Author's note: Yes, yes I has been a little over a year since I last updated and I am deeply sorry for that. Real life has been getting in the way since then and I've been having to take care of more pressing issues than this story that I started on a whim. That being said, I never intended to finish this piece of work nor did I imagine so many of you would like it. Thank you all so much for supporting me and being patient with me. Hopefully, I'll be able to update every month or so now with life somewhat sorting itself out. I apologize if this chapter isn't the best but I really have been lacking ideas and motivation. If you're curious as to what has been happening to me personally, I don't mind telling you just PM me. I hope you all enjoy.
Kevin looked at the older male in concern, gently placing his hand on his shoulder.
"Eddward...?"
Edd flinched away from him slightly, just barely looking at him.
"I'm fine. Don't worry about it."
The ginger drew his hand back slowly, sighing and looking away from him.
"I wish you would open up to me...but I won't force you if you aren't ready to."
The older male looked at the younger, seeing his dogtags that he had given him in the hospital the previous night.
"You...didn't take them off...?"
Kevin looked at the metal around his neck, clutching them and smiling, a faint flush across his freckled cheeks.
"I-I guess I didn't...I feel like they bring me comfort considering they're yours..."
The raven looked at him, tilting his head slightly.
"My presence comforts you?"
"More than it should..."
The ginger admitted, smiling more and leaning his head on Edd's shoulder cautiously.
"You wouldn't mind if I stayed the night, right?"
"You can if you'd like, I suppose."
Edd pet his hair gently, treating each strand like it was the fragile hair of an angel. To Edd, it was. Kevin was his angel. But that meant Edd was Kevin's devil.
Edd drew his hand away from Kevin's hair, looking away from him. Kevin always wondered what he was thinking, wondering if he was over thinking every little detail. Which he usually was.
"Are you alright?"
Edd looked at him slightly, pulling him into a tight hug.
"You have no idea what you're doing..."
"What do you mean..?"
"You're such a good kid...Innocent, pure. Everything I'm not. Being around me will make you adapt to my personality and change you for the worst, pumpkin. I don't want you to become someone as low as me..."
The ginger pulled away slightly, looking into ice eyes the seemed to have a different feel to them. Something was different, it was something that Kevin had never seen in the raven's eyes before. Fear.
"Eddward...why do you seem so afraid..?"
"I can't let myself change you...I refuse to let you become like me... I'm terrified of making you someone who's completely dead inside.."
Just then, Edd lost it. Tears filled his eyes and he let them fall, unable to stop them even if he tried. His stoic, emotionless wall was crumbling down and he hated the it fell in front of Kevin. It made him feel weak.
Kevin looked at him in worry, lifting his head slightly.
"Edd...? Please don't cry..."
the older male clung to him, burying his face in his chest.
"I'm sorry...I'm so sorry..."
He said softly, shaking slightly. He was having a complete breakdown for the first time in years. Kevin pet his soft, black hair to comfort him the best he could.
"Shh...Don't cry...don't apologize..."
The ginger lifted his head more, wiping his tears away.
"Eddward, please clam down...You're worrying me...please don't cry...please don't apologize...you didn't do anything wrong..."
Edd was trying to force himself to calm down, which only made it worse. He shook harder and his breathing was rushed and uneven, like he was seconds away from hyperventilating. Kevin felt his pulse racing and he didn't know what to do so he held him as still as he could, kissing him and putting all the emotions he possessed into it.
Edd calmed down almost instantly at feeling Kevin's lips, kissing back slightly. The ginger pulled away, blushing slightly and meeting his eyes.
"A-Are you better now...?"
The raven met his emerald eyes and hugged him. His breathing and heartbeat were still uneven but he was calming down more.
"I'm fine now..."
Kevin breathed a shaky sigh of relief, blushing as he looked at him.
"S-Sorry I kissed you...I didn't know any other way to calm you down...words weren't working."
"You have no reason to apologize, pumpkin. I enjoyed kissing you. Plus it calmed me down...That's what matters right..?"
Kevin nodded, looking away still. He possessed a feeling of despondency from kissing Edd. Sure, Edd kissed back, but Kevin felt like the other had the same feelings.
Kevin loved Edd. He wasn't going to deny or disprove those feelings because he knew it would be pointless, he would just be lying to himself. The main issue was that the ginger had no idea how the older male felt about him considering he was sending mixed signals. Eddward Vincent was by far the most confusing human being Kevin had ever encountered in his entire life. He wasn't sure if Edd loved him, lusted ouver him, felt pity for him or truly hated him and was just using him. The mere thought of Edd hating Kevin broke the boy's heart to pieces. Edd had noticed that Kevin had been silent a while and he was curious as to why.
"Pumpkin?"
Kevin snapped back into reality, looking at Edd and smiling slightly.
"I'm fine! Really, just thinking."
"About?"
"Nothing, really I'm fine."
Edd raised a brow at the boy and shrugged, standing.
"If you say so. Come on, it's getting kinda late."
The raven walked to his bedroom, the ginger following close behind. He turned on the light, leading Kevin inside and closing the door. Kevin turned around and looked up at him, smiling slightly. Edd looked at the smiling ginger, the sight making him smile slightly.
"What?"
"Nothing, I just really like this side of you. You really are a nice guy, Eddward."
Kevin cautiously wrapped his arms around him, resting his head on Edd's chest. The raven gave a small smile, running his fingers through his ginger hair and sitting on the bed with Kevin in his lap. Kevin blushed hard, sheepishly looking into his eyes.
"I...really like this...Being close to you like this..."
The raven held the ginger closer and carefully, afraid of hurting him.
"I like it too..."
He said, tracing his spine with a finger and making Kevin shiver and blush.
"You wouldn't mind if I kissed you again, would you..?"
"Not right now, okay? I'm still having having issues breathing from earlier."
"Oh...Okay..."
The upset Kevin more than it should have, making him feel like Edd didn't return his feelings. Though he was just paranoid. He understood that Edd still wasn't feeling well but the rejection hurt him badly.
"Um...Edd...?"
"Hm...?"
"We...W-We need to talk..."