A/N: This story was inspired by a cheesy-looking novel my mom left out on the counter. Hopefully, this fic isn't quite as cheesy.
Disclaimer: I do not own Once Upon a Time, or Heather Graham's book, A Pirate's Pleasure.
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A knock at her door caused Emma to groan impatiently as she fumbled around, trying to get ready for the day. The knock had a sharp sound to it, not the hollow sound that a fist makes, but a knock made by something solid. Assuming who the knocker was, Emma rolled her eyes and stomped towards the door.
"WHAT?" she practically growled as she yanked it open.
A leather clad pirate stood before her with his hook raised in midair, prepared to knock. With a smirk on his face, he gave her a slow once-over, and then quirked an appreciative eyebrow.
"Did you dress for the occasion, Swan? Or, do you always answer your door so scantily clad?"
With narrowed eyes, Emma quickly wrapped her robe tighter around her body.
"Hook, I don't have time for this! I'm—"
"On your way to work. I know, love," he said with a soft smile, "I've come to escort you."
Emma gave him a bored look.
"My car escorts me to work."
"Cars," he scoffed at the word, "A most useful invention. Do you know what else is useful, darling?"
Emma sighed her annoyance, "What?"
With a pleased smile, Hook leaned towards her until his imposing presence sent her back a step.
"A pair of legs," he answered, huskily.
Emma swallowed and tightened her grip on the door, feeling the sudden urge to slam it in his face. Hook maintained his smile as he waited for her to accept his request. Emma gave a sigh.
"Fine," she said, "Give me 15 minutes and I'll let you walk me to work."
Emma moved to close the door then, but a black boot pushed its way inside.
"You would make me wait outdoors?" he questioned as a frown formed on his face, "After I've lent you the use of my ship and my services, you still don't trust me?"
Emma stared at him with a blank expression and then opened the door wide. Hook gave a dramatic bow of his thanks and strolled inside her home.
"Leave this room and you'll be leaving this apartment with NO hands," Emma threatened him.
Hook smiled, having grown used to her charmingly, empty threats.
"Whatever you say, love," he replied, "Though, please don't hesitate to call on me if you need help undressing."
Emma shook her head, having grown used to his suggestive comments. She walked into the bathroom then, and closed and locked to door behind herself. Hook gave an irritated sigh at the sound of the lock, but he was quickly distracted with exploring the one room Emma had limited him too. He glanced at photos, he tried-out the couch, and he avoided things like TVs and stereos or the other useful inventions from the World Without Magic.
An opened cardboard box that was sitting on the floor in the corner of the room garnered Hook's attention. He walked towards it and glanced down to find that it was filled with books. A smirk played at the corner of his mouth as he spotted a book which interested him. He gave a laugh at the imagery on the cover just as Emma emerged from the bathroom.
"Why, Swan," he began as he glanced up to see her, "I never pegged you for a reader of leisure. Tell me, love," he continued as he raised an eyebrow in amusement, "Did this book remind you of anyone?"
With a frown, Emma crossed the distance between them so she could see what he was talking about. The title of the book caught her attention first: A Pirate's Pleasure. Emma felt her cheeks redden as she tried hard to ignore Hook's insinuating smile. In classic, romance novel fashion, the book had an image of a half-naked man on its cover. He was a cliché pirate with an eye-patch and a Jolly Roger tattoo. The pirate had one hand on the waist of a busty woman, who he was leaning-in to kiss, while his other hand was on the hilt of his sword. Emma looked away from the book to meet an overly-amused pair of blue eyes.
"I can assure you, darling," Hook spoke with a grin, "A true pirate wouldn't be worried with gripping his sword." Hook took a step towards Emma and lowered his voice to a seductive whisper, "A true pirate would have all hands on deck."
Emma narrowed her eyes and then stared-up at him with her best "I'm not impressed" face.
"Sorry to disappoint you, but these aren't my books."
Hook fixed her with a look of disbelief.
"Oh, of course not," he taunted, "It's but a coincidence that a real pirate and a fictional pirate would both occupy a space in your home."
"The real pirate showed-up unannounced."
"Aye," he agreed, "But you invited him in."
The two stared at each other for moment. A smirk played at one's mouth, while the other kept a straight face.
"It's not my book," Emma said flatly as she eagerly walked passed him, headed for the kitchen.
Hook spun around to follow her, still holding the book in his hand.
"You're a bad liar, Swan. Just admit it, lass," he teased, "You have a thing for pirates."
With her back turned to him, Emma bit down anxiously on her lip and then grabbed her packed lunch from the refrigerator.
"Nope. Not mine," she repeated with a strong bluff, "Mary Margaret left those books here when she moved out."
Hook grinned.
"Ah! So your mother fancies pirates, does she? Well, you know what they say," Hook paused and his grin broadened, "Like mother, like daughter."
Emma groaned loudly and marched towards the front door.
"Out!" she said as she opened it, "Unlike some people, I have actual responsibilities."
"Aye," he agreed as he turned the book over and began reading the back, "But you have yet to learn to… 'surrender to the lawless thrill of a pirate's pleasure'."
Emma's arm shot-out like a whip and pulled the book from his grasp. Hook tried not to smile at the sheer fury he saw in her eyes.
"You. Out. NOW!" she commanded as she carelessly tossed the book over her shoulder.
"Whatever you say, love," he replied as he exited the apartment, "But if you ever want to give it a go, Swan—I can assure you we'd put your book to shame."
Emma slammed the door, loudly, behind her as she exited the apartment.
"It's not. My. Book," she repeated one last time, "Besides, why would I read some cheesy book about some cheesy pirate while I have the real thing, right here?"
With her packed lunch gripped tightly in her hand, Emma crossed her arms and stared expectantly up at Hook. He leaned towards her until his face was a few inches from hers, and then, he smiled that damnable, cocky smile.
"Perhaps, darling, you get lonely for me at night and the book is your only solace."
Emma's eyes smoldered as she glared into his blue ones, and then, with a spin on her heel, she stormed-off towards her car.
"I thought I was to escort you to work!" Hook complained from behind her as she slid into the driver's seat.
"You made me change my mind!" She yelled back as she cranked the engine and shifted into drive.
Emma drove-off angry then, leaving the pirate behind in her dust. She didn't know what pissed her off more—Hook just being his typical, infuriating self, or Hook calling her out on her bluff. Damn pirate! It was none of his business what she did in her spare time. So, maybe she had read the book, but it had only been once! Emma sighed and internally cursed the lack of distance there was in the small town. She wasn't oblivious to the fact that Hook would follow her to work.
He would show up at the station, all swagger and smutty smiles in his black, leather coat. He would taunt her about pirate romance novels, and suggest, in his suggestive ways, how to improve upon them. He would tempt her with his dashing grin and his smiling blue eyes. And maybe, just maybe, Hook would finally succeed in being seductive. Emma's walls would come tumbling down, and at last, she would give-in to a pirate's pleasure. Either that, or Emma Swan would give Captain Hook the biggest black eye of his life. Whichever way it went, it would only lead them one step closer to the inevitable: the inevitable cheesy-romance-novel that their lives were slowly turning into.