And the darkness at least held the bliss of ignorance.

Days passed for Sora in swaths of fog. He was numb to everything. Occasionally he would do something, but it passed through him, meaningless and quickly forgotten. He was a ghost. Part of him had died and now he was a ghost of his former self. He didn't realize what his actions were, the voices he heard slipped in and out of sync and eventually fell apart and left him with only dust and apathy.

Apathy. That was a really good word for it. Sora never thought he'd ever experience a complete lack of care about anything but here he was.

What good was saving the worlds? What good was even trying for a bunch of irredeemable and worthless planes of existence? With all the hundreds slaughtered before, who could really say the value in the hundreds more that currently lived? If everything perished then either a clean slate would start like the legends said, or there would be nothing to even miss itself. It was cold, solid reasoning and Sora wondered why it took him so long to see it.

That is, until he suddenly broke out of his fog. Like a rubber band snapping into place everything hurtled him forward into clarity. He winced and closed his eyes at the sharp migraine to accompany. The drones of battle faded away in the background to confused or defeated yells. Sora was holding his Keyblade in his hands. It was pressing against something but now he slackened the push. Why was he wearing what felt like the Organization cloak? Where was Xehanort? Surely Xehanort didn't betray him that would never happen...

"Sora? Sora, are you really...?"

Sora's head snapped up, "K-Kairi?!"

Kairi lowered her Keyblade. Her eyes were filled with wonder and joy, "Sora!" She tackled him.

Sora blinked, then uncertainly held her back, "Kairi... What happened?"

Kairi backed up, holding his cheek and brushing hair out of his eyes. "Y-you don't remember?" she asked plaintively, "I'm not sure whether or not I should be thankful for that..."

"Remember what?" Sora asked her. Fear grew in his eyes, "Kairi, remember what?!"

Kairi backed off, biting her lip. She began fiddling with her hands, "Sora, you..." She whispered, "I-I'm sorry I don't want to say it-"

"That's fine. It's okay." It was Sora's turn to comfort her. He finally turned to observing his surroundings, and a lump caught in his throat. This was the Keyblade Graveyard, and it was littered with his comrades and enemies.

It finally sank into Sora what that fog was. Kairi didn't want to say it, he grew cold and careless, the pieces finally lined up. He held a hand to his mouth. He didn't even realize it, didn't even realize how his heart harbored Xehanort's in a more literal sense.

"So you do remember." Kairi said.

Sora shook his head, "Not really. It got so foggy..." He stopped. His blood became sub-zero. His feet shuffled forward, and he brushed past Kairi. It was a dazed trance where his mouth dropped open and tears sprang to his eyes locked on the nightmare across the battle field.

Xehanort- his Xehanort -crumpled at Riku's feet.

Sora began running. A scream escaped him. He didn't care about anyone he ran past, and his flight only stopped when his knees painfully skidded next to Xehanort. His hands shook wildly, jerking left and right, like invisible people were playing tug of war with them, but picked up the still body all the same. "No, no no no, please Kingdom Hearts no!" Sora whispered.

He looked up at Riku's emotionless expression and screeched, "WHAT DID YOU DO?!"

Riku swallowed. His lips trembled. Something was dying in his gaze. A soft, doubtful phrase escaped him: "What was best for everyone."

Sora huffed, speechless. "I-I..." Realizing how little time he had, Sora finally just snapped at Riku, "I'll deal with you later!" Sora turned his attention back to Xehanort, and he desperately shook his lover, "Please! Don't be dead, don't be dead!" Sora shook Xehanort harder, "Wake up! Just wake up, please!"

Sora laughed with relief when Xehanort's eyes cracked open, and he let out a confused sigh. Sora held Xehanort's cheek and guided the half lidded gold to him, "Xehanort, Xehanort it's me. It's Sora."

He smiled, just barely, "Sora... You... Came back."

"Did I?" Sora asked. He shook his head, "D-did I leave you?" He realized he must've said things in that fog. It was vague memory now but he recalled telling himself over and over that this love was fake. "I did...?" Sora could only whine.

Xehanort laughed at this, "So you... Never meant that. That was only... my own hold upon you."

Sora saw Xehanort's eyes closing and shook his head, "Don't you dare. Don't leave me!" Sora fumbled around in his foreign pockets, looking for an elixir, a potion, anything. He found one, uncorked it, and held it to Xehanort's lips. He only closed his lips and refused to drink it. Sora sighed, "Please, please please please, I am begging you just drink it."

"It's for the best." Xehanort simply replied. His hand reached for Sora, painfully slow, "For you." It fell back on his chest soon after with a laborious breath, as if just that was too much of a task.

Sora shook his head, "T-that's a lie..." He tried to get Xehanort to take the potion again, "That's not true I don't want you dead! I-I never wanted you dead after..." Xehanort continued shaking his head, closing his lips, and Sora yelled at him, "For someone so smart you're being awfully stupid!"

Xehanort once again chuckled, but it was clear it was painful, clear that bitter defeat replaced mirth. "I knew... you wouldn't see it this way..."

Sora finally broke down into sobbing, "Please just drink the damn thing. You don't have much time."

At the mention of time, Xehanort's hand once again raised. Sora saw the world slow down. There was a shimmer in the air in a small perimeter around them, and Sora's allies seemed to be drifting in like molasses. Xehanort grew more limp than before, and a sheen of sweat began making itself known.

He looked at Sora and smiled, "Is this time... enough to say goodbye?"

Sora didn't know what to say. He hiccuped. The potion lowered to the ground, as Sora finally just gave up if this was what Xehanort wanted. He slouched forward, his voice almost silenced by the tears caught in his throat, "I'm not ready to say goodbye." He pressed his forehead to Xehanort's, holding his face, "I need to apologize, I need people to see..."

"You said..." Sora hated hearing such careful words hitch and waver, such death lingering in his breath, "you wanted to... change me?" The question stabbed at Sora, followed by another, "Was your love... All a lie?" Sora watched Xehanort's gaze a moment. Pained in more ways than one, holding his breath as he suffered and prayed he heard the answer he wanted.

"I thought at first..." Sora conceded, "I thought at first I could convert you, drag you out of the darkness." He quickly covered what he had said, "But eventually, I grew to love you, and I... I-I wanted people to see the real you." Sora wept, "To see that you had a heart, to see you really did care, to not see us and scoff and think we weren't being truthful. I do love you. I really do. It's stupid, it doesn't make sense, and I have no idea how it happened, but I love you. I love you and your stupid face, and your stupid thoughts, and your stupid names for me, and your stupid, stupid selflessness." Every utterance of 'stupid' brought a new wave of sobs, a hitch, the smallest whine.

Xehanort sighed. Sora wondered if that was his last breath, and panic filled his veins. He didn't want his last words to Xehanort to be-

"I am... not... a selfless person."

Sora backed away, shaking his head, "Then what on earth would you call this?! What would you call everything you've done for me?!"

Sora saw that clever glint in Xehanort's smile, as weak as it was, "A... small change." Sora saw Xehanort lifting his hand again, and this time he quietly pressed it to his face. He blinked away a few more tears, which were gently rubbed away by that gentle gloved hand. Xehanort struggled to find his words, then said, "If anyone... in these worlds... is selfless... it is you, my love."

Sora smiled. He bitterly laughed. He closed his eyes, "Does that even fit if I..." His giggling remained woeful, and stopped him from continuing. It halted the words at his lips and just let the choked sound fall from them. When he opened his eyes again he mocked himself, "I almost don't care what happens. I don't know what I would do to get you back, but it the limits are small." He leaned in and gave Xehanort a gentle kiss, "I'm selfish. I'm so selfish."

Xehanort's hands held Sora, and for a moment the two tried to ignore the inevitable. When Xehanort fell back, he murmured, "My bad."

Sora had another laugh almost choke him. He grabbed his potion again and begged, "Please, you shouldn't make me laugh until you're all better. Just take the potion."

"And yet... You aren't just... shoving the contents down my mouth." Xehanort held an air of disappointment in his voice.

"Because even if you're dying you still have a choice." Sora said, "Please, prove it to me that you really love me and live."

Xehanort only settled into the crook of Sora's shoulder. It was his turn to start crying, "I do love you... but if I live, Sora-"

"Then we'll live happily ever after!" Sora cried, "We'll love each other like people are supposed to! We'll just shrug off what people think a-and what were supposed to do and-"

"Sora... We tried." Xehanort pointed out, "You felt... So much guilt... Because other people... Were fighting our war"

"I just... I just... I just want you here. With me." Sora couldn't say anything more, bawling uncontrollably now.

Xehanort let out another deep sigh. He could feel time slipping from him, the pause he had created to give Sora time to cope collapsing slowly. "We don't... have much time... Resolve what you can."

"Just drink the potion and I won't have to." Sora grumbled.

Xehanort shook his head, "I'd love to-"

Sora yelled at him, "Then do it!"

"-but it would cause... unhappiness... to more lives than one." Xehanort finished. Sora shook his head, but bit down on his lips as Xehanort continued, "You know... neither of us would be happy... Not with that."

Sora whined, but couldn't find a away to prove Xehanort wrong. They wouldn't be happy, would they? The situation would get complicated, and perhaps saving Xehanort would bring that horrible puppet-master back to the surface of Sora's heart. Sora rocked back and forth. He had no words left. Everything to say had already been said.

"If you want my blessing..." Xehanort wheezed. Sora lifted his head. Xehanort nodded to a figured that had been peripheral until now, "Riku... He loves you... Very much." Sora raised his head higher and saw Riku still almost frozen in time, but his expression showed he was hurt by Sora's sorrow. His lips were barely parted, mid speech.

Sora sighed and lowered his gaze back to Xehanort, "I... If it'll give you some kind of comfort... As you move on."

"Just... Hold me to the end... And your... Beautiful smile... Be my last sight." Xehanort replied.

"I will." Sora said. He slowly turned his features into a smile, trying hard not to force it. "I will."

Xehanort smiled back. Only moments later, his eyes closed with a plaintive whisper, "You... Showed me..."

After the resulting silence of what must have been final words, Sora kissed Xehanort again, trying to get one last embrace. His brow knotted with grief as he felt Xehanort grow steadily cold, and he reluctantly backed away. He kept his forehead pressed to Xehanort's, trying to say 'no' and only getting a small and cracking wail. The voices of his friends reached his ears. Someone sat next to him.

Roxas cleared his throat, "Sora... Um..." He knew Sora heard him, but he let the topic drop, "... Never mind." Saying anything now would just seem cruel. Maybe. Roxas figured he'd at least give Sora time to let the death sink in. An opportunity he didn't have.

Riku finally just buckled. Until now, Sora and Xehanort had been like a video fast forwarding. Silent, rapid movement that you only got the gist from. Hearing Sora's sobs and seeing the way he cradled his first love in his arms in real time made Riku feel like some unlikely survivor of the organization had come and stabbed him in the back. He reached for Sora, but drew his hand back.

It took a painful swallow to say, "Sora, I-I'm sorry... He-"

"I know..." Sora moaned, "I know, it was probably his stupid idea..." He hiccuped. Roxas kept a straight face, but it was clear he didn't know what to say.

The ex Nobody finally hesitantly held Sora's shoulder, "If you want we can, uh, give him some proper rest...?"

...

It was, what, a year later now? Sora had been going pretty steady with Riku for about half of that time now. He sat on the packed sand, leaning against the paopu tree he normally sat on like it was the back of his chair as he watched the Destiny Island sunset for what would be far from the first and the last time.

He knew Xehanort remained about six feet under him, given his proper respects. Sora closed his eyes and smiled; his friends were so kind and respectful to just let him mourn the young man he grew to love.

"Still dunno what I showed you..." He whispered to the sunset, "Because I don't think someone who was so talented and smart like you were would be hated."

Sora closed his eyes as a breeze caressed his face. Sea salt was always a calming scent for him. Coming to this spot had happy memories, but it also held bittersweet ones that made his heart ache. But Sora smiled. Xehanort loved his smile and Sora supposed he would have done anything to keep the corners of his mouth tweaked in mirth.

"Well, people didn't like you much as you grew older, I guess. And maybe there was just so much pressure...?" Sora mused aloud. "Was treating you like a human being, treating you with genuine feelings... Was that really something foreign to you?"

He sighed.

"You were right. Riku's a good companion. We've been going out for awhile now, and I think it's safe to say many more years to come."

As always there was no reply.

"It feels weird to say this, since for so short you were my boyfriend and for so long you were my enemy number one, but... I miss you." Sora patted the sand, "I really do. Riku's nice, but you're still lingering around in my heart. The shadow to my light."

He didn't want to see the sunset anymore and turned his gaze to the star shaped fruits above. He closed his eyes, "I'll get over it at some point. I'm probably about half way to letting you go, really."

Sora realized what he had said and corrected himself, "I don't mean forgetting you, and I don't mean any insult to the romance we had, but I gotta move on at some point, you know?" Sora's voice cracked just barely, "I can't spend every day crying over you. Life's too short for that. It hurts, and at some point the wounds have gotta heal and fade."

Sora took a moment to listen to the wind and the seagulls and the waves and even the wood creaking and the sand shifting and the trees rustling. He breathed in the sea salt and the paopu fruit and the tropical flora. He felt chill settling in as the sun faded and shadows crept in.

"You showed me... people aren't really just good or bad." Sora said, "They're more complex than that. They get forced into doing evil, they don't just do it."

Sora finally stood, "I gotta go, Riku and I are having a date and all. He matters more since he's not..." Sora chuckled sadly, "Oh that big head of yours already knows."

He trailed off uncertainly. He knelt down and drew little pictures in the sand, "Thank you. For a lot of things." He kissed his hand and blew it onto the grave, "There is a way to be good again, and I'll make sure people remember that when thinking about you."

And with that Sora left with a wistful bounce in his step.

And with that we are also done! Done? Done. Feels coaster maybe? Hilarious to read because who the frick ships this?! (Seriously if you ship this so help me we need to keep the signal going)

if I converted you welcome to that convoluted place known as crack ships I will be your questionably sane guide as I go write more fluff because what started as a joke has evolved into possibly the hardest ship I have :/