Chapter Fourteen

Faith was killing time before she was going to go to train with Buffy and Giles and she couldn't focus. There was a video game on her TV and a controller in her hand but she hadn't touched it in quite a while. Instead, she was simply staring out into space and wondering what she was going to do.

There wasn't anything she wanted more in her life than Buffy. Every part of her seemed to crave the other slayer, so much so that it was getting hard to be in the same room with her without wanting to reach out and touch her. She wanted any sort of physical contact with her, even if that was just holding her hand. Anything would be acceptable.

What felt odd to her was that Buffy seemed to want to be around her as well. Even with the fact that Faith felt that the other slayer still partially believed that she was to blame for the spell, the urge seemed to be mutual. That was the only reason Faith could think of as to why Buffy stayed with her the last couple nights or why they had kissed.

It would still be so easy to leave town but with what Giles had told them it had been good that she didn't. If she had left that might have hurt Buffy more and that was the last thing she wanted. A part of her wanted to protect Buffy at all costs and she wondered when that had started. It was a feeling that she hadn't had when she first woke up but since she had seen Buffy suffer it was all she felt. She wanted to protect her from the pain caused by the Mayor.

"Just can't get it right, can you, Faith?" she mumbled to herself as she set her controller down.

She stood up and walked around her apartment in an attempt to think of the best solution to her problem. Faith wanted to be around Buffy all the time but outside of Giles, she figured there might be some resistance from everyone else in her life. The gang that surrounded Buffy didn't like her and Faith had to wonder if they ever really did. Of course, because of what happened during the spell that didn't seem to matter at all.

The group would never forgive her for what she had done in the past and she didn't know if she could live with that. Now she had to decide if keeping Buffy safe from the pain of the spell was worth her continuing to be an outcast in Sunnydale. There didn't seem to be an option that she could think that would allow her a happy life in Sunnydale.

Faith didn't think she deserved a happy life. She'd made so many mistakes while she was growing up in Boston and then again in Sunnydale. There probably was no going back from some of them and she knew if there was any justice she would be jail. She had killed two people. Even if the Mayor had erased the warrants and given her enough money so she never had to work again it didn't change the fact that she was a murderer.

She thought about what it might be like to leave Sunnydale and go someplace warm where she wouldn't have to care about anything. It wasn't the first time she had those thoughts and thinking about spending days on the beach doing nothing always brought a smile to her face. Thoughts like that were what got her through some rough times and her current situation was no exception. Faith thought that maybe she should just do it.

The best plan would be for her to leave and take Buffy with her but that would never happen. They were slayers and at least one of them would need to stay close to the hellmouth. While Faith couldn't find much loyalty for a town that had done nothing but chew her up and spit her out that wasn't the case with Buffy. Sunnydale was her home.

Maybe it was okay for her to stay and be miserable for Buffy. Part of her kept telling her that she needed to pay for her wrongs in some way and this would definitely be one way to do it. She could keep Buffy safe and maybe even explore her feelings for her all while dealing with everyone else's hatred and disapproval.

That might be the only real choice she had. As much as she sometimes wanted to, Faith couldn't leave Buffy. She wouldn't.

Her phone rang, causing her to jump. She walked to where it was on the couch and picked it up to answer it. "Hello?"

"Hi, Faith. It's Joyce."

"Oh . . . hi," Faith said awkwardly as she gripped the phone. "Uh, Buffy's not here."

"I know, dear," Joyce said and quietly laughed. She had hoped the call wouldn't be awkward but knew that was asking for too much. "I was calling to ask that you come to dinner tonight."

Faith was silent until she knew she had been quiet for too long. "Yeah . . . sure, I guess."

"Good, come over with Buffy when you're done with Mr. Giles. And don't worry, Faith. It'll just be the three of us."

"Okay," Faith said quietly. "I'll see you then. Thank you."

She hung up quickly and tossed the phone back on the couch, looking at it as she wondered what happened. Part of her thought maybe she was being set up for something but in the end didn't think Joyce Summers would do that to her.

Now she just had to figure out what Buffy thought about it.

Going for a jog with Faith was harder than Buffy thought it would be. It wasn't that she wasn't out of shape or anything but Faith seemed to never need to take a break. Every time Buffy would slow at all Faith would lightly taunt her into picking up the pace again.

"Faith, really . . . we need to stop."

Faith kept jogging for another couple seconds before stopping and turning back to Buffy. She smiled at how out of breath she looked. "We've barely gone a mile and a half, B. You've got to get in better shape."

"I'm not out of shape," Buffy breathed out. "I just need a couple minutes to catch my breath."

"Uh-huh," Faith said as she chuckled quietly. She walked over to Buffy and placed a hand on her back. "You definitely need to take a run with me every day until you're not out of breath. Can't have you like this when you're patrolling."

Buffy looked at her for a second then sighed. "Can we just walk back to Giles'? We can go farther tomorrow."

"Fine."

They started the walk back in silence with Faith trying to figure out how to bring up the fact she had been invited to dinner. It felt like Joyce wanted to have a talk with her face to face and it made her a little nervous. Simply imagining a dinner where it would be just her, Buffy and Joyce Summers made set her nerves on edge.

"You just tensed up, Faith," Buffy commented as they walked. "Is something going on?"

"Just thinking."

There was another silence and Buffy gently placed a hand on Faith's arm. "You know, this is the part where you tell me what you're thinking about."

Faith sighed, knowing she needed to tell Buffy. They were having dinner together later. "Your mom invited me to dinner tonight."

"Oh," Buffy said quietly, not knowing what else to say. Her mother hadn't mention anything to her about wanting to have Faith over for dinner. "That's news to me."

"Yeah, it seemed like something she just thought up."

Buffy looked over Faith and thought she might look a little uncomfortable, maybe even a little nervous. "It's just my mom, Faith. She's not going to start questioning you or anything."

Faith thought Buffy was very wrong with that statement and she knew she needed to say something about that. She thought that Joyce would want to talk about the fact Buffy had stayed with her. "I don't think so, B. I think she wants to get something out that requires her to talk to both of us."

"What do you mean?"

"Well, you have been staying with me."

"Oh."

"Yeah, oh."

There was another silence between them before Buffy spoke up again. "Is . . . is that something we should be talking about?"

Faith looked at Buffy and thought about the question. It definitely wasn't something she wanted to talk about but it was something Joyce would likely bring up. "I don't know. Maybe?"

It was a very noncommittal comment and Buffy wasn't sure how to take it. She knew that she was thinking the same thing as Faith though. Her mother would likely bring up the fact she had been staying with Faith. "Do you not want me to spend nights at your apartment?"

"I think you know the answer to that, B."

They only looked at each other before turning away and continued to walk back to Giles' condo in silence, each lost in their own thoughts. Both of them scared about where they were heading.

Faith stood in front of her closet, wrapped in a towel, and tried to look for something nice to wear. She knew that in the spell she can more conservative clothes that didn't show a huge amount of cleavage or wasn't skintight. Of course, none of those clothes were in her closet now and she was left with deciding what looked nice and not slutty. Appearances at dinner were important and for some reason, Faith wanted to make a good impression on Buffy and her mother tonight.

After a few minutes of nervous contemplation, she decided on a black, short-sleeved top that had less revealing than most of her wardrobe and dark blue jeans. She spent a little extra time on her hair and makeup, too. Doing anything that would make her look like a suitable girlfriend for Buffy.

As soon as she thought she could leave without getting there too early, Faith got in her car and drove to the Summers home. While she drove, she thought about what she was going to say to Joyce Summers and what kind of questions the woman might have for her. Joyce never sounded angry and Faith believed her when she said that she didn't blame her for the spell. She believed her when she said anything.

She stopped her car in front of the house a few minutes later and looked at it from her driver's seat. Faith remembered when she first was in the home, her first dinner with Buffy. Being around a parent made her nervous and she made up for it by eating anything in front of her. That hadn't gone over well with Buffy but then again, nothing had gone over well with the other slayer in the beginning.

"Faith?"

Faith looked up and saw Buffy standing on the other side of the car. "Oh, hey."

The look on Faith's face made her look adorable and Buffy smiled at the thought. It was getting easier to think those things about Faith and not get weirded out it. "Are you going to come inside? You've been staring at the house for a few minutes now."

"Sorry, I'm a little skittish today," Faith said as an excuse.

"You'll be fine," Buffy assured her. "Come on."

Part of Faith really wanted to stay in her car and maybe even drive away from this dinner but instead, she got out and followed Buffy up the driveway and to the front door. She was still lost in her own head and walked right into Buffy, who stopped when she reached for the door handle.

"Sorry, B."

Buffy smiled nervously before she leaned in and lightly kissed her lips, something she had wanted to do from the time Faith had pulled up to her house. "My mom made burgers and fries."

Faith only nodded and followed Buffy into the house, immediately smelling the food from the kitchen. She felt Buffy take her hand and lead her further into the house, looking around as she did. So much of it was the same as she remembered, with a few changes here and there.

"Mom, Faith is here," Buffy announced as they walked into the kitchen. She kept hold of Faith's hand because part of her thought she might run and she didn't know why. Her mom was on Faith's side. She had told her as much.

Joyce looked up from putting a heaping pile of fries on a plate. "Hi, Faith. I expected you to come over with Buffy earlier."

"Oh, well, I wanted to go back to the apartment and shower and stuff," she mumbled out.

"Well, you have good timing because dinner is ready." She smiled at the pair, noticing that they were holding hands. "Let's go into the dining room."

All three of them sat down and Joyce started to pass around food, making sure everyone's plates were full. Faith politely took everything that was offered to her but wasn't terribly hungry. She wanted Buffy's mother to begin asking her questions so she knew if the dinner would be an uncomfortable one.

"Buffy, honey, how is you head today?"

Buffy smiled, looking to Faith before she turned her head to her mother. "It's getting a lot better. When we were training at Giles' today there were times that I didn't even feel them."

"Does Mr. Giles know why you're getting better?"

Buffy wished she was sitting next to Faith instead of across from her before she felt even a hand on her knee would make her less nervous than what she looked right now. "He thinks it has something to do with the fact that Faith stayed in Sunnydale and that we're near each other a lot. All the other research he has, the people who were the targets for this spell didn't have that. They just went crazy alone."

Joyce nodded as she took a bite of her burger. She looked at Faith and easily noticed her nervousness. "What do you think, Faith?"

"Uh, I guess I agree with Giles," Faith mumbled out.

"Is that why Buffy has been staying with you the last two nights?" Joyce asked but there wasn't any malice in the question. She was only curious and she wanted to know more about the whys behind what was going on.

"Yes, Mom, I was staying with Faith because I feel better when I'm with her," Buffy answered. "When I started hanging out with her after everything, the headaches would lessen and that feeling would stick around after. If I keep being attached to Faith's side, maybe they'll go away entirely."

"Hmm-Mm," Joyce said, still looking at Faith. "What do you think, Faith? Is it okay that Buffy has been at your apartment so much?"

Faith didn't know how to answer that or if there was a correct answer. Her heart wanted to yell out that she wanted Buffy at her apartment all the time. That her feelings for her were stronger than ever and that it was the strongest she felt for anyone in her entire life. Saying all that might put both Summers women off and she didn't want that.

"Yeah, B can come over whenever she wants. I like having the company."

Joyce nodded. "Faith, can I be honest with you? When all this happened, I didn't know what to think. I knew that I had two sets of memories and one of them thought of you as a daughter. Someone who took care of my daughter and loved her. Then I looked at the memories that I knew were real and saw that most of us ignored you once you came to Sunnydale."

"It's okay, Mrs. S," Faith mumbled out.

"No, it's not." Joyce smiled at her daughter, her way of telling her that everything was all right, before continuing. "I was excited that you were here but it was selfish because I wanted Buffy to be able to quit. I thought you being here meant she could have a future but I didn't consider your future."

"Mom, it's okay now," Buffy put in. "I'm going to college and now Faith can help with slaying."

Letting out a breath, Joyce looked Faith in the eye and Faith tried hard not to look away. "Faith, do you want to date my daughter?"

"Yes," Faith said, keeping eye contact even though she was uncomfortable. "I want to date Buffy."

Buffy smiled. "I'm quickly realizing I have feelings for Faith, Mom. I want to be with her."

"That's what I thought." Joyce let out a breath and thought about what to say next. Both Buffy and Faith were adults but she wanted to at least offer some guidance to the pair. "Well, I know both of you are adults and in my second set of memories I was okay with you living together but . . ."

"Mom, you don't need to lecture us."

"I'm not going to lecture," Joyce said. "I just want both of you to take this new relationship slow."

Buffy looked at Faith and that the word 'relationship' had turned her completely pale. She would have liked to have had this conversation with Faith first before her mother had brought it up. "Mom, we haven't even talked about any of that so please stop talking."

"Okay," Joyce said, "but maybe you could stay here tonight after you come back from slaying."

Faith shook her head and found her voice. "Yeah, we can do that."

"Good." Joyce ate another fry and smiled. "Now we can move on to lighter topics. Faith, tell me why you wanted to buy a Corvette?"

Slaying had been fairly boring and they ended up walking back toward Buffy's house early. There had only been a handful of vampires and Faith wanted to get Buffy home since that's what her mother wanted.

"What do you say we drive back to your apartment and watch a movie?"

"B, I'm not going to go against your mother," Faith said. "She can be scary when she wants to be and I want to be on her good side."

"Trying to make a good impression, I get it." Buffy reached out and took hold of Faith's hand.

Faith looked down at her hand, noticing how Buffy gave it a little squeeze. "B, did you mean what you said to your mom? That you have feelings for me?"

"I . . . I do have feelings for you, Faith," Buffy said quietly. "I know we've said some things to each other and I'm still trying to figure everything out but I do have feelings for you. That's why I want to see where this goes."

"What if what you're feeling if still because of that spell?"

Buffy lifted an eyebrow, not sure what Faith was getting at. "What do you mean? I spell had me in love with you and that was broken. Whatever I'm feeling now has to be real and before you say it, it's not because being around you has made the headaches go away and memories don't overtake me anymore."

"But you don't know if it's a side effect or something?" Faith said. "I mean, Giles never found out if this scenario has ever happened so we're in uncharted territory here. We don't know if all this is real."

This felt like the start of an argument and it wasn't one that Buffy wanted to have. She looked ahead and saw her house. She picked up the pace, wanting to fully explain to Faith what she was feeling inside her house and not outside.

"B, you're going to have to answer me at some point," Faith said, sliding her hand away from Buffy. "I know how I feel about you but the spell didn't mess with my brain."

Buffy stayed silent until they reached the front porch and then she put her arms around her, kissing her soundly as she did. Faith knew that she was trying to distract from the conversation but she couldn't resist her. This was also the most intense kiss she'd had with Buffy since the spell.

They broke away from each other after a minute and Buffy opened the front door, guiding them inside. She noticed right away that her mother had gone to bed so they would have to discuss patrol or anything with her. Instead, she was able to take Faith by the hand and lead her up the stairs and to her bedroom. She desperately wanted privacy with the person she wanted to date, the one she knew she was in love with.

Faith stayed silent until they were in Buffy's bedroom and she had shut the door but then she knew she had to say something. She felt she had to tread lightly. "B, what are we doing?"

"My mom said to stay here tonight," Buffy explained. "That meant both of us."

"I can sleep on the couch or whatever," Faith offered even though her body was screaming that she needed to close the distance between her and Buffy and to do it now. "I don't want your mom to get pissed at me."

"Faith, I think I need to prove to you that this is nothing to do with the spell," Buffy said quietly. "If anything, it's helped me realize what I've been missing with you."

"B, I don't want you to confuse the Faith you remember as your girlfriend with you," Faith said. "We're different people. She was . . . better than me."

Buffy reached out and placed a hand against Faith's cheek. "That's not true and I'm not confusing you. Please, let me show you."

A/N: so lately I've gotten some requests to update this one and whenever I responded, I'd answer with a maybe and make no promises. I'm not sure what it was with the last request but it got me in front of my computer to reread this one and then write a chapter. I have no idea if anyone has been paying attention to this one but here it is. No promises on the time to the next chapter but I admit it felt good to go back to this one. Please let me know what you think. Until next time! Twitter: hayley128. :)