The Caretaker's Trick

It was a warm summer night in New Orleans. The air was full of spice and the sound of jazz music from a street performer's saxophone. Two brothers walked down Bourbon Street on their way to The Savoy theater. The eldest, Cain, was tall and thin and had pointy features including his hair, ears, and beard. He wore a brown suite with a black waistcoat and maroon bow tie. He also wore small, round, pince-nez glasses at the end of his long, pointy nose. The younger brother, Abel, was chubby and also had pointy hair and goatee, but unlike his brother, whose hair was brown, Abel's was jet black and better groomed. He wore a plain black suite and tie, with a crisp, white shirt and a red carnation in the lapel of his jacket. In one hand he carried a bouquet of white lilacs, moonflowers, and yellow acacias and in the other a black umbrella with a bamboo handle.

"Ah, I do so love N-N-New Orleans. Don't you, brother?" said Abel.

"Actually, yes, on that we are in agreement," said Cain. "It is one of the most mysterious cities on Earth. From Madame LaLaurie's chamber of horrors to the deep, dark swamps full of voodoo and monsters, New Orleans certainly does have an otherworldly appeal."

"The perfect p-p-place for a bit of m-m-magic," said Abel, pointing with his umbrella.

They had arrived at The Savoy and outside the theater was a large poster featuring a beautiful brunette woman on it. She wore a top hat and tails along with fishnet stockings and a bright yellow vest. Above her picture were the words: One Night Only! World Famous Magician, Zatanna Zatara, Live In Person! SOLD OUT.

"G-g-good thing we have reserved s-s-seats," said Abel.

"I can hardly contain my glee," said Cain, sarcastically.

"What do you have against Zat-t-t-tanna?" asked Abel.

"Not her in particular, I just find magic in general to be a bore. It's all about secrets and deception. There's really no mystery to it, it's just tricks," said Cain.

"But Zatanna's not like th-th-that. She knows real m-m-magic too," said Abel.

The brothers joined the crowd of people filing into the theater. When they reached the box office they gave their names to the ticket man who called an usher over to take them to their reserved seats.

"Even real magic is all about knowing the secret words to spells, or the secret ingredients to potions and such," Cain continued as they followed the usher down a hall.

He led them to the end of the hall and through a curtain to a private balcony with seats that had cards on them that said ABEL and CAIN. The brother's took their seats and the usher left them.

"But, this is your thing, so I suppose I should be a good brother and indulge you," said Cain. "If you want to come ogle some witch that you're carrying a torch for I'll accompany you. Just as long as I don't have to pay."

"I am not-" said Abel, but he was cut off when the theater lights suddenly went down and an announcement came over the loudspeaker.

"Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, The Savoy Theater is proud to present that most mystifying mistress of magic, the great Zatanna Zatara!"

"Pfff, mystifying," said Cain.

Abel gave him a dirty look.

There was a sudden clap of thunder and some small spotlights on the stage shone up to the ceiling where grey storm clouds began to form. There were flashes of lightning and more thunder. The audience below began to ooh and awe at the realistic storm brewing over their heads. Abel was on the edge of his seat. Cain was not. Suddenly a lightning bolt shot out of the clouds and hit the center of the stage. In a flash there stood Zatanna. The audience cheered as she took several bows.

"Good evening, my friends, I am Zatanna," she said.

More applause.

She was even more beautiful in person than she was on her poster. At least to Abel, anyway. Her black hair shone under the stage lights like obsidian and the rest of her seemed to shine as well, lit from within by a supernatural glow.

"For my first trick tonight I thought I would do an oldie, but goodie. You've all seen the famous sawing-a-woman-in-half trick, I trust. Well, this is just that, except the woman I'll be sawing in half is myself."

The audience clapped.

As a blonde woman in overalls wheeled a coffin-like box onto the stage, Zatanna rolled up the sleeves of her tuxedo jacket. With a grand gesture from her gloved hands she shouted,

"Dnel em emos sdnah!"

Immediately her hands detached themselves from her body and floated in mid air.

"Would ya look at that," said Abel.

"Where else am I gonna look?" said Cain.

The lid on the box swung open with a loud and eerie creak and Zatanna, very gracefully considering she was unhanded, climbed inside. Meanwhile, one of her hands snapped it's fingers and a large hand saw appeared in it. From that point on it was a pretty standard trick. Zatanna was sawed into thirds and then put back together again by her blonde assistant. After the trick was over she shouted,

"Evig em net!"

And the hands returned to her wrists.

The audience loved it and they loved all the tricks she did after it including several card tricks, one of which she had showed to Abel in private once, and several illusions involving both real and stage magic.

Two hours later she thanked the audience and bid them adieu, then disappeared in a flock of white doves.

As the house lights went on and the rest of the audience got up to leave, Abel sat in his seat too lovestruck to move.

"Move it, tons-of-fun," yelled Cain, who was ready to get this evening over with.

"Let's go find her dressing room, so you can give her your cliché flowers and we can return to our houses."

Abel snapped out of his stupor and nodded. He grabbed the flowers and his umbrella and together with his brother found the nearest usher and asked them where to go. Several minutes later they stood outside a door backstage that had a pentagram on it and "Zatanna" written in sparkly letters. Abel was too nervous to knock, so Cain banged on the door for him.

The door opened and Zatanna stood there in dark jeans and a fitted, white, button down shirt. It almost matched what Abel was wearing in classic simplicity. Her hair was pulled back in a ponytail.

"Abel, I'm so glad you came!," she said and hugged him.

Then she nodded hello to Cain.

"Cain," she said.

"Madame," he nodded back.

"These are for you," said Abel, handing her the bouquet.

"They're beautiful," said Zatanna. "Esav fo retaw."

A vase full of water appeared in mid air and she placed the flowers in it and then sent them floating over to a nearby table. Then she turned to Abel.

"Hey, listen, there's a few more things I have to do here before I can leave, but how would you like to meet me for coffee?" she said.

"I-I-I-I-," said Abel.

"There's a little place just around the corner. I go there whenever I'm in town. It's called Café Insomnia. It's open all night. I'll meet you two there in about half an hour and we can catch up, kay?"

"I-I-I-," said Abel.

"We'll be there with bells on," said Cain, grabbing his stammering brother by the arm and pulling him away.

True to her word, Zatanna walked into Café Insomnia thirty minutes later exactly and found Abel sitting at a table by himself.

"Where's your brother," she asked him.

"Oh, h-h-he got into a fight with the b-b-barista, because he th-th-thought the prices were t-t-too high for coffee. Then the m-m-manager came out and called Cain a h-h-hipster, whatever that is, and said h-h-he could take his Victorian eye glasses and g-g-go somewhere else, so h-h-he stormed out and went home," said Abel.

"Well, I'd much rather it just be you and me anyway," said Zatanna.

"Me t-t-too," said Abel.

A waiter came by as Zatanna sat down. She ordered an espresso with extra foam.

"So, how did you like the show?" she asked Abel.

"I th-th-thought it was just magical," he said.

She smiled at the dorky play on words, but was genuinely flattered, because she knew that he was sincere. He was always sincere.

"What part did you like best?" she asked.

"Umm, the p-p-part where you turned yourself into a mermaid and s-s-swam around inside that floating orb of water was f-f-fantastic," said Abel.

"Haha, oh, that old trick?" she said.

For the next hour and a half the two drank their coffee and laughed. They told each other stories and secrets and all about adventures they'd had and people they'd met, then it was one o' clock in the morning and Zatanna began to yawn.

"Oh, it's been great fun catching up with you, Abel," she said, "But I have to be in Gotham tomorrow by five, so I should really be getting back to my hotel room."

"Quite right, quite right," said Abel. "It is r-r-rather late. I must be going too."

Neither of them noticed a scruffy looking man in a ski cap and denim jacket enter the coffee shop and shuffle his way towards the counter.

"Is your h-h-hotel far from here? Would you like m-m-me to walk you?" Abel asked.

"Sure, I'd love the company. It's just two blocks from here," said Zatanna.

"Alright, nobody move!" yelled the scruffy man as he produced a gun from the pocket of his jacket.

He waved it around at the few customers in the shop and then pointed it at the cashier.

"Give me the money!" he yelled.

"Criminals never say anything original," Zatanna said to Abel. "I'll take care of this."

"Be careful," said Abel.

He reached out to her as she got up from the table.

"It's okay, I have super powers, remember?"

The gunman saw her coming out of the corner of his eye and turned the gun on her.

"Freeze, lady, hands where I can see 'em."

"Okay," said Zatanna, raising her hands, "But can I just say one thing?"

"What?"

"Nug nrut otni ekans."

Suddenly, instead of a gun, the man was holding an Egyptian asp. He screamed and dropped it. It hissed at him and lunged, causing him to jump back into a rack of coffee mugs which fell over along with him.

Zatanna was uttering a spell to get rid of the snake, when Abel noticed a second man entering the shop with a gun.

"Zatanna!" he yelled and ran towards her as the man took aim.

Zatanna turned around to see the gun pointing at her. There was no time for spells. The man fired. Abel leapt in front of Zatanna, which was no small feat given his weight. The bullet pierced his chest, tore through his rib cage and went straight into his heart. He fell at Zatanna's feet, quite dead.

For a minute everyone involved was too shocked to move or speak, but then Zatanna pointed at the gunman in front of her with one hand and the one on the ground next to her with the other, and said,

"Enib meht!"

Metal chains twisted and curled around both criminals, binding their arms and legs and even covering their mouths so all they could utter were muffled screams. Zatanna knelt at Abel's side and cradled him in her arms. There was blood all over his white shirt and spattered on his face. His eyes were closed and when Zatanna pressed her middle and index fingers to his carotid artery she felt no pulse.

"You fool. You damn fool," she said as tears began to fill her eyes. "I have a protection spell on me. A bullet wouldn't have done anything."

She lay her head on his and the blood on his cheek got on hers. Outside, real thunder roared in the sky and heavy rain began to fall. The cashier dialed 911. Over the sound of the storm, though, and the cashier's panicked voice, Zatanna could suddenly hear the faint sound of breath being inhaled. She drew back and looked at Abel's face. His eyes fluttered open.

"I did not know that," he said.

Zatanna laughed and hugged him. She had known about Abel's special ability to die and then not be dead anymore, but in the heat of the moment she had forgotten, and this was also her first time seeing it happen in person.

"I w-w-wonder if you might help me to my feet, my dear," said Abel. "I don't want to s-s-slip on my own blood."

Zatanna helped her friend up. Abel looked down at his stained shirt.

"Now look at th-th-that. My nicest sh-sh-shirt. Did you take care of those r-r-rapscallions?"

Zatanna gestured to the defeated thugs.

"Well d-d-done!" said Abel.

The police arrived shortly and Zatanna told them the whole story. Minus the resurrection, though, since she thought it would just cause too many questions. She also put a simple memory charm on the coffee shop patrons and the gunmen so they'd remember things just a little differently, and conjured up some fresh clothes for Abel. Because she was a known superhero, the police pretty much took her word at face value and let her and Abel leave after answering only a few questions. By the time the two stepped out of Café Insomnia it was well after two in the morning and the rain had settled down to only a light drizzle. Zatanna and Abel stood under the overhang in front of the shop.

"That was a very noble thing you did, Abel. It was stupid, but noble," said Zatanna.

"Oh, well, I thought you were in d-d-danger. I figured if someone had to be shot it should be me and not you. I die all the t-t-time anyway. It was nothing," said Abel, sheepishly.

"To die is nothing. Everyone does it eventually," said Zatanna, "But to die for someone else, that is something very special."

Abel smiled.

"Do you still want m-m-me to walk you to your hotel?" he asked.

"Of course," said Zatanna, grabbing his umbrella and opening it over both of them. "We can protect each other."

And with that, they both stepped out from under the overhang and into the dark, stormy night bound for Zatanna's hotel room. What happened when they got there, however, will forever remain a secret.

The End