I hope you aren't as sensitive any more.

You're honestly the most loving and precious boy I have ever met or will have the pleasure or meeting; as delicate as a little flower petal, so vulnerable and so in need of protection against those who are going to hurt you. Say, like me.

I hope you can sleep better now.

You never seemed able to sleep, no matter what time in the morning it was.

You'd kiss me goodnight and head to bed hours before I finally followed suit, yet when I finally tip-toed into our room, you were still awake, if just partially.

I remember the late-night sleepy Phil that used to have conversations with me in whispered voices about things that didn't make any sense. You'd ask me to snuggle with you while you chatted away, but even then you would never fully fall asleep, even if I did.

I hope you can sleep a lot better without me.

I hope you never give up on your dreams.

When you were little your dreams were fairly childish, I'll admit. I mean a weatherman, really Phil? But as you got older and progressed through life, by the time you grew up and learned what was possible and what was not, by the time I met you in other words, you had realistic goals, Phil. Dreams you could achieve with your eyes closed. You just need to believe in yourself more.

I hope you keep your friends close.

I know you, buddy. I know the second you find this you're gonna freak out, have an anxiety attack or something; well, if you care about me you will. I know all too well about your survival methods and I will not be at all pleased with you if you hide in your room with those blades, okay? I found them and took them a long time ago anyway. Keep Chris and PJ close; they care about you and will take care of you. They love you, possibly even as much as I do.

I hope you beat the last level of Crash Bandicoot.

You were almost there the other night as I sat watching you shake your hair out of your face in agitation. I sarcastically suggested we take a walk down to Boots and buy you a packet of cirby grips, to which you rolled your eyes; that's probably what made you loose that last time.

"Giving uuuuup?" that stupid voice had said as you glared at the screen, then at me before hug-tackling me, pinning me down and starting to tickle me. But I knew you loved me, since it was all followed by a sweet kiss. It always is. Sorry, always was.

I hope you continue doing YouTube.

Do what you love most Phil and stay true to your heart. Me? I don't know what I'll do. I don't think I could ever bring myself to make another video after everything, but you don't have that guilt to carry like I do. Do what makes you happy.

I hope you do well with the radio show.

I resigned from the BBC a few days ago, though I made them promise not to breathe a word anywhere you might find out. That was when it really hit me; I'm going. But I know you could do the radio show with anyone. It's not who you do it with, it's how you do it. And you do it fantastically, let me tell you. You're the lead guy, I'm just your assistant. My boots won't be big to fill at all; my replacement's toes will be coming out the fronts within a matter of days.

I hope you ask Carrie out.

Even though you were with me and you said our love was something special and something genuine, I always knew you had a thing for Carrie. You'd always liked her and I'd never really seemed to mind. I caught you kissing her once and I said nothing. Why? Because I knew you'd have been having more fun with her in that second that you would've been if it was my mouth your tongue was roaming around in.

I hope you enjoy having the cereal all to yourself.

No one to hide and eat the cereal, so it's all yours I guess. Go wild, maybe even design your own cereal and make me even prouder than I already am.

I hope you tell your mum I meant well.

I'm not saying you must tell her I meant well, because really I won't be around long enough to see the damage or whatever is behind me. I'm moving forward and leaving you to do the same. I love your mum almost as much as I love mine, so I hope you give her my best.

I hope you can live without me.

Cats always land on their feet.

So...that happened.