Not really anything to say here! Just another fic that started as a joke and then got way longer than I anticipated. That kind of sums up like 90% of my fanfiction. Anyway, there's kind of implied Ristelle in here but nothing explicit.
Risky Business
Estelle wasn't really sure how to play Risk, but she'd found it sitting in her closet and that was reason enough to try it. She convinced Rita to join easily enough. All she had to do was hold the box up with wide eyes and a pleading pout and Rita tossed her notebook aside with an irritated sigh and "Ugh, another board game? Didn't you say you weren't going to play any more with me after Mousetrap?"
Estelle's pout turned into a frown. "Rita, you broke the game."
"The game was already broken! I fixed it. The whole trap mechanism was completely flawed. The more pieces you put in a device, the more likely it is to fail. Getting the stupid boot to kick properly should be proof enough of that."
"But redesigning a more streamlined mousetrap and then testing it on live mice isn't really part of the game..."
"Do you want me to play this one with you or not?"
Estelle sighed. "Yes."
Flynn had been even easier to convince. Once she explained that it seemed to be a tactical war simulation, his eyes lit up and he rambled something about it possibly being an interesting training exercise. Of course, once she had Flynn, all she had to do was tell Yuri that Flynn was playing and that it was a competition, and he was in. With four players secured, she spread the board out on the kitchen table one evening and they prepared to play.
"So, how do we play?" Yuri asked.
"Um..." Estelle consulted the rule book. "Ok, we each get thirty of these cute little soldier guys, and then we roll a die to determine who gets to place theirs first. You roll first Rita."
While Estelle counted out the little metal soldiers, Rita rolled a four. She handed it to Flynn who rolled a five. Estelle paused in her sorting just long enough to roll a four, too.
"Oh, look, Rita!" she said with a smile. "We match!"
Rita rolled her eyes. "Yeah, cool."
Yuri took the die and met Flynn's eyes while shaking it around in his palm. "What do you think, Flynn? I'm gonna roll a six and take the win."
Flynn shrugged. "It doesn't really matter. This is only determining who gets to go first, which is far from the deciding factor in a war."
Yuri rolled. It was a one. With a scowl he said, "Why am I not surprised?"
"Ok, Flynn!" Estelle said. "You get to go first."
"Hm..." He stared at the map in deep thought. After careful deliberation, he placed one of his soldiers on Nam Cobanda Isle.
Rita raised an eyebrow. "Seriously? All that thought and you're starting with that bizarre place?"
Flynn shrugged and gave a serene smile. "I believe it's your turn, Yuri."
"Right." Yuri stared at the map for about five seconds, and then plopped the soldier down in Northern Tolbyccia.
"Any reason for that?" Flynn asked.
"I like Dahngrest," Yuri said.
"I see," Flynn said. "Clearly you're entering this game of strategy with the right mindset."
"Hey, I don't need to put that much thought into beating you. It just comes naturally."
"Is that so?" Flynn said. "So will it just be 'natural' when I kick your ass?" He quickly glanced at Estelle and added, "Please forgive my language, Lady Estellise."
"It's ok," she said, having long since resigned herself to the fact that Flynn would treat her as casually as a normal friend the day Yuri voluntarily buttoned up his shirt.
"You don't know what you're talking about," Yuri said. "When I beat the commandant at a war game, you're going to look so stupid."
"Don't get so sure of yourself, Yuri," Flynn said. "You do remember that directing armies is my day job?"
"Hey!" Rita snapped as she plopped a soldier down in the Eastern Peyoccia Plains. "Why are you two so convinced this is down to the two of you? Estelle and I might win too, you know!"
"Of course," Flynn said quickly. "Forgive me, Estellise."
"I don't mind," she said, trying to decide where to put her soldier. After a minute of deliberation, she put him down in Southeast Weccea.
They went around in a circle, placing their soldiers one by one until every territory on the map was taken, and piled up the extras to build their armies. Flynn branched out from Nam Cobanda Isle and secured the rest the Yurzorea for himself. He split his troops equally between Southern Yurzorea and Estern Yurzorea, to create a blockade at the entry points from Desier and Tolbyccia, as well as what he called an outpost in Hypionia. Yuri split his forces up, building a large army in Tolbyccia and another in Desier, claiming Flynn was stupid for putting all his eggs in one basket. Rita branched out and took over every territory in Ilyccia, at the expense of her armies being more spaced out than Yuri in a Council meeting. Estelle wasn't really sure what to do and was so concerned with checking the rule book to make sure they were playing right that she ended up piling them all in Weccea.
"What now?" Yuri asked when all their soldiers were on the board.
Estelle consulted the booklet, flipping through the pages to find what to do once they actually got set up. "Now we go in a circle and declare war between the territories, rolling the dice to determine who wins. When you lose a die roll, you lose one soldier from that territory."
"Wait," Yuri said, "this is all based on luck? I'm screwed."
"Yuri," Flynn said, "would you be interested in, perhaps, an alliance?"
"Hm..." Yuri scratched his chin. "I think I could get behind that."
"What?!" Rita said, slamming her fist on the table. "You guys can't team up! That's cheating."
"Uh..." Estelle quickly consulted the rule book. "Well, it doesn't say you can't team up..."
"Fine," Rita snapped. "Estelle, you and I are teaming up, too."
"Ok, Rita. Flynn, you get to go first."
"Very well. Lets's see... I invade Southern Mayoccia Plains from Northeast Hypionia."
"You're on!" Rita said, grabbing the die.
It was perhaps the least violent invasion Flynn had ever commanded, but that was largely because it was decided by dice rolls rather than swords. In the end, Flynn won because Rita had only a single soldier in that territory against Flynn's outpost of about ten, and her luck ran out after two rolls.
"Dammit!" Rita said. "I was trying to control all of Ilyccia!"
"That was too ambitious," Flynn said. "It's too large, with too many territories. Your forces were spread too thin, making holding your position-"
"I didn't ask for your military help," Rita snapped.
Flynn pouted at her dismissive tone. "Very well. Then I shall continue my invasion of Ilyccia by attacking the Western Mayoccia Plains from my newly acquired Southern Mayoccia plains."
"I'll show you who's too ambitious!" Rita yelled. Estelle worried she might accidentally throw a fireball instead of the die. To her relief, all that come out of Rita's hand was the little white cube, which rolled a one. "Dammit!"
The game continued like that for a while. After only a few turns, Flynn proved to be the man to beat. His natural good luck, coupled with an intimate knowledge of military tactics, made him a powerhouse. While he invaded Ilyccia from the south, Yuri attacked Rita from the north and protected Flynn's vulnerable rear territories with his own armies. With a blockade protecting Flynn's stronghold in Yurzorea, he maintained control of the entire continent and received five extra soldiers every turn. Estelle had complete control of Weccea, but since it had much fewer territories she only got two extra soldiers each turn. She wasn't really sure what to do with them and she didn't want to get involved in Flynn's war against Rita, so she ended up piling them all in Weccea and spending most of the game consulting the rule book to settle disputes every time Rita and Yuri got into an argument over which of them was clearly cheating.
By the eighth turn, Rita had amassed her remaining troops in the handful of territories she still had in the Peyoccia plains. By now, Yuri was taking in five extra soldiers every turn for controlling all of Tolbyccia, while he and Flynn had Desier and Hypionia equally split between them.
"Ok, Yuri, it's your turn," Estelle said.
Rita glared at Yuri across the table, just daring him to try to finish her off. Yuri smiled at Rita, and then said, "I attack Northeast Hypionia from Eastern Hypionia."
Flynn's head shot around. "What?"
Flynn had about five troops in Northeast Hypionia, whereas Yuri had nearly twenty in the neighbouring eastern territory. "You heard me," Yuri said. "Roll the dice."
It broke Estelle's heart to see Flynn's face fall. He held the die in a motionless hand, staring at Yuri with wide eyes like a child who'd just been told his birthday was cancelled. "But... Yuri... we're allies. We had an agreement."
"Yeah, and now I'm calling that agreement off," Yuri said. "Roll 'em."
Estelle pouted. "How could you betray your best friend like that, Yuri!?"
"Yuri, I... I thought we were allies," Flynn said.
Yuri looked between Flynn and Estelle's faces. "What? Come on, guys, it's just a game."
"It's the principle of the thing," Flynn said seriously. "I can't believe you would stab me in the back like that."
"Flynn! It's just a stupid game," Yuri said. "I didn't know we were taking it so seriously. Rita's going to be out after your next turn-"
"Hey! You don't know that!"
"-and then what? You and I gonna gang up on Estelle?"
Flynn hesitated, glancing at Estelle nervously. "Well..." His expression steeled. "That doesn't change the fact that you broke the terms of our alliance. That is an unforgivable war crime."
"Yeah, except that this isn't really a war. Why do you have to take everything so seriously? Oh, don't give me that look! I'm still invading your dumb territory."
Yuri lost several rolls in a row, but he had considerably more troops than Flynn so eventually lucked out. "Yeah!" Yuri said. "Who's the military genius now, Flynn?"
"It certainly isn't the person who breaks the terms of engagement and stabs their allies in the back."
"Are you still going on about that?"
"It's serious, Yuri!"
"No, it isn't, because this is a stupid board game!"
"Shut up, both of you," Rita snapped. "I don't want to sit through your dumb argument. Are you going again Yuri?"
Yuri surveyed the board. "Nah, saving up my troops for now."
"Great," Rita said. "Then it's my turn now. Flynn, you're going down."
Flynn did not go down. Rita had about as much hope of defeating him as she did overpowering an elephant in hand-to-hand combat. She had a streak of lucky rolls and won three out of every five rounds, but even that wasn't enough to stand up to the might of Flynn's army.
"I'm sorry, Rita," Flynn said after the final roll. "You've run out of troops. I'm afraid you're out."
Rita snatched her last soldier off the board and smashed it into the pile with the rest of her fallen warriors. "Whatever! It was a dumb game in the first place."
"You're just saying that because we kicked your ass," Yuri said.
"I was going to let you three keep playing without setting the board on fire, but that option's not off the table, you know." Rita probably meant to use Fireball, but the glare she shot at Yuri might have been heated enough to do the job for her.
Estelle sighed. "Rita, what have I told you about using Fireball inside?"
Rita glanced guiltily at Estelle, then down at her fiddling thumbs. "...Sorry, Estelle."
"It's ok, Rita," she said with the happy smile she reserved for Rita. "I know you don't mean any harm."
Yuri was suddenly overcome with a scratchy throat, so he covered his mouth and coughed what sounded suspiciously like "not to your girlfriend at least", although only Flynn sat close enough to hear it. He didn't mention it, but he did cast a warning look in Yuri's direction.
"It's your turn now, Estellise," Flynn said, turning back to Estelle.
"Hm? Oh! Uh..." She stared at the board, chewing on her lip. So far she hadn't expanded beyond Weccea at all, but she probably should soon if only because there was very little board space for any more soldiers. "Rita, what do you think I should do?"
Rita sat back with her arms crossed and said, "Avenge me."
"Avenge you?" Estelle said with curiosity.
"Yeah!" Rita said. "Kick their asses for me, Estelle!"
Estelle's curiosity turned to enthusiasm. "Yeah!" she said, raising her fist. "Ok, Rita! I'll kick Yuri and Flynn's asses just for you!"
Perhaps it was because he was still reeling from hearing Estelle say 'ass', but Flynn did not do very well against her when she finally moved out of Weccea and attacked his territories in Ilyccia. It could also have been the fact that Estelle had an army of every single available soldier that she'd built up and up throughout the entire game, and she now steamrolled her way through Ilyccia like a plague of locusts.
"Yay! I got a five!" she said, beaming to herself as she wiped out the last of Flynn's soldiers in Ilyccia. She was perhaps the cutest and most cheerful world-conquering warlord on a path of mass destruction the world had ever seen.
"It's ok, Flynn," Yuri said. "You still have Yurzorea." He sounded like he was reassuring himself as well as Flynn, because he'd lost a few territories to Estelle's warmongering already and she showed no sign of slowing down.
"For now, maybe," Rita said with a grin. She leaning forward on the table with a mad gleam in her eye, watching Estelle crush Flynn and Yuri beneath her delicate high-heeled shoe like a proud mother.
Flynn's reign over Yurzorea did not last much longer, and neither did the game. Estelle's army moved west, conquering everything in her path, and then wrapped around south again to wipe out Flynn and Yuri's remaining territories in Desier and Hypionia. They put up a good fight. It would have gone down in history as a glorious last stand if it had taken place on an actual battlefield and not played with a couple of dice on a kitchen table. Flynn went down first, and, Flynn being Flynn, he accepted his defeat gracefully.
"Congratulations, Estellise," he said as he cleared the last of his soldiers off the board. "You played a very good game."
"Hey, it's not over yet!" Yuri said.
Flynn looked skeptical, likely because Yuri had two soldiers huddled in Southern Hypionia that were the world's final resistance against Estelle's hegemony.
"That's right, Yuri," Estelle said, honestly supportive. "Who knows, maybe you'll make a turn around!"
"Yeah, sure," Rita said, rolling her eyes. "And maybe he'll voluntarily clean his bedroom afterwards."
"Please, Rita," Flynn said, "Estellise's statistically impossible suggestion seems downright probable next to that idea."
"You're all going to eat your words," Yuri said, crossing his arms defiantly. "I've got one last trick up my sleeve."
"Alright, let's see it," Estelle said. "I declare war on Southern Hypionia from Western Hypionia."
Yuri reached forward, presumably for the dice, but then his hand went to the board instead. He grabbed one of his remaining soldiers and sent it crashing toward Estelle's with a cry of, "Hy-yah!"
Flynn stared at him with a look of confusion. "Yuri, what the hell are you-"
"There," Yuri said with satisfation when Estelle's soldier fell over. "My guy just punched yours out."
"That is not how you play," Rita said.
"Does the rule book say you can't?" Yuri challenged smugly.
"Uh..." Estelle reached for the booklet, but Flynn caught her hand.
"Estellise, don't bother looking. Even the writers of the rule book couldn't have foreseen someone doing something this stupid."
"Uh-oh," Yuri said, grabbing his soldier again. "While you were distracted - surprise attack!" He bashed the little figurine into a couple of Estelle's, knocking them over like dominoes.
"That's not fair!" Estelle said. "You can't surprise attack me!"
"Better pay attention, then," Yuri said.
Flynn said, "Doesn't it seem a little counter-intuitive to shout 'surprise attack' if you're trying to catch your enemy unaware?"
Estelle and Yuri ignored him, though. Estelle said, "Ok, then I use my magic and cast resurrection. All my guys are alive again!" She carefully set to work righting her fallen soldiers.
"If you get to use magic than so do I," Yuri said. He slammed his soldier into the board and shouted, "Guardian Field! There, that healed me, so I get to bring a few back."
He reached to his pile of discarded soldiers, but he was still setting them up when Estelle shouted, "Photon!" and knocked them down again.
"Oh yeah?" Yuri said. He took a deep breath like he was building himself up for an actual attack and then yelled, "Divine Wolf Fury!" and smashed his hand down on Ilyccia.
"You don't get to use Mystic Artes!" Estelle said. "You didn't even do the proper incantation."
"You're just jealous because I'm winning now," Yuri said.
"Well, I can use them too, then! Divine judgement for an evil soul... Sacred Penance!" She reached out and knocked over Yuri's remaining troops in Hypionia.
While this went on, Flynn and Rita sat back in confused amusement. They exchanged a silent look, both clearly saying, s/he's your friend.
"Azure!"
"Star Stroke!"
"Dragon Swarm!"
"Marche Waltz!"
Flynn cleared his throat, and Yuri and Estelle froze. Their heads turned in unison, their hands still hovering in the air above the board. "Perhaps," Flynn said, "we should bring this to a close before you accidentally set off real artes and break something.
Pink crept onto Estelle's cheeks and she slowly pulled her arm back. "Ehehehe... sorry, Flynn."
"There really isn't any point in continuing at this point," Flynn said, picking up a soldier that had flown onto his lap and setting it back on the table. "Yuri, just admit your defeat. You were as good as out."
"I never admit defeat until I'm dead," Yuri said stubbornly.
"Well, no," Rita said. "You can't say anything if you're dead. You're dead."
Yuri glared at her.
"It's ok, Yuri," Estelle said. She stuck out her hand with a smile, "Let's say it ended in a draw."
"Hm..." Yuri considered her hand, and then nodded and shook it. "Yeah. A joint victory." He pulled his hand back and looked to Flynn with a smirk. "See? I told you I'd win."
"You did not win," Flynn said.
"Whatever you say, Flynn," Yuri said, getting down on his knees to pick up dropped soldiers. "I'm confident in my victory. I don't need you to accept my win to know I kicked your ass."
"But you didn't win!" Flynn protested. "If Lady Estellise had taken your last territory out before mine, you would have come in third place."
"But she didn't," Yuri said, placing the pieces on the table. "So I won."
Flynn shook his head. "You're impossible."
The four of them cleaned up the game, put all the pieces away, and Estelle put it away again in the closet. She thanked them all for coming, and then it was time to head home.
"Goodbye, Yuri," she said, hugging him tightly at the doorway. "I had a lot of fun. Thank you for playing with me!"
"Any time," he said.
"You too, Flynn!" she said, pulling away from Yuri only to launch herself onto Flynn. "Sorry we got a little carried away at the end there."
Flynn smiled and patted her shoulder. "As long as you had fun. We should do this again sometime."
"Yeah!" she said.
"Have a good evening, Lady Estellise. Come on, Yuri," Flynn said, pulling away and walking through the door. "I'll walk you home."
"I don't need you to walk me home," Yuri said. "Not like I'm gonna get lost in my home town. What, is the noble commandant gonna protect me from muggers?"
"I thought maybe I'd take the chance to have a quiet conversation with you but if you're going to whine about maybe I'll just go back to my room."
They were still bickering as they turned the corner down the hall and walked out of sight.
"That was ridiculous," Rita said once they were gone. "I'm never playing that game again. Way too time consuming. I don't see the point in these lengthy board games with no real-world applications."
"Oh..." Estelle said, a bit put out. "Ok. I won't force you if you didn't like it."
That would have been the end of game night, if not for two weeks later when Estelle quietly sidled into the living room with something hidden behind her back and wide, pleading eyes.
Rita lowered her book with a sigh. "What now?"
Estelle held up the thing behind her box, amped up her puppy-dog eyes to the maximum level, and said, "What do you think of Monopoly?"