing, but loneliness.

With loneliness and darkness.

And her heart was broken.