So…I know that there's an image of this form filled out pretty much like this, in that it's from Coulson to Fury, floating around on the Internet but my sister and I decided to take our own spin with it. Mainly because we have the whole book that it's from, and also because we wanted to do our own thing with it. Hopefully, others like it as well.

Disclaimer: I do not own any of the forms you see in this story. They belong to the Formal Notices: From The Bureau of Communication by Joshua and David Keay. I also don't own The Avengers, who of course belong to Marvel. I think that's it.

Warning: Obviously, the original formatting of these forms won't hold up in Fanfiction dot Net court, so I've tried my best to make it understandable. Since the forms are fill-in-the-blank originally, any part that is underlined is something that was 'filled in' by the character or characters mentioned. Anything that is bolded and underlined is one of the options chosen by the person or persons filling out the form when applicable. Anything in (parenthesis) is instructions given by the form for options to choose when filling in the blank. I left these in because they are hilarious.

Because, after all, S.H.I.E.L.D. is still a bureaucratic organization.

OFFICIAL NOTICE
AIRING OF GRIEVANCE (Form G-7001)
Statement:

To: (Name of Recipient) Director Nick Fury of S.H.I.E.L.D. From: (Name of Sender) Agent Phil Coulson

I am sending you this message to alert you that I find your behavior of (Offensive Action) destroying my mint condition, painstakingly collected Captain America cards to be particularly (Sensation) reprehensible. I wish to draw this to your attention because you may not be aware of the effect that it is having on others. Specifically, I feel (Feeling) a quiet burning rage whenever you (Details of Offense) enter a room. As an alternative, I would suggest that instead you could (Preferable Activity) replace each and every card, an action that I would find to be (Number) one thousand times better. If you choose to persist in your (Offence Restated) disregard for people's treasured possessions I may have no choice but to (Dire Consequence) fill out Form V-22 (Declaration of Romantic Feelings) in your handwriting and present said form to Deputy Maria Hill. While this is another possible solution, it would be (Positive Modifier) preferable for both parties if we could avoid it.

Filing Date:

Gravity of Offense:
Negligible—Middling—Incalculable
X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X

Offence Frequency:
Incessant
Constant
Frequent
Occasional
Rare
Once
Not Yet Occurred

Sentiment:
Thank You
Sincerely
Most Seriously
It's Not Personal
Respectfully
With Love
Without Love

Parties Offended:
Myself
Others
Society
God

Please Respond:
Never
Immediately
At Your Leisure

Include Apology

Additional Notes: Yes, God and Society were offended as well. Some of those cards were one-of-a-kind. I still expect them to be replaced, or at the very, very least fixed.

Director Nick Fury read through the missive on his desk again, still not quite believing what he read. He thought for sure that those Forms had been burnt, or at least lost forever in deep storage. He had a feeling that he knew who it was that dredged those horrible things back up—and for once, it wasn't Tony Stark. Director Fury sighed, knowing that this wasn't going to stop anytime soon. If anything, it was going to get worse.

And, if he were being completely honest with himself, Director Fury had to admit that even he liked the Forms a little. Luckily being honest wasn't part of his job description.

He paged Agent Hill to his office, reading through Agent Coulson's note once more. She entered the room silently, standing a respectful distance away from his desk. Judging by the hint of a smile that she was working on suppressing, she found out about the Forms already.

"Sir?"

"Agent, I want you to track me down the Formal Apology Form." He had a feeling that he would need it.